Chapter 15
Katya
Carter turned down the music as he drove up a long winding dirt road in the woods.
“Where are we going?”
“We’re going to park at my home, walk a short way into the woods, then shift.”
My heart raced at the thought. What if I couldn’t shift? Or if I got stuck as a jaguar? Or something went wrong and I ended up half-human and half-jaguar?
“Are you okay?”
I struggled to find my voice. “Can anything go wrong while shifting?”
“Like what?”
“Not shifting all the way? Or not returning back to normal? Or… I don’t know. Anything at all?”
He rested his hand on my knee and gave a gentle squeeze. “It’s going to go fine, other than hurting. But the pain is normal, and given how long you’ve put this off, it’ll probably be quick.”
“Okay.” I wasn’t sure the word came out audible.
We came to a gate, and behind it was a gorgeous sprawling fully-restored blue Victorian-era mansion.
“You live here?”
He pressed a button on his visor, and the gate opened. “It’s not as impressive as your hotel, but yes, this is where I call home. It belongs to Toby.”
My math professor lived here? If he could afford not only the home but the land around it, what was he doing teaching math? Just for the fun of it?
“Toby likes to keep the appearance of being like the humans,” Carter said, as though hearing my thoughts. “That’s why he teaches. Well, that and he loves math. He’s a nerd like that.” Carter parked between a Hummer and a Bentley.
I was out of place—way out of my element. No one in my family even owned a car. We walked everywhere because the hotel was in such a central location.
Carter cut the ignition and turned to me, taking a deep breath. “There’s one more thing you need to know.”
“What?”
“We have to disrobe before shifting. Turning while dressed will destroy our clothes. That’s partly why I brought you here. There are female shifters in my pack if you’d be more comfortable. They’re werewolves, but they know all about shifting. Usually, whenever possible, shifters turn separately—not in mixed company. But sometimes it can’t be avoided.”
“Oh.” My voice caught in my throat. I hadn’t even considered clothes.
“On the other hand, if you’d be more comfortable with me, I swear I’ll keep my back turned the whole time. It’s whatever you want.”
My mind raced. I didn’t really want to shift with people I didn’t know, but I also hadn’t expected to get naked with Carter, either. I’d never gone past kissing with any guy.
“Katya?”
I turned to him, but couldn’t meet his gaze.
“I can introduce you to them. They’re all really nice. There’s Toby’s wife, Victoria, and her mom and sister, and another werewolf named Stella. She was born human and was turned a few years back. Maybe you’d be more comfortable with her.”
Finally, I met his gaze. I swallowed then shook my head. “No, you’ve been the one with me every step of the way. I trust you.”
He leaned over and pressed his mouth on mine, tasting of mint. His rugged, woodsy scent overwhelmed me. “I promise to be fully worthy of your trust.”
We got out of the car and headed to the woods. After walking for about ten minutes, he stopped and turned to me.
My pulse raced so fast I could hardly breathe. Maybe this was a bad idea. A really bad idea. Or maybe it was all a joke. People don’t turn into animals. It was scientifically impossible. Not improbable, but actually impossible. What if this was all a horrible joke?
Carter put his hand on my arm.
I jumped.
“Everything is going to be fine. I promise.” He smiled reassuringly.
I didn’t feel any better.
“Once we’re jaguars, you’ll feel so great that you won’t even remember how nervous you were. Being scared is normal. I was secretly terrified the first time I shifted.”
“You were?”
He kissed my palm. “Don’t tell anyone, but I nearly wet myself. I was with my dad, uncles, and cousins. They had all shifted hundreds of times before. Basically, they just wanted to watch and see if I’d handle it like a man. Nobody really explained what would happen. I was just entertainment for them. That was just part of the initiation into manhood.”
“That’s terrible.”
Carter nodded. “Traditional jaguar shifters are. What you can expect is pain, like I said before. Our bones completely transform and fur slices through our skin. It can feel like fire because it’s so fast. Your muscles will feel like they’re being torn apart—they’re not. But then once you’re in jaguar form, all will be right with the world.”
“Does turning back hurt as much?”
“I never usually remember. It isn’t unusual to lie down to fall asleep, then to wake in my human form.”
“Naked?” I exclaimed, horrified at the thought of accidentally being discovered like that.
He nodded. “That’s why we leave changes of clothes in various places around the woods and behind the mansion. But I also shift fully awake and aware plenty of times. You’ll be fine either way. I’ll protect you, and I swear I’ll be a perfect gentleman. No peeking, I give you my word.”
A wave of confidence ran through me. I needed to take advantage of it. “Let’s do this.”
Carter squeezed my hand. “Just stick your clothes in a bush. We’ll try to turn back near here.”
I nodded, already feeling my confidence waning.
He turned around and pulled off his shirt.
We were really doing this.
Carter pulled off his belt.
I spun around, face flaming.
This was actually happening. My heart raced even faster than before. I shook so hard I could barely get my jersey off. Behind me came the sounds of him sliding off his jeans.
My mind raced, and my hands stumbled even more. I took a deep breath and focused only on removing my uniform. I folded it and set it on the ground. Wearing only my underwear, I turned to make sure he wasn’t looking.
He wasn’t. He also had nothing on.
I whipped back around and struggled with my bra clasp.
“How’s it going over there?” Carter asked.
“A-almost done.” I quickly stripped down and shoved the clothes inside a bush. “Now what?”
“Just focus on shifting. You can talk to your jaguar if she’s nervous about coming out.”
“She? Isn’t it me?”
“Yeah, of course, but a lot of shifters find that it helps. The werewolves even refer to their wolf selves as their inner wolf.”
I closed my eyes and whispered for my jaguar self to emerge. My bones popped and cracked. It started with my ribs and hips, but then moved all over—to my neck and knees and even the bones in my hands and feet.
The searing pain I’d felt back at the gymnasium returned. My muscles burned. If I didn’t know better, I’d have thought I was actually being burned to death.
I screamed, unable to stay silent. The sounds echoed all around me. More cracking bones. It felt as though every bone was breaking in half. I cried out again—if I had even stopped yelling in the first place.
Carter said something, but I couldn’t understand him over my hollering. Hopefully, he wasn’t telling me to be quiet. That wasn’t possible.
I pressed a hand against a tree to steady myself. It didn’t help. I fell to my knees. Knives dug into my skin. All over my body. No, that was the fur forcing its way out.
Why had I agreed to this torture?
A pain worse than all the others enveloped me. It was indescribably horrifying.
Everything turned black.