Chapter 3

 

Getting home much closer to six o'clock than he liked, Darren kicked off his shoes and flopped onto the sofa. Giovanni read his mind, handing him a cup of coffee and a plate that had their takeaway already out of the box and laid out. Spaghetti bolognaise for him and a calzone for his boyfriend.

“So, Mum called me,” Giovanni said, right off the bat.

“Yeah?” Darren mumbled around his coffee cup, as he took a sip. He wasn't sure what to expect, since she insisted this whole fundraiser thing was supposed to stay a secret.

He laughed and cut a corner off his calzone. “Mum can't keep a secret to save herself; she told me about the fundraiser within two minutes. Do you need help getting it organised? She hasn't left you a lot of time, with just a few days to get it all organised and ready to go,” he admitted.

“Damn.” He frowned as he put his coffee cup on the table and sighed. “Fine. Yes, I could use some help. I bought most of the list this afternoon, Rhett bought some advertisements and he's getting together with Eddy tonight to make some flyers for the local stores,” he explained, picking up the fork from his plate to tuck into his meal. It was so good to come home to food already on the table. Even if it was takeaway.

“Okay. That's a lot for one day,” Giovanni agreed, popping a bite into his mouth. He looked contemplative for a moment, as he chewed.

Darren left him to think it over, while he ate and grabbed the TV control. It was one of those fancy things that hooked up to the laptop, so he avoided the actual channels and chose the laptop function to bring up the roaring fire app that Giovanni had downloaded a few days ago. He couldn't help but smile and lift his feet onto the coffee table as he settled to eat his dinner.

This is nice. Comfortable and quiet, after a long day.

“Oh, and I got a venue,” he admitted, recalling that he hadn't said that yet. “I got the Harcourt Hotel for free, by promising to introduce him to the Bayley's.” He laughed at the surprised look that passed over Giovanni's face. “Well, I figured it wouldn't do any harm. They can always hash it out between them. I never actually promised anything.”

Giovanni shook his head and smiled. “You're amazing,” he approved, leaning in to kiss his forehead.

Closing his eyes to the contact, he thought about the other thing weighing on his mind and sighed. “Gio...baby, I'm scared,” he confessed, leaning against him for a moment, as he gathered his courage. “I don't mind going to the cabin if it will help Konnor, but I don't really know anyone. I only know Lachlan through the computer and because he came to write for us. I know nothing about the rest of them,” he said, feeling like an outsider invited to a get together that was far too intimate for how well he knew anyone.

He'd only ever interacted with Konnor through Casen, who was the go-between. Even then, they only got along because he and Tam kept a close eye on Giovanni's recovery. It wasn't a 'real' friendship, where they genuinely met and liked each other for their own merits. It was more of a kinship, because they both wanted Giovanni to be safe and well, so they bonded through that.

It wasn't enough to warrant a whole week in the company of strangers.

“I know it's scary, but you belong there as much as anyone does,” his boyfriend whispered, reaching up to brush his fingers across Darren's cheek. “You're the one who got Konnor into therapy, so you deserve to be there to see how well he's doing. If anyone has a problem with that then they can go take a flying jump,” he argued.

It was sweet, but not enough to sooth him. Darren lifted his head and admitted the truth. “No one knows, Gio. No one knows about...him. Or how it hurts me. What if they say something and I freak out? It wouldn't be the first time,” he warned, knowing damned well how often it happened.

He and Jaime still hung out as much as ever, both trying to work their way through all the things they'd experienced, though they were vastly different. Jaime was making progress, thanks to his friendship with Jean, but Darren would never fully recover. He'd accepted that a long time ago, but it didn't mean he could be around strangers for a whole week, without incident.

Giovanni kissed his forehead again, then his lips and whispered, “I'll be with you every second we're there. If anything happens, for any reason, you just have to tell me. You know I'd never let anyone hurt you, but I know you don't want me to tell them, either.” He made sense, but it didn't stop the dread from flowing through his veins and putting him off his food.

“I love you, Darren. We take this one day at a time, like always,” he reminded him. “It's like Rico said; things happen for a reason. When you freaked out at the restaurant, because of Jaime; when you met Paolo; even when you had that episode in Italy last month, because of the festival. All of it happened for a reason, showing us that we're stronger than we ever knew. Showing me that you can handle the bad shit and come out the other end stronger than before.”

All he could do was nod to that. It was true. The restaurant fiasco had made him open up to Giovanni about his triggers, Paolo had given him the strength to finally say that bastard's name, and the episode last month had been a fluke. It was a comic book festival and had centred around cartoon characters from children's shows; which, of course, brought back horrid memories of having to suffer through them while he did what he did. The only shining light from last month was that Giovanni had reinstated 'cuddle time', with the addition of cartoon reruns. It had been torture at first, but the Italian words had made it a little easier to bear. As had Giovanni holding him tight, while the cartoons played along with the horrific memories of his past.

But, Giovanni was right. He could now see a cartoon from back then and not flip out or be sent back to the nightmares of his childhood. It was a small victory, but one that made his life easier. Just as they all were.

“Do you want to read that letter again?” Giovanni asked suddenly.

He smiled and nuzzled into the crook of his neck, loving that question. “No, I'm okay,” he promised, though it was sweet of him to ask. Hell, it was damned thoughtful of Giovanni to do it in the first place. He'd had Rico write to the psychiatric ward where he was being kept, to get information about his confinement. The letter had come six months ago, letting him know that he was still locked up, still undergoing treatment and practically in a catatonic state after his latest attempt to escape backfired and caused a serious head injury.

Darren wasn't sure he'd ever heard anything more wonderful. Since it had arrived, Giovanni offered to let him read it whenever he freaked out, since it reminded him so starkly of how safe he was.

“I guess it will be okay. As long as you're with me I can face anything,” Darren whispered, promising himself that he'd never forget that.