It had been two days since I woke up from a coma.

Coma. Something I never thought I’d experience.

Just the thought of it made me want to gag.

“Maddie, honey, are you sure you aren’t hungry?”

"I'm fine, Grandmama," I lied, as I flipped through a Better Homes & Garden magazine. I wasn't hungry, and just the thought of having to chew and swallow something made my stomach twist in a million knots.

“Maddie,” she sighed, “You haven’t had a bite to eat since you woke up.”

I shrugged. “Have you seen my butt lately? I could stand to lose a few pounds.” Besides, I’d eaten two Jell-O cups. That counted as food, right?

“Don’t you ever let me hear you say that shit again.” I closed my eyes at the sound of Hendrix’s voice. I hadn’t even heard him come in. The man was built like a linebacker but was quieter than a mouse. “Maddie,” he called out my name, “look at me.”

Don’t look at him! Don’t look at him! Don’t look at him!

“Son of a bitch,” he cursed under his breath as he moved across the room to stand beside my hospital bed. Placing his hand under my chin, he tilted my head back. Being the brat that I am, I closed my eyes. “Maddie,” he growled, “open your damn eyes—now.”

Nope. Not happening.

“If you don’t open your eyes and look at me I swear to God, I will take you over my knee.” My eyes popped open. “Glad I got your attention. Now if I ever hear you say some self-depreciating shit like that again, I will spank your ass. Understand me?”

I rolled my eyes, and for the first time in two days, I replied to him. "If your hand comes anywhere near my butt, I'll use Grandmama's shotgun and shoot you in your ass. Understand me? You lost the privilege to touch me when you broke my friggin’ heart!” I jerked my chin out of his hand and hissed as nausea swamped me. Damn him for making me move like that! “And I’d appreciate it if you remembered that.”

Bitch mode fully activated.

He tightened his jaw and inhaled so deeply his nostrils flared. “You'll eat supper. Either you tell me what you want, or I’ll choose for you. Either way, you’re getting food in your stomach. Don’t care if I’ve gotta shove it down your throat.”

This asshole!

I opened my mouth to give him a piece of my mind but stopped when the door to my hospital room opened and a little head popped around the corner. My anger evaporated. “Declan,” I extended my arms, “come here, buddy.”

He didn’t hesitate in running to me and climbing up on the bed. Crawling into my lap, he slid his little arms around my ribs. “I missed you, Miss Madelyn.”

Holding him as close as possible, I rocked him against me. “Oh honey,” I choked back a sob as I buried my face in his lavender scented hair, “I missed you too. So much.”

I looked up and spotted Liam and Clara standing by the door.

Liam looked like he wanted to come to me but he was hesitating. "Hey, little guy. Aren't you going to hug me? I sure missed the heck out of you."

He stepped closer. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

I unwrapped one of my arms from around Declan and gestured for him to get his rear end over to me. “You’re not going to hurt me, baby. I’m made of steel, remember?”

One second passed. Then two. Then three.

He finally crossed the room, climbed up on the bed, and sat next to me. I pulled him to my side and kissed the top of his head. “It’s been far too long since I had one of your special hugs.”

He tilted his head back and looked up at me. “Dat’s cause you’re here and not at home.”

He frowned and took in my face. I’m sure I looked frightening. I’d refused to look in the mirror since waking up, but from what the neurologist had said, the bruising under my eyes and behind my ear was all normal. Not to mention the bruising and swelling along the entire left side of my face where Colin had landed most of his punches.

Just thinking about him made the volcano in the pit of my belly churn.

Don’t think about him now!

I squeezed Liam against me. "Well, it's a good thing that you came to see me then. I was about to go crazy without you two little turkeys.”

Gently, I rocked them both in my lap. Then, I looked over to the door where Clara still stood. "Hey, beautiful lady." She smiled at me, but I didn't miss the tears filling her eyes. "How are you doing?"

Her gaze dropped to the floor. “I’m okay.” She paused, then continued. “Madelyn, I’m so sor—”

"Don't say it." I forced a smile. "There's no need, trust me." If she apologized to me for something that her piece of a crap husband did, then I'd scream. "It's not your fault, Clara."

She looked up. “But it is. If I hadn’t—”

I cut her off. “Nope. You’re not responsible for someone else’s actions. It’s as simple as that.”

Declan tugged on the front of my gown. “What happened to your face?”

Time to lie, lie, lie…

Liam nor Declan knew the truth about what had happened to me, and I sure wouldn't be the one to tell them. I didn’t want them to feel bad about what their father had done. Like I’d told Clara, it wasn’t their guilt to carry.

 “Well,” I said, smiling, “you are not going to believe this.”

Declan’s eyes widened—almost comically—as he and Liam both gazed up at me. "Remember how I told you guys that you shouldn't run down the ramp because it gets slippery when wet?" They both nodded. "Well guess who ran down the ramp right after it rained."

Declan smiled. “You did!”

I sighed. “I did. And guess who slipped and fell face first onto the concrete?”

Declan screamed, “You,” while jabbing a finger in my face.

“Yep, me. How silly was I? I mean sheesh!”

Liam smacked his forehead and laughed. “Dat’s why you don’t run in flippy floppy shoes!”

Hendrix chuckled, and I couldn't stop myself from looking up and smiling at him. How many times had he gotten pissed at me for wearing flip-flops over the years? Too many to count.

"That is exactly why you don't run in flip-flops." I looked at Liam then Declan. "Let this be a lesson to you both. Only run in sneakers. M'kay? And no running on wet concrete—ever!"

“Okie-dokie!” Liam shouted.

“Okie-dokie?” I replied. “You’ve been spending time with Shelby, haven’t you?

He nodded. “I like Shelby. She’s pretty, and she smells good.”

I gasped in mock outrage. “Why Liam O’Bannon! You sneaky little snake! Are you two-timing me?”

His eyes widened, and he smiled. “Nope! You’re both too old for me.”

“Oh, you little…” my voice trailed off as I tickled his ribs. He flopped backward and laughed his little heart out. The sound made my head feel like it was splitting in half, but I didn’t care. I’d endure whatever pain was necessary to hear his melodic laughter.

Liam pointed at me with a sneaky grin on his face. “When you have a daughter imma marry her!”

Oh, Lord.

I don't know why I did it, but I glanced over at Hendrix. His arms were crossed over his chest, and he was staring at Liam with raised brows.

His eyes met mine, and my heart broke a little.

We were supposed to have babies and raise a family.

“Well,” I said, looking back down at Liam, “if I ever have a daughter, you have my permission to marry her,” I paused before adding, “if that’s what she wants.”

I could’ve sworn, I heard Hendrix mutter, “you will,” under his breath, but I couldn’t be sure.

Liam nodded once. "Good. Imma catches her frogs for presents, and imma kiss her every day."

My eyes met Clara’s. “You’re in trouble in a few years.”

She just smiled. “Don’t I know it.”

For the next two hours, all of us sat around chatting about everything under the sun. Well, everyone but Hendrix chatted. He just sat in the corner with his arms crossed over his chest and watched me.

It made me feel like an animal on exhibit at the zoo.

“We should get out of here. It's getting close to the boy's bedtime," Clara said as she stood from the small chair where she'd been sitting beside Grandmama.

Pouting, I stuck out my lower lip and looked at both boys. “You guys have to promise to come back and see me soon. If you don't, I'm gonna cry."

Both wrapped their little arms around me and squeezed. “We’ll be back before ya know it,” assured Declan.

Liam kissed me on the cheek before climbing down from the bed.

What he did next surprised the heck out of me.

Straightening his spine, he placed his little fists on his hips and stomped across the room until he was standing in front of Hendrix. Tilting his head back, he stared up at him. “Are you Hen-dicks?” I may have laughed at his mispronunciation of Hendrix’s name.

Hendrix squatted so they were close to being on eye level. “Yeah, buddy, I am.”

Liam narrowed his eyes. “Miss Shelby told Miss Hope dat you made Miss Madelyn cry.” He leaned forward. “I don’t like dat you made her cry.”

Hendrix hesitated in responding. He glanced at me before meeting Liam’s eyes again. “I don’t like making her cry.”

Liam stomped a foot. “So, don’t do it no more!”

Clara, Grandmama, and I just watched as the five-year-old who a week ago was scared to even speak to me, stood up to a man four times his size, to defend me.

“I’ll try my best not too.”

Liam nodded once. “Good. Cause if you do imma kick you in da knee.”

With that parting shot, he stomped off and stood next to Clara.

I barely held back the laughter threatening to burst free.

Eyes wide, Clara looked at me and waved. “I’ll see you later, Madelyn. Feel better, sweetheart.”

I waved back. “Bye, beautiful lady.” Then I waved at the boys. “You two behave.”

They replied simultaneously. “We’ll try!”

Pure trouble… both of them!

Grandmama stood from her chair as Clara and the boys walked out of the door. "It's about time for me to go as well. Supper ain't gonna fix itself, and God knows your Daddy will starve to death if I don't make him something."

Speaking of Daddy…

“Grandmama,” I said, my voice full of pain. “Why hasn’t Daddy come by much?” I didn’t understand it. I mean, I knew he was probably upset because according to Evan, I went outside by myself and gave Colin the perfect opportunity to attack me, but I didn’t think he’d be mad enough to keep his distance from me. Call me crazy, but I thought he'd be up my butt during my recovery. Instead, he'd been a ghost. Yeah, he'd come by, but even when he was here, he seemed so far away.

I didn’t get it.

Grandmama sighed. "Maddie, sweetheart, this is a rough time for your Daddy.”

That wasn’t an excuse. “And it isn’t for me? I mean, I’m the one with the broken head and all.”

She walked over to me and placed her hand on the non-hurt side of my face. “That’s not what I meant, sweetheart.” She smiled down at me, but I didn't miss the way her eyes glossed over. "You being hurt nearly scared a decade off his life, and seeing you laying in that hospital bed," she closed her eyes and shook her head, "it set him back twenty-four years, and dredged up all sorts of feelings that he’s having a hard time processing.”

“What do you mean it set him back twenty-four years?”

Grandmama ran a finger down my cheek. “You’re the spitting image of your mama, Maddie. When your Daddy saw you hurt and hooked up to all those monitors, it sent him into a tailspin. He’s having a hard time balancing the pain from the past with the fear from the present.”

Oh. “I get it,” I replied, even though I didn’t. I could understand that it was hard for him to see me hurt, but I didn’t understand why he'd keep me at a distance. I'd be lying if I said it didn't sting because it did.

It stung a lot.

Pasting a fake smile on my face, I looked up at Grandmama. “Well, I guess you better go make his supper then. I don’t want him to go hungry.” It was the truth. As disappointed as I may have been in him, I didn’t want him to go without.

Grandmama leaned over the bedrail and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Love you, sweetheart. More than all the stars in the sky.”

“Love you, too, you crazy old coot.”

She chuckled as she stood up straight. Well, as straight as she could with her bad back. “Sure, you do, hussy.” She turned to Hendrix. “You staying?”

Say no. Say no. Say no.

“Yeah.”

“Good. You going to make sure she gets some supper in her belly?”

Hendrix nodded once as he looked at me. “Oh, she’ll eat.”

Dick!

“Alright, I’m heading out. I’ll call and check on you in a bit. And of course, I’ll be back in the morning. Bye, sweetheart.” She looked at Hendrix. “Bye, behemoth.”

“Bye, Grandmama.”

 Tossing one last smile in my direction, Grandmama slid her purse that could double as a suitcase over her shoulder and walked out of the room.

Hendrix wasted no time in crossing the room. Sitting on the edge of the hospital bed, he placed both of his arms on either side of me and maneuvered his big body over mine. I laid back on the bed trying to put some distance between us, but he just followed me down. I scowled as he caged me in. “You mad, baby?”

That went without question. “Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because you won’t go away.” My chest ached as soon as the words left my mouth. Part of me screamed for him to leave but another part of me screamed for him to stay. My stupid heart was as indecisive as my brain.

Get away from me. No, come closer.

“You want me to leave, pretty girl?” He asked, his finger drawing an imaginary line down my throat. “And remember, Maddie, you can’t lie for shit.”

I really couldn’t. And knowing that, I didn’t reply at all.

That long finger moved across the center of my throat and slid down the other side before journeying across my shoulder and down my upper arm. "Answer my question, baby." I swallowed as my mind and heart warred with one another. "You want me to walk out that door and never come back?" His head dipped lower, his lips moved closer.

I swallowed; a fine sheen of sweat broke out on my brow.

Did I want him to walk out the door? Did I want him to leave again?

The answer was simple: no, I didn’t.

I may have been pissed, and I may have wanted to throttle him, but deep down I realized that his mere presence settled me. It made little sense—especially after what he’d done—but he made me feel grounded. Hendrix was my anchor. Always had been.

“Hendrix,” I whispered as he tilted his head to the right and licked his lower lip, “You need to back up.”

My heart pounded against my ribs, and my hands shook in my lap. “Why?”

The honest admission slipped past my lips before I could stop it. “Because I can’t breathe when you’re this close.”

He smiled and that dimple—the one that I’d always been so fascinated with—appeared. “Better get used to me being close, pretty girl, cause you’re never getting rid of me.”

Something inside of me snapped.

My chest heaved and that all too familiar feeling of despair engulfed me.

Pressing two fingers against my lips to hold back the sob that was working its way from my chest and into my throat, I said, “I didn’t want to get rid of you the first time.” The first tear slipped free. Then the second. After that, I lost count. My vision blurred and my body shook.

Hendrix closed his eyes. "Maddie," he whispered before tightening his jaw, "I didn't leave you because I wanted too." His shoulders shook, but whether it was from anger or sadness, I didn't know. It may be mentally twisted, but I hoped it was from sadness. I wanted him to hurt as badly as I did. “I left you because I had too.”

Lie. Lie. Lie.

I knew better. As much as Hendrix once loved me—or as much as I thought he loved me—nothing could have torn him away from me unless he let it. “Don’t lie to me.”

“Baby,” he hissed, leaning back and putting space between us, “I’m not lying. And soon you’ll find out the truth. But until then, I just need you to take my word for it. I would have never walked away from you unless I had no other choice.”

My head spun, my mind whirled. I needed answers, and I needed them now. “Tell me why.” I was nearing my breaking point. I couldn’t take much more.

But he wouldn’t budge. Shaking his head, he replied, “not until you’re better.” I was half a second away from cursing him to the moon and back when he kept talking. “It’s not an easy story, Maddie. Just give it some time, wait until you're stronger, and I swear to Christ I’ll tell you everything. But until then, baby, just trust me.”

“No.” My voice was weak. “I can’t trust you. Not after what you did.”

His head dropped forward, and he exhaled. When he looked back up, and his eyes met mine again, I lost my breath. So much pain, so much sadness. “Living without you for six years was bad enough, but hearing you say that you can’t trust me anymore, that cuts deep.”

“I’m sorry.”

And I was. I was sorry for everything. Sorry for whatever he swore made him leave, sorry that we’d lost each other. Sorry that we were both hurt and broken. But most of all, I was sorry that we were both harboring secrets.

Secrets that neither of us should’ve had to harbor in the first place.

Moving back, Hendrix smiled down at me. Lifting his hand, he ran his thumb along my jawline, careful not to nick the bruised or swollen areas. “Not your fault, Maddie. None of it’s your fault.”

He dropped his hand and took a step back. “Now,” he said, changing the subject, “tell me what you want to eat. I already talked to the nurse, and she said the doctors cleared you for real food, but we should probably keep it light. I don’t know how much your stomach can handle.”

I bit my bottom lip. "I don't know." I didn't.

“How about I call and order you some of Mabel’s chicken & noodle soup? I’ve got somebody that’ll deliver it.”

All Hendrix had to do was utter the name ‘Mabel's,' and my belly came to life. "That sounds so good.”

Hendrix smiled before pulling his cell phone out of his pocket. He pointed over his shoulder, “I’m going to step outside to use the phone. That okay?”

I nodded once. “Yeah.”

Walking over, he grabbed the TV control that was lying near my head and slid it into my hand. After that, he reached down and pulled the thin hospital blanket up to my waist before tucking it underneath my hips. Just like a burrito.

Using his free hand, he pulled up the hospital bed rail, locking it in place. Then he leaned over the rail and pressed the lightest of kisses to my forehead. “Rest, Maddie,” he whispered. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

I relaxed as his scent surrounded me.

Safety.

“Okay,” I replied, my eyelids already feeling heavy. It had been a long day, filled with numerous visitors, and I was tired.

So. Tired.

“Be right back, pretty girl.”

After pressing one last kiss to my forehead, he turned around and walked away.