If I felt like William was my home, I was wrong.
As Carson holds me tightly against him, the scruff on his chin burning the sensitive flesh of my neck, I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. I pull back and lean into him for the kiss I’m so desperate for. I need his mouth on mine. I need to feel more of him.
He stiffens and backs away before our lips meet. “Where’s William?” he asks. It feels wrong to be this far away from him after the little taste I just had.
I look away. “At the ball.”
“You just walked out and left him there?”
I shrug. “Sort of. I actually had a talk with your brother out by the pool where I came to many realizations. I ran into the ballroom, grabbed my clutch, and ran over here. I remembered your room number from when you said it last night and banked on the hope that you’d be here.”
He narrows his eyes at me. “What did my brother say, exactly?”
“He told me about the King family legend.”
Carson rolls his eyes, and I smile.
“It’s sweet,” I counter.
“It’s a ridiculous coincidence.”
“You think so?”
He shrugs.
“Then why haven’t you given up on me?”
He narrows his eyes at me. “Leave him. Be with me.”
“I will.” I step toward him, and he takes a step back.
He shakes his head and holds up both hands to stop me from coming closer. “I can’t, not until you’re free to be with me.”
My heart sinks and my body aches for him, but he’s right. William just proposed to me, and apparently I agreed to marry him. I shouldn’t be in another man’s hotel room. I nod.
He bends to pick up the bottle of whisky. Some spilled out, but the bottle didn’t break when it fell to the carpet. It’s not like he would’ve finished the bottle tonight, anyway. He clears his throat as he sets the bottle on a small table by the window. “I’m going back to New York tomorrow morning.”
My heart somehow sinks further. “Why?”
“I had my assistant book me the quickest flight out of town right after I watched you agree to be another man’s wife.”
“Don’t go.” I hear the desperation in my words.
“And…what? Stay here? Wonder what you’re doing, when you’re going to tell him? No thanks. I can do that from the comfort of my own home.”
“I’m telling him tonight. Come with me if you want. It’ll be over and then we can be together.”
He shakes his head. “You’ll need time. You’ll need a minute to be on your own, to separate your life from his…to think about what you’re doing and whether I’m the problem or the solution.”
“I won’t need time. I know what I want, Carson. I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”
He gazes at me longingly, his eyes searing a path from my chest to my legs and back up to my eyes. “I know what I want, too, but it’s not mine to have. Not yet.”
I step toward him, and he backs up a step. We follow this pattern until he’s up against the window and has nowhere else to go. I press my body to his without linking my arms around him. He doesn’t put his arms around me, either. He smells like whisky and the slightest hint of some expensive aftershave.
I press a kiss to the scruff of his chin and trail a path to his cheek. He groans softly, and I feel his erection grow harder against my stomach.
“It was yours the moment we met,” I whisper.
“Then go talk to him,” he says through gritted teeth. “End it with him.”
I back up a step. “Please don’t go back to New York. Please stay, just through the weekend. I need to know you’re here for me when I do end it, even if it’s not to jump immediately into your bed. I’ll need someone here to listen.”
“I can listen from New York. We’ll need to get used to that anyway.”
I nod in defeat. I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I’ve been stuck somewhere in the knowledge that it’s over with William and all I want is Carson.
But what will that look like, exactly? He’ll be my boss soon—in a few days, most likely. It’s just a waiting game at this point as each board member accepts King’s bid for shares. As soon as they accept and King Communications owns the controlling majority, it’s all over.
I need to stay here in San Diego. I need to help with this acquisition. I need to stay here for the people who depend on me at Baker Media.
And Carson needs to stay in New York. He’ll be taking over King Communications before the end of the year. That’s within the next six months.
I tried to convince my dad this is a good thing. I wanted to do anything I could to soften the blow, and convincing him that King is a reputable company who will do everything in their power to take care of our employees was my first step.
I draw in a deep breath. “I guess I should go.”
He nods. “I don’t want you to go, but you can’t stay. As soon as you’ve talked to him, call me. If you need anything, call me.”
“I need you to kiss me.”
“I’m trying so hard to do the right thing by you. I need to kiss you. I need to feel you.” His eyes darken. “I need to fuck you like I need air to breathe, but I won’t touch you until I know you’re only mine.”
My heart soars for this man I don’t even know, this man I somehow know better than anyone else does. “I’m already only yours,” I say softly.
He closes his eyes like he’s in pain. I don’t want to be the one inflicting pain on him, yet I am. I have been since the day we met, just like he’s been inflicting pain on me, but it’s the kind of hurt we need to experience to grow stronger, like the pain you feel the day after a particularly rough workout that strengthens your body. This pain is strengthening our hearts, tying them together and binding us in a way that no one else will ever know.
I lean forward and press another soft kiss to his scruff, loving the feel of him under my lips, wanting so much more. I memorize his scent. I memorize his heat in this proximity. I think about what’s hidden under that white t-shirt that I’ve seen and what’s hidden under those jeans that I haven’t.
“I’ll go,” I say. Disappointment washes over me, but he’s forcing me to do the right thing, and I know that while walking out of his hotel room is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, I’ll always appreciate the fact that he stopped me from doing something I shouldn’t be doing when I’m engaged to another man.
He blows out a breath and I step toward the door. I feel his eyes on me.
“Bye,” I say before I place my hand on the doorknob.
He strides across the large room toward me, his eyes hard and hot. He grabs my shoulder and turns me before shoving me up against the door. His lips are suddenly on my neck, his scruff rubbing fire against my skin.
I lean my head back to give him more skin to work with and close my eyes as I relish the feel of his tongue. Yes. This is what I want, a lifetime of this—Carson King’s tongue anywhere on my skin, taking me, owning me, loving me.
A soft grunt rumbles up from his chest. He forces himself away from me with a low growl, his eyes cast down to the floor.
“I…I’m sorry.” He looks up at me, and his eyes are so full of fire that I almost feel their burn. “I couldn’t let you walk out that door without knowing what you taste like.”
I don’t have words to respond to the lust he’s aiming at me, so I open the door and rush out before I do something I might regret in the morning.
As I walk down the hallway, I realize the third finger on my left hand is as bare as it was when this night began.
I left the fucking ring on the dresser in Carson’s hotel room.