CHAPTER TWENTY
MAYA. I walked to the gym, hating how drained I was. One day back at work and I felt as if my life force had been sucked from me. I didn’t see Cameron in the weight room. I briefly considered changing and getting on with the workout I’d promised him and myself I’d do tonight. Part of my whole not-drinking-a-bottle-of-wine-a-night initiative, which so far had been working well. Except now I wanted to wash away the weight of the day—Dermott’s decidedly cold attitude toward me and Jia’s threats—with a stiff drink.
Instead, I knocked quietly on the office door, entering when I heard Cameron’s voice. He was sitting at his desk, his brow knitted as he stared at the screen intensely.
“Hey.”
He looked up, brightening when he saw me. “Hey, baby.”
“What are you working on?”
“End of the year financial stuff. It’s giving me a headache. Come here.”
I dropped my bag and came to him, curling up on his lap without reservation. He hugged me close. I nuzzled into his neck. I breathed him in, tension releasing immediately.
“Okay day?”
I shook my head.
“Do I need to hurt someone?” His voice held only the smallest hint of humor.
“No. But I’m not sure if I’m going to have a job much longer.”
“What happened?”
“I called Jia out on being a manipulative bitch, and she threatened me.” I leaned against his strong chest, resting my head on his shoulder. “I called her bluff. Told her that I didn’t need the job, which of course is a complete lie. I’ve done well and saved, but I need that job. I can’t afford to keep Eli and me in that apartment without a decent paycheck.”
“Then move.”
“Do you have any idea how difficult it is to get an apartment with a bedroom that size? I had to jump around for a few years to find that place.”
“Move in with me. I’ve got three floors to choose from. And fuck the job. You hate it anyway. We’ll find you something else. Maybe you could help me around here for awhile.”
I laughed. “You are seriously living in a dream world. My place is not in this gym except when you force me or guilt me into coming here.”
“I meant on a business level. I’m up to my ears in paperwork. I had the vision for the gym, and I have a vision for more. I got the investors I needed and made it happen. But the rest of this shit is driving me crazy. It’s going to catch up to me one day.”
I sighed. A little part of me leaped at the portrait he painted of how things could be. Another part of me brushed it off as completely unrealistic. I couldn’t ditch Eli, and I couldn’t give up on the career that I’d worked so hard for. As much as I wanted to run away, I was trying to do less of that lately.
“I’m happy to help, but I need to make this work. There are lots of banks I can work for if things don’t work out.”
“What if they make it difficult for you to switch companies? Aren’t they all sort of incestuously connected?”
I stared down at my fingers, noting the few nails I’d lost to today’s anxiety. I’d briefly considered that Jia or Dermott could blacken my name, blocking attempts to make at least a lateral move, but even that seemed too low for Jia. Had all of our interactions been a farce, or could I count on anything from our friendship?
I closed my eyes. “I don’t want to think about it. What’s the point in worrying when it’s all out of my hands now? She and Dermott will do whatever they decide to do because I won’t play their game.”
“Sure you don’t want me to talk to them? I could give them some powerful insights.”
I smiled, looking up at him again. His lips lifted into a grin, but I knew he was serious too. “Thank you for wanting to go to bat for me, but I promise I can handle this one myself.”
“Just say the word.”
I pressed a chaste kiss to his lips, so grateful for him and his impossible desire to be everything for me. After a moment, he broke the contact.
“How do you do that?” he murmured.
“What?”
“You make everything still. You’re all I can see. Everything goes out of focus but you.”
A slow smile curved my lips. “Is this a new development?”
“No. When I saw you again for the first time, with all the chaos on the street, I’d actually wondered if I’d recognize you. But I did in an instant. You could have had a spotlight on you. You light up the room, Maya.”
My cheeks heated, as I fell under his potent gaze. “Maybe it’s who lights me up.”
His expression softened. “I hope so.”
I held my breath, waiting for him to touch me, wishing he would. He brushed his thumb over my cheek lightly and fingered the teardrop pearls that hung from my ears. Leaning in slowly, he kissed my jaw, pressing his warm lips against my skin and then my lips until I was tingling everywhere.
His hands went to my hips, sliding down to my thighs. His fingertips slipped under the thin fabric of my skirt. I touched his chest, itching to run my fingers over every hard curve of his body.
He slid his hand up and down my legs, caressing the sensitive skin above my knee.
“I like this. You don’t usually wear skirts to work, do you?”
“I was feeling saucy, like I needed to make a statement when I faced them today.”
He hummed, smiling under my lips. “Are you still feeling saucy?”
I bit my lip, sifting my fingers through the hair that curled at his neck. A tiny spark lit inside me with his words. “Maybe.”
“Long day. I think you deserve a little stress reliever. What do you think?”
I nodded slowly. His gaze turned molten, stoking my spark into a healthy glow. His hand slipped between my thighs, tracing teasing circles all the way up, but evading the place where I needed him the most. I shifted restlessly, hoping he’d take the hint. Instead he lifted me off of him, pushing me back against the desk.
He shoved a few stacks of paperwork aside, making room for me to sit farther back on the desk.
“Lie back.”
I obliged, and he divested me of my skirt and panties.
“See if you helped me out with some of this, I’d have a better surface to fuck you on.”
I laughed. “I’ll take that into consideration.”
“Do, because I can already see I’m going to want to work this into your fitness regimen.”
He sat down and rolled closer, resting my feet on the arms of the chair so I was wide open to him. He kissed his way up my leg. I jolted at the barest brush of his stubble across my sensitive skin. I was already hypersensitive and on edge, too eager for the rush of his mouth over me. I craved it.
“Can’t wait to make you come, Maya.”
My breath hitched. Anticipation crept over me with every soft, teasing touch. He brushed his thumb along the seam of my folds, following the path with a broad stroke of his tongue. A quiet whimper escaped me. I threaded my fingers through his hair, moving in time with the expert strokes he lavished upon me. He rotated evasive licks with tiny flicks of his tongue over my clit. I wanted to enjoy every minute of this, being spread over his desk and pleasured, but I burned for him. The need to reach that mindless release took over.
I fisted gently when he increased the pressure, waves of warmth washing over me. My skin prickled.
“Cameron, I love your mouth.”
He sucked my clit between his teeth, and I cried out. He hummed, cursing and muttering delicious and obscene admirations against me.
The edge of my orgasm sharpened as he pushed one and then two fingers inside, doing what I sincerely hoped his cock would be doing to me in short order. I responded immediately, my body pushing to the very edge of the cliff. I needed this. I needed him. The pressure of his tongue on me increased, lavishing and tormenting me.
“Fuck. I’m... Oh fuck, I’m going to come.” I slammed my hand down on the desk and tightened helplessly, waiting for him to push me over.
“Do it, baby. Come all over my hand.” The words shot through me. His breath teased my wet skin, and I was at his mercy.
He pumped inside me, sucking my clit and punishing my G-spot until I cried out. I cursed, coming hard. My body quaked with the lingering shudders.
I was still coming when he stood. He lowered his shorts enough to free his cock. He was hard as stone, thick and so very ready for me. He wasted little time shoving into me. I bowed off the desk. The rush of him filling me sent my tapering orgasm back into overdrive.
“Fuck,” he groaned. The strain was evident in his features. “Jesus, you’re so fucking tight.”
I fluttered around him, tightening beyond control.
He hauled me up into his arms, lifting me off the desk completely only to drop me down onto his hard length. I tightened my legs around him, hoisting myself higher for better leverage.
He bit his lip. “You like that?”
“Love it,” I breathed.
He carried us a few steps to the wall, working me over his cock the whole way. I wasn’t sure how he managed it, but then again, he was a beast of a man and spent all day in the gym. My back hit the cool surface, giving him enough leverage to find new depths. His hands spread under my ass. He still held me up like I weighed nothing, He pinned my hips to the wall roughly as they met his.
“Oh God.” A shudder worked its way through me, my nipples hardening painfully against the laboring muscles of his chest. The brute force only added to my perilous climb. I loved that he could control my body so easily, take me to the edge of pain and still give me unspeakable pleasure.
“I want to hear you. Tell me what I do to you.”
My eyelids fluttered open. “I love you so much. I need you, Cam. So much.” I leaned in, crushing my lips against his until we were breathless.
His arms tightened around me. We were so close, wrapped up in each other, singularly held in this moment.
His answer was another series of punishing drives into my sensitive tissues. My core clenched, and I went slick allowing him to push deeper still. The bite of his depth was like an electric shock, a snap of mind-frazzling sensation that rendered me speechless and breathless every time he hit the end of me.
My lungs struggled for air. My nails scored down his shoulders. Every muscle froze as we bound ourselves tightly together, only the friction of his brutal entry over and again between us.
He held me with a possessive kiss, claiming my mouth with his, robbing us both of precious air.
“Maya.”
The hard rasp of his voice sent a shiver through me. Everything went into the background save the force of the climax as it raged over me. The voice I heard didn’t sound like my own as I screamed his name, letting him take us both over the edge.
He went still, a sweep of raw vulnerability softening his face. His lips parted with jagged breaths. The hot liquid of his release filled me as he held himself deep. I clung to him helplessly, wishing that somehow we could stay this way. Forever entwined, creating a new reality that I’d never need to escape from.
CAMERON. A rapidfire rattle echoed in the background of my mind. My muscles tightened, ready to act. Covered in sweat, I shot up, opening my eyes to the dark room.
Maya.
I reached over, finding only emptiness in the mess of sheets where she should have been. The inherent panic carried over, and worry churned inside me. Realization dawned as my eyes adjusted, taking in the familiar shapes of my room. My chest expanded on a long, sobering breath. Fuck.
I threw my legs over the edge of the bed and hung my head, willing my brain back to reality. Panic flitted through my veins. I was on high-alert, the way I’d been for days on end over the course of many years. The state of being was one I’d grown accustomed to. I couldn’t talk my brain out of it sometimes.
I rose slowly, making my way to the kitchen. I downed a glass of water. My breath finally slowed. I was far away from that life. I kept reminding myself. Yet a niggling irrational dread lingered that one day I’d wake up there again. The mere thought seized my gut. It was a dark hopeless feeling, a repetitive nightmare that wouldn’t quit. No way out. A prison all its own.
I slumped on the couch. Conscious enough to separate dreams from reality, I was now too awake and alert to sleep. I tried to relax. Closing my eyes, my thoughts drifted to Maya. A familiar ache filled me, the one that wanted her with me every minute that she could be. She’d gone back to her apartment after a few days, wanting to check in on Eli and get settled back into her usual work routine. Maybe it was the late nights loving her until we were utterly wasted, but having Maya in my bed kept the specters at bay.
I reached for my phone on the table, flipping through the photos until I found one of Maya. Her blond hair was pulled up tight, loose tendrils framing her face. Soft brown eyes stared back at me, full of hidden meaning. She was posing, dressed for the holiday party I’d nearly dragged her out of. After, I’d made love to her all night. God, I would again if she were here right now. I’d have my way with her, tell her how I loved her, how I never wanted her to go. Buried deep inside her, I’d make her believe it. She’d never doubt it.
I needed this woman. To possess her, to have the world know she was mine to love and to keep. To cherish.
I closed my eyes, memorizing the image in my mind as I drifted back to sleep.