“I got something,” Joe said.

 

Alexa sighed in relief. “Give it to me.”

 

“I know what he’s after. Some kind of gemstones. Diamonds I think. Looks like Hugh received them from Marshall’s guy and was supposed to deliver them, but never did.”

 

“Huh. Really?” That was unusual for someone with Rucker’s history. Criminals often kept in the same line of work. Gun dealers didn’t get into drugs. Goods smugglers didn’t get into drugs. And drug dealers certainly didn’t bother with smuggling goods. Maybe Rucker Marshall was into far more than she knew. “That doesn’t explain Damian though.”

 

She put her hand over the phone and turned to Hawk. “Joe thinks Rucker is after diamonds.”

 

Hawk gave her a skeptical face, then sat in deep contemplation.

 

“Probably ransom is all. He knows Hawk will give up the diamonds in exchange for the baby. Pretty basic kidnapping.”

 

“Have you got eyes on the kid?”

 

“Not yet, but we have someone en route to a suspected location. I’ll let you know as soon as we have more there.”

 

“You better.”

 

“Have I ever let you down before?”

 

“Well, don’t let this be the start.”

 

Joe harrumphed. “I do miss your smart mouth. Maybe I’ll withhold information until you agree to come back.”

 

“Chief wouldn’t let me even if I wanted to and you know it.”

 

“That was before you solved three major cases in one shot.”

 

“Nothing is solved yet, and I don’t think he’ll see it that way. Doesn’t matter. I’m not coming back.” She glanced at Hawk, at his disgusted face, then looked away again.

 

“I’ll let you know when I know more.”

 

She hung up and looked at Hawk for a long moment. His expression of disgust stayed there, frozen on his features. He seemed to be just seething under the surface, ready to let loose his rage at any moment. He hadn’t said much to her at all. And when he did, it was all business.

 

“What’d he say?” he asked.

 

“Diamonds. Something showed up in a police report that Rucker was looking for diamonds. Hugh supposedly received them and never delivered them. Do you know anything about it?”

 

“Why would I?” he snapped.

 

She took a deep breath. “Hawk, I know you’re pissed and upset right now. Getting mad at me isn’t going to help us find Damian. I’m not accusing you of anything. When I ask if you know anything, it means any suspicions, any hints of information, anything that might help us at all to find something out. It’s not a question meant to point fingers. Being Hugh’s brother, you’re the best source we have about him. You have the most power to help us find Damian.”

 

Hawk clenched his jaw. “I never knew Hugh to be involved in any way with any diamonds. I don’t have any suspicions or clues of anything at all.”

 

“Okay then. That’s all I needed. Do you have any idea where something like might be hidden? Places Hugh liked to keep things?”

 

He shook his head. “I’ll go search his place.”

 

“You still have access to it?”

 

“Yeah. I have the key and all. I still pay the rent.”

 

She pulled together her eyebrows. “Why?”

 

He lifted one shoulder. “I couldn’t let it go.”

 

“Well, good. Then let’s go check it out.”

 

She stood, but then felt immediately awkward.

 

“Don’t you have to call your partner or whatever? Send all the cop cars over there to make a big mess of this?”

 

“No. He’s not my partner, and I’m not a cop.”

 

“But you want to be.”

 

“No, I don’t. If I did, I still would be.”

 

“But he wants you to come back,” he accused.

 

“He does. Partners get close. We worked together a lot. But just because he wants me to come back doesn’t mean that’s what I want. Or that it would be an option if I did. It’s not. I’m never going to be a cop again. Being a PI means I can work with them, but it also means I can supersede them and act on my own. I don’t have to tell them anything at all. I’m not obligated to them in any way.”

 

“Okay, fine. I don’t need a detailed explanation for every answer. Just because I’m not a cop doesn’t mean I’m an idiot.”

 

“I don’t think you’re an idiot.”

 

“Then stop talking to me like I am.”

 

She swallowed hard and the dread in her stomach rose. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Come on.” He gestured toward the garage. “I’ll drive.”

 

He got in and looked over at her in the passenger seat. “You didn’t tell anyone we’re doing this?”

 

“No.”

 

“And they don’t even know I have access to his place?”

 

“I don’t know. They didn’t seem to, but all they’d have to do is look at the rent records to see your name paying it.”

 

“I pay cash.”

 

“Whose name is on the lease?”

 

“Still Hugh’s.”

 

“Then they may not know,” she said. “But they might guess. In either case, no one knows we’re going over there right now.”

 

“So, there’s not going to be police tape all over and cops crawling the place?”

 

“No.” She let out a hard sigh. “We’re not the enemy, you know.”

 

He started the car and let out a humorless chuckle. “We’re? So much for not being a cop. Alexa, it’s in your blood. You may not be on the force, but you’ll always be a cop.”

 

She looked out the window, fighting tears. She could give him some explanation about how it was still new to her, that maybe he was right and she still thought like a cop sometimes after doing the job for so many years, but it wouldn’t make a difference.

 

They pulled up to Hugh’s apartment but no one was around. She was glad for that. After all the promises she’d made Hawk, she was afraid the cops would have come to check the place out on their own. It’s what she would have done if she was still on the case.

 

She followed him to the door and inside. The place was a wreck. Clothing, trash, and half-eaten food sat in piles all over the floor. Had this really been a crime scene once? How was anyone supposed to find evidence in this mess? She didn’t remember it being quite this bad, but it had been several months now since she’d been there.

 

“Have you been over here since the initial investigation?” she asked.

 

“Not really. I came back to get the rest of Damian’s things. I went through some of Hugh’s things, but it was too much at the time, so I left it.”

 

“Where do you think he might have hidden something valuable?”

 

“No idea.”

 

Hawk went to the entertainment stand and started going through the drawers, pulling out stacks of papers and other knickknacks. She did the same, starting with a small coffee table that had a drawer in the center. She would need gloves before going through the piles.

 

“If you come across anything else that you think might give us some information, let me see it,” she said.

 

“Yes sir, officer.”

 

She gritted her teeth at his attitude and tone, and couldn’t escape the hostility in his voice.

 

Anything related to the investigation or anything she said that sounded vaguely cop-like would be met with a snide remark. She tried to resign herself to the job, but being this close to him and being reminded of the tension she had brought to their relationship by lying stung.

 

They searched in the living room without finding anything until she decided the bedroom was a more likely place for Hugh to hide something and moments later Hawk followed. She pulled open a drawer of his bedside table as he went to his brother’s dresser. She found things she expected like magazines, old chapsticks, lose change, a rusty knife. There was a beat up photo or two of Damian.

 

Hawk pulled out clothing and let it fall in heaps on the floor. She checked in the light fixtures. Finally, she tipped the mattress to look under it but there was only a dog-eared Playboy.

 

“I’ll take that,” Hawk said, snatching up the magazine and folding it in half to stick in his back pocket.

 

“Finding anything else good?” she asked.

 

He’d moved onto to the other bedside table, which must’ve been Jessica’s judging by the tampons and earrings he held in his hand.

 

“Jessica’s drug paraphernalia.” He picked up a dirty pipe with two fingers. “Gross.”

 

“Any drugs?”

 

“Just this.” He held up a small baggie with a tiny amount of marijuana in it. Nothing worth cataloging.

 

Alexa made sure to go through any spot small enough to hide a diamond. She wished she had more information on this whole thing. Was it loose or in a ring or necklace? Was it just one, or were other gemstones with it? She was searching blind and without Rucker giving the more information that meant she had to check everything. They spent hours going through the place. After she went as in-depth as checking in the toilet bowl, she didn’t think there was any place left to check.

 

“I think this place is clear,” she said.

 

“Is that your professional opinion?”

 

“It’s my opinion as someone who spent the last hours searching through every inch of this place. You don’t agree?”

 

“I try not to agree with the police on anything.”

 

“I bet you agree with them a lot more than you realize. They’re not the enemy.” At least this time she’d said “they” instead of “we.”

 

“You can only say that because you’ve never been on the receiving end of their bull. You were never put in jail for something you didn’t do. You didn’t watch your brother’s killer go free on the street and have the case close with some lame excuse. The cops let me down and screw me over every chance they get. Including you.”

 

“Me? I’ve spent weeks trying to solve Hugh’s case. Now I’m doing everything I can to find Damian. How have I screwed you over? I’ve been trying to help you this whole time.”

 

He turned away from her. “You lied, you kept things from me, you messed with my head. Seems about typical police business, if you ask me. You manipulated me to get what you want.”

 

“It’s really not like that.”

 

“Are we done here?”

 

“I think so. Unless there’s any other place you want to check.”

 

“No.” He slammed the door behind him.

 

She followed him outside and found him waiting on the porch. He locked the door and got in his car. She slid in beside him, and he wasted no time driving off. She’d barely had the door closed.

 

“I wish you could forgive me and see that everything I’ve done, even if it wasn’t done in an honest way, has been for you and Hugh and Damian.”

 

“I don’t need a speech about how wonderful and perfect and noble you are. Maybe if I didn’t have a cop in my house, Rucker wouldn’t have broken in and given me that message to stay away. Maybe they wouldn’t have taken Damian. If I had been here, things would have been different.”

 

“If you want to blame me for Damian being taken, fine. I was the one watching him, and you’re right. I didn’t stop her, even though I tried. It’s my fault. He was taken on my watch. I didn’t provide proper care and protection when you trusted me to do that. I—”

 

“I would have expected a cop to know what was happening. Maybe not a civilian. When I thought you were just a woman with no training, I didn’t hold you accountable at all. But you have training. You’ve supposed to prevent crime and stop criminals. But you just sat there and let her stroll right in and take my baby. So much for police protection. Even having the cops in my house watching my kid didn’t keep him safe. And you want me to trust the police? Nope. Screwed over again.”

 

“Hawk, it’s not like that, and I am not a cop. It’s not like I was on active duty with my gun on my belt. I was sitting here, playing with a baby. I checked the window before I opened the door. I wasn’t going to let her in. But she came in anyway. She picked the lock, she hit me on the head—”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” he said. “Your wonderful police training kept you from getting assaulted and from letting a break in occur. Come on, Alexa. If I was allowed to have a gun, I would have shot the bitch. I would have protected Damian. You’re allowed to have a gun. But you didn’t bother to use it.”

 

“I don’t generally keep my loaded gun while I’m playing with babies.”

 

“Well, when that baby is at risk of being kidnapped from a crazy woman, maybe you should.”

 

“I’m sorry. Do you think I don’t feel terrible about what happened? Do you think I don’t already blame myself and probably will for the rest of my life?”

 

“Well, your guilt doesn’t bring him back now, does it?”

 

“No, but I’m doing everything I can to get him back.”

 

He made a disgusted face and stopped talking.