The next day I visited the library to get some new books, but I texted Noa for some suggestions. I had just grabbed a stack of three and was sitting on a bench underneath the tree in the park when Levi walked over to me. “Reading anything good?”

I pulled down the book just enough so that my eyes could creep over it to take in Levi Jackson. “I thought we weren't speaking.”

He sat down next to me. “Yeah, I'm kind of over that. It was a really long time ago, we’re all adults now, silly to hold the past over you.”

I was shocked by his maturity. “Really?”

He laughed. “Not really. I still want to punch Eli in the fucking face, but I know I can't. Can't really go back to jail this year, can I?”

I nodded. “Well, good. Because I certainly can't afford to pay for your bail again.” I paused. “How’s your nose?”

“Not broken. Eli hit me hard but he overestimates his ability. It only bled for a few minutes.”

“Nice. The black eye looks good on you though, very badass.”

He smiled at me, his blue eyes shimmering in the sunlight. Levi was dreamy, there was no denying that. Dreamy and sexy as hell. Ugh, why did I have to fuck that one up so bad? “So what are you reading anyway?” he asked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you pick up a book for pleasure.”

I rolled my eyes. “I used to complain about reading in school because it was textbooks. I've always read for pleasure. I have a library card and everything.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry to offend you. A library card? Now you sound like a really serious reader.”

I smiled back at him flirtatiously. “Yeah, well, this book was suggested to me by a friend.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And who is the friend?”

“Who do you think?”

We both responded with Noa’s name at the same time. He laughed, a familiar sparkle returning to his eyes.

“Falling right back into your old ways, I see. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.”

I set down my book. “Now that's not fair. What happened with you and Eli…”

He interrupted me. “I'm just kidding, Lila. You’ve got your panties all up in a bunch, don't you?”

I sighed. “I guess that's the saying. I just hate how this all went down, okay?”

He shrugged. “Not for me to judge your choices, Lila. I only get to judge the ones from the past. I'm not really in your present. Yet.”

I noticed how he added yet to the end of his phrase. What did that mean?

“That’s my fault, I guess.”

We sat there for a moment contemplating what I just said. We both knew I was right.

“I mean, what I did with Eli, I forced you out of our relationship. I refused to take your calls, and I was wrong. I was so messed up at that time.”

He looked up at me and I prepared for the lecture of a lifetime. About how I was a horrible person, about how I had broken his heart. Everything. And what was worse was that I knew I deserved it all. Every last ounce of guilt. But then he shocked the hell out of me.

“Who could blame you? Your family was your whole world when we were together. I mean, it was you and me, and your family. I know you never saw it coming.”

I took a deep breath and closed my book. That wasn’t what I expected him to say. “No, I guess I really didn't. That night was awful, Levi. I just needed a release, some way to escape it all, and Eli was there. It was never directed at you. I don't know if it’ll make you feel better but it could've been anyone. It was never about Eli and me. Though I'm sure it doesn't look that way to you.”

He nodded. “You're right, it doesn't. But that's just the way Eli is, and I'm used to him and his bullshit. Wasn't the first time he stole one of my girlfriends. But when you left so soon, I knew that there was more going on, more than you could deal with. You never were very good at confrontation. It was one of the reasons I liked you. I never had to worry about getting into any fights.”

I smiled at him. “I still don't. I still run away when things get rough. It's my coping mechanism.”

“The best offense is to have a solid defense.”

I looked at him. “Did you just compare a sports reference to my life?”

He laughed. “Yeah I guess I did. I live and breathe football, always have. You know that. It doesn't really match you, though, does it? The famous musician, never much of an athlete.”

I pushed him jokingly. “I run! I’ve always run.”

He nodded. “Oh, don't think I forgot it. I can remember you challenging me to quite a few races in our day. I always tried to lose so I would be behind that sexy ass of yours. It still looks at good as ever.”

We were both astonished by his admission. Levi clearly still thought that I was attractive, and I couldn't deny his good looks. We stopped for a moment in awkward silence before he said, “I should go. Let you get back to your reading. Wouldn’t want you to get any ideas about us.”

“Levi.”

He just looked at me, but we both knew what I was going to say. I didn't need to say it. “I know, Lila. I know.”

I walked home, allowing the summer winds to make me feel like I was floating. Maybe they could take my problems away.