Kurt's cock was a perfect fit for my hand and a perfect fit for my mouth. I loved the way it felt in me, with its perfect girth and satisfying firmness. Mostly, though, I loved being in control of him. Not control in the sense that I could tell him what to do, but control in the sense that I could make him feel exactly how I wanted him to feel. I could take him on an erotic rollercoaster of ups and downs, loops, twists and turns.

It was through him I realized how mechanical and predictable sex had become for me. I knew what I wanted, and I got it. It hit the spot. It took care of a need.

This was something else. This was working with a fresh canvas, someone who’d never experienced any of this before. Or at least that's how he responded to me. I was in a new sports car and, rather than follow the manual, I was messing around behind the wheel, feeling the purr of the engine, and seeing just how hard I could push it.

And I had just begun.

He’d shot up when I started going down on him, breaking the rules of the game I’d established. I guess that meant he lost. And I won. His cock was my reward. And what a reward it was. I rubbed my tongue all over it, each lick eliciting a louder and louder moan from him. He put his hands on my face and then moved them up, pushing his fingers through my hair.

At once, he gripped my head and said, "Stop," not in a harsh tone, though there was an urgency to it. Don't wait a few seconds, it seemed to say. I need you to stop right now.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Too okay," he said. "I want to last."

I moved my head up and sat beside him on the couch.

"Just give me a minute or so. I need a breather. The feeling," he said. "Is too intense."

I laughed. It wasn't because what he said was funny, but I had no other way to express the joy I was feeling.

He didn't take it that way. "I'm serious."

"I know," I said.

"This is serious."

"Sure," I said. "But it doesn't mean we can't have a little fun. Did you enjoy the game?"

"It was torture," Kurt said. "And I loved every second of it."

"Me, too."

He took a few deep breaths, during which time I watched his chest move up and down and his abs tighten. It took all the strength I had not to rub my hands all over him, or jump on top of him, feeling his bare skin against mine.

I’d watched him with Old Leather back in the sauna. I knew what he was capable of. I hadn't even let him reach his full potential. I did the exact opposite, forcing him to stay still.

"I want you to take control," I said. Which was true even though I was enjoying having full rein over his body.

"I will," he said. "When it's time," and I shivered at the thought of him taking me and grabbing my hips, thrusting into me.

All good things to those who wait, I said to myself.

I didn't want to wait. I wanted to sit on his cock. I wanted to lube Kurt up and let him penetrate me right there on the couch.

He wasn't just an empty vessel. It wasn't just his physique that turned me on. It was that he was him. His strength was sexy, and I knew I could do whatever I wanted to him and not hurt him at all. But his vulnerability is what made him irresistible. I saw him wipe away a tear, then look away from me.

"It's nothing," he said.

"You're crying."

"I'm not crying. I'm tearing. It's something I do sometimes when I'm happy," another started to form. I leaned forward and kissed it off of his cheek. "I just don't remember the last time it happened. I must have been a kid. A teenager, probably. Definitely not since I joined the service."

I was concerned. Maybe I was moving too fast with my new toy. Maybe he wasn't ready for all this at once. "How are you doing?" I asked.

He looked at me and touched my face, then put his hand through my hair one more time, pomade rubbing off on his fingers. "You have such beautiful hair," he said. "I can't believe I'm saying that to a guy, but it's true. You have beautiful hair. Why haven't I told you that before? Why haven't I told any man that before? I feel like I've only been living as half a person until now."

He didn't answer the question, so I asked it again. "Are you doing okay?"

"Beau," he said, "I can't remember ever having been as happy as I am right now. I could die happy right here," he sat on that thought for a second. "That's not right. For the first time in my life, I'm afraid to die. I don't want to die. I don't want to miss a moment of you."

He wasn't after me for my riches or my fame. He barely even knew who I was, in the public eye. "You don't even know me."

"Not really," he said, "but I want to."

"What do you want to know?"

He shook his head. "Everything. But, right now, nothing. I just want to feel you against me."

He pulled me down on top of him and I felt his warmth. Our penises touched, and I felt a burst of happiness flow through my body as I moved my mouth back to his, leaning on the couch until he rolled us over and we fell to the floor with him on top. He moved his mouth against my chest, exploring me the same way I’d explored him, trying to take his time. His eagerness took control and he moved south, biting my hip, reaching his hands around my ass, and grabbing me.

"I want..." he paused as if the words were still forming in his mouth, as if he was speaking a new language and wanted to be certain he was saying it correctly. "I want your cock."

"I want yours," I said.

He pushed me down and took me in his mouth, returning the favor from before, squeezing my ass as I went deeper and deeper into his throat.

He gagged and pulled his mouth off of me, coughing.

"Jesus," he said. "It's harder than it looks."

"Take it slow," I said. "Don't be afraid to use your hands."

He took note, focusing on the tip, letting his hand do the work on the rest of me. The feeling was intense, all his focus on one particular part of me, the part with the most sensation. I couldn't hazard a guess as to the number of mouths I've put my cock in. Some people had no idea what they were doing, others turned it into a fine art. With Kurt, it was different. There was the joy of discovery. He had no idea what he was doing, it was his first time, but he made up for lack of experience with pure enthusiasm. He was pulling moves I didn't think possible with his tongue, exploring with rhythms I'd never felt before, vibrating his lips like a machine. It was exhilarating.

At the same time, it was unfair, his focusing on my pleasure. He was the guest. It was his first time. He deserved to be at the center of everything. This should be about his enjoyment.

I nudged his head off me. "Lie down, Kurt. Flat on your back."

I got off the couch and allowed him the space to lie down. I opened up a cabinet attached to the wall and pulled out a condom and a small package of lube, then walked over to him.

"I'm going to make you come," I said. "I want you to come harder than you've ever come before."

I opened the condom and rolled it onto him, then coated it with lube to make it slick.

"You ever do this before?" I asked. "Anal?"

He shook his head.

"Gentle at first. Let me control it. Don't thrust until I tell you it's okay."

"Got it."

"You ready?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said, not even trying to hide his eagerness in his voice.

"Here we go."

I climbed on top of him, positioned myself over him, my legs folded upward. Then, with careful finesse, I sat down and allowed him to penetrate me. First just the tip, then slowly the rest of him, as far into me as he could go. I let out a sigh of pure ecstasy, then pumped my body up and down on top of him a few times.

"You ready to take control?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Take me, Kurt. Fuck me slow but fuck me hard."

He pushed me up, so I was leaning against the arm of the couch, then he thrust his hips against my ass as hard as he could, slamming his whole weight into me.

"You're going to make me come," he said.

"Hold off as long as you can," I wanted it to last.

He slapped my ass, then grabbed my hips, pulling me towards him, allowing me to feel all of his strength.

I wanted to make him come so badly. I wanted this moment to last forever, but more than that, I wanted him to empty his load into that condom inside of me. And I wanted it now.