Mid-afternoon Saturday I’m standing at the park down from my house, using a tree trunk to stretch out my tired legs in preparation for the grueling torture of the five miles I’m about to run.
The best thing about working late nights is the sleep-in the next day. For a habitual night owl like myself, it’s honestly a perfect fit. A bar manager at thirty-two is definitely not where I saw myself when I was an idealistic, wide-eyed college freshman leaving home for U of C Irvine with the hopes of a law-enforcement career thirteen years ago. After graduation, I moved to San Francisco and joined the SFPD and thought that was when my life would start. But a few years in and I was struck by the overwhelming realization that being a cop wasn’t for me.
As someone who has always valued happiness over any preconceived notion of what I should do, I packed up my car and came back to Davis where my father welcomed me home with open arms.
Five years on, I’m loving my life, making the most of everything the world has to offer, enjoying hiking in summer on my rare days off, traveling in winter to go snowboarding, and going on torturous runs with my best friend.
“I hope that stripper pole routine isn’t a sign of things to come, Kenz. ’Cause those legs of yours may go for miles, but Grandpa Davis over there looks ready to have a coronary if you keep it up for much longer,” Gaby says behind me. I look over my shoulder to where she’s standing, looking like a pocket-rocket-sized gymnast. At five foot two, Gaby makes me look like an Amazonian tree woman.
“I bet that’s not the only thing that’s being kept up,” I say with a smirk. She moves to my side to get a better look at the old-timer’s line-up sitting on the park bench twenty feet away from us, just like they do every day.
“Oh look. Old man Lucas and Santa’s brother, George, are here today too. I bet if we make out they’ll have smiles for days.”
I shake my head at her. “Get your mind out of the gutter, short stuff. It would only take a grope.”
“And you’d know this how?”
“Because George told me last week after his third gin and tonic.”
Gaby giggles and nudges me with her shoulder.
“Well, before I get ideas to do something truly outrageous, we should get moving. I want time to grab something to eat before we’re due at the bar.”
“And you need time to make yourself look good for your barstool decoration tonight?”
I contemplate feigning confusion, but it’s Gaby and there’s no way I could hide anything from her. She’s known me since I was six years old and her brother, Hamish, pushed me into the mud just to see up my skirt. He was a pervert back then and he’s still a pervert now—it’s just he’s more of the pants-and-Grindr variety now. My gay husband whenever I need him, he’s the peas to my corn, and the cream in my coffee.
Gaby and I head off, our feet hitting the pavement in steady strides.
“He was very nice to look at, wasn’t he?” I muse.
She grins. “I couldn’t find a single fault. Even that little crook in the bridge of his nose was cute.
“And I thought I spent too much time looking at him.”
“Oh you did, and Bruno noticed too. But you never look at the clientele longer than a customary two-second scan, so it’s a relief to see you get bitten by the lust bug.”
“Take it back. He’s intriguing to me, that’s all.”
“And hot.”
“Well, there’s that too,” I reply with a laugh.
“And he’s coming back tonight.”
“That’s yet to be determined. I issued the challenge. Whether he rises to meet it is a whole other matter.”
“Bet he doesn’t need to hang out at the park to get things looking up.”
“You do know that everything out of your mouth is an innuendo of some sort, right?”
“I’m sorry, I thought my name was Gaby Wallace and therefore every second word had to have sexual connotations, otherwise Hamish would disown me.”
“That’s very true.” I nod, taking a right turn behind Gaby. Her legs may be a foot shorter than mine, but by God does she make up for it in speed.
“In all seriousness, though. He interests you, right?”
“I think so. I mean, it’s been a while since I’ve had someone live up to the hype of what their look promises.”
“You’re not even talking about sex are you?”
“Nope. I’m talking about the flirting, the chemistry—the way he played me in the best possible way and got my body reacting to everything he did with barely a touch.”
“Okay, stop talking. If you keep this up, I’ll need to run faster in order to get more time at home to rub one off before work.”
“Like you wouldn’t do it anyway.”
“Like you wouldn’t either.”
“Well, I need a clear head when it comes to him.”
“What’s his name anyway?”
“Millen Ross.”
“That’s a hot name. I can just imagine calling it out as you’re about to come. Oh Millen. God, Millen.” I shake my head and Gaby being Gaby, she grins. “It’s hot. I may not be getting any P in V action but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.”
“I like the thought of making him work for it. I don’t usually pick up guys at the bar.”
“I know you don’t and I love you for it—it means I get first dibs. That doesn’t mean you can’t though. Is he even from around here?”
“I have no clue. I know nothing about him other than he’s handsome and wicked, he has the sexiest bedroom eyes I’ve ever seen and knows the right words to say to get me ready to jump him over the bar without dirty talk, and when issued the challenge of the chase, it seemed to encourage him more.”
She speeds up, her strides coming double time as she starts to pull away from me.
“Gabs, what the hell?”
“Time’s a wasting. Step it up, Sharp.”
I come up beside her, my legs burning in the best possible way as sweat starts to pour off me in the afternoon sun.
“Because I have to take care of myself before work otherwise I might just jump the bar—and him—before you decide if you even want to. And that would break the best friend code of ethics. Therefore, me plus my best battery-operated friend equals a good time for me and more opportunities for you to jump his bones. It’s an easy win for both of us.”
“You’re terrible, Gabs.”
“I’m a realist. I keep it real so you don’t have to.”
“Right. Let’s get you home then.”
“Yes, to the diddle cave I go.”
A little after six p.m. I’m walking through the back door of the bar, hoping I’ll find Millen waiting on a stool for me. A little part of me shrinks back in disappointment when I don’t see him there.
Millen seemed to be looking to score last night, but a player wouldn’t come back for another go tonight. It’s one of the reasons I decided to challenge him to prove himself. It was worth the risk of him not coming back because if he’s truly interested in getting to know me and vice versa, then he’ll be back. If not, then I may have missed out on some hot sex, but that’s nothing I can’t give myself if I’m so compelled.
That’s definitely not something I need a man to do. I am woman—hear me roar.
“He’s not here?” Gaby says, not hiding her disappointment as she drops her purse in the drawer behind the bar and looks around the room.
“It’s early, Gabs.”
“Yes, but the early bird gets the worm, or in this case, the early worm gets the bird.”
“Are you two going to be able to get any work done tonight or are you going to sit here and peck over some guy’s carcass if he doesn’t come when commanded?” Bruno asks, appearing on the other side of the bar in front of us with a quirked brow and his tree trunk arms crossed over his chest.
“Oooh, I like that idea. A guy that could come on demand. You always read about the men doing it to the women in those romance novels, but imagine if you could make a guy last for at least three of your orgasms before he even came once,” Gaby muses, and just when I think she’s joking, I see that she’s actually scratching her head with a thoughtful look on her face.
“Your brain scares me,” I reply.
“It’s a magical place. Anyway, any big bookings tonight I should prepare for?” she asks, all jokes aside, her business face firmly in place. This is why I love this woman—she can switch it off on the turn of a dime. She’s also one of the hardest workers I know and always has my back, often realizing I need her to do something before I have a chance to ask.
“Let’s get started then. The busier we are, the less time I’ll have to think about that empty stool at the bar.”
“Exactly. Now, summer rock or indie grunge? What kind of mood are we going for with this early crowd?”
Surprisingly, I don’t give Millen another thought as the night passes, a constant stream of customers keeping us busy enough that it’s not until after ten that I realize I need to take a break.
I walk over toward Gaby, who’s leaning into the bar and talking to a couple of guys we went to school with.
“Gabs, I’m just going to take ten minutes in the office. Is that okay?”
“Sure is. I’ll keep an eye out for You Know Who.”
“No need,” I say, walking backwards. “If he was going to show, he would’ve done so by now. I guess the challenge was too much for his fragile male ego to take.”
Gaby’s wide eyes and knowing smirk don’t register until I hear Millen’s voice coming from beside me just as I reach the end of the bar. “I don’t think there’s anything fragile about my ego, but I’d be happy to go to the office with you and prove just how big and durable it really is.”
“Damn, Kenz. He’s got you there,” Gaby says with a laugh.
“He wishes he had me.”
“She’s right, I do, but I don’t think you’d appreciate me having her in the middle of the bar.”
“You never know, big boy. She’s been known to do a lot of things with a few drinks in her.”
I groan, my neck getting sore from the tennis match going on between the two of them. “Hello, I am still here, you know.”
“Could never forget that, Beautiful.”
Narrowing my eyes at him, I shake my head, trying to hold back a wry smile. “Why don’t you call me by my name?”
“Whenever you do that little grin of yours, I can’t help but think how beautiful you are. It’s kind of your thing now,” he says with a shrug.
I stand there watching him, waiting for him to look away first, wanting to actually get one over on him instead of feeling off-kilter whenever he’s near, but he doesn’t even flinch. If anything, his smirk gets bigger.
“Are you two going to get a room, or just get it over and done with right here? Because if this gets any hotter, I’m gonna need a cigarette and a recovery nap.”
That snaps me out of it. I jerk my head around exorcist-style toward Gaby, and at the quirk of her perfectly shaped brow, I burst out laughing.
Holding my hands up in surrender, I back away from the bar and toward the back hall. “Alright, I’m going.”
“We’re going, you mean,” Millen says, brazenly inviting himself along on my break. “If that’s okay with you, of course.”
“Oh, so now you ask if I mind?” My lips twitch, and his eyes drop to my mouth.
“Damn, you’re trouble.”
“And here I was thinking the same thing about you.” My back hits the door leading out back which stops me in my tracks and brings Millen in close, that damn lust-inducing cologne of his working its magic and muddling my intentions.
Just as his chest is about to meet mine, he throws his arm up above my head, pushing the door open. “After you…”
I turn around and lead the way, needing the breathing space to clear my head and cool my jets, knowing that a ten-minute break will never be enough time to get to the good stuff.
“How was your day?” he asks as he comes up beside me, his hand resting gently against the small of my back. It’s not the first time he’s touched me, but damn, if the feeling isn’t amplified by the fact we’re soon to be completely alone in my office.
I rethink the office idea, wanting to limit the temptation. This guy is a stranger to me. I know almost nothing about him except he’s persistent, sexy, good with his mouth—verbally, I have no way of knowing about any of his other talents in that respect—and a man of his word. He said he’d be here and despite my earlier misgivings about him giving me lip service to save face, he met my challenge of coming back in.
The least I can do is give the man some of my time. “Shall we—”
“I was thinking we could go out onto the roof. I could do with some fresh air.”
“Sounds good,” I say, pushing open the supply room door. Without thinking, I grab his hand and link our fingers, leading him with me to the fire exit and up the stairs to the roof. He takes over, walking us toward the bench swing in the far corner. Letting go, he swings his arm out to the seat and sits beside me shortly after.
“So tell me about yourself, Millen Ross. You’re definitely not from around here.”
“Nope. I’m staying at the hotel down the street and I saw a table and chairs up here this afternoon when I was looking out the window.”
I chuckle and grin up at him. “At least you’re honest.”
“Always.” His expression morphs into one of complete and utter sincerity. His grey eyes bore into me as if to drive it home.
“Good to know. I happen to believe it’s the only way to be.”
He drapes his arm across the top of the seat, brushing my shoulders and sending tingles straight through me. I tense for a second, part of me half expecting the arm move to be followed by a jump of the let’s-get-it-on variety, but it doesn’t happen. The warmth of his body next to mine seeps into me and I relax against him, the feeling so natural you’d think I’d known the guy for more than twenty-four hours. In fact, I’ve only spent thirty minutes actually talking to the guy.
“You’ll never find anyone as honest as I am. Well, except Gaby. She’s as straight as an arrow with anyone and everyone. Sometimes inappropriately so.”
“I got that.”
I turn and see his lips twitching. “She’s awesome though. There isn’t anyone else unrelated to me who would fight to the death for me like she would.”
“A good friend then.”
“The best.”
“Everyone needs people like that in their life.” He looks out to the horizon, the lights of Main Street twinkling against the dark night sky as the bass from the sound system below us shakes the roof.
“So what about you then?”
His fingers toy with the end of my ponytail, a move that would normally seem a little too familiar from an almost-stranger, but with him, it’s nice. Maybe too nice. “What about me?
I rest my cheek against his forearm and meet his eyes, our faces way inside each other’s personal bubble. “Tell me something about yourself so I don’t feel weirded out at being so comfortable with you so soon.”
His eyes flash then soften. Whatever this is between us, it’s definitely not one-sided and knowing that, I relax into his side.
“I love watching documentaries, especially true crime,” he says.
I drop my hand to rest on his leg, needing a connection with him. “I studied criminology and criminal justice at UC Irvine,” I reply with a wry smile.
His eyes widen, his lips curving up in a slow grin. “You don’t say? So how does a—”
“How does a woman headed for a career in law enforcement end up running a bar?”
“Pretty much,” he says with a laugh.
“I tried it, being a cop.” I mindlessly trace slow circles on his leg. “It was fulfilling until it wasn’t me anymore. I have enough trust issues as it is without needing to deal with the worst of the worst in people too.”
He lifts a brow. “You didn’t like your life so you made a change?”
“I walked away and moved back home from San Francisco to Davis,” I reply. His eyes flash with something unknown, his expression unreadable. The only thing I know is that I might die if he stops playing with my hair, or if he moves his hand resting on my hip. He’s looking at me as if I’m the sun and he’s just coming out into the light.
I study his face, his tan skin, the shallow laugh lines at the corners of big grey eyes that hold so much depth, I’m sure I’d get lost if I looked long enough. There’s a flash of mystery in them, hidden behind a smoke screen that no doubt keeps his secrets under lock and key. Secrets I find myself wanting to discover. Secrets I want to know as much as I need my next breath.
His gaze grows hooded as I continue watching him, his strong jaw that I want to cup in my hands, the light five o’clock shadow I want to feel against my fingertips, against my skin, between my legs.
I want this man. I want him without knowing anything about him, but desperately needing to.
He inches his face closer to mine, his breath fanning against my parted lips. The strings I felt pulling me toward him continue to tighten—it’s almost as if it would be impossible for me to pull away. That’s if I’d even want to at this point.
Millen’s hand glides up my side, his thumb grazing the side of my breast. My body hums under his touch, arching into him, needing more. “When do you need to go back?” he asks.
“Probably now,” I whisper, my eyes caught in his. I never want to escape.
His gaze drops to my lips then back to my eyes, his breath quickening as his hands frame my face, his fingers flexing against my jaw. “Come home with me tonight,” he murmurs against my lips, a sliver of air the only thing between us. Something stops me from closing that final distance.
“Come to dinner with me next week,” I whisper, fighting the urge to trace his mouth with the tip of my tongue. To give myself a little taste of what I know is going to come later.
His eyes widen infinitesimally before he smiles against my chin, his forehead dropping to rest against mine. “You’re gonna be the death of me, Kenz. Just when I think I have you figured out, you surprise me.”
“I—”
“I like it,” he says, robbing me of words.
I don’t know what this intense connection between us is all about and it may have taken me by surprise, but, in order to understand it, I need to get to the man behind it.
“Let me take you home tonight,” he says, his voice a low rasp.
Pulling back slightly, I’m stopped when his strong hands tense, holding me in place. “Just take you home, make sure you get there safely.” He shifts back, pinning me with his penetrating gaze. “And definitely kiss.” His eyes darken and drop to my lips once more. “Because if I have to wait a week, I’m likely to lose my mind.”
How can I say no to that? “Just to my door,” I reply, moving back, partly to get out of this addictive force field I’ve found myself in.
He puts his hand over his heart and shoots me a smirk full of dirty promises my body eagerly wants to accept.
“You’re trouble, Millen Ross.”
“Funny,” he says, standing up and holding an arm out toward me. “I was just thinking the same thing about you.”