Yawning as I rubbed my growing bump, I managed to open both my eyes and keep them open for a few seconds before they slowly began to close again. This was every morning for me: a struggle to get up and get out of bed to start the day.
Pregnancy had really kicked me in the ass and knocked all the energy out of me these last couple weeks. I blamed Griffin for the size of our daughter. I was going to be pushing out a good-sized baby and tearing my vagina to shreds in the process.
Walking out from his shower, naked and not a care in the world, Griffin shook his head, just laughing. “You know, you don’t have to get up yet. Stay in a little longer.”
“I need to clean, cook, and hide all those sex toys you brought.”
“They’re in the cupboard. No one needs to be in our room, so they’re safely hidden from everyone except us,” he said, pulling on a pair of boxer shorts. “I must say, I’m surprised you were up for that last night.”
I would have rolled my eyes if I were not too tired. “What can I say. I was in a horny mood and just wanted to feel your cock fucking me.” Pushing the covers off, I slowly started to get up, glaring at him. “Just be grateful that you got laid.”
“True. Pussy has been on lockdown lately.” He teased, walking towards me and helping me up out of bed.
I yawned again and flicked his arm in response. “My ass is on lockdown. Trust me, your cock in there is the last thing I feel like.”
He roared in laughter. “I’m just kidding, pretty.”
Doing his usual morning routine of dropping down to both knees and running his hands over my bulging bare stomach, he placed a string of kisses against my skin and talked to our child. It melted me every morning to see this, hearing him reading stories to the baby or just talking about his day and how much he could not wait to meet him or her. He had no idea that the baby was a girl.
I showered, and almost forty minutes later, I was joining the others in the kitchen. Seven months pregnant, I felt like it took me forever to do something as simple as walk from one room to another. I was expecting to see everyone, but it was only Mack inside eating a bowl of cereal.
“Where’s your brother and Dad?” I asked, opening the fridge and pulling out the bacon. I could eat bacon all day long and be a very happy woman.
“Outside, they’re cleaning up the barbie for lunch today.”
That was another thing that had slipped my mind. His parents were joining us for lunch after a surprise trip announcement. They knew I was pregnant; They just did not really comment on it. It was the elephant in the room. It was there, but we didn’t talk about it. It’s sad, really. My parents, on the other hand, could not contain their excitement, and Mum often came to visit with little gifts for her grandchild.
The nursery was almost complete. Actually, it was complete, but I was buying little things online when I had insomnia. Our mailman must love me and my weekly packages.
“Why don’t you see your friend anymore?” he asked, out of the blue as I sat down with my food. “You know, the one Dad hated.”
That took me by surprise. It was hard to keep my shock hidden. I felt the need to point out an actual fact. “He still hates him.”
Mack laughed, nodding. “Yeah, but only because he’s jealous. Did you two have a fight?”
Harvey was not someone who I really felt like talking about. I have pushed it under the rug for so long, trying to forget about him and not care. It was hard, knowing he had become a father to a boy. He never reached out or tried to make contact, so I did not see the point in extending the same branch.
“Harvey moved on. Sometimes, people change and grow apart. It happens. Anyway, enough about that. Is Samuel coming over for lunch too?” I asked. It was normal for his boyfriend to join us. It was not a bother. They had been dating for quite some time, and he was always here.
His eyes widened. “But, Nan will be here.”
Yes, she was not too thrilled knowing that her grandson was dating a dude. “So?”
His voice went quiet. “She won’t be happy.” Griffin’s mother definitely did not like Samuel.
“I don’t care. Invite him. He’s part of the family.”
Being heavily pregnant, my conversations were also limited. Before long, I began to feel puffed out and tired. I hated it. I needed a nap when I had not even started the day. Unfortunately, today was not a day that I could just lay down and rest. I needed to get stuff down and work like a boss around the house.
Pulling out the mop, I scowled as I filled the bucket with hot water and waited. A pair of arms sliding around my waist and a smile took away the annoyance I was feeling.
“You look tired, baby. Go lay down. I’ll do all this.”
Not a chance in hell. “As much as I would love that, I can’t. You know I can’t.”
“Ayla, you’re exhausted. Go rest. You need to rest, remember? The doctor told you to take it easy.”
I hated that he brought that up. At four months, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find blood. I screamed murder. Not quite but almost, and Griffin rushed me to the hospital. I was having a threatened miscarriage. The baby was safe and sound, but there was a small bleed, and it could still lead to me losing it—my worst fear. From then on, Griffin had set me a rule to follow: When I was tired, I rest. Actually, I was to rest all the time and not do much.
It became boring after a while.
“I’m okay to mop.” Turning around in his arms, I pushed my belly against his stomach and rested my head on his chest. “I don’t want her to think I’m lazy.”
“Pretty…” His finger brushed underneath my chin, tilting my head back as he placed his hand over my burgeoning stomach, spreading his fingers out. “You’re close to giving birth. Rest now. It’s an order.”
This time, I rolled my eyes and cocked my head to the side. “I’m only thirty-two weeks or thirty-three, Griffin. I’m good for a couple more months.”
Pulling away, he frowned and looked at me with an odd expression. “Ayla, you’re thirty-eight weeks tomorrow.”
I laughed. He was taking this too far by trying to trick me. I tilted my head back. “No. I’m not, I’m…” I started to work it out in my head and panic seeped in. My breathing increased, and my lips formed an O. “But… No, no…”
“Yes. You’re due at the end of the month. See? You’re so tired, you’re forgetting everything, Ayla.” He was not scolding, just grinning because he was right. “Now, ass on that couch and relax.”
This time, I did listen. I walked in a daze to the living room and sat down on the charcoal sofa. It was big enough to be used as a bed. We wanted a lazy couch, and this was definitely one. Yawning, I tried to get comfortable despite my restless legs. How could I have forgotten my own due date? Closing my eyes, I heard Griffin quietly giving out orders for the boys to clean their room and help tidy up as I slowly drifted to sleep.
***
I jerked awake when I felt a hand against my stomach. “What time is it? Your parents—”
“Are an hour away. Housework is all done, and you can rest up easy.” He leant in, kissing me softly.
“You know,” I smiled, making myself more comfortable. “How about we call the baby by her name?”
“You’ve picked out a unisex name?” he laughed, looking unconvinced. “No offence, but I’m not naming my baby a—Wait, you said she?”
“I found out last week. I’m sorry, the doctor slipped up and said she was growing well.” I grinned. He did not want to know, but I could not help myself.
“A girl,” Griffin said to himself. His eyes were watching me closely in case I was going to tell him I was kidding. I did not, and he broke out into a huge smile. “Well, shit. I think I owe the older kids two fifty bucks each.”
I exclaimed, “Griffin, not cool.”
“I thought it was a boy. I was sure of it.”
I started to stand up. “You are unreal.” Betting on our child? How could he? Actually, it did not surprise me one bit, really. “I should have made a bet with you also then.”
I felt his presence following behind me as I walked down to our bedroom. “Well, what’s the name?”
“Hmm, how about you bet on that and lose some more money?” I grinned, flashing a smile over my shoulder at him. “Anyway, I think I like, Harper.”
“Harper?” he repeated, sounding unsure. “Okay.”
He did not like it. “We can think of some others later if you don’t like it.”
“No, I like it.” He smiled warmly. “Harper James.”
“Good, because I wasn’t changing it.” I winked as I pulled up my tank top and tossed it in the clothes basket, changing for a shower.
“Will your tits shrink again?” he asked, walking straight towards me, preying on my chest with open palms, and gently squeezing.
“What if my water breaks during sex?”
His face scrunched, then a smile crept over. His eyes danced with mischief. “Well, I guess it’ll be no different to you squirting.”
It was my turn to pull a face. “Gross.” Pushing his hands away, I went into the wardrobe to grab another top. “And for your information, they will shrink, so enjoy. You won’t get to see them this big again.”
“Well, not until I knock you up again.” He peeked in the walk-in and stood there, watching me change.
I shook my head but could not shake it fast enough. “No more.”
“What? No, you don’t mean that.”
I laughed humourlessly. “Yes, I do. I am fat, tired, and aching all over. I’m not having any more.”
His smile dropped, and his eyes shot me a glare. “Yes, you are. She needs someone to play with, so get used to the idea of another—”
I cut him off. “Griffin...”
“Ayla, it’s going to happen. Deal with it.”
As soon as he walked away, I let out a frustrated scream and finished pulling the top back on. He was not the one who had to give birth or grow a baby. No, he got to keep his body and shape. I was the one dealing with uncontrollable discharge and morning sickness all day.
I went to yell that out to him when I heard the doorbell ring and voices at the door.
Maybe I could just ignore them and go back to bed. Yeah, tough luck on that.
Samuel and Mack were on the couch watching a movie as Toby rode his BMX bike around outside. His parents were still here hours later with no intention of leaving. There was not one question about the baby, and whenever it was brought up by Griffin, they shot him down. Not so much his dad, but more his mother. She just glared at my belly.
Poor baby. She had done nothing to her. At least I was taking care of my baby way better than Karen had done.
“Oh, no. I’ll do that,” I told her, standing up as she went to clear the table. “I’m sure you want to catch up with Griffin.” My back was aching even more, but I managed a smile and reached for the stack of plates to pick them up.
“Ayla, leave them.” My overprotective husband warned me. “Sit and take it easy.”
I halted, shooting him a glare. “I can manage.”
“Leave them.”
Why was I so annoyed at being told not to do anything? I should be loving it, but I was not. I felt agitated, annoyed, and really sad. Yes, my waterworks were coming on, all because he told me to not to do anything.
He noticed my eyes blurring and sighed softly. “Sweetheart...”
“I’m okay.” I turned my eyes to his parents. “Hormones.” I did not really know how else to explain it.
Paul smiled, looking slightly uncomfortable. It was annoying.
“Teresa,” I began. “Look, I’m heavily pregnant. It’d be nice if you could acknowledge it.”
“Dear... Oh, it’s not that. We just feel… Well, we feel guilty.” Her voice wavered. “We can’t possibly be mad about the baby. It’s wonderful, but we just.”
Griffin stood up and glared. “What would you feel guilty for?”
Had I passed out? What the heck was happening? I felt in the dark with this conversation. What would he be so mad for? It did not make any sense.
“We didn’t know she was hurting the boys. We would have never helped her otherwise.”
My eyes widened, looking at Teresa as my mouth began to open.
Griffin’s voice made us all jump. “You got her that lawyer, didn’t you?”
Everything soon began to unravel. His parents tried explaining how she came to them in a state of panic, fearing that she would lose her children, and somehow convinced them that she could take better care of them than their own son. His parents saw how hurt and miserable their son had been when we came to visit, and all along, they knew everything.
They helped her take the kids from us, from him.
“Please, leave,” I said softly, standing up. “It’s time you both go.” I could not hear anymore and did not want the boys to either. They would feel more than betrayed.
“Ayla, please…”
I rubbed my lower back. The aching intensified as I gritted my teeth and ignored it. “Please, you and Paul should go.”
“Ayla…”
I could tell by his tone that Griffin was worried. “I’m okay. Just need a hot shower.” For like, an hour.
“I can’t believe you two watched how much she fucked up our lives, and you knew all along. You handed my kids to that bitch for them to get beaten!” He was seething with anger, pacing as he looked at his parents in horror.
“We know...” Teresa wailed, moving closer to him. “Do you think we don’t regret it? Every day. Oh, Griffin, we regret it every day.”
“You fucked up, Mum. Big fucking time.”
I was frozen to the spot, unable to move as I felt a stabbing pain hit my lower back. “Griffin...” I breathed out, trying to hold my breath.
No one heard me.
“Griffin, we’re sorry! Please, son. You have to see it from our side.” Paul started, pleading.
“Griffin...” I tried again. My stomach was beginning to cramp up. “Baby…”
“No. I’ll never understand. You paid her a good fucking lawyer and left your son to fend for himself.”
I could not hold it in any longer. “I’m in labour! My water just broke.”
Not the best way to go about things.
All eyes were on me. The three of them looked stunned as I stood there, tears streaming down my cheeks and water running down my thighs like I had just wet myself. This was it, what we had been waiting for, and now I was terrified.
“Are you sure?” he asked, looking completely freaked out.
“No, dickhead. I’m wetting myself for the fun of it.” I could not believe he asked that. “I’m having contractions. Get the kids. We need to leave.”
Our bags were already in the car. His parents offered to stay at the house with them, but he refused. So, they were in the waiting room with the boys and Sam while I was hauled off and hooked up to an IV drip, stripped naked in a gown, and laid on a bed, groaning in agony.
Griffin walked in looking like a ghost and stood by the door. “I’m terrified.”
Now he decided to admit this. Mr, who was so excited for the baby to be here, now decided to tell me he was scared. “You have to be kidding me.” I was the one who was terrified.
“No, Ayla. I am fucking scared right now.”
I rolled my eyes. “Well, maybe just do whatever you did with the boys when they were being born?” He had to have some clue. “I’m new at this.”
He shook his head. “Ayla…” His voice dropped as he made his way over, shame and regret filling his pained expression. “I didn’t come in the room when she was in labour. I waited outside.”
“And you tell me this now?” I snapped, reaching for his hand and squeezing hard. “How… I mean… Ahh, shit. This hurt so damn much.”
“I never wanted them, so I didn’t really come to any appointments or anything.”
“Of all times. You could have told me this like, I don’t know, yesterday maybe? Not while I’m almost a fist dilated.”
A soft chuckle came from him, and his hand rubbed soothingly over my belly as I laid there trying to focus on my breathing. “I love you. Can I get you anything?”
Throwing my head back on the pillow, I began to cry. “I want the drugs. Get me the drugs!”
***
Thirty minutes later, I had pushed out an echidna. Kidding, but it felt like that.
I was completely in love as I held my crying baby daughter in my arms with my husband passed out on the bed beside us. Yes, he fainted when he took one look at the placenta and dropped down like a drunk man passing out.
I laughed quietly to myself. He can fuck me with a period, but as soon as he saw blood, he was out like a light. I was so glad the nurse was taking photos and videos for us.
“That’s your daddy over there,” I whispered as the doctors cleaned me up down there. “He’s just having a nap.”
I was too focused on her to notice the needle and stitch they were about to insert—her big eyes, dark hair, and perfect pout. I finally got that feeling, the feeling of having my own child and being so immensely in love that I would do anything for her. I loved the boys, but I did not ever get to experience this moment with them.
My whole world would revolve around her. Everything I would now do was for her. I was a mother, and it was the most incredible experience of my life.
“She’s perfect.” I heard a whisper from beside me. Griffin was on his feet as he slowly walked to the chair beside the bed. “She looks just like you.”
I smiled, looking up towards him and meeting his gaze. “Thank you,” I whispered.
He frowned, looking confused. Maybe he was still dizzy from the blackout. “For what? You did all the hard work.”
Shaking my head, I melted against him as his arms wrapped around me. “For letting me have this, for being able to experience what it’s like to have a child of my own.”
He looked down, understanding fully what I meant. “I should never have made you promise something like that. I don’t deserve you, Ayla, but I’ll earn your love every day.”
“I love you, and you deserve that.” I smiled. “You and the boys deserve to be loved, and I will show you that every day.”
“You’re beautiful.” Leaning in, he pressed his lips against mine. “I’m sorry for passing out.”
I laughed against his lips, murmuring. “Don’t worry. You can make it up to me with the next one.”
His brows raised. “Another one?”
“Oh, yeah. I want more...”
“One, right? How many are we talking about here?” His tone was low. It almost made me laugh.
Shrugging, I looked back to our daughter. “I’m not sure yet. Harper needs some brothers and sisters.”
“Ayla, how many? You can’t just say that. Jesus.”
I knew he was beginning to panic, and that made all the more fun taunting him. “I don’t know. I’ll let you know when I’m done.”
“You said no more this morning. What changed?”
“Holding her in my arms, that feeling of explosive love I just experienced. I feel like I was born to be a mother, and it’s crazy. I really can’t wait to have another baby with you.”
His smile grew, and he reached over and taking our daughter from my arms. “Yeah, I get that. I think we should introduce her to her two older brothers now, though. I’m sure our parents are hanging out to meet this beauty as well.”
I agreed, then realised I was still all naked and gross with a doctor staring at my vagina. “Just wait until we’re in the room, and then we can get them all in.”
He nodded, sitting down and rocking Harper close against his chest. “I love you, my two girls.”