Chapter Eleven

BRYCE

What kept surprising Bryce about this unexpected encounter was the intimacy. More than the sex – did blowjobs count as sex? Had they had sex? It didn’t matter. What mattered was how right it felt to be holding Dakota and talking to him like this with no barriers.

He felt like there wasn’t any part of him he had to hide. Dakota would understand his past relationship issues, wouldn’t worry that Bryce couldn’t take care of him, and didn’t judge him for the years spent repressing and denying what he’d felt.

Now that the blinders were off, it was as if he were watching the movie of his life through completely different eyes. Now the way he felt around other players and some of the coaches, that confusing mix of envy and fascination, made more sense.

It wasn’t that he was jealous of their bodies or intimidated by their general awesomeness. He just had a crush. How had it never occurred to him that guys could have crushes on other guys?

He could tell this was going to take a lot of processing. This revelation was only the start of a long emotional journey he’d have to take. No wonder he had let Nikki down. He hoped his mother wouldn’t be disappointed in him.

Saying some of the crap on his mind right now would be a good first step. He shifted Dakota, tucking the other man better under his arm. He hoped Dakota didn’t mind being treated like a teddy bear, but Bryce had never lain like this with anybody so big before. He couldn’t get over how comforting it felt.

Dakota’s hair tickled his nose, and he had a strong urge to drop a kiss on the top of his head. But that felt too intimate, too sweet. That kind of a gesture belonged in a real relationship, not a roadside hookup.

Dakota poked him in the stomach. “Damn, you’re like a fucking rock everywhere, aren’t you?” He ran his fingers over Bryce’s chest and stomach like he had been doing ever since they lay down. It was as if he couldn’t help himself.

Bryce knew he had a great body and he was used to people admiring it, but knowing that it turned Dakota on was the hottest thing that had ever happened to him. Dakota’s surprisingly soft skin and long, lean body were turning him on again.

“Okay,” Dakota said. “What could a hot, buff, pro-athlete with what I’m going to assume is a crap-ton of money in the bank and adoring fans have to hide? Besides the obvious, of course.”

The mocking edge in Dakota’s voice eroded some of Bryce’s feeling of safety. Damn it. But Dakota wasn’t wrong. By most yardsticks, Bryce did have it all. He tried to laugh it off. “Well, when you put it that way, now I just feel like an idiot whiner.”

Dakota pushed himself up with a hand on Bryce’s chest and looked him in the eye. “No. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. That was me feeling sorry for myself and being a dick to you. Please. Talk. I promise to listen and not judge.”

Dakota scratched his fingers through Bryce’s beard. “I’ve been wanting to do that since you first got out of the car.”

Bryce tilted his chin to give Dakota more access. “Feels good. I’m probably going to shave it, though. Maybe cut the hair. I feel like I need a change.”

“Hmm,” Dakota hummed in agreement. “You do what you have to do.” He ran his thumb lightly across Bryce’s lips. “I’m sure you’ll be devastatingly handsome either way.”

Bryce tentatively reached out to cup Dakota’s cheek in his hand. “I don’t know the protocol for this kind of thing –”

Dakota cut him off and pretended to pull something out of his pocket. “Hold on, let me check the handbook.”

“Does that come with the gay card?” Bryce combed his fingers through Dakota’s hair, careful of the knots.

“You should get it in the mail in six to eight weeks. Call 1-800-BLOW ME if you don’t.” He rubbed his head against Bryce’s hand like a big cat.

“Are you done?”

Eyes closed in pleasure, Dakota nodded.

“Can I kiss you again, now?” Bryce asked with exaggerated patience.

“Absolutely.”

Bryce kept his hand cupped around the curve of Dakota’s cheek and pulled him forward.

Dakota kissed him like they’d done it a million times before and had a million more to look forward to. His lips were soft as he pushed his tongue insistently into Bryce’s mouth. His hands made their way back into Bryce’s hair, and he hummed appreciatively.

Arousal built slowly through Bryce’s body as they kissed, less urgent than his first surge of lust, but richer. His cock stirred, and he rolled onto his side, reaching for Dakota.

Dakota smiled against his lips, then pulled away. “Let’s make a deal. You tell your secrets, I’ll tell you mine, and then we can get in some more practice on being gay for you. How’s that sound?”

“Sounds perfect.” Bryce settled back down on the bed. Dakota slipped right back into his spot under Bryce’s arm like he belonged there.

“I haven’t told anyone else this. Are you ready?” Bryce asked.

“Hit me.”

Bryce inhaled, and then let it out.

“I think I want to quit hockey.”

He waited for Dakota to tell him he was crazy. That he was selfish for walking away from all that money his family could use, for abandoning the team.

The silence stretched.

“Oh. Is that it?” Dakota asked.

Bryce laughed in a mixture of disbelief and relief. He’d forgotten that the thing that was his whole life was not even a blip on some people’s radar. ‘Quitting hockey’ carried with it implications Dakota had no way of knowing.

“My contract is up this year. The new one they’re offering is for twelve million dollars. Before bonuses. Then there are endorsement deals I might lose if I retire.”

He didn’t bother telling Dakota that those numbers were actually lower that what he’d gotten in his first front-loaded contract when he had been just eighteen. The older he got, the more giving teenagers millions of dollars to play with sounded like a terrible idea.

“Holy shit.” Dakota’s arm tightened around him. “Wow. I take it back. That is a lot to think about it. Why would you leave?”

Bryce shook his head. “Lots of reasons. That’s a much longer conversation.” Bryce nudged him. “Now you go.”

“Don’t you want to talk about any of it?”

“Nope.” He really didn’t. There was nothing he could do about any of his problems right this second, and it seemed like a waste of time to be talking. “Now you.”

Dakota rolled onto his back and threw his arm over across his eyes. “Mine’s bad.”

“No judgement. I promise.”

“How can you say that? You don’t even know what I’m going to say. Maybe I killed someone.”

By the look in his eyes, Bryce could tell Dakota wasn’t joking. Whatever his secret was, it was important to him. “No visible judgmental reaction. How’s that?” He doubted very much that Dakota had killed anyone. Everything else could be fixed.

“Fine.” Dakota rolled onto his back, and threw his arm across his forehead. “My ex-boyfriend embezzled from the guy who is — was — let’s just say my boss. It’s more complicated than that. But Kyle stole thousands from him and it’s my fault so I’ve been paying it back without anyone knowing.”

“Okay.” Bryce let that process for a few seconds. “Does your boss know about the embezzlement?”

Dakota shook his head.

Bryce probably should let it drop. His questions were violating the spirit of their agreement. Dakota didn’t strike him as stupid, but so much of what he had said didn’t make sense. “Do you think you should tell him?”

“He’s dead.” Dakota’s voice said quite clearly that the discussion was over.

Their conversation had gotten much deeper than Bryce had expected. Maybe the smart thing to do now would be to leave, for them to go their separate ways and figure out their lives.

But Bryce couldn’t do it. He couldn’t just walk away while Dakota was feeling so bad. Besides, he was the one who started them down this road. Hoping he wouldn’t be rebuffed, he rubbed soft circles on Dakota’s stomach. His hand looked large against the pale expanse of skin. “Hey. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

He stretched his fingers to see if he could span the narrowest part of Dakota’s waist. Not quite. But dragging his hand lower, he found he could touch both of his hip bones at the same time.

Dakota’s jeans were still unzipped from before and Bryce could just barely make out his soft cock resting against the soft nest of dark blond hair. He licked his lips at the memory of that cock harder and blood-hot in his mouth.

Dakota grunted softly and reached down to touch Bryce’s hand. “Fuck.” He covered the hand with his own. “I’m sorry. You shouldn’t feel bad because I’m a dick. You don’t need to hear my issues.”

Bryce rubbed his thumb back and forth along the ridge of Dakota’s hipbone, admiring the contrast of his darker skin against the light. “Well, I did ask.”

Dakota laughed. “Yeah, you did. Asshole.”

Bryce huffed a laugh, and then dragged his hand downward. They both watched as he trailed his thumb and pinky along the cut of Dakota’s hips until his palm covered Dakota’s cock.

Dakota inhaled through his teeth, cock twitching under Bryce’s hand.

“You said something about more practice?” Bryce asked.

“Oh, fuck yeah,” Dakota breathed. “What did you have in mind?”

Bryce gripped Dakota’s hip and tugged him onto his side. He slid his hand down Dakota’s jeans, feeling another man’s ass for the first time. Everything was the first time. He felt like a nervous teenager again.

He dug his fingers into the hard muscle, and Dakota clenched his ass, rolling his hips against Bryce.

“I want to touch you more. Everywhere. Get my mouth on you. And then I should probably work on my blowjob skills. Practicing basic skills is very important, you know. You have to build up that muscle memory.” He shoved his hand further down the curve of Dakota’s butt cheeks until his fingers grazed the crease where thigh met ass.

“Excellent game plan, coach. Sign me up. Let me make it easier on you.” He rolled onto Bryce until he was completely on top, his hands braced on either side of Bryce. “Now kiss me,” he ordered.

So Bryce did. And what did you know? Practice really did make perfect.