Chapter 15

The beauty of a text message

 

“Hey, Kristy. Glad I caught you.”

“Whatcha got Nick? Kilby needs these cell phone records asap,” she said, stopping at my desk.

“Mike and I were just talking about security feeds at the bars being deleted,” I explained.

“What about them?”

“Can you pull where the bars stored their feeds? I’m looking for crossovers on any cloud servers.”

“Sure. It will take me about an hour. If I remember, all but two used offsite storage.”

“Thanks. ‘Preciate it.” Kristy hurried off in the direction of Kilby’s office, and I turned back to Mike. “How are your girls?”

“Doing okay. Janey is taking it the hardest. She called last night to complain about Donna’s new man. She graduates high school in a month and wants to come live with me over the summer before she leaves for college. I told her I’d love that; Donna pitched a fit. Once Catherine and Victoria heard the idea they wanted to come too, which led to the conversation about living with me during the week and staying with their mom on the weekends, to which Donna went postal and told the girls over her dead body.”

“Shit Mike. That’d be great, the girls living with you,” I told him.

“It would. I’d love it. But the truth is.” Mike stopped and looked at the ground and shook his head. “Donna might be a lot of things - a cheating bitch being one of them, but she’s a good mom. I know the girls are upset about the divorce. However, I don’t want them to lose their mom. They’ve always been tight; they’re teenage girls, they’re gonna need her more and more. Not that they don’t need me, but their momma is important. And trying to talk to Donna about the fact that her bringing a man around so soon is upsetting her girls is like talking to a brick wall. All she says is I’m jealous, then breaks out into a tirade of how I wronged her and all the things I didn’t give her, making everything my fault. I’m at a loss man. There’s no reasoning with the woman.”

“You’re a good dad.”

“I’d cut my arms off for those girls. From the minute Janey was placed in my arms, I knew my world had changed. There was this little girl that needed me for everything. Having kids is life changing man.”

I knew Mike was right. I’d watched all my uncles have kids; I’d seen first-hand how a tiny baby could bring the toughest man to his knees. I’d never thought about having kids of my own, not in any real way. Sure, I wanted them and figured one day I’d have them. But until Meadow, I’d never considered what that would be like, and biologically she couldn’t have any. I’d told her about Nolan and Reagan raising me, and I wouldn’t mind adoption. The words flew out without thought as soon as I saw her pain. However, as I laid in bed that night, I really considered what that would mean - not having a child of my own. The thought stung. The more I contemplated, I realized that was Meadow’s reality, and awareness kicked in. My heart ached for her. The way she told me she couldn’t have kids, with her eyes screwed shut like she couldn’t bear to have them open when she said the words, told me she’d wanted children. Not being able to have beautiful daughters with shiny red hair and green eyes made my insides hurt. However, I knew deep down, if I could convince her to take a chance with me, and Meadow and I went the distance, there was a child out there that needed us. A child I would welcome and love.

“I guess it would be.”

“I’m gonna run some of the doctors Joel and Ben found. You wanna grab some lunch in a few?”

“Another time? I’m gonna call Meadow and see if she wants to meet.”

“Ah, yes, the beautiful Meadow. How’d dinner go last night?”

Suddenly, gossiping like teenagers became more important than his reports. He sat on the corner of my desk waiting for details.

“I don’t know where to begin. It was eye-opening. I knew it was going to be an uphill battle getting close to her, but man, I didn’t expect World War three. She had some bullshit in her head about being filler,” I explained.

I was getting pissed all over again. After I left Meadow’s last night with a kiss and a promise to call soon, I replayed her words over and over. Filler? What the fuck.

“What the fuck is filler?” he asked, just as confused as I was when she told me.

“She says fillers are the women who men find when they’ve had enough sleeping around but aren’t ready to get married.” Mike chuckled. “What’s funny.”

“I’ve never thought about it that way, but she’s not wrong.”

“What the fuck! Meadow is not filler.”

“No, not Meadow. I get that. All I’m saying is I understand her logic.”

“I do too,” Joel added, joining our conversation. Christ. Were these two insane? There was no such thing as filler. I took a breath, trying to lower my blood pressure when Joel spoke. “I’m not saying her logic isn’t fucked up. No woman should ever call themselves filler, but I can track her thinking. Remember when I told you I knew Ellie was the woman I was going to marry the minute I saw her?”

“Yeah, but you waited two years to ask her out,” I answered.

“Right. Do you think I was a monk for two years? I wasn’t. I still dated, still slept around. I’m not bragging and not proud of what I did, but I was young. I knew myself, and I wasn’t ready for a long-term commitment. In the two years I dated other women, I knew I’d never fall in love with them, I would never offer them anything more than a few months. I already knew Ellie was it for me. I simply wasn’t ready for her.”

I thought about what Joel said, and I could understand what he was saying, but it was still jacked.

“So, you fucked other women knowing that the woman you wanted to spend your life with was right in front of you?”

“Yep. I knew I needed to get all the childish bullshit out of my system before I could go to Ellie as a man, not a boy. I was still at frat parties every weekend. I had to finish school, and yes, I had to sleep with other women. I’m not saying I was some sleazeball, but there were a few. If I hadn’t grown up and waited, I knew I’d wonder if I was losing out on the college experience, or if there was something I was missing. I know myself. I needed to be the man she needed because she deserved nothing less. Ellie is… everything. I never stopped watching and waiting.”

“Quite the chance you took. Ellie is a beautiful woman. You’re lucky someone else didn’t scoop her up,” Mike laughed.

“I was never worried. There was no way she could ever fall in love with someone else. Not when the connection we had was so strong. She needed to live and grow too. Besides, look at me, you think another man could stand a chance?”

Mike and I both laughed at Joel’s arrogance. He was a good-looking man, but Ellie? She was stunning and brilliant. Joel had definitely married up. Dr. Ellie Brinkley worked for the CDC here in Virginia.

“I’m not saying you think of her as filler, and I never thought of any of the women I dated that way. But her? Her self-esteem the way it is, I can see why she feels that way,” Joel added.

“I hate she feels that way. She told me about her hysterectomy. I didn’t tell her I already knew. That’s another thing, she feels like she has nothing to offer a man because she can’t have kids.”

“Adopt.” Mike shrugged, mirroring my thoughts.

“That’s what I told her She has options but can’t see past the fucking scar on her face. As if it matters - she’s still Meadow, and anyone that can’t see past it is a fucking fool.” Mike and Joel stood speechless staring at me with matching grins. “What?”

“I know I asked you this before, but are you sure you’re ready for her? A woman like Meadow isn’t looking for a quick romp,” Joel asked.

“I’ve had my fair share of women. I’ve never been a one-night stand kinda guy. I like knowing who I’m taking to my bed. But that’s not to say I haven’t done it. Am I ready to get married? Shit, I just met her, I can’t answer that. However, now that I know there is a Meadow Holiday out there in the world, I can’t stop thinking about her. I want to learn everything about her. Hell, I want her to know everything about me.”

“You’ve got your work cut out for you,” Mike noted, unnecessarily I might add. I’d already known, but last night nailed the point home. I was going to have to battle it out.

“Damn Boy Wonder, go big or go home, right?” Joel laughed.

“She’s worth it,” I told them.

“Then fight and don’t stop until you erase all the nonsense from her head. While talking about your lady love has been exciting, I got work to do. Mike, you coming?” Joel pushed away from our group and waited for Mike.

“Yeah, I’m coming,” he answered, then said to me, “dig in deep. Dig in so fucking deep she can’t get you out.”

I watched as the guys walked away and thought about what they’d both said. Mike was right. I was going to dig in so deep she’d never want to get me out.

I grabbed my phone and pulled up the messaging app, opened a new text box, and put my plan into action.

Me: Free for lunch?

I’d decided last night I wasn’t going to play games. I wanted Meadow, and there was no sense in fucking about. I didn’t need to play it cool and wait a few days before I reached out and set up another date - Meadow didn’t need that either. She wasn’t the type of woman that you kept waiting.

Meadow: Today?

Me: Yes. Today.

Meadow: You didn’t get enough of me being a blubbering mess last night? Are you a glutton for punishment or a closet masochist? FYI – I don’t know how to wield a whip.

Damn, she was funny.

Me: Lucky for you – I do.

There was a pause before my phone beeped. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath until I opened the message.

Meadow: I’m not sure if the flip-flop in my belly is because I should run and hide under my bed or if the thought of you with a whip is… exciting.

Any hope I’d had to control my erection flew out the window. Fuck. I wasn’t into whips and chains but the thought of pinkening Meadow’s ass with my palm while I took her from behind was certainly…exciting.

Me: I don’t think the guys would appreciate me walking around the office with a hard-on. Lunch? Can we continue to explore the option of leather goods over burgers? And just so you know – I’d find you if you ever tried to hide from me.

Meadow: Yes to lunch. No to talking about this in person.

Me: Why not in person?

Meadow: I can be brave over text. I can tell you things without having to look you in the face and have you see me embarrassed or shy. IDK. It’s stupid.

Damn. She was adorable.

Me: Fair warning, there will be a time when this topic will have to be discussed face to face. Not real keen on the thought of you texting me while I’m enjoying your body, to tell me how much you like what I’m doing. I’ll be there in 30 mins to pick you up.

As soon as I hit send I was a little worried my message was too crass, but when her response came back, she shocked the shit out of me.

Meadow: What’s the equivalent of a hard-on for a woman? Because I’m that!

Holy shit!

Me: Wet. Red, are you wet for me?

Meadow: It is too soon or forward if I say yes?

Me: Fuck no! I’ll see you in 28 mins. And just so you’re prepared, I plan on kissing the hell out of you today.

Meadow: Yippy! But don’t expect flirty Meadow when you get here.

I couldn’t stop the bark of laughter that escaped.

“What’s so funny?” Mandy asked as she passed my desk.

“Nothing,” I answered. Gauging the state of my dick, I decided I should stay seated with Mandy standing there.

“Are you blushing?” she teased.

“What? No.”

Was I? Shit!

“Your face is as red as your pretty woman’s hair,” she informed me.

Damn. A hard-on and I was blushing. What the hell was wrong with me? She’d turned me into a sixteen-year-old boy that couldn’t control his body’s responses.

“Did you need something? I’m leaving for lunch.” I didn’t mean to sound rude, but I couldn’t very well stand with Mandy there, and I wanted to get to Meadow.

“Nothing that can’t wait until you get back. I reviewed the session with Meadow and have some thoughts about our unsub. Find me later.”

“Will do.”

The last thing I wanted to discuss before seeing Meadow for lunch was the case, though the mention of the unsub and Meadow’s recorded session did wonders defaulting my rigid dick.

I waited for Mandy to walk away before I made my way out of the office. Once I was safely in the privacy of my car, I allowed my mind to wander back to Meadow’s text. She’d been turned on by our exchange. That was good to know; it gave me an idea how to ease her into a physical relationship. I’d never done it before, but I was a quick study. There was no doubt I’d pick up on the finer points of good old-fashioned phone sex in no time. My dick started to throb in my slacks at the mere thought of having Meadow touch herself at my command.