Presley

 

I wake up feeling disoriented and sore. I look around, trying to figure out where I am and why I can’t move my arm. Then it all hits me at once when I look down and see Barrett curled up, laying on my arm. He cried himself dry and then fell asleep in my arms, and from the looks of things, I fell asleep too. I couldn’t leave him. He looked like he was finally able to find some kind of peace, even in the smallest form last night, and the fact that he let me share that with him humbles me. I slowly try to move my arm but he is solid and it won’t budge. He seems to be sleeping soundly but if I stay where I am another second, I’m going to wet this bed, so I push him slightly while wrenching my arm from him. He doesn’t even move, and if it wasn’t for his warm breath, I’d think he was gone. I smile down at his sleeping form and make my way to what I hope is a bathroom down the hall. My bladder is about to explode.

After I wash my hands, I look up and almost gasp at my appearance. I wash my face with cold water and run my fingers through my hair. I find the toothpaste in the cabinet above the sink and try to brush my teeth the best I can with my finger. I open the door and scream.

“It’s a good thing Barrett is deaf and I have a good heart. Jesus, girl, you just scared ten years off my life,” Randy says as he clutches a hand to his chest.

“Crap, I’m so sorry, Randy. I wasn’t expecting to see you there.”

“Shouldn’t that be my line? This is my house, right?” he asks, looking around comically. It makes me giggle.

“It is. I’m sorry for the intrusion. I wasn’t expecting to stay, but he had a rough night and wanted me to stay, I hope you don’t mind.”

I can tell he wants to say something but whatever it is he’s holding back. We might as well get it all on the table.

“Let me grab my purse and text my roommate so she doesn’t flip out. Then I’ll meet you in the kitchen. If you have fresh coffee I might even make you breakfast.” His face lights up and he wastes no time heading to the kitchen.

As expected, Jodi had several texts waiting for me, but she assumed I was still here. I sent her a quick text updating her, and then I make my way to the kitchen.

“Do you mind?” I ask, Randy pointing to his fridge.

“Help yourself, although I’m not sure you will be able to make anything from what’s in there. I need to find time to go to the store.

“How does an omelet sound?”

“Like heaven. How do you take your coffee?”

“As strong as possible.”

“No cream or sugar?”

“And taint it? Never.”

He laughs and hands me a steaming cup of amazing smelling coffee. He might not keep much food in the house, but he has good taste in coffee. I tell him so and he chuckles. I grab all the ingredients I need to whip out a few omelets in no time. I’m surprised at how nice and clean his place is for a bachelor. It’s modern and sleek with all granite tops and chrome appliances.

“One ham and cheese omelet, sir,” I say, placing his plate in front of him.

“Bless you, my child.” He takes a huge bite and moans.

“Did your mom teach you how to cook?” I can’t help the laughter that bubbles out of me.

“That would be a huge no. My mom is a world class surgeon, so she doesn’t have time for trivial things like cooking. We’ve had the same cook for fifteen years named Marcela. She is a genius in the kitchen and she started sneaking me cooking lessons when I was younger.”

“To Marcela.” Randy raises his coffee mug and clinks mine. He is so different from his nephew. He is so light and fun, where Barrett seems to have the entire world resting on his shoulders.

After we finish eating, Randy sits quietly for a moment, eyeing me. I smile and set my fork down.

“You want to know why I’m still here.” It’s not a question, but he nods, looking sheepish.

“I know it’s none of my business, Barrett is an adult now, but I worry.”

“Of course it’s your business. For starters, it’s your house, and you care about him. I wasn’t planning to stay, but he needed me and I couldn’t say no.”

“He asked you to?” Randy looks thoroughly shocked now.

“That surprises you?”

“Yes. He hasn’t wanted me anywhere near since…” He trails off, looking disheartened.

“Sometimes it’s easier to open up to strangers. You aren’t worried about their feelings or saying the wrong thing. There is something freeing about no strings attached. It’s not you, Randy. I have a beacon that calls to hurting people.”

“You are a special young lady, I’ll say that. I’m just worried that…well, I’m just going to be frank because I don’t know how else to say this, so please don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m worried this might be too soon?”

“This?”

“You.”

“I’m not sure I follow.”

“You make him forget his pain in the moment, but until he faces it head on, he’s just running from it. I’m afraid of what happens if Barrett uses you as a band-aid and then once the pain starts hurting again, if he’s going to blame you for not having the same effect that you used to. He needs to deal with his brother’s death before he starts anything romantic, Presley. I hope you understand where I’m coming from.”

I take a moment to digest everything he just said. Part of me is hurt by it. I’m not just a band-aid or someone to use to feel good in the moment, but what if that’s exactly what I’m becoming? There isn’t anything romantic going on between us, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t open to something happening. After the connection we shared last night, I was sure there was something there, but Randy is right. Now is the worst possible time to start something. I have no clue what to say, so I stay quiet and continue to sip my coffee.

“I’ve offended you. I’m sorry, sweetheart. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“I’m not offended, I’m just not sure what to say. I think you have the wrong impression of Barrett and I, but I’d be lying if I said I’d be opposed to anything happening…although I know this is the worst possible time to start something as well. But you are wrong about one thing. I’m not a band-aid that’s covering up his pain and making him feel good. I’m cleaning out all the bad, I’m opening up his wounds. I’m letting him be angry, and giving him a safe place to take out those feelings. He needs someone he can do that with who he isn’t connected to.”

“And you don’t think that’s going to get messy?”

“Sure, it will. The best things usually do. Obviously, this is the very worst time to start anything, and just so you know, we haven’t. Our relationship is purely platonic. But if something were to start, I can’t say I would be the one to stop it.” I wait a beat then look up into his eyes. “Will you?” I ask him boldly, and he smiles wide and places his hand on mine.

“I like you, Presley. You are refreshing. I would be very happy if my nephew were lucky enough to be with you, I just want to make sure you’re both thinking this through.”

“Right now, he isn’t in a place to think anything through. I will give you my word that I won’t rush anything or push him for more than he can give. Right now, I just want to be his safe place…and maybe feed you both,” I add with a smile.

“Hey, you won’t get any complaints from me. Between you and I only, I could really use your help, so I won’t send you away. Just the fact that you got him to eat and open up to you last night says more than words can. I also would like you to help me with my signing, if you wouldn’t mind.”

“Me? Just ask Barrett—I’m not very good.” I laugh. “I’m using it more with my fieldwork and I’m taking a course, but I’m nowhere to the level that he is. However, anything I can help you with, I’m happy to.”

“Sounds like a deal, girl. Crap, I need to get my butt down to the shop. I’m drowning over there.”

“I have the next three days free without classes. I’d be happy to pick up some things from the store and do some errands for you if you need. Is that weird?”

“Truthfully? Yes. It’s extremely weird that a girl we only met a few times is stepping up in such a big way, but to be honest, I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I’m drowning here with all this and I’m willing to take any help I can get. You seem like good people, and I’ve known Brian and his family a long time, and they vouch for you. As long as B wants you around, I’m happy to have you and grateful for the help.”

“Perfect. Any grocery requests?” Randy laughs at that.

“Girl, I will literally eat anything, and as long as you are doing the work, you can get whatever your heart desires. But only if you take some money.” He reaches in his back pocket and I start to protest when he shoots me one of his nephew’s famous looks.

“Doing my shopping and taking care of us on your dime would be downright creepy, Presley. Take the cash and don’t make this awkward, okay?” I chuckle, finding myself really liking this guy.

“Okay.”