Chapter Eleven
Sarra
We arrived on Udora one day after my sexual rendezvous with my chosen – or whatever he was to me now. My body racked back and forth from loving him and choosing to believe he would be able to win me over with logic; from wanting to feel him inside me just to prove that things were as they used to be… to wanting him to suffer the pain he had caused me.
To my surprise, the area he had chosen to take me to was the old ruins. The crumbling buildings on the outskirts of the planet that he had once said were so important to him. I looked over the buildings and remembered just weeks ago now when he’d taken me here to meet Rerdig.
The stone buildings looked different somehow. Our ship was docked an hour’s walk behind us. As we approached a large stone home, I blinked in surprise and turned around to face Haden.
Our relationship had been strained, to say the least. We’d barely spoken after our encounter. My body was burning with heartbreak that my mind was still trying to convince my heart wasn’t true. How could this be reality when what we had seemed so real?
“It’s…” I exhaled.
“Sinking,” he nodded.
I stared into the distance as the stone houses that once seemed so regal and watched as they slowly seemed to melt away into the thick mud and moss below. “Udora is sinking. Half of it, anyway.”
I offered a deep frown and stepped farther into the mossy city. “I don’t understand. We were just here.”
“The buildings sink. We build over them.” He shrugged helplessly. “There are two cities buried underground here. Almost three, now. Old Udora.”
“What? Why is it sinking?”
“That’s a loaded question,” he warned.
I scowled at him and whipped around in the wet moss beneath us. “Isn’t that the point of all this? To be open and honest?”
He gave a sigh and walked around the beautiful field. The setting sun lit up the valley perfectly, highlighting the dew on the moss and the intricate carvings of the stone that lay ahead of us. The tilt on the buildings was so intense I could nearly feel them shifting, sinking through vibrations in the earth.
“Why don’t we know about this?” I asked, furiously turning to him. “We could have done something by now!”
“Because they don’t trust you.” He watched my expression of horror and gave a knowing nod. “Now you see my frustrations. I’m not looking to overthrow the Koth because I hate them,” he clarified. “But what they have created isn’t a real alliance. It’s bullshit.”
“How’s that?” I dared.
“If this were a real alliance we would have looked to you for help by now.”
“Okay, Haden, fair enough,” I said with a sigh. “Tell me then, what do you dislike about your Koth? What is so horrible that it must be changed?”
“To start, we have strict rules about the choosing ceremonies.”
My expression darkened as my eyes challenged him to continue. “Because, of course, shifters used to come and steal women. To treat them as property and force them into a life on Udora.”
“We took women for the same reason we do now.
I laughed in frustration. “Forgive me if the way we present it makes the women feel a little more at ease. Like we’re going to be loved and respected, or something.”
“My dear, sweet, perpetually intelligent Sarra,” he said and raised his hand toward me. “Aren’t you? Deception aside, which, by the way, I fully intended on telling you at some point–”
“Uh huh,” I rolled my eyes.
“Haven’t I shown you nothing but respect and love? Didn’t I tell you that shifters know who belongs to them the moment they meet? Shifters didn’t come down to steal women; we came down because we felt a connection. We feel as though your soul is bidding us to Earth.”
“Okay,” I said slowly. I thought on his words for a moment while turning back to the crumbling, wet buildings before us. I watched as dusk slowly approached, casting beautiful colors across the forgotten valleys. There was something romantic about his statement, sure, but there was something incredibly eerie about it as well.
“The choosing ceremonies have to stay,” I snapped.
“Fine,” he groaned. “The choosing ceremonies have their place, I’ll admit. Just know that it came as a bit of a shock to those of us who never used to have to submit to rules.”
“I am dismissing this complaint. Next!”
He laughed derisively and continued. “Alright, how about this: humans come to Udora to research our planet, and then they keep the research to themselves!”
“Hah!” I said, spinning around and pointing a finger in his direction. “Not true! In fact, we gave you
“And what did you keep?”
I felt my stomach flip, and I pursed my lips, still unsure how much I should share with the shifter who had won my heart and then stomped on it repeatedly. He was right. We’d taken antidotes for various illnesses and more and never even reported our work to the Koth.
“You use up our resources, for another thing.”
“Um, planets are made to be inhabited,” I scoffed almost in jest at the accusation.
“Not ours. Not at the rate you’re sending people. We have more people than we have farms and we’re losing resources quickly. The way of life you’ve shown us isn’t sustainable for Udora.”
“And the Koth acknowledge this?”
“Of course they do!” he shouted. “But do they care? No! Because they want the women. They want the power that the alliance brings.”
“But you don’t,” I exhaled and looked over at him, no longer afraid to show him my sadness.
He seemed to think on that and then his face fell. “I head the rebellion,” he admitted. I wasn’t shocked. It seemed perfectly reasonable that he was the one calling the shots, what with how Rerdig was handled. I blinked and expressed nothing at the sentiment.
Zaphira told me she believed the rebels had a spy in the Koth. I just didn’t assume it was him.
“We have a mole in the Koth,” I repeated from our earlier conversation.
“Right,” he nodded. “I remember.”
“He’s the one who told us he believed there were rebels looking to turn on the alliance with the Earth. That means he probably knows you’re the spy in the Koth.”
Haden went to say something but seemed to think better of it. The comment took him by surprise, and he raised his chin to his hand. “Haden, I do love you,” I finally admitted.
“And I love you,” he smiled.
I walked over to him and burst into sobs once more. “Please don’t do this,” I pleaded, throwing my arms around him in a desperate attempt to get him to back down. “Please,” I begged. “We can make this alliance better, I promise, but you can’t do this. You can’t throw away everything we’ve worked for.”
I looked up into his blue eyes and could feel my lip quivering uncontrollably, and he looked back down at me like a parent would to a child, grabbing my chin in his hand and smiling empathetically.
“Please,” I begged. “I’ll do anything to stop this war.”
“Okay.” I could feel him buckle under the weight of my tears. He wrapped his arms around me and gave a slow nod. “But I need something from you.”
I smiled weakly at him and relished the feeling of his hands brushing through my hair. “I hope it’s a kiss,” I joked sadly.
He shook his head, and the earth shook beneath us as the crown of a once glorious stone tower plummeted into the muddy, watery deep. The sudden suction caused a reverb that echoed through the valley with a sickening slurp. Haden looked at me with just as much surprise as I was sure was showing all over my face.
I swallowed, hard, and wondered how it was that the city began to sink so quickly.
"Do you know much of shifter legend?"
"Of course," I said with wonder. It was my job to study their species, to become familiar with what was important to them - to the extent that they would let us, anyhow.
"Then grab on," he insisted with a wry, sad smile.
Haden grabbed my hand softly and spread his wings before flying me into the air. The world looked so green from high up above. He stopped after just a minute or so and landed in at a curved set of buildings that seemed to stretch into a half circle in a bare field. The building was a castle or a fort of some kind, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it could be used for. There was a lot I didn't know, it seemed.
The curved fortress stood in front of a tall cliff and behind a great body of water that I'd never encountered on Udora before. The waters glowed with purple glowstones beneath their surface, and I felt my heart race with excitement at its beauty. Then suddenly the earth was showered with glowing rain.
The liquid seemed to carry a beautiful mist throughout the valley. Trees and greenery caked with the crawling Udorian moss were everywhere. And then there I was, soaking up the scenery like a sponge. Large flat rocks could be seen peeking out through the water’s edge, gorgeous from side to side, as the rain pelted down.
He walked us over to crystal-clear water with a striking view mountainous terrain near the back of the fortress. I heard nothing but warm, calm, serene sounds of falling of water as the rain found its way to our bodies. For all the times I had been shown Udora’s landscapes, this time felt different. It was soothing in a way I had never experienced before.
Haden’s footsteps drew nearer, and he set his hand on my leg as I sat down on a jutting rock near the water’s edge.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" he asked, and waited a moment for a response. When one failed to present itself, he began walking around the riverbank.
The hurrying dusk hid the vibrant colors of everything around us, but I couldn't stop staring at his blue eyes. I thought about what they looked like in the daylight; what they looked like when he told me he loved me. Crystal blue with jagged circles around the pupil; there were so many layers to how beautiful they were.
"Yes, it's beautiful," came my delayed response. At hearing my voice, he came back over to me and knelt down next to me. The rain poured, but neither of us moved.
Droplets of rain made their way down his deep skin, hitting the tip of his nose and causing a smile to settle on my lips.
“You were saying something about a legend?” I reminded him.
“Legend says that a pairing would consummate and create our final leader. The dragon who would lead us into prosperity, who would take over and–”
“Cast light over all the shadows,” I finished, albeit less poetically than Haden would have said the verse.
“Right,” he nodded. “The rebellion has looked into this, and we believe she’s arrived.”
“She?” I said with some surprise. Then my mind twisted back to those tapestries at the ball. They weren’t depicting the start of the shifter’s existence, I thought; they were depicting a golden age ruled by the female white dragon. My eyes went wide as I looked at Haden.
He gave a slow nod and pursed his lips. “I can feel it, Sarra. We all can. This is why the Koth is so stringent these days. They don’t want the Earth’s help with the sinking fields because this is where she is said to emerge. They don’t want her here.”
“So you’re not… looking to take over as much as you’re–”
“Paving the way for her to take over. But we have to find her first.”
“And…” I blanched, “what does that have to do with me?”
“I believe that you had a hand in hiding her.”
A grimace washed over my features, and his eyes chased mine. At that moment, I began to feel sick. I didn’t question his logic. In fact, I knew the exact incident he was speaking of.
“Nobody knows where they are,” I snapped. “Haden, I can’t.”
He raised his hand in dismissal. “Do you love me?”
“Yes.”
“Do you trust me?”
I thought on the question and then nodded. “Yes.”
“Then know what we feel this. As sure as I felt you, I feel that she is born. And it’s our job to find a way to bring her back to Udora, and I need you to tell me where the child is.”
I paled and listened to his request, but I knew I couldn’t do it. “Haden, I can’t, please. You can’t know that this is the child. When has there ever been reports of a female shifter? Never!”
“That’s how I know.”
I protested. “You don’t!”
He stepped close to me and leaned in for a simple kiss. As he backed away, he locked his eyes with mine and said, “Then ask. Ask Zaphira.”
“Because that’s not going to look suspicious,” I teased with a roll of my eyes.
“Don’t ask where they are,” he offered. “Just ask if it’s a girl.”
That was it then, I thought. My stomach twisted in directions I didn’t think possible. I looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity there. He had successfully made me afraid; made me question my loyalties. Just as he had promised to do.
So many of my soldiers and representatives from Riddell had followed Zaphira faithfully into the alliance with Udora with hopes of creating the most powerful alliance in the space sphere. Now Haden was saying that Zaphira was lying. That the alliance was going to break and it would be up to me to put a stop to a war before it could begin. If it were possible.