Gina agreed to meet me at a coffee shop on the East Side of Providence. Bouncing my knees up and down and surrounded by Brown University students and their MacBooks, I sipped my coffee and anxiously awaited her arrival. The only thing pleasant about this was the smell of cinnamon wafting from the baked goods shelf.
I hadn’t told Gina the exact reason for my wanting to speak with her. All I’d said was that I had some information that she might be interested in, making it seem like meeting me would provide some benefit in regards to her case against the hospital. I feared she might not have come if she knew the real reason I needed to confront her.
When she appeared, I waved to her from my seat in the middle of the packed café. She lifted her index finger then pointed to the counter to signal that she was going to order something before joining me.
Five minutes later, Gina placed her coffee down on the table and sat across from me. Her chair skidded.
“What did you want to see me about, Dr. Hogue?”
Needing to cut to the chase, I came right out with it. “My girlfriend is Bridget Valentine—Ben’s wife.”
Gina froze in the middle of sipping her coffee. Her expression turned to one of fear. She slowly nodded but said nothing as I continued.
“I was dragged into the deposition because I happened to be on shift in the ER the night of your accident. I didn’t know Bridget then. We’ve only gotten together over the past several months. The fact that the driver turned out to be Ben was a very unwelcome surprise.”
She blew out a long breath. “I can imagine.” Gina was nervous, looking around and fidgeting in her seat.
“Look, I’m not here to judge you. But I can’t keep this information from Bridget. I have to let her know what I’ve discovered. But before I say anything, I need to make sure that I’m not misrepresenting the facts. This is going to gut her no matter how I present it.”
She was wearing bright red lipstick, similar to the shade I loved on Bridget. On Gina, it just seemed dirty and unappealing.
“What do you want to know?” she asked.
I figured I’d tread lightly rather than skipping right to the most important piece. I needed her to feel comfortable opening up to me so that she didn’t feel the need to hide anything.
In the least abrasive tone I could conjure up, I said, “You indicated you carried on an affair with Ben for about a year…”
“Yes. We never meant to hurt anyone. I had a boyfriend at the time, too. But Ben and I…we just connected. It started as an innocent flirtation at work, just emails and text messages and what not. Then we ended up on the same business trip once and well, you know…”
“Unfortunately, I do know, yes.” My blood was boiling. “Did he ever…talk about why he was cheating?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “He loved his wife. There was never any doubt in my mind about that. He never spoke negatively about her. They’d just been together for so long, and I think their relationship lacked excitement in certain areas.”
“Did he say that exactly?”
“Well, he’d tell me that he didn’t feel comfortable exploring…certain things sexually with her. He didn’t feel right because she was the mother of his child.”
If that wasn’t the sorriest excuse I’d ever heard.
Gritting my teeth to hide my anger, I said, “Right. He’d make love to her and he’d fuck you.”
“If you want to put it that way…yes.”
“Did he ever talk about leaving Bridget?”
“No. I knew he would never consider that because of his son, and I would have never asked him to. But honestly, we didn’t talk a lot about his home life when we’d spend time together. That wasn’t the point of our affair. We enjoyed the carefree nature of our relationship. The few times he opened up, he did mention that even though he loved his wife, that things between him and Bridget were strained at times. He didn’t think Bridget was happy anymore. Ben was with me for an escape, and I was escaping a bad relationship at the time myself. We really didn’t set out to hurt anyone. We never wanted anyone to find out about us, certainly never intended it to come out this way.”
He wanted to escape his home life.
I looked up at the ceiling and silently continued my conversation with him from earlier.
Bridget wasn’t happy? Go fuck yourself, Ben. Maybe if you’d given your wife the same energy you’d given your whore…things would have been different.
I continued, “So, your philosophy is…what people don’t know won’t hurt them?”
“Basically, yes. I mean, we weren’t really thinking about anyone else. It was selfish, but we couldn’t help our connection. Once you cross the line the first time, that’s it. You can’t really go back, nor do you really want to.”
I needed to get to the crux of the matter before I lost it on her and flipped this table.
“You have a daughter…”
“Yes.”
“I think you probably can guess what I’m going to ask next.”
“Olivia is not Ben’s,” she insisted.
Squinting my eyes skeptically, I asked, “How old is she again?”
“Three.”
“Technically, it’s possible, then. How can you be sure she’s not Ben’s?”
“I’m ninety-nine percent sure.”
My eyes stretched open. “Ninety-nine. Not a hundred…”
“Like I said, it’s nearly impossible.”
I leaned in. “How is that the case if you were having regular sex with him?”
“Ben was religious about using condoms. He didn’t want to take even the smallest risk of getting me pregnant.”
“And this other man you were with…you had unprotected sex with him?”
“Yes. He was my long-term boyfriend. We’d been together almost ten years when I met Ben. Brian and I aren’t together anymore.”
I checked my phone and realized it was time for me to head to work.
“Look, Gina, I’m not going to push this issue or do anything to influence Bridget one way or the other, but if she ends up wanting a DNA test, would you be willing to have Olivia tested to match for a sibling against Brendan?”
“Yeah. I mean, if it will put this to rest. My ex, Brian, knows about my affair with Ben. I ended up telling him after we broke up. But he’s taken responsibility for Olivia. He believes he’s her father.”
“Alright…well, I appreciate your willingness to cooperate if it comes to that.” I stood up. “I have to be going now.”
She stopped me. “Before you go…for what it’s worth, please tell Bridget I’m really sorry. I don’t think she’s gonna want to hear that. But it’s the truth. It was so hard not being able to go to Ben’s wake and funeral. Aside from my own injuries that prevented me from it, I couldn’t face her. Ben may not have been in love with me like he loved his wife, but I knew he cared about me. It wasn’t just sex, you know? We were friends, too. I’ll never get over what happened to him. But I certainly wish that this whole thing hadn’t come out. Nothing good can come from this now.”
“I wish I’d never found out about it, to be honest. Now, I’m faced with having to ruin her memory of him. But I can’t not tell her.”
“I understand. You’re in a difficult position.”
“Thank you for taking the time to speak with me.”
“No problem.” She smiled, her eyes landing on my torso before returning upward. “Bridget’s a lucky woman.”
I walked away, refusing to acknowledge her last comment, which didn’t sit right with me at all. It made me feel like she’d do it all over again if given the opportunity. Once a cheater, always a cheater. It was amazing how easy it was for her to justify her actions. They had a connection, my arse. Fuck that. He was married to someone who believed in him and who thought their marriage was sacred.
Driving to the hospital, I didn’t know how I was going to make it through my long shift. I wouldn’t have the opportunity to address any of this with Bridget until our mutual day off this weekend. While the time apart would allow me to gather my thoughts, I wasn’t sure there was any way to do this without shattering her world.