Chapter One

Sophie

“Who am I kidding? I’m not going anywhere.” Pulling a cotton pad from the glass jar on the vanity, I slowly began removing my makeup. My hand had been shaking so badly, the eyeliner was all over my lids. My lip gloss had smeared, giving me the appearance of clown lips. And though I’d tried my best at contouring, the result was terrifying but still not as scary as the thought of leaving the condo. If given a moment, I’d be able to come up with a million excuses for my absence at her party. I could go with the classic “I’m not feeling well.” It wasn’t a lie. It just wasn’t the whole truth either.

Maybe I should figure out a way to suck it up and go. Katie had always been there for me. Now she was starting a new job after completing her degree in journalism from NYU. She loved the camera, and it loved her right back. The success of Sophia Kate, the business we’d started as teenagers, had proven it. I thought we were going to make it our career. Then she’d finished high school without me and decided to go to college, leaving our empire in my hands.

Because of her departure, I’d renamed it Simply Sophie and rebranded. There would be no more makeup. After the incident with C. J., I never put my face, or any other questionable body part, in front of a camera again. Instead, I stuck to my hands and reveled in the anonymity. The best part? I was good at it. I loved it. And I made a fortune from nail art. With all my free time spent alone, I could sit around and try new methods for at-home manicures. People marveled over the YouTube tutorials, and each video racked up millions of views. Eventually, a company approached me for a partnership. I made the designs and promoted these new vinyl nail coverings. They sold them, we split the profits, and everyone was happy. The business became a huge hit. We even had our own sales force of mompreneurs pushing them through various distribution channels.

At first I told myself I stayed inside all the time because I was so driven. Then I realized I didn’t want to be around people anymore. In my uptown condo, I’d managed to create the home I’d always wanted and the lifestyle I’d always dreamed of . . . mostly. At the moment, I was flooded with guilt. I wanted to support her. None of this would’ve ever happened without Katie pushing us to start creating the videos and posting them online. Though our paths had diverged, how could I not be there to celebrate her success? As I stood staring out the window, I swallowed hard, knowing she’d understand. It only made me feel worse.

Reaching for my cell phone, I called. She answered in less than two full rings. “I was expecting this,” Katie grumbled, the irritation evident in her voice. “You can’t do it, can you?”

I exhaled, realizing I’d been holding my breath. “There are going to be so many people. Your parents never do anything small, and this is to celebrate your new job,” I said, struggling to explain.

“I know,” she murmured. “I swear your parents did you a huge disservice by moving you to the country.”

“It was all right. I spent every weekend with you, remember?” The visits had stopped when she’d gone off to college, of course.

“Yeah.” She laughed. “Good times. We managed to keep our little company afloat. Now look at you. You make hundreds of thousands a year, and I’m hundreds of thousands in debt.”

“You could come back if you want. I’d hire you in a heartbeat.” I bit my lip and hoped. Katie had always been my link to the outside world.

“Nah. It’s all yours. I’m looking at starting with WBTV tomorrow. Maybe tonight, if anything big happens. They always break in the new kid at god-awful hours.” She laughed, and I could tell she was really excited by the prospect.

“Well, I’ll look forward to seeing you on TV, unless you want to move in with me until we find some brothers to marry in a joint ceremony.” This had been our dream when we were younger. I tried to sound all breezy and light as I reminded her, but damn, I missed spending time together. Living alone in a big city while working online can get very lonely.

“Actually, I found an apartment.” Katie spoke quietly, hesitantly. “And I may have even found a man.”

“Oh.” I didn’t know what to say. The disappointment I felt was acute. “I mean, I’m happy for you.” This was the point when I should have been asking to meet him, but I rarely let strangers into the condo. And I didn’t often go out socially, so even initiating the discussion seemed senseless.

“Thank you. Wanna do lunch soon?” In the background, I could hear her mother calling for her. “Ugh. I gotta go. Guests are beginning to arrive for the big party. You know . . .” Her voice trailed off. I’d barely managed to grunt a goodbye before she’d ended the call.

We both realized I didn’t know what it was like. After the funeral, we’d stopped having company. I’d stopped having birthday parties, and my parents rarely had ventured out for anything other than the monthly shopping trip. They seemed to love life on the homestead, living off the grid and shunning technology as much as possible, since it had been the catalyst for our downfall. Me, I’d never given up many parts of my old life. Despite their wishes, I’d had a secret phone all through high school, paid for with money from Sophia Kate. In fact, I’d had all the other trappings of a normal teen too. I just couldn’t keep them at my house.’

Once my mother proclaimed my studies completed shortly after the winter I’d turned eighteen, I’d passed the test for my GED, then moved out, into my first place. During what would’ve been my high school years, I’d saved enough money to buy a modest condo outright. It had felt great, starting my real estate portfolio while everyone I’d known was starting college. There had been a few other purchases as well, but my favorite was this place. By the time I was twenty-two, I’d earned enough money to buy my fancy uptown condo with loads of amenities I never used.

Walking back to my closet, I slowly pulled the dress over my head, dropped it into the hamper because I was too lazy to hang it up, and grabbed the nearest pair of pajama pants and a baggy T-shirt from my dresser. This attire had become my standard work-from-home wardrobe for night and morning. During the day, I liked to mix it up with yoga pants or my LuLaRoe leggings. I walk on the wild side. I sighed. Apparently, I also had taken to adding commentary to my life.

Settling down in front of the computer, I started to respond to emails. The work was never done. I rather liked it that way. I hated having too much time to think. When I did, I started replaying my life, which only caused more heartache. I imagined where I’d be if I’d never texted with C. J., or if I’d tried harder to befriend my brother. Maybe he’d still be alive. Maybe my parents would’ve kept their jobs. I’d still be here, but maybe I wouldn’t be scared of . . . everything, which was only a slight exaggeration.

I’d soon caught up on all my emails. After making myself a hot cocoa for the chilly fall evening, I turned the lights down, leaving just one on over the kitchen sink. Then I curled up in my lounge chair and pulled my blanket over me to relax with some television. Tonight, my dark mood had me watching ID’s Killer Confessions.

Sometime later, the fire alarm woke me. I blinked several times as I struggled to understand what was happening. Already some smoke had seeped into my place, so I forced myself off the lounger to investigate. In all honesty, I wasn’t too worried. There were plenty of sprinklers in the building. Damn! I needed to protect my belongings. Rushing to the kitchen, I grabbed the garbage bags stored under the sink. Naturally, I was insured. Yes, I had money, but this didn’t mean I wanted to lose everything and have to start over. Again.

The smoke was getting worse, so I rushed to my door and looked out the peephole. There was no sign of fire, and my door wasn’t even warm. Running to my bathroom, I grabbed a big bath towel and wet it thoroughly. Then I laid it in front of the door to prevent any more smoke from wafting in. My efforts seemed to be working. With this accomplished, I returned to protecting my electrical equipment.

The constant beeping created an all-too-familiar stress. Even though I tried to keep busy and think about anything else, I could feel my palms getting sweatier. It seemed, from the sounds in the hall, that everyone was evacuating the building. In the distance, I could hear voices and people rapping on doors, but since I was at the far end of the hall, no one had bothered me yet.

As the knocking grew closer, I could make out the shouted words. “Fire department! We need you to evacuate the building. Anyone in there?” This time it was my door. Regardless of what the firefighter said, I couldn’t go. The very thought of dealing with so many people already had my heart beating erratically.

Walking over to the window, I peered down toward the ground. Through the smoke, I finally decided there were at least six fire trucks on the premises and hoses strewn about on the pavement. The firefighters in full gear were everywhere. To my dismay, the news trucks had arrived. Cameras. No way was I leaving now. Still, I watched for the WBTV one, Katie’s new station. Turning on the television, I changed the channel until I picked up one showing the breaking news. There was my building. Flames were visible two floors down. Sitting on the edge of the couch, I stared at the screen.

“Firefighters have yet to determine the cause of the blaze,” the reporter announced. “We’re trying to get an update on how the evacuation is proceeding.”

My cell rang, and Katie’s picture filled the screen. After turning down the television, I answered. “Hey, what’s up?”

“What’s up? Seriously?” she huffed into the phone.

“Can you speak up? I can barely hear you over the background noise!” I shouted.

“Yeah. I bet so. You do realize there’s a fire, right?” she growled.

I laughed nervously, hoping to deflect. “Oh, it’s fine. Don’t worry.”

“Oh, I’m worried. In fact, I’m here!”

“What do you mean you’re here?” My face scrunched up as I tried to process her words.

“I’m downstairs . . . about to broadcast live on the scene. Why aren’t you down here?” She sounded furious.

I walked to the window to see if I recognized her. It was impossible to pick her out from the tenth floor. “I don’t see you.”

“You will. Take the stairs. Hurry.” She must have put her hand over the speakers because I could hear her speaking, but the words sounded muffled. “I have to go, but I’m not hanging up. Get your sweet ass down here before I send someone in to get you. I mean it!”

Apparently, she had to do a broadcast. It was her first. I should probably watch. Turning the channels, I found her. She was a natural. Her hair looked perfect. Her teeth were white and straight. Katie spoke clearly, using the typical newscaster tone. She was gonna be a star. I beamed as I watched her perform in front of the camera.

“There are several missing residents at the moment. Firefighters have been dispatched to locate them. Live on scene, I’m Kate McAllister for WBTV.” As the camera switched to the studio, I caught the fear in her face.

Dispatched firefighters. Sounded serious.

A new knock on my door interrupted my reverie. “Ma’am! I know you’re in there. Open up, or I’ll be forced to break it down,” the firefighter warned.

The thought of leaving the condo had me feeling faint. I couldn’t do it. I could wait it out, couldn’t I? He knocked again, this time more insistently.

I slowly pressed my face against the door to look out the peephole. He seemed to be peering in. It was disconcerting. “Please step back,” I said as calmly as I could manage. He did as I requested.

“See the uniform? It’s official. I’m here to help you get downstairs.” He smiled as he stared at the door through his oxygen mask, his arms tucked neatly behind his back.

“That won’t be necessary. I’m not leaving. I’m OK here!” I called through the door.

His smile faltered. “Ma’am, you aren’t safe. The heat of the fire may have weakened the infrastructure of the building. You need to leave. Some of the floors have already collapsed in other condos.” He dropped his arms, and I realized he had an ax in one hand.

“What are you doing with an ax?” Alarm bells were going off inside my head. I backed away from the door, eyes wide in fear.

“I’m coming to get you, ma’am. Don’t worry.” His voice echoed in the empty halls, even as it was partially drowned out by the commotion.

By the time he broke through the door, I still hadn’t figured out a way to convince him to let me stay. “I can’t leave!” I held my hands out in front of me, my best pleading look on my face. “Please, don’t make me.”

“You can’t stay. Do you want to die?” He stared at me a moment as he gradually closed the distance between us.

I balled my fist up under my chin as I considered his question. His eyebrows rose in surprise, and he stepped toward me once more.

“Wait! I’m thinking.” Reaching for my keys on the counter, I gripped them tightly.

“What are you doing with those?” His eyes narrowed while his lips twitched as though trying not to smile.

“They’re my keys. What do you think I’m doing with them?” Without pause, I moved into a defensive stance.

“Well, it looks like you’re planning on fighting me with them.” He shook his head while mumbling under his breath. The next thing I knew, he’d tossed me over his shoulder. The blood rushed to my head. I’d already felt faint. This pretty much finished me off. As we reached the bottom floor and made our way through the crowd of people clapping and cheering, I could feel myself losing consciousness. Still, I refused to give in.

He set me on my feet. “There.” He seemed pretty proud of himself. “Now you’re safe.”

“Ha!” I laughed. Then I turned on my bare feet and tottered while I moved toward my car, hand outstretched as I prepared to use the fob to unlock my vehicle. I made it all of two steps and then collapsed onto the asphalt. The last thing I heard before the darkness overwhelmed me was Katie’s voice, screaming my name.

Cameron

 

When she hit the ground, I reacted within seconds. Picking her up, I held her against my chest while I searched for the nearest ambulance. After clumsily sprinting to a gurney in my gear, I made sure to secure her before I helped the EMT lift her inside. I peeled off my jacket and pulled off the mask, and then I sat beside her. “Let’s go,” I urged as I stuck the pads for the heart monitor on her skin.

The EMT looked at her partner behind the wheel. “You heard him. Let’s get her to the hospital.”

Soon enough, the vehicle had lights on and the siren wailing as we pulled away from the building. Given the late hour, we arrived at the hospital in less than ten minutes. She was unconscious the entire time.

Once we unloaded and wheeled her into triage, I gave the report to the doctor on call. Our patient didn’t even have a name at the moment, but she seemed to be stable. Since there was some concern she might be suffering from smoke inhalation, she was moved to a floor but not the ICU because they were currently out of beds.

This worried me. I’d been working fire and rescue for the past six years, four of them in the marines. I’d seen what could happen without close monitoring. So despite the fact I wasn’t family and my supervisor would be pissed, I stayed. At first I stood and watched the monitors, my arms crossed over my chest, but we’d been trained to not rely entirely on equipment and to look at the patient too.

Frowning, I was sorry I did. There was something familiar about her, but I couldn’t place it. She was beautiful in a natural kind of way, without needing a lot of makeup. If I had to guess, she rarely wore any. The woman had smooth olive skin, dark hair and eyes too, as I recalled from our brief interaction inside the condo. When I stroked her hand, checking to see if she responded to my touch, I couldn’t help but notice the softness of her skin. In fact, I didn’t want to let go. Forced to sit, I shifted often in my seat.

“You know,” her nurse began, “I’ll watch her if you want to take a walk or get a little shut-eye.”

“It’s OK. I’m fine.” The lie came easily to me. I’d been lying about my mood ever since I’d returned from my last tour in Afghanistan two years before.

Shaking her head, she gave me a knowing look. “No, you aren’t. You’re just being stubborn. I’m getting you a pillow and a blanket. If you insist on staying in that chair, you might as well be comfortable.” She disappeared from sight and returned minutes later with everything she’d promised and more. “I saw you drinking one earlier,” she commented as she placed a can of Pepsi on the table within reach. “This way you’ll have something here if you decide you’re thirsty.”

“Thank you.” I spoke in hushed tones, afraid of waking the beauty in need of rest and recuperation.

“I’m just outside at the nurse’s station if you need anything.” She smiled at me before leaving the room.

I nodded her direction, then turned my attention to the woman I’d rescued. My eyes stung from the smoke. Leaning forward, I rubbed them and decided to give them a break, thinking I’d leave them closed for a minute or two. I should’ve known better.

“Let go!” She hissed as she yanked her hand out of my grasp.

I’d been balanced so precariously on the edge of the seat, it knocked me off-balance, and I nearly fell out of the chair. “Hey!” My eyes shot open. “Hey, you’re’ awake.”

Her lips were tight. “Yes. And now, so are you.” She had a white-knuckled grip on the railings beside her. After a moment of staring at me, her eyes narrowed. “You’re the firefighter who dragged me out of my condo.” She glared and crossed her arms over her chest.

For some reason, it never occurred to me she might react in such a way. Startled, I stuttered, something I hadn’t done since middle school. “I-I-I . . .” Finally I stopped trying to talk and took a deep breath. When I felt certain I could speak without making a fool of myself, I continued. “I prefer to think of it as saving your life.”

“Is the building still standing?” Her look soured as she spoke.

“Yes, I believe so.” For someone so tiny, she sure did have a way of making me feel like the small one. That took some doing since I stood at six-foot-three’” and 200 pounds of practically solid muscle.

“Then you didn’t save my life. You displaced me. And I want to go home.” She shook slightly, the only sign she wasn’t as calm and confident as she projected. Her eyes darted around. “Where’s the button?” she muttered under her breath.

“What button?” I reached over, ready to soothe her, but she yanked her hands away.

Eyes wide, she spoke through gritted teeth. “Don’t touch me.”

I held my palms out as I sat back in my seat, a sign of surrender. “OK. Can I help you find what you’re looking for, at least?”

“Button. Nurse.” She spit out the words. I could actually feel her tensing up, growing more scared and frustrated.

The controller she’d sought had fallen off the bed and was dangling out of her sight. Reaching for it, I threaded it through the railing and clipped it to the sheet within her grasp. “There.” Then I sat back and watched as she fumbled with the remote. In the short time I’d known her, it had already become clear that avoiding people was critically important to her.

Before she could even hit the button, the nurse popped in. “Hey!” She sounded ridiculously cheerful for three in the morning. “I thought I heard some commotion in here. How are you feeling?”

The woman wiped her hands on the blanket and then patted her flushed cheeks. “I’m great. I’m ready to go home now.” Her heart rate increased as she spoke, the beeping from the monitor nearly deafening. Her face focused on it. “Can you make that stop?” Her hands flew up to cover her ears.

Without thinking, I stood. I’d worked with this equipment before and knew I could lower the volume for her. The nurse, however, beat me to it. I gave her a grateful look and turned my attention back to our mystery woman. Something about her fascinated me. Her behavior . . . was it PTSD or another disorder? My eyes narrowed as I studied her and made mental notes.

“Well, the doctor has to sign off on your release. You were unconscious for several hours, which is a bit concerning.” The nurse frowned. “Of course, if being here does more harm than good, I’ll see what I can do to help.”

“It does.” She grew more agitated, now wringing her hands.

“I’ll be right back. Let me page the on-call physician.” The nurse backed out of the room again.

Alone once more, I waited a moment for her to calm down. When she seemed ready to listen, I said, “How can I help?” My elbows rested on my knees, my chin propped on my fists. She shook her head, and I saw her eyes glisten with unshed tears. I hoped to both distract and soothe her by breaking the ice. “My name is Cameron, but my friends call me Cam.”

“We’re doing this now? Really?” Her eyes rolled. “Fine. My name is Sophie, and I have no friends.”

My heart beat erratically when she shared her name. My breath caught in my throat, and I couldn’t stop staring. Was it really her? I’d know for sure if I asked the right questions. “How about family?”

“They don’t have a phone, and I don’t get out much, so . . .” Her voice trailed off, and I watched her swallow hard.

I found myself wanting to comfort her, which was strange because I hadn’t wanted to be close to anyone in a really long time. Determined to respect her need for space, I tucked my hands under my legs. “Nice to meet you, Sophie.”

She nodded. “Why are you here?” Her face scrunched up, and her head cocked to the side.

“I rode with you in the ambulance.” I shrugged.

Shaking her head, she frowned. “I get that, but why are you still here?”

I licked my lips before I spoke. “Well, I was concerned because they didn’t have you in ICU. Nurses can get busy. I wanted to make sure you were OK.” I expelled a breath and prayed my answer satisfied her.

Her eyes narrowed. “Don’t you have a kitten to save or something?”

My head tipped back, and nerves had me laughing harder than her words merited. “I think I already did.”

“What?” Her confusion was obvious, and her eyes darkened until they appeared nearly black.

“You’re my kitten in a condo.” I smiled at her and hoped she found the joke funny.

Sophie huffed. “Seriously?” Then she fidgeted nervously.

The nurse returned with a syringe in her hand. “OK. The doctor will be around as soon as possible. He’s dealing with an emergency at the moment. I have something to take the edge off.” Even as she spoke, she’d pulled off the cap with her teeth and begun to inject the drugs into a section of tubing closest to the IV. “There,” she murmured.

I braced for it. Somehow, I knew Sophie would never want to take anything that might somehow alter her mind, make her lose some of her precious control.

“Oh my God. What did you do?” She reached for the tubing in her hand and started to peel back the tape as though she wanted to rip it out before the drugs could hit her system. “What did you give me?” As the meds took hold, she couldn’t concentrate, and her brow furrowed as she struggled to grip the plastic.

“Like I said, we’re just trying to take the edge off. The doctor will be in shortly.” She glanced at me, obviously hoping for a show of support or understanding, but seeing Sophie so distraught made it impossible and I refused to make eye contact.

By the time the doctor arrived, Sophie was unconscious again, curled up in a corner of the bed, looking even more fragile than she had in her condo when I found her. My heart hurt for her. “How long will she be out?” I asked him as he studied her chart on the computer screen.

“At least a couple of hours, I should think. And you are?” His glasses were halfway down the bridge of his nose as he peered over them.

“I’m Cameron. I work for the Charlotte Fire Department as a fireman and EMT.” I pointed to my gear, now in a pile on the floor as further proof. I guess I hoped my credentials would mean something.

“Are you related to the patient?” He turned, crossed his arms over his white coat, and leaned against the wall.

Shaking my head, I sighed. “Her name is Sophie.”

“Then you need to leave. Thank you for your service.” He turned his attention back to the screen.

Though I didn’t want to leave her, I knew I wasn’t allowed to stay. Given the HIPAA laws, he couldn’t tell me anything, and security could be called to remove me if I didn’t depart on my own. I slowly dragged my aching body to a standing position and walked from the room. At the doorway, I paused and took a final look at Sophie, swearing this wouldn’t be the last I saw of her. I slowly trudged to the elevator, the late hour and physical exhaustion finally hitting me. Seconds later, the ding announced its arrival as the doors opened, and I skulked inside. With little traffic this time of day, I rode straight down without stopping.

Back on the main floor, my suspicions were confirmed. The blonde reporter stood at the information desk, arguing with the woman behind the computer. “You won’t give me her room number? Sophie Malloy. We’ve been best friends since we were five. I’m pretty much all the family she has.”

The woman at the desk shook her head. “No visitors until after nine in the morning.” The phone rang, and she turned her attention to answering it.

The minute we made eye contact, I recognized her: Katie McAllister. For some reason, she and Sophie had been as close as sisters. I jerked my head down the hall toward the elevators I’d stepped off moments earlier. “Room 513.” I glanced around to make sure the hard-ass working the desk hadn’t heard me.

Katie looked me up and down. “Oh, the hot fireman!” I wasn’t surprised she didn’t recognize me. Few did after I’d come back from Afghanistan. In fact, I was thankful for the anonymity and wanted to keep it that way with her. She made a choking sound. “Gawd, I can’t believe I said that.” She sighed loudly. “Thank you. I’m gonna go before I make a bigger fool of myself.” She turned and we started to part ways when I felt a tug on my sleeve, which had me tensing. “Sorry. How is she?”

I licked my lips, then murmured, “Asleep. They had to drug her to calm her down.”

Lifting her phone, Katie checked the time. “OK. I have some time. Wanna grab a coffee and you can catch me up?” She grinned.

It had to be nearly four in the morning. If I couldn’t help Sophie, I wanted to sleep. Then I realized I had a prime opportunity here. “What if we trade information? You want her current stats, and I want to know all about her past.”

I watched her consider it. “Why do you want to know?” Her eyes homed in on mine as though trying to decide if I were trustworthy, or maybe simply worthy in general.

My response rolled smoothly off my tongue. “I find her fascinating, and I want to help.” It felt good to speak the truth once in a while, even if it wasn’t the whole truth.

“Fascinating, huh?” The edges of her eyes turned up as a smile played on her lips. “Fine. I’ll give you the Reader’s Digest version. The rest will have to come from Sophie.” She chuckled. “Oh, and good luck with that, by the way.”

In the short time we’d spent together, I’d already discovered Sophie wasn’t quick to reveal . . . anything. With a grin, I followed her to the cafeteria to learn as much as possible about the girl I’d never stopped thinking about even after ten long years.