Chapter Twenty-seven

EMILY

“Emily,” someone said. “Are you awake?”

I stirred and blinked my eyes open, yawning at the same time. Several seconds passed before I remembered where I was. It was the hospital, and a quick glance at phone told me it was Thursday morning.

The doctor stood in front of me, a concerned look on his face.

“I’m awake,” I said, shrugging. “Sorry. I was up all night.”

He nodded. “I understand your concern for your daughter, but the best thing you can do is make sure you take care of yourself as well.”

He glanced at Juniper and then back to me. It was obvious from the look on his face that he had bad news he was trying to figure out how to deliver.

My stomach knotted, and I swallowed. All night long, Juniper had woken up, coughing and wheezing. They’d given her more antibiotics and other medicines, and when I asked them what they were doing, they told me not to worry and that everything would be fine.

I didn’t need to be a doctor to see that my daughter seemed to be getting worse, not better.

“Just spit it out,” I said. Looking down, I sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be rude. I know something’s wrong. Please just tell me what it is.”

“Her blood work has worsened,” the doctor said. “Along with some other things. I’ll be honest. She had a really bad night.”

“I know. I saw it.” I sighed and rubbed my temples, doing my best to put on a brave face. When Juniper woke up, I couldn’t let her see fear on my face. “So where do we go from here? She’s got pneumonia from strep. You can handle this, right?”

The doctor held up his hand. “Don’t worry. We have the situation under control.” He lowered his hand. “We’re changing medications. These are third-line antibiotics that should help handle the underlying infection. We’re confident this will improve things, but Juniper will need to stay in the hospital for at least two more days. We’ll know by tomorrow if the new medications are working. If everything goes well, we might be able to discharge her by tomorrow night.”

I nodded slowly and didn’t say anything. The doctor continued to explain about Juniper’s condition, but I could barely hear him over the thumping of my heart.

Even though he said she might get better just as quickly, it was hard to believe him. I thought when we’d entered the hospital that she’d maybe spend a night there, and now she was getting worse. The chance that we’d be having an even scarier conversation the next day was way too high for me to be comfortable.

The strep hadn’t seemed like that big of a deal on Monday, just something that basic antibiotics could handle. Her admission to the hospital had scared me, and now I was downright terrified. No mother wanted to hear that her daughter’s condition worsened while she was sitting in a hospital surrounded by nurses and doctors.

If they couldn’t help her, then who could? This was the best children’s hospital in Nashville.

“Do you understand what I’m saying?” the doctor said, cutting through my thoughts. He frowned slightly as if he knew I hadn’t been paying close attention to him.

Unfortunately for him, I was too worried to care about if I was being rude.

I offered him a nod. Even if I hadn’t been paying attention, I understood enough. Either the new treatment would work, or my daughter would get even sicker. My stomach churned at the thought. I wouldn’t even let myself think about the worst-case scenario.

“Thank you for everything,” I said. “I really appreciate what you’re doing for my daughter.”

“We’ll make sure she gets better soon, Emily.” With a final nod, he headed off.

 

* * *

 

For a place where people needed to be awake, the coffee in the cafeteria was terrible. It was like someone was trying to make sure the employees didn’t drink it.

Sadly, after a mostly sleepless night, I needed something to keep me up, so I kept sipping at the awful swill. Mama was up in the room spending some time with Juniper while I had a little breakfast. At least the sausage and fruit were better than the coffee.

As I sat there drinking coffee and eating melon and sausages, I wondered how Juniper had even ended up in the hospital. Strep wasn’t something that lingered for a long time before symptoms showed. That suggested she’d been infected when she was staying with Lionel.

I knew it was pointless to ask him about it again, but the thought burned me. It probably had something to do with his new girlfriend, and as bad it was, I hoped he ended up sick too, so he could at least have to deal with some of the same pain.

I considered that might be unfair. She could have picked it up from a kid at school. There was a kid at her old daycare who was a strep carrier. The kid never got sick, but he also kept infecting other kids. Fortunately, Juniper never got sick. Until now.

Maybe it was a kid from her school. Maybe it was someone else. That didn’t change my feelings about Lionel.

I couldn’t believe the way he’d acted when I called to tell him. He acted like I was inconveniencing him. It wasn’t exactly hard to plan a trip to Mexico, and the fact he didn’t even seem to care that his daughter was in the hospital confused and angered me.

I munched on a sausage link. I was so sick of Lionel. When we’d divorced, I agreed to joint custody only because I thought it’d be good for Juniper. She needed to understand that we’d gotten divorced because of adult problems that had nothing to do with her, but now I felt like Lionel cared more about annoying me than about his daughter.

If that was what things had been turned into, things needed to change. Juniper still only understood love, and I wouldn’t let her be poisoned by hatred, either my own or his.

Maybe we would need to reconsider the custody situation. I didn’t mind him having girlfriends, but I did mind him exposing my daughter to him constantly switching women. She needed a stable environment for both parents, and Lionel’s jailbait of the month habit wasn’t providing that.

How did love and marriage turn into something so awful? Lionel’s accusation that I was selfish still stung.

The truth was no matter how angry I felt about him cheating and the drugs, I’d spent the last two years questioning if I was the problem. I couldn’t bring myself to say I should have never married him. I loved Juniper too much to think that, but I still questioned every other choice I’d made during the marriage.

No. I couldn’t let myself start thinking that way. He cheated on me, and I wasn’t frigid. I wasn’t the selfish one.

He was the selfish one who somehow always managed to make me question myself and make himself the victim. An adulterer as the victim. Mama was right. We might all be sinners, but he was the cheater.

Whatever I did, I needed to make sure it was the best thing for Juniper, and it was so hard to sort out my own feelings from my concerns over her. For now, I’d not worry about it until she was out of the hospital. It wasn’t like I could start a major legal battle with Lionel with my daughter still in a bed with an IV in her arm.

I sighed. Men were just too much trouble.

 

* * *

 

I smiled down at Juniper as she started snoring lightly. Mama had already headed out, and I’d finished reading one of her favorite bedtime stories. I figured it was just as good for a daytime nap as nighttime.

I wasn’t sure if she’d be able to get to sleep with all her coughing, but at least now she seemed to be getting some rest. Peaceful, if only for a little while.

My own eyelids were more than a little heavy. I didn’t even know if I could claim I’d gotten any real sleep the night before. My body ached, and exhaustion clouded my brain. There was only so much the awful hospital coffee could do.

Juniper’s pale face and sweaty head showed how much her illness was taking out of her. I pulled out a handkerchief from my purse and wiped her forehead with a sigh.

I hoped that the new medicine would kick in soon, but I figured it’d take more than a few hours. From what the doctor said, we’d know sooner than later.

My phone buzzed, and I pulled it out of my purse, praying it wasn’t Lionel. I couldn’t take his crap at that moment, and I doubted he’d suddenly developed a conscience.

To my relief, it was Logan.

I swiped to open my phone. “Hello,” I said quietly.

“I wanted to stop by, but I’m stuck in meetings for most of the day.”

“You really don’t have to.”

“I know, but I want to.”

I smiled. “That’s very sweet of you.”

“How is Juniper doing? Has she built a LEGO Eiffel Tower already?” He chuckled.

I nibbled my lip for a moment, wondering if I should downplay the truth. It might not be fair to worry Logan. Juniper wasn’t his daughter, and he had his company to worry about. Still, I was touched he called.

I exhaled slowly before speaking. “The doctor said things got worse last night. They are using a different medicine. Stronger.”

“Damn.” I could hear tapping for a few seconds before he spoke again. “Do you want me to arrange transportation to a different facility? I don’t know who to contact right off, but I have people who can help me with the right referrals.”

This was the difference between being merely wealthy and being a billionaire. I’d grown up in a household with plenty of money, but the idea of sending someone out of the hospital while doctor shopping wasn’t something that ever occurred to either Mama or me.

I waved my free hand by reflex, even though he couldn’t see it. “No, no. That’s okay. The doctors seem like they know how to deal with what’s going on.” I let out a long sigh. “We’ll just see how she is by tomorrow.”

“I’ll make some arrangements, just in case.”

“I really can’t ask you to do that. It’s too much.” Maybe I should have rejected the offer more firmly, but the worry about Juniper getting worse wouldn’t leave my head.

“Don’t worry. I’m happy to do it. If we don’t need it, then we don’t need it, but it doesn’t hurt to be prepared. I only want to make it clear I’ll do what it takes to make sure Juniper is healthy.”

I slapped my free hand over my face to stifle my gasp.

“What was that, Emily? I didn’t hear you.”

I removed my hand. “I-I was just saying thank you, Logan. I’m going to take a little nap. I had a long night, and I’m exhausted.”

“Okay, I’ll talk to you later. Let me know if you need anything else.”

“I will. Goodbye.” I hung up.

Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn’t understand it. Logan was so sweet, not only to me but also to Juniper. He didn’t have to stop by; he didn’t have to make the offers. I knew it was an inconvenience, especially since we weren’t in a relationship. I’d made sure of that in Tokyo.

Meanwhile, Juniper’s daddy couldn’t be bothered to skip the beach for his kid in the hospital.