It took some time, but eventually I fell into a fitful sleep last night. I tossed and turned and the dreams that plagued my mind were nothing I’d ever want to see again. I got up and turned on the T.V. and decided to get used to this as my fate. It’s not like this was something new, I mean I’ve been here done this before. Like clockwork as old times Lucifer came to my room in the morning breakfast in hand. The only difference now is that I didn’t have control of the lock.

He placed the plate and orange juice on the nightstand and went to leave. “So, we’re back to square one?” I asked.

He grunted but continued walking away. “So that’s how this is going to be? You think you’re just going to lock me in here and I’ll sit quietly?” I asked my anger pulsing.

He spun on his heels to face me. His grey eyes resembled a brewing storm and were the only indication I was getting to him. I got up and walked until I was only a few steps away from him. “You should know better than that by now.” I said not letting my gaze waver from his. Without giving him a chance to react I turned back around and took my seat on the bed. I picked up the plate and began eating a piece of bacon not acknowledging his presence. It wasn’t until I heard the lock click into place did I release the breath I’d been holding.

The next two days passed in a similar fashion. Lucifer bringing me my three squares a day like a true prison and neither of us speaking a word. Day three however, I was fed up. So when he came to deliver my lunch I decided it was time to talk.

As soon as he entered the room I cleared my throat. He didn’t acknowledge me, but the tick in his jaw gave away that he’d heard me. “I want Bull.” I demanded crossing my arms.

He continued walking to the dresser where he placed my food down. “I. WANT. BULL.” I said a little more strongly and louder.

He grunted, how original. “And why do you think I give a flying fuck what you want? You think I fucking care about what it is you’re asking for? It was my mistake being nice to ya ass before but I won’t make that mistake again. You’re in no position to request shit fuck all in here and you’d do well to remember that.” He said walking to the door.

“So what? You expect me to do what you want? Please, pray tell what that may be?” I challenged.

“Eat your food, stay here, and keep your fucking mouth shut.” He said as he walked to the door.

I crossed my arms. “How about I don’t do any of those?” I asked.

He grunted. “I don’t give a shit.” Was his response as he left the room and locked me in.

I stormed over to the dresser and picked up the plate throwing it with all my might into the door. I watched the contents of the sandwich and the pieces of the plate hit the floor. I’ve been breaking a lot as of late it seems but there isn’t a guilty bone in my body. I dragged my body to the bed and collapsed onto it. I tucked myself under the covers and curled into a ball. I put on the T.V. and decided to drown out my issues with movies.

Lucifer returned to collect the dishes from lunch. I vaguely remember him coming in earlier and finding the mess that was my lunch. I heard him cleaning it up while cursing under his breath. I didn’t move a muscle and decided to ignore him. He was back around his normal time with dinner. I heard him enter and place food down on the nightstand by the bed. Again, I remained in the fetal position on the bed. Not making a sound or any attempt to move. He lingered for a bit longer than usual before the sounds of him leaving and locking the door followed.

I woke up the next morning hungry and aching. I probably shouldn’t have stayed curled up that way for as long as I had. I looked over to the nightstand and noted there was nothing there. He must’ve come back after I’d fallen asleep to collect the untouched food. I jumped into a steaming hot shower to try to soothe the aches in my body and put on a clean pair of pajamas. I knew it wasn’t smart refusing to eat, but as a testament to me not wanting to bend to his commands I would do what I needed to. I remembered that I kept me a small stash of snacks in one of the drawers and checked. Gratefully, the protein bars and cookies were still there along with a few other miscellaneous things I had kept in here in case he decided to seclude me in here again during my last stay. I took out a few pieces that I knew would sate my hunger and scarfed them down. When I was done, I resumed my place on the bed this time being careful to stretch out and became one with the television.

Breakfast time rolled around and nothing changed. He came in and placed down the food and left. The only sounds in the room were the T.V., his footsteps, and the sounds from the door. Once again, I refused to acknowledge or touch the food. I didn’t even spare it a glance afraid that I might cave. I’d snacked some more a while before I expected him to return with lunch. A movie that I’ve not seen in years came on just as he came into the room. I was engrossed with the opening scene that I wasn’t paying any attention at all to Lucifer. The next thing I knew his huge body was blocking my view of the television.

“Are you going to eat or am I wasting my time?” he asked.

I made sure to keep my face completely blank and looked into his face. He desperately needed a shave, but I’d be damned if that stubble didn’t look positively delicious on him. His hair was a mess almost as if he’d just finished running his fingers through his black soft curls. If I hadn’t known any better, I’d say he looked even more solid than he had before but I’m sure that was impossible. His broad shoulders and chest were massive completely blocking the 50 so inch T.V. and those eyes… my god. They were beautiful but cold. So cold, I had to fight the involuntary shiver threatening to take over my body. When I didn’t respond, and gave him nothing but my blank stare he placed the plate down on the bed directly in front of me.

I didn’t even look at it. “Fucking eat. I don’t know what fucking game you’re playing at but I don’t have time for this shit. You need to stop being a pain in my ass and just do as you’re told.” He said making his stance more intimidating.

Too bad his little speech pissed me off. Without looking down I used my knee to nudge the plate. His gaze zeroed in on my movements with narrowed eyes and watched as I ever so slowly pushed the plate off the bed letting it hit the floor.

A low growl escaped his throat and his body became rigid. “You know what? Fucking starve then for all I fucking care. I won’t bother bringing you shit.” He kicked the contents on the floor hard causing them to fly across the room. The plate smashed into the wall with brutal force and shattered. He stormed out the room, slamming the door, and locking me in. The sound of the lock clicking into place was louder than it’s ever been. It sounded more permanent in my ears almost as if it was never going to open again.

Dinner time came around and as promised he didn’t return. I wasn’t sure how to feel about that exactly. I won’t lie and say that I thought there was a chance he would just cut me off from food entirely. I mean I am pregnant… that’s the whole reason I’m here for god’s sake. I guess I pushed him too hard. I guess this didn’t mean as much to him as it initially appeared. It makes me wonder why he even went through all the trouble to find me and bring me here. It’s probably about power, I didn’t do as told and he was punishing me. Well, I was not going to make it easy for him. If I was going to starve in this room then I’d go out fighting.

I was beginning to doze off from exhaustion. My brain had been working overtime trying to figure out how my life has come to this and how to get myself out of it. Thinking wasn’t exactly a good thing when you have mostly bad thoughts. The door opened and I stiffened not sure what type of show it was going to be this time. I should’ve known he wouldn’t just drop my defiance.

“Sugar?”

My face broke out into a huge smile and I practically leaped off the bed. Bull stood just inside the doorway with a questioning look. I was so happy to see him I hadn’t noticed the bags in his hands as I jumped up and damn near tackled him with a bear hug. “Hi!”

He chuckled. “Well, that was one hell of a greeting. I take it you miss me?” He asked as I released him and he waggled his eyebrows.

I laughed. “You have no idea.” I admitted.

He smiled. “Well I missed you too, that’s why I had to come see you. You’ve been here how many days and I haven’t spent time with my favorite girl.”

My eyebrows rose. “Excuse me mister? You knew where I was, it’s not like I could’ve come see you.” I said accusingly.

He gave me a sheepish grin. “I uh… did ask but Lucifer told me fuck no and to fuck off and I decided not to push him. He finally granted me permission to come up here, but all that matters is I’m here now.”

I grunted. “Took long enough…” I said and he laughed. I turned to go sit back on the bed when the scent hit me. My mouth instantly watered. I didn’t need to look to know what he had so I spun back around pointing at the bags accusingly. “You didn’t?” I asked on a gasp.

“Oh, but I did. Not get your hot ass over on that bed so we can eat I’m fucking starved.”

I did as told and sat on the bed legs crossed waiting for Bull to follow suit. He kicked off his boots and climbed onto the bed with his back to the headboard facing me. I watched as he began unloading food from the bag. He passed me a container. I opened it eagerly and immediately dug in. Once I’ve devoured a good amount of the spaghetti I looked up to him.

“So how’d you know that I loved this place?” I asked.

“Uh…” he gripped the back of his neck nervously. “The truth sugar is I didn’t. Lucifer been pissed off all fucking day, like totally angry. I have no idea what the hell you did or said to the man but he was losing his shit. Then he just fucking disappeared, no words or anything. He pops back up with these bags and practically tossed them into my arms. He said I can come see you and that I take this with me.” My eyebrows shot up in wonder and Bull’s head cocked to the side in question. “I thought maybe you asked for this and he was reinstating the eating together rule again… but I guess that’s not the case?” he asked.

I sighed. “Well he’s been a total jerk to me.” Bull snickered. “No seriously, like really bad… worse than before. He told me that I was to stay here quiet and just eat and do what he says. I decided I wasn’t going to just let him do this to me so I refused to eat the food he brought to me.” I admitted.

Bull began laughing so hard he couldn’t speak. “Oh, that is classic. That sure would piss him off.”

I frowned. “I mean seriously though, why would that make him angry? It’s not like he actually cares. I feel like this whole thing is just some type of punishment for running away.”

When his laughter faded, he looked at me seriously. “Really, it sort of is. Babe, you know the man was full on fucking angry about you leaving. He still is, at least I think so anyway. Finding you and bringing you back didn’t cure any of those feelings. I don’t think he’d actually hurt you or some shit but if he can make you feel a drop of whatever the fuck is going on in that crazy fucking head of his he will.  If he didn’t give a shit about you or any of this then he wouldn’t be doing this. Look, you’re fucking being stubborn and defiant on purpose and those are two traits he can’t fucking stand… and what’s he do? Go out to wherever the hell this place is and got something that he knew you’d eat and set me up to bring it to ya to make sure you did.”

I rolled my eyes. I mean, what he said made sense I just couldn’t wrap my head around this. It just wasn’t the right thing to do to a person. “So what’s the likely hood I’m going to get out of this place, let alone this room?” I asked.

Bull scoffed. “I’ve not a clue sugar, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he put a chip or a tracker on you if he does let you out so he can find you.”

“Do you… do you think he’d really do that?” I asked with a shudder.

He shook his head. “Na, that’s not his style but then again if he thought you might disappear again…” he shrugged, “I don’t know what he’d do. When it comes to you, I can’t predict how far he’d go.”

“Why? Why me? Do you think it’s because I’m pregnant? Would he do this to any girl in this situation?” I asked.

“Sorry to burst your bubble babe but no. It sounds fucked up to say this but if this was some other bitch, let’s say Pearl… he would not want a baby with her. Fuck if there would be a way to kill the bitch that got pregnant and not hurt the baby he’d most likely take that route. He’s got issues and this is a sore spot for him.” He told me.

“Why what happened?” I asked.

Bull shook his head. “Not my story to tell. Now, I’m missing out on some drinking and fucking right now, but I’m in no rush to leave my girl. Now, put something good on this T.V. and we can cuddle and braid each other’s hair, yea?” he asked.

I smiled. I picked up the remote and crawled to sit next to Bull. I pulled the covers up over us and laid my head on his chest. He wrapped an arm around me securing me to him and I haven’t felt this safe in a while. He kissed the top of my head. “It’s going to be ok sugar, I promise.” I let his words wash over me and renew my hope. I don’t think it took nothing more than a few minutes for me to fall asleep.