Under the layer of hurt and disappointment, I was angry at Alessio and at myself.
Why did I care?
It was a foreign and weird feeling coursing through my body. Anger. I didn’t remember the last time I let myself feel such emotion. I had learned how to turn off all my emotions, becoming numb to everything and everyone around me. Yet I felt hurt, disappointed, angry, and jealous.
Alessio gave me laughter, smiles, and peace. And now, in my heart, it hurt. It felt like he had taken all of that away.
I wasn’t supposed to care, but no matter how hard I tried to keep myself from getting emotionally involved, I had failed.
Looking away from the door, I stared down at the bouquet in my hand.
A sigh filled with dejection escaped past my lips, and I turned away from his office, slowly making my way to my room. Walking inside, I found Maddie sitting on my bed, with my book on her lap. Her head snapped up when she heard me.
“Ayla?” Maddie questioned, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Placing the book on the bed, she motioned me to come forward. “What’s wrong? I thought you were going to see Alessio.”
Swallowing hard against the ball of sadness, I shook my head and brought the flowers close to my chest. “He was with Nina.”
There was silence at first and then she erupted. “What?” she said, getting up angrily from the bed. “That little—”
“I didn’t get a chance to talk to him. He didn’t see me.” The image of them flashed before my eyes, causing a sudden wave of anger inside of me. I looked at the flowers and then without thinking, I threw them on the bed.
“Aww, baby…” I heard Maddie whisper beside me, her voice almost soothing. Swiveling around, I faced her, placing my hand over my chest.
“What is this feeling? I hate it. Is this what it feels like? Jealousy? If it does, then I don’t like it.”
Maddie’s eyes reflected sympathy and understanding. She walked closer and placed both hands on my shoulders. “Was does it feel like?”
“It hurts. I feel hopeless. Sad. And then angry. Maybe at myself, because I hate feeling like this.”
Looking back at the flowers that I had carelessly thrown away, I felt guilty. Another confusing feeling. Bending forward, I grabbed the flowers again and pulled the bouquet close to my chest. Burying my face in the soft petals, I closed my eyes with a sigh.
A tear escaped the corner of my eye, falling onto the petals. “I thought what we shared together meant something to him.”
“It did. I know it did. He is just too stubborn to admit it,” Maddie argued.
But I shook my head in response.
She released a tired sigh from behind me and then I felt her hand on my shoulders.
“Tell me something,” she whispered. “Why do you think you feel this way?”
I shrugged.
Maddie smiled at my response. “You feel something for him,” she stated confidently.
I sucked in a sharp breath, my heart fluttering at her words, while my stomach twisted in knots. Her words were shocking yet so true.
Maddie was right. I did feel something for Alessio. Whenever he was near, my mind and body felt like they weren’t my own anymore. When he was close, I felt light and liberated. And when he was far, my heart called out to him, wishing he was close again.
I didn’t want to admit it but Alessio had become the reason for my happiness. He had given happiness that I had never felt before. He made me smile, without even trying. My heart was at peace when I was with him.
I refused to admit that Maddie was right. She let out a small laugh, her eyes twinkling with mischief.
“Do you trust me?” she asked.
Taken aback by the sudden question, I nodded slowly. “Yes. Of course.”
“Will you do whatever I tell you?”
Staring at her in confusion, I asked a question of my own. “What do you mean?”
“Just trust me, okay? I got this. Just go with the flow and do whatever I tell you.”
I shook my head and gave her a serious look.
“Maddie, what are you talking about?”
“I’m really sorry. Like really sorry. I will apologize more later.” She bit on her lips nervously, and looked extremely guilty. I saw her wince and then I felt a sharp pain in my ankle. Did she just kick me?
“Ow!” I yelled, bending forward.
“Sorry.” Maddie took the bouquet from my hand and pushed me down on the bed, so that I was sitting.
I flinched at the pain and bent forward, rubbing a hand over my aching ankle.
I glanced up at Maddie and she pouted.
“What was that for?” I asked, completely stunned.
“Trust me, okay? Just bear with the pain. I’ll be right back,” she said, walking backward. Before I could answer, she ran out of the room.
Maddie was absolutely crazy. What was she doing now?
***
Alessio
Sitting back on my sofa chair, I watched Nina place her handbag on the coffee table as she took the seat in front of me.
“So?” I asked, feeling impatient. Just when I had been about to go see Ayla, Nina made her appearance. She was supposed to report back to me, but I had completely forgotten about it. I had only been thinking about Ayla.
And even now, all I wanted to know was whether she’d liked the flowers.
“Nothing much happened,” Nina said. “Alberto and his men are still treating the women badly. It’s still the same. Nothing changed. He has more power now, so it’s going to be harder to stop the abuse in the brothels and clubs.”
I’d sent her to keep watch on the clubs, acting as a whore so she could report back to me with internal information. So far, nothing had changed.
Sighing in frustration, I raked my hand through my hair. “Fuck.”
“I’m sorry. I wish I could help more, but…”
“You’ve done more than enough. But I want you out of there now. It’s getting too dangerous, and every time you go there, you are putting yourself at risk. Your services won’t be needed anymore,” I told her.
She looked confused for a moment, and then nodded. “What do I do now?”
“You are free to do whatever you want. I don’t want you anywhere near the clubs, understood?” I replied, my tone firm.
Nina nodded, keeping her gaze down in respect.
Leaning back against the sofa, I crossed my arms over my chest.
“You can leave,” I ordered.
“Oh.” Nina’s mouth fell open in shock. I knew what she was expecting, but she wasn’t getting it. Not today. Not anymore.
Her eyes widened for a second, and then she smiled, her expression turning seductive and sultry. She licked her lips and then scooted forward, her short skirt rising higher in the process until her thighs were barely covered.
“Alessio,” she whispered, getting up from the couch and walking around the coffee table toward me. I gritted my teeth in annoyance at her desperate attempt to seduce me.
A few days ago, I would have accepted her advances, and bent her over my desk, my cock inside her in a matter of seconds.
But right now, all I could think about was Ayla. Her sweet smile, her flushed cheeks, and swollen lips after my kiss. She had taken over my mind and senses, making everything and everyone else appear bleak in comparison to her.
I raised a hand to stop Nina’s advances when she leaned forward, showing me her barely covered cleavage.
“Nina—” Before I could finish, the door crashed opened, startling both of us. Turning my head, I saw a breathless Maddie running inside.
“Ayla,” she gasped. “She’s hurt.”
My eyes widened and I quickly stood up, causing Nina to lose her balance and stumble.
“What happened?” I demanded, my voice filled with panic.
Maddie took a deep breath and glanced at Nina before answering. “She twisted her ankle really bad and she can’t walk. She’s in her room.”
I swore, rushing out of my office. I made my way to Ayla’s room and found the door already open.
“Ayla?” I walked inside. She was lying on her bed but quickly sat up at the sound of my voice.
“Alessio,” she said, and then I saw her wince, her forehead creasing in discomfort.
Rushing forward, I stopped in front of her. “Are you okay?”
“I’m all right,” she said.
I looked down at her reddened ankle, then knelt in front of her, but didn’t touch her, afraid I might hurt her more.
When she moved her feet closer to the bed and away from me, I placed a hand on her knee, stopping her. “Don’t move.” Gently taking her foot in my hand, I inspected it. “Does it hurt when you move?’
“A little.”
I looked up at Ayla. She was staring down at me, seemingly confused.
Standing up, I bent forward and wrapped an arm behind her back and one under her knees, pulling her up so that I was cradling her to my chest.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m taking you to Sam. He will know whether you are okay or not,” I replied, walking her out of her room and downstairs to Sam’s bedroom.
Ayla was silent in my arms. When we got closer, I heard her sigh. “How did you know I was hurt?” she asked.
“Maddie told me you twisted your ankle. She said you couldn’t walk,” I replied.
“Oh.” A small smile appeared on her lips. It was faint and quick, but definitely there.
I stopped in front of Sam’s room and Ayla leaned forward to knock at the door. It opened within a few seconds and Sam stood in the doorway. His eyes widened at the sight of Ayla in my arms and he quickly moved back, motioning for me to enter.
“What happened?” he asked.
I placed Ayla on his bed, and stood beside her. “She twisted her ankle.”
Sam knelt down in front of Ayla and inspected her ankle. His lips twisted thoughtfully and he asked Ayla several questions while I hovered over her, anxious and worried. The thought of her being in pain didn’t sit well with me.
The sense of protectiveness I felt toward her was a first. The need to keep her safe and happy was a primal feeling inside of me. Every day it grew stronger, until only she mattered to me.
“It’s not bad. Nothing to be worried about. Just a very tiny sprain that won’t even hurt after two days,” Sam said.
He looked up and smiled kindly at Ayla, his brown eyes crinkling at the corners. “I’ll give you some pain relieving cream. Just rub it over your ankle twice a day until it doesn’t hurt anymore,” he said.
Ayla nodded and looked up shyly at me as a faint color tinged her cheeks. When she saw me staring, she quickly looked down nervously.
Sam came back with a small tube in his hand. “Here. This should help with the pain. Rub it gently over the aching area and it should do the work.”
“Thank you,” she said.
Maddie stepped into the room. “So?” she asked, walking straight to Ayla.
Ayla gave her strange look and shook her head. “I’m fine,” she replied before mumbling something under her breath.
She stood up and wobbled a little, and I instinctively wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close to me.
She placed a hand on my chest and tried to step out of my embrace, but my arms tightened around her, stopping her movement.
“I can walk,” she said, her voice coming out a little breathy.
“You shouldn’t put too much pressure on your ankle.”
Ayla glanced at Maddie. “She can help me. I’m sure you have other things to take care of.”
“Right. I’ll help her. Don’t want to disturb you from your work and all,” Maddie added, glaring at me.
Before I could answer, Maddie was already pulling Ayla away from me and I had no choice but to let her go. As she stepped out of my embrace, I suddenly felt empty and already missed having her small body against mine.
When they were out of sight, I nodded to Sam and then made my way upstairs. I saw Nina at the top of the steps. She smiled brightly, her eyes shining.
“Alessio,” she whispered.
“You need to leave,” I ordered, my voice harsh and unyielding.
“What?” she sputtered, her eyes widening.
“Exactly what I said. Leave. I don’t want you here anymore.” Nina was good at her job. She was an asset but I didn’t need her anymore, except for her work in the field.
“But Alessio—”
“I told you, your services won’t be needed anymore,” I said through gritted teeth, punctuating each words so she understood the meaning.
Her mouth opened shock. “You mean…?”
“You heard him. He doesn’t want to fuck you anymore. So get lost.”
At Maddie’s voice, I closed my eyes in frustration and pinched the bridge of my nose. Taking a few deep breaths, I opened my eyes to see her glaring at both of us.
Nina’s face turned stormy and she twisted her lips angrily, then looked back at me, waiting.
I gave her a cold stare and crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow in question.
“I’m going,” she snapped. Her expression was cold as she walked around me. Nina was a cold-hearted bitch and she loved it that way. And Maddie had to tread carefully before she got herself into trouble.
“Bye, Felicia,” Maddie called as she rolled her eyes.
When I reached the top landing, Maddie stepped in front of me, blocking my way.
“I swear to God…if you are playing Ayla…” she warned, anger glittering in her eyes.
“Why the fuck would you think that?” I growled, taking a step forward, completely outraged by her question.
She indicated where Nina had been standing moments ago. When realization sunk in, anger deserted me and I winced at the thought.
“Nothing was going to happen,” I said.
Maddie looked suspicious. “Ayla saw you going into the office with Nina. She thought…she was completely heartbroken, Alessio.”
Guilt coursed through my body and I swore under my breath.
“Imagine how you would feel if you saw Ayla with another man,” Maddie added.
The thought made me see red. My hands tightened into fists until my knuckles hurt. I gritted my teeth.
She raised an eyebrow. “Exactly,” she muttered before heading back toward Ayla’s room.
I stared at her back and then leaned against the banister, my mind filled with dangerous thoughts.
When I first saw Ayla and proposed that she work for me, this wasn’t what I had in mind.
She was supposed to work for me and I kept her close because I wanted to fuck her. That was my intention. But it wasn’t about lust anymore. It wasn’t about fucking her and being done with her.
It was more, something I couldn’t wrap my head around. A feeling that I didn’t understand.
But I wasn’t against it anymore. I let myself bask in this foreign emotion, waiting to see where it would lead me, hoping it wouldn’t destroy either of us in the process.
Sighing, I raked my hand through my hair. I thought I was the only one feeling what was between us. But Ayla felt it too, and I had hurt her.
A connection so deep, so irrevocably beautiful yet haunting and dangerous. It brought us peace, even through the pain.