A week later on the Saturday night, work is packed. Mark, Gaby, and I are all working behind the bar, running around like headless chickens. Sadie, Sam, and Dinah are working the restaurant, which we’ve had to leave open an extra two hours so far to cater for some medical conference being hosted by UC Davis this weekend. That leaves Jake and Bruno manning the door and Dalyn—bless her soul—playing bar back for the night, saving all our asses and being a godsend.
Drew has been sitting at the far corner of the bar for the past hour, his expression unreadable, but I know that he’s here to talk. I wasn’t expecting to see him waiting for me tonight, especially after the radio silence since last week’s clusterfuck.
I haven’t been able to talk to him, firmly ensconced at the opposite end of the bar serving scientist after doctor after uptight professor letting loose.
An hour later, both Mark and Gaby have had their breaks, and I take my chance at getting at least a small respite of my own.
“Taking fifteen, babe,” I say in Gab’s ear, not wanting to disturb her mid-pour of a ten-long line of shots before catching Mark’s eye and giving him a nod.
I walk around the bar and wind my way through the crowd until I reach Drew.
“Hey,” I say, sidling up to him. “Wanna get some fresh air with me?”
He turns his torso my way and nods, his eyes shuttered, a guard I’ve never seen there before now well and truly in place. Sliding his stool back, he stands, notably not touching me, which is totally out of character. Drew is a tactile man, taking any chance he gets to brush up against or lean into me.
Not liking this change even if we can only be friends, I grab his hand and move toward the door, pulling him with me and not letting go. When we reach the sidewalk, I lead him around the corner and down the side of the building until we reach a bench by the back door.
I loosen my grip and he pulls free, bracing his feet in place as I take a seat and look up at him. “You’re a hard man to get hold of.”
“Kenz, I’m not sure there’s much left to talk about.”
“Actually, there’s a lot. I owe you an explanation for what you saw.”
A muscle in his jaw twitches and it just serves to make him look hotter. What is it about a strong, stoic man that transforms women into impromptu nutcrackers, wanting to break though the tough exterior to get to the goodness inside?
“Drew,” I say, reaching out and putting my hand on his arm.
He steps out of my touch but before I can say anything more, he takes a seat beside me, resting his elbows on his knees and running his fingers through his hair.
“It’s kind of a complicated story.”
He doesn’t look at me. Instead, he leans back against the table and stares off into the distance. “I caught up for a beer with Mills last night. He told me…”
I scoff, unable to hold it back. “Right. So he told you he lied to me and used me to sow his wild oats before the impending doom known as marrying your mate Lans?”
His gaze snaps to mine. “What?”
“I had no idea he was engaged. He said he was single. It wasn’t even a one-night stand. He saw me twice before driving back to town to take me to dinner. He had plenty of chances to tell me.”
He grits his teeth, the soft glow coming from the window behind giving me enough light to see a conflicted expression flash over his face.
Silence stretches between us and it starts to wear on me. I hate this. We’ve never had this kind of awkwardness between us. Drew’s effervescent personality and confident demeanor always take over.
“I don’t know what more you want me to say. I didn’t mislead you, Drew. I told you that I didn’t have more to give. I was—”
“It’s because of him, isn’t it? I never stood a chance.”
I want to touch him, comfort him, make him feel better. Unfortunately, that wouldn’t help either of us right now.
“I’m sorry, Drew. I almost wish I’d met you first. Would’ve saved me a hell of a lot of trouble, that’s for sure.”
He lifts his hands and scrubs his face, his eyes a puzzling mixture of hard and soft when they meet mine. “You really need to speak to Mills.”
That wasn’t what I expected him to say. “I think my hand slapping his face said everything I needed to.”
“Was that before or after you kissed him…?”
I open my lips to deny it, but I see his jaw tense. He’s got me there. “I’m sorry you saw that.”
“So am I, but it explained a lot. Then Millen cleared the rest up last night.”
“I wish you’d have let me explain.”
“Isn’t that what we’re doing now?” He shoots me that irresistible grin of his, and it’s almost my undoing.
“There’s nothing there, you know? I’m not a cheater, and I’m not about to become his bit on the side—again—before he gets married.”
“You really need to talk to him.”
I shake my head, focusing on my wringed hands in my lap to avoid letting Drew see the truth in my eyes—how seeing Millen still makes my heart skip, how I was unable to resist his kiss, how I haven’t been able to escape the memory of his body pressing into mine since the hall incident last week…
He places his large hand on top of my joined ones, reaching over and tilting my chin up so I’m looking at him. “It goes against everything I feel for you to say this and I hate it but let him explain.”
“What are you talking about? I told you about my mom and the affair.”
“Yeah, but you wouldn’t do that.”
“Not willingly, but he made me do it. And of all the fucking women in the world, it had to be Lana Mason.”
His brows go sky high. “What’s the deal there? You’re not exactly her favorite person either, apparently.”
A scathing laugh escapes my lips. “Oh right, ’cause she’s oh so fucking innocent.”
“I’ve known her a while. She’s pretty harmless.”
My head jerks back and I study his expression for any sign that he’s joking. Surely, he’s not serious. “Have you met her?” I ask, scandalized.
He chuckles, his eyes crinkling as he regards me. “She’s okay. She’s ambitious, I’ll give her that, but she’s got a good head on her shoulders.”
“Pity about the lack of personality and morals,” I mutter, making him laugh harder.
“I’m not sure morals have anything to do with it. She apparently had her eye on Millen for a while. Since before he left for college, I hear.”
“You’ve known him for that long?” I ask, wanting to ignore the fact that Lana left town around the same time she must’ve met Millen.
“Please tell me they haven’t been together since then,” I whisper, feeling sick to the stomach at the thought.
“Oh God no. Millen was anti-attachment in college. There was not a single pair of panties left intact after we’d finished our time in Texas,” he replies with an infectious grin.
I can’t help but smile back at him, a comfortable silence stretching between us. “You’re not like that now, though. You’re the nice guy.”
“Just what a guy wants to hear from a gorgeous woman he wants to keep sleeping with,” he mutters.
“Oh believe me, there’s nothing I’d like to do more.”
“Let’s go then,” he says, jokingly grabbing my hand with a tug. “I’m sure we can squeeze in a quickie in my car before you have to go back.”
I giggle and lean into him, loving the warmth of his body radiating into mine. He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me in even closer. Turning his head, he presses his lips to my temple and leaves them there.
Tears prick my eyes and instead of fighting them, I let them fall for the first time in a long time.
“Hear him out, Kenz. You can deny it as much as you like but it’s the only way you’ll be able to move on from this.” His voice is low, rumbling in his chest and vibrating through my body.
“I know,” I say with a sigh. “Doesn’t mean I can’t be angry with him.”
“He deserves a bit of anger, maybe some consideration, and definitely—more than anything—an open mind.”
I pull back and look at Drew, scrunching my face up. “What does that mean?”
He grins at me, shaking his head at the same time. “It means, when he comes to see you—which he no doubt will—let him explain. Let him tell you what happened. If I can understand, I’m sure you can too.” His expression goes serious. “But remember this, Kenz. Once you have closure from him, I’ll be right here waiting for you.”
My eyes fill with tears again but that doesn’t stop me from smiling over at him. “You would have to be the most stubborn man I’ve ever met.”
“Oh beautiful, you have no fucking idea, but give me the sign, and I’ll have more than enough fun proving you right.”
Drew stands and holds out his hand for me. Placing my palm in his, I let him pull me up, and together we walk hand in hand, back to the bar. My heart a little heavy, my eyes a little sore, and my head? Well, that’s more messed up than ever.