TEN
Kayne carried Gracie as they made their way into the Westgate Plaza's city-center. Though crowded, the place was a veritable ghost town compared to what it would be in a few hours. Jessica had a firm grip on Ash and Isabelle's hands, keeping them close, so he wasn't surprised when Maddy fell in beside him and hesitantly reached for his. He looked down to see the hope and doubt in her pretty green eyes. “Is this okay?” they silently asked.
Kayne squeezed her hand in reassurance, and her little face lit up with delight. His chest tightened in response. Kayne knew to the outside world they looked like a happy family, and that scared the shit out of him. He took a deep breath, trying to fight off the panic. He wasn't going to stick around long enough for anyone to get attached.
Gracie kissed his cheek, pulling him out of his dark thoughts. “What was that for?”
“No be sad, a'kay?” she said.
“I wasn't sad, just thinking.”
She looked doubtful and kissed him again. The more time he spent with her, the more she reminded him of Natalia. God, he needed to know who she was before he got involved any deeper. Which meant he needed to find some alone time with Jessica. A dangerous proposition in and of itself. His body refused to accept the message that she was off limits. Somehow Kayne had to get the idea of fucking her out of his mind. He couldn't let it happen. Both of them would be hurt when he walked away. And walk away he would.
Eventually they chose a place for dinner, then headed toward the arena at the far end of Westgate.
“Where are we sitting?” Kayne hadn't thought to ask earlier, just thrilled with the idea of going to a playoff game with Jessica and the kids.
Jessica shrugged and stepped up to the will call window. “Somewhere on the lower level. I was told they were really good seats.”
The attendant took Jessica's identification. “Ma'am, if you and your party will step over there, someone will be right with you.” He picked up his radio and asked for a club representative.
That piqued Kayne’s curiosity. “Is there a problem?”
“No, sir. I'm sorry for the delay. If you'll please just step over there out of the way, someone will be right with you.”
A moment later, a man in a suit walked up to them. “Ms. Hallstatt, I apologize for the delay. I’m David Williams, the Concierge Manager. I understand our GM is an acquaintance of yours. He's asked me to personally ensure that you and your party are taken care of tonight. If you'll follow me, I'll escort you in.”
Kayne looked to Jessica, who shrugged. She seemed as surprised as he was over the VIP treatment.
Kayne couldn't remember the last time he'd enjoyed just being some place. No. That wasn't true. He'd taken his family to the hills on one of those rare warm winter days a few weeks before they died. They'd had a picnic in a meadow, and he'd played with his children until they'd worn themselves out. Afterwards, he'd lain down with them on a blanket, and his son had whispered, “I love you, Papa,” before drifting off to sleep.
Damn! He didn't want to think about that. Not now. He sure as hell didn't want to remember how Oksana had laid their baby on his chest and curled up beside him, just to be close and talk. Kayne shoved the unwanted memory away before it fully formed, and focused on the present.
Williams stopped in front of a souvenir shop. “If you'd like to pick out a souvenir now, I can have them autographed before you leave tonight.”
“Seriously?” Jessica gasped. “The kids would love that.”
“All five of us.” Kayne chuckled pointing to himself as one of the kids.
Jessica rolled her eyes. “By all means, lead the way Peter Pan.”
***
Nearly an hour later, drinks and snacks in hand, they followed Williams down the concourse and through a short tunnel into the lower seating area. The man kept walking right up to the glass, then toward center ice.
Holy hell!
Most hockey fans would sell their soul to be sitting at the glass, center ice, during any game, much less the playoffs. Jess was momentarily speechless. She’d never imagined anything like this when she'd called in the favor for tickets.
Kayne ushered them into the aisle in front of him. “I'll take the end seat, if that's okay?”
Jess knew it was the die-hard cop putting himself between them and danger, but she couldn't resist a little ribbing. She laughed. “Wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that that’s the center line seat, would it?”
“No, of course not.” His expression was pure innocence.
Jess had planned on sitting at the opposite end to be the other “kid goalie” but when an argument broke out over who got to sit by Kayne, Jess solved the problem diplomatically. She took the seat herself.
It seemed like such a good idea until she realized how much room Kayne took up. His leg and arm constantly brushed against hers, making it difficult to concentrate on one of the most spectacular games she'd ever seen.
Kayne amazed her. As focused as he was on the game, he never lost track of the kids. The moment one of them left their seat, he had his eye on them, and he didn't get angry if it took his attention away from the game. Jess couldn't help but feel disloyal to Jarred when she realized she was measuring him against what she saw in Kayne. The simple truth couldn't be avoided: Jarred never would have taken her and the kids to something like this, much less been a good sport about it.
Jess was on the edge of her seat as the last few seconds of the third period wore down. The Coyotes were ahead by one, but the Redwings had the puck.
“5, 4, 3, 2...1!” Everyone erupted in cheers. The 'Yotes had won.
Before she realized how or why, Jess was in Kayne's arms. He lifted her off the ground, hugging her close. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, and she was kissing him, or kissing him back, she wasn't quite sure. Lost in the moment, she didn't care.
***
Kayne found his arms full of luscious female, not certain how she'd gotten there. The initial kiss only lasted a moment, barely long enough to register her soft lips against his firm ones. But the feel of her body? Her arms wrapped firmly around his neck, those tight thighs snug against his hips, his hands cupping her ass—Oh yeah. That was Richter Scale worthy. He couldn't resist dipping his head for another taste of her sweetness. The world all but disappeared around them as she melted into him.
The Redwing's player being checked against the glass directly in front of them broke the spell, and Kayne set her down and stepped away. Holy hell, he was not into public displays, and he'd all but devoured her in front of God and everybody. As penance, his jeans were suddenly about three sizes too small.
Williams materialized next to him. “That was some game.”
“It was incredible.” Almost as good as that kiss. Shit!
“Would you like to meet the players?” Williams asked.
“Most assuredly!” Kayne picked up a sleeping Isabelle—how she'd managed to sleep through all that noise he had no idea—and followed Jessica, who held Gracie, and the other kids, out onto the ice.
***
Jess stood back and watched while Kayne intermingled with the players, shaking hands and introducing the kids. She was amazed that he included them. Jarred would have insisted she keep the kids off the ice so he could interact with the players. Ha, who was she kidding? He would have insisted she and the kids stay home and taken four of his buddies to the game. In his opinion, an event like this shouldn't be wasted on children who wouldn't appreciate it. And she would have given in to keep the peace.
What was it about Kayne that made him so different? Was it just because he missed his own children that he was so attentive to hers, or would he have treated his the same? Would he be the same way with her, or would he turn out to be like Jarred in that aspect? Was she willing to find out? She was pretty sure he wanted her in his bed, but was that all he wanted? If so, was she willing to settle for sex without a relationship? She of all people knew a marriage license meant nothing when it came to commitment and fidelity.
***
Hours later, Kayne found himself back in Jessica’s kitchen. “Thank you for today, Jessica.”
The kids had fallen asleep within moments of climbing into the Tahoe, and Jessica had followed not long after. It had been a quiet drive, giving Kayne some much needed time to think. Though a part of him—the selfish bastard who had enjoyed today more than he'd had any right to—was glad he hadn't been given the opportunity to find out more about Gracie. The other part of him, the honorable part, was disgusted that he was worming his way into this family's life and vice versa. Every moment he spent with them provided not only the children, but Jessica, as well, an opportunity to get attached. How could he be so selfish?
“It’s okay to call me Jess, everyone who knows me does.”
He nodded, but doubted he would. He needed to keep distance between them any way he could.
“The kids had a really good time. So did I.”
She moved a little closer, and Kayne had to fight everything in him to stand still. He wanted to run almost as badly as he wanted to take her into his arms. “I should probably go, it's really late.” He took a step backward. The flash of disappointment that crossed her face firmed up his resolve. He needed to get out of there.
“Oh, wait a minute.” She reached for her purse. “Let me give you your ticket. You do keep them, right?”
“Yeah.” Kayne accepted the ticket stub, pulled out his wallet, and flipped it open, intending to put it inside. He paused, staring at the picture of his family. He'd taken it that day in the meadow. Oksana held their baby, while Natalia sat on her lap, and Niki stood beside her. All he had to do was turn his wallet around and show the photo to Jessica. Would she see Gracie, or would she see a child with similar features?
“Kayne, are you okay?” Her voice was soft with concern.
No, he wasn't. He couldn't do this. Where would it leave him when she confirmed that there was no possible way Grace was his missing daughter?
“I have to go, Jessica.” Before he could beg her to let him stay, to let him be a part of her life, of her children's, before he could admit, even to himself, that maybe, just maybe, it didn't matter so much who Gracie really was, he got the hell out of there.