Sunny

My second day in Zeke’s hometown turned out to be pretty great, a whole heck of a lot better than I thought it would be. We’d hung with his folks for a while, then Zeke had shown me around, taken me to his favorite places, even told me a few stories, what he’d gotten up to when he was a little boy.

Afterward, we’d had dinner with his mom and dad again. As the evening drew on, I’d felt his eyes on me. In fact, they always seemed to be on me. I knew he wanted me. There was never any doubt of that. Just having that dark gaze on me did things, tingly, shivery, exciting things. This made it kind of awkward since we were with Zeke’s parents. I was also starting to think that perhaps he felt something more for me, that he had real feelings, that he might actually . . . love me.

I’d helped Jane with the dishes, while Zeke talked to his father, like he’d promised his mom. The “talk” must have gone well if Zeke’s mood was anything to go by.

So yes, my day had definitely been good, but so far my second night was waaay better.

I stared up at Zeke, my heart pounding faster at the look in his eyes as he pushed my hands above my head, pressed them into the mattress and thrust into me slow and deep. God, he hadn’t looked away since he slid inside me. It was intense. Almost too intense. One of my legs was over the back of his thighs, the other knee up high, my heel in the small of his back. Using him as an anchor, I lifted my hips to take him deeper, and the delicious feel of him stretching me even more was exquisite.

Zeke cursed, his hips grinding into mine. “Love watching you like this,” he muttered. “Seeing you so damn hungry for it.” He pressed his lips against mine and I moaned into his mouth. “Shit, love giving it to you, Sunshine.”

He picked up the pace after that, making it impossible for me to reply, even if I was capable of forming a coherent sentence, which I wasn’t. I clung tighter, my lips moving against his throat, licking sucking, biting.

He grunted. “Come on, Sunny, let me feel it.”

I didn’t need any coaxing, I was already there. I bit into his shoulder as it hit then released my hold on him with a scream. He lifted back up staring down at me, watching me, taking in the effect he had on me. I watched him back, watched the tension move through him, the controlled power of his body thrusting into me . . . until all that control snapped and he started fucking me hard and fast.

I watched it all, the way his face transformed right before he came, the way he looked at me like I was everything. I tried not to let myself read too much into it, of course, but the that look . . . it was intense, penetrating—God, beautiful, and I was starting to believe it.

No, I did believe it.

He came with a shout, dropping down on top of me, then rolled to his side, taking me with him. I curled in, held on, kissing, nuzzling his chest, his throat, unable to get enough of him. I just wanted to keep on touching him.

Gah! This whole thing was confusing as hell. But one thing I was sure of: I was utterly, desperately, hopelessly in love with him.

I listened to his heart beating. I still couldn’t believe he’d opened up to me on the way to his parents’ house, about how anxious he was about talking to his father tonight. How close they’d been, and despite what he said, still were. I knew this from the way they were together, the photos all over the walls of them camping and surfing and just hanging together as a family. But there’d also been a restlessness in him, a look in his eyes, that had been there since we arrived in Roxford, that I didn’t quite understand. Not with a family as close as this. But then I’d gotten the feeling Zeke was holding something inside him, something painful, from the first night I met him. The dreams had kind of cemented it for me.

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to get comfortable, tried to shut my mind down.

“Sleep, Sunny,” he said into the darkness. “We’ve got a long trip home tomorrow.”

Home.

Now there wasn’t a threat anymore, I wasn’t sure where home was.

* * *

As I walked across the bedroom, I realized my body ached, but in a very nice way. Memories rushed back, making me shiver. Zeke had reached for me several times during the night, and I had been only too happy to be the recipient of his attention. Each time he’d taken me, he’d held my eyes captive with his. I felt branded from them, owned.

I smiled.

He’d made love to me last night. There was no other way to describe it.

My smile grew wider.

The sun was bright and high in the sky and all I could hear were seagulls calling and waves crashing in the distance. I loved this place. I grabbed my nightie from the floor and tugged it back on, stole a pair of socks from Zeke’s bag, and pulled on his shirt from yesterday. It wasn’t that cold, but there was a slight chill in the air. I headed downstairs to find Zeke, get an idea of what time we were hitting the road. Our flight was booked for the afternoon, but I knew he’d want to go say goodbye to his folks. I almost expected to find him out surfing, but when I hit the ground level, I heard voices coming from the kitchen. I sneaked down the hall, since I was still in my nightie, to see who it was. Ron, Zeke’s dad, was here. Zeke was staring out at the ocean through the window, a pensive look on his face.

I was about to back up and leave them to it when I heard him say, “So you’re going to be a father?”

Zeke rubbed his hands over his face, then look over at his father. “Yeah.”

“How do you feel about that?”

My heart started pounding.

Zeke’s hands went to his hips. “The baby’s coming, doesn’t matter how I feel.”

His dad was quiet for a beat. “Do you love her?”

I held my breath.

Zeke’s wide chest expanded and he looked at his father. “I’ll give her what she needs, what they both need, that’s all that matters.”

“I know you will, I never doubted that for a minute, but that’s not what I asked you,” Ron said.

A pause. “I care about her.”

“But you don’t love her?”

He let out a rough breath. “I’m not . . . I’m not capable of that kind of love, not anymore.”

I grabbed for the wall, so I didn’t drop to the floor.

“I don’t believe that, son . . .”

“I’ve let enough people down on my life,” Zeke said. “In the worst way, I won’t let Sunny down as well. She and the baby, are my responsibility . . .”

His responsibility.

I felt ill.

“Does she know that’s how you feel?” Ron asked.

“She doesn’t need to know. I’ll provide for our child, I’ll be faithful to her, that’s all that matters.”

Ron shook his head. “You’re wrong.” He took a step closer to Zeke and touched his shoulder. “She deserves more than that and so do you . . .”

I stumbled back, pain so excruciating it robbed me of breath. He didn’t love me. I was nothing but a responsibility, a way of atoning for guilt he carried around over some other transgression. I couldn’t be that for him. I wouldn’t. Zeke walked away from his dad, heading toward the beach, and I spun and raced back up the stairs to the room before Ron saw me.

I paced the bedroom. I guess I finally had my answer. I was going it alone. Nothing new there. Sadness tried to rush forward, but I shoved it back. There was no time for weakness, I had to be strong. I could not falter. I’d allowed a stupid fantasy to take hold and now I was paying for it.

I spun toward my bag, I needed to get the hell out of here. Now.

I didn’t know how long Zeke would be gone, so I tore around quickly packing my things. There was no way I could face him after that, after the nights we’d spent together here. No, it wasn’t his fault he didn’t love me, but I couldn’t spend another minute with him and not fall to pieces. I heard Ron leave and I snatched up my phone, searching cab companies. I ordered one, and quickly dressed.

I rushed downstairs fifteen minutes later, right as the cab pulled up. I reached for the door . . .

“Sunny?”

No. No, no, no. I spun to face Zeke and backed up a step. “I have to go.”

He frowned. “What’s going on?”

I frantically shook my head. “I have to leave. Now.”

His frown got deeper. “Okay. Let me get my stuff and we’ll head out.”

“No, I have to go.”

“What are you . . .”

“I heard,” I rasped. “I heard you and your dad talking.”

He jerked back and a muscle in his jaw jumped. “Let me explain . . .”

“There’s nothing to say, is there?”

He strode forward and I tried to back up farther. My back hit the door and he slid his fingers around my wrist. “There are things,” he said. “Things you don’t know about me . . .”

“I love you,” I said.

His entire body went rock solid. “What?” he choked.

I started shaking. “You heard me.”

“Sunny . . .”

I put up a hand, stopping him. “I love you and you don’t love me back. I never meant for it to happen. I never meant for any of this to happen. But it did . . . and I can’t . . . I can’t be here, I can’t be in the same room as you knowing you don’t want me . . . that you don’t want us, after everything we’ve shared, and not break . . .”

His fingers tightened and he cursed. “No, you’re not going.” His eyes bore into me. “I won’t let you . . . not like this.”

Not like this.

That was all he had. That was it.

“Let me go,” I whispered.

“Sunny . . .”

“Let me go,” I repeated.

“No . . . you can’t . . .”

“Let me go!” I screamed and yanked on my arm.

His hold loosened then he released me, pain slicing through his eyes. I didn’t want to see it, I didn’t want to care. I sure as hell didn’t understand it. And right then I refused to even try. My heart was broken and I would not look into those shattered dark eyes and try to read more into it, to even attempt to understand what he was thinking.

He didn’t love me, that’s all I could focus on.

I grabbed for the door and pushed it open. “Just . . . I want you to stay away from me.” Then I grabbed my bag and rushed to the waiting cab.