CHAPTER 34

Ruth

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MOM AND I HAVE been spending our free time going to the movies and hanging out when she’s home, but Lucy likes to stay gone. This is the first time I’ve seen my sister all summer. It’s partly my fault, too. I’ve been with Josh.

“She promised she’d start trying to call more,” Mom says, sitting next to me on our couch. She’s wearing her nicest dress, a dark purple floral that hides her midsection and large thighs under a flaring skirt. Her hair has been cut into a chin length bob, and her curls are actually styled not frizzy.

“Is she? Calling more?”

“A little. She’s trying.”

“At least she’s here now.”

One of Mom’s professors owns a fancy Chinese restaurant and invited our family to eat for free. Lucy agreed to come, but only if she could bring her friend Dani. We’ve been waiting for them to get ready.

“What is taking them so long?” I throw my head back and stare at the ceiling with impatience. “It’s been like half an hour.”

“She’s plucking her eyebrows.” Mom gets up to check. She tries the bathroom door, but it’s locked. “Hey.” She knocks gently. “You guys almost done. We’ve got to go.” I watch her check the clock for the tenth time, and her worry wrinkles slowly deepen. “Luce?” she tries again.

“What!” Lucy shouts through the closed door.

“You almost ready?”

The door stays closed. “Fucking chill out. We’re coming.”

Defeated, Mom makes her way back to the couch. “She’s in a mood.” Mom sighs and shakes her head. “Maybe this isn’t a good idea.”

“It’s fine,” I say, digging through my purse for lipgloss. “We don’t have reservations right? We get there when we get there.”

“I know, but I was planning on introducing you to someone. He’s meeting us there.”

“What?” I ask, my voice elated with interest. I smile at her, and her worried grimace cracks a bit. “Like who?”

“Like someone I’ve been seeing.”

“Oh my gosh!” We giggle like she’s one of my teenage girlfriends. “Okay. Lucy needs to get it together. How long does it take to pluck eyebrows?” I stand and charge toward the bathroom. “You have five minutes or we’re leaving.”

Dani opens the door, her large brown eyes topped with tiny dark lines hardly recognizable as eyebrows. Through the crack I see Lucy five inches from the mirror, plucking hers into oblivion. The skin beneath is flushed red.

“What are you doing?” I ask, mortified by the obsessive way she’s destroying her face.

She turns away from the mirror. “Leave me the fuck alone.”

“Okay, well, we’re leaving. You’re being a real bitch.”

She lunges at the door, her body tense, and lifts her fist threateningly. “I’ll fucking punch you in the face.”

I flinch away startled, honestly afraid she’s going to hit me. Dani’s hand to her arm diffuses the crazed look in her eyes. “Let’s just go,” Dani urges.

“Fine,” Lucy seethes.

I have no idea why she’s so pissed, but I already can’t wait to not see her again for who cares how long. No matter how many times I try to tell myself she’s good, she always proves me wrong. I’m convinced she was born without a conscience.

I follow the two girls to our car, giving Mom a look. They’re wearing twin outfits. Cut-off shorts that are rolled up so high you can see their butt cheeks and tank tops made for five-year-olds. It’s embarrassing.

Unfortunately for Mom and I, the restaurant is very small, which means we are noticed. Quiet couples dressed in suit jackets and nice dresses gawk at Lucy and her friend in their booty shorts as we make our way to a table off to the side.

The two of them don’t belong here amidst the gleaming marble floor and delicate red paper lanterns. They talk too loud, and cuss, snort-laughing uncontrollably at stupid jokes.

I try hiding behind the menu hoping to somehow separate myself from them while Mom focuses on trying to find her mystery guest.

She cranes her neck. “I texted him we were going to be late. Maybe he’s not here yet.”

I peek around my menu to help her look, but the effort is interrupted by a sound so disgusting it makes me gasp in surprise.

Lucy continues the guttural hawking of mucus from the back of her throat without noticing my reaction.

“Lucy,” I hiss at her. “Stop that.”

It doesn’t really matter, people have already been staring this whole time, but I’m flushed with red-hot humiliation.

“What?” she asks, as if she has no idea what I’m talking about.

“That gross snot sound. Stop it.”

She ignores me to keep talking to Dani, but Mom has abandoned her search to look at me, as if silently asking me how to proceed with things.

She does it again.

“Lucy!”

“What?” the level of irritation in her voice is rising, and I’m so tempted to take the bait, but I don’t want to cause a fight.

“Can you guys just go wait outside until the food comes?” I ask nicely. Thankfully she agrees without arguing.

“I need a cigarette anyway,” she says.

As the place returns to its normal hum and rhythm, I watch Lucy outside the adjacent window. Her butt is pressed up against the glass, and she shamelessly smokes in public, even though she’s clearly underage.

“So you’re just letting her smoke now?” I say to Mom without looking at her.

“You act like I have any control over what she does. You know I don’t.”

A young Asian waitress comes over to take our order. Mom’s too distracted, scanning the restaurant for the fifteenth time, so I just order a bunch of things for everyone to share. She hardly notices.

“Where is he?” she asks the universe.

As I turn to look at the door, a man enters.

“There. That’s him,” she scoots her chair back and goes to meet her date.

It feels strange to watch her approach another man in an intimate way. He has flowers for her. She’s all smiles.

Something is familiar about the man. I try and figure out how I know him as they make their way toward me. The two of them seem to match the way most couples do, they’re both overweight but have equally gorgeous facial features that forgive the extra pounds.

“Ruth, this is Art.” Mom takes a breath and holds it in, waiting for my reaction.

Things start to connect. “Wait...” I say, “from...” the police raid. For some reason it feels rude to say the words.

“Sorry I didn’t make a very good first impression.”

I force a smile, feeling slightly uncomfortable as our food comes.

“So your mom tells me you’re into theater. Are you doing any shows?”

Mom is scooping orange chicken onto her plate, but mine stays empty. I’m busy watching Lucy smash the butt of her cigarette into the concrete, remembering the last time she encountered this officer.

Fuck you, Mendoza. I think those were her last words to him before they shoved her into their police cruiser.

My heart is starting to hum with panic at the idea of conflict.

“Hey Mom, can I talk to you for a second?”

I’m too late. What was she thinking bringing us to a public place to do this?

Lucy is already headed back to the table. She stops dead in the center of the restaurant, trying to figure out what’s going on. Her face is a hard mask of hatred.

“What. The. Fuck.” It’s not a question, but an accusation. “What are you doing here, Mendoza?”

“Lucy, this is Art. He’s not on duty—”

“I don’t give a shit.” She looks Mom in the eye for the first time all night. “You need to leave,” she says to Mendoza.

He puts his hands up in surrender. “All right. All right.”

“No,” Mom says. “Lucy, you can’t talk—”

“He’s a murderer. But I guess he didn’t tell you that.”

The whole restaurant is quiet and everyone is openly staring at us.

“Let’s just go, Mom,” I whisper.

Mom looks at Art with apologetic eyes.

“It’s okay,” he tells her. “I’ll call you later.”

He kisses her on the cheek and passes the judging faces as he exits the restaurant.

“I’m sorry,” Lucy says, but the tone of her words is hardly genuine. “He’s a piece of shit—”

“Stop it. Just stop.” Mom’s teeth are gritted in anger, her face stern with rage. “Get some to-go boxes,” she barks at me.

I jump up and do as she says.

The whole ride home, all of us keep quiet and make a point to scowl out our respective windows.

When we get inside, Lucy’s soft apologetic words surprise me.

“Mom,” she says, and a glimmer of the sweet sister I used to know shines through. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you, but he’s not a good guy. Do you know who he is? He is a murderer. He killed Gabe’s brother. He didn’t tell you that? Of course he didn’t.”

“This has to stop, Lucy.” Mom is sitting blank-faced at the kitchen table, her voice stripped of all tenderness. “Your behavior is out of control. You’re grounded. And I’m taking off your bedroom door. You need to learn to respect people. To respect me.”

I feel like I’m deciding how to defuse a bomb, only I have no idea which wire to cut. I just stare at the two of them trying to figure out whose side I’m on.

Lucy looks hurt, but I know Mom’s words won’t go unpunished. It doesn’t take long for her to laugh it off. “Fine,” she says. “Fuck you guys. I’m out of here. I don’t need you.”

“Did you hear what I said?” Mom challenges her. “You’re grounded.”

Lucy shakes her head and smiles like a lunatic. “What are you going to do? Go ahead. Call your boyfriend. You think I don’t know how to hide from the cops? You’re lucky if I ever come back. Come on Dani.”

She yanks her friend by the hand and slams the front door behind her.