Her hand still fits into mine so perfectly. She’s my pretty little flower, but she’s too good for me. I feel like I could break her, and that fucking hurts me. I can’t let that happen. I have to prove to her that she’s doing the right thing being here with me.

The right thing…

Those words feel like a joke. Have I ever done the right thing? Everything is such a fucking mess, and the more time I spend with her, the more kisses I give her and the more I apologize and try to show her that I need her, the more I feel myself breaking apart.

After seeing Alec and the baby, things crystallized for me. I began to realize that I’d done the right thing, and I’d done the wrong thing. There was no easy choice. There was no right choice. There was no correct answer, and there was no way I would ever be able to right the wrongs that I’ve committed.

“Are you sure we should be doing this?” Daisy asks. Her hand squeezes mine slightly. She’s careful not to hold onto me too hard. She wants to keep her distance, even though I have her hand in mine. She still wants to keep herself removed.

I don’t blame her. I’d do the same thing.

I’ve done the same thing. I’ve kept my distance from the ones who have wronged me.

I’ve kept my distance from myself.

“It’s okay,” I say, moving her gently in front of me as we make our way carefully over the rough ground. “There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

The rock quarry is about a quarter mile from the main road. The path is unmarked, but I know my way along the terrain. A path has been beaten from the main road to the clearing inside the forest from years of kids making their way out here for whatever the hell it is they want to do.

Today, it’s filled with water. It’s like a man-made beach, except the shore is made of hard rocks and stone instead of grains of pure white sand.

Our footing becomes unsure as we gradually make our way from the dirt and moss that cover most of the ground near the road, to the rocks that pave our way as we approach the clearing of the quarry. I put one hand on her waist to guide her, my other one cutting a path of light in front of her from the flashlight I brought with me. The moon isn’t enough tonight. She needs me tonight, too.

Her feet slide a little on a stone that’s wet with dewy moss, but I hold onto her tightly, but still gently. I don’t let her fall.

“Sorry,” she sighs as she regains her footing. “It’s a little bit slippery.”

“It’s okay,” I reassure her. “Not too much farther now.”

We finally get to the clearing, where the moonlight ricochets off the water and makes everything white and pure. She turns around to me and sits down on the edge of a rock. My swollen heart pains when I see that she isn’t smiling.

“This is so nice,” she says, forcing the corners of her mouth up. “It’s really pretty.”

She turns her face away from me, her long brown hair cascading down her back, pooling up inside the hood of her sweatshirt. She looks vulnerable, almost afraid...almost. But there’s a strength inside her that I’ve always admired. There’s something in her that’s not going to allow her to get hurt again.

It doesn’t matter, though. She doesn’t have to be strong. Not around me. She can let down her defences because I will not hurt her again.

“It is pretty out here.” I sit down on a rock next to her. The night is cool and damp, the smell of the forest mixing with the water makes my heart swell with nostalgia.

There’s a reason she’s never been out here before. I know she’s never been out here. I don’t even have to ask. The nostalgia I feel makes me feel ashamed. It’s the memory of the past, all the good times that gave me so much pleasure and let me escape from all the shit that was going on at home, but it’s the memory of the things I’ve done wrong, too.

“There used to be a tire swing out here,” I say. “It was attached with a rope to a branch on one of these trees.”

I look up, searching for the tree the rope used to hang from, but I can’t find it. It looks like the branches over the water have been cut down. They probably did it so kids would be deterred from coming out here. The tire swing was one of the best parts about the quarry. I’d climbed up on there so many times, and I felt my body become free as I swung over the water. Even though my mind was tethered to the ground, my body felt free. And that gave a little bit of relief, if only for a minute.

“I can’t imagine that being safe,” Daisy says, pulling her hoodie around her tighter.

She’s right. It wasn’t safe. It was an absolute hazard. Maybe that’s why I loved being out here so much.

“I know,” I say, teasing her.

“That’s probably why Dad told me to never come out here,” she says, flashing a small smile at me over her shoulder. “Not that I even knew how to get here if I wanted.”

“You mean none of the bad boys ever tried to corrupt you?” I smile, knocking against her shoulder with mine. I want to elicit a laugh, but she looks down at her hands and shakes her head.

“No,” she says in a small, hushed voice. “None of the bad boys ever tried to corrupt me.”

Seeing her like this is like poison to my soul.

I take her hand in mine and she softens, just slightly. She’s still guarded.

“Talk to me, Daisy,” I say. I put my lips on her cheek, and I feel her touch warm up to mine. “Tell me what’s going on inside your head.”

She turns her face slightly to mine, and the moon glows inside her irises. She’s everything, she’s all around me. But still, she doesn’t speak.

She just closes her eyes as I bend forward toward her. She allows her lips to brush against mine. She’s barely there, but I can feel her softness against me. She says nothing, but she’s communicating everything to me right now. I press my mouth against hers harder, taking her lips with mine. She tastes the same as she did a year go, and eight years ago when I first touched her.

She was my first and my only; I know what her father told her, though. I knew from the way he looked at me. I knew he thought I was bad.

He was right. But I wasn’t bad like that. I would never put my lips or my cock near another woman. Not since her. Not since I had my Daisy.

I’m lost in her kiss, but still, I can feel her tears running down her cheeks and staining my lips. I can taste them. The hot, salty tears run down and stain her face.

“No,” I say, pulling my mouth away from her, taking her face in my hands. I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. Seeing her cry isn’t making me any less hard. I’m still as hard as a fucking rock for her, even when I see her in pain. Being with her won’t be easy. I see that. I understand that now. I don’t know if I ever understood that before, because I didn’t want to. But now, I understand that I won’t be able to take her pain away quickly and easily. But I’m not going to stop trying.

“I don’t know,” she says. I haven’t asked her anything. But I know she’s answering a question that’s remained unsaid.

“You want to know, don’t you?” I slip my thumbs under her eyes, brushing her tears away. “You want to know what happened, don’t you?”

“Yes,” she cries out softly. “I need to know.” She looks up at me, her blue eyes shining. “Did you do what you confessed to?”

I swallow hard, the guilt from what I put her through swelling on the inside of my chest. It fills me.

“No,” I say roughly. “I didn’t do it.”

Daisy pulls away from me and crosses her arms across her chest roughly. I don’t know if she’s repulsed by me or just trying to comfort herself. Maybe it’s a little bit of both.

“Let me tell you what happened,” I plead. I don’t know if it’s going to be any use. But damn it, I won’t stop trying to explain. I’m ready now. I can’t hold back any longer.

I can’t. Not if it means losing her again.

Her head hangs down, her long, white neck exposed to the cool night air. Her pure skin tempts me. I want to reach out and touch her, comfort her, make her feel good and moan my name as she cums. She doesn’t belong here. Not like this. We should be here under better circumstances. We should be here together, happy, not like this. We aren’t even together. I don’t know what the fuck it is we’re doing right now.

Her body tenses up and she looks over to me.

“You didn’t commit the robbery?”

“No,” I say plainly, defeated. “I didn’t. But that doesn’t mean I’m not guilty. It doesn’t mean I deserve you.”

“God, Travis,” she says, laughing through her tears. “I don’t even know what that means anymore. So tell me. Tell me, please.”

My body tenses up as I rise to my feet. Clouds are starting to gather in the sky, blotting out the light from the moon. The water isn’t lit up anymore. Everything’s starting to go dark. I didn’t even realize it as it was happening.

I should send myself plummeting down into the rocks below. I should let them break my body. I should rid her of me once and for all.

But I look down at her, at her pleading eyes. She hasn’t given up on me. She hasn’t. She could have, so many times.

“I did it for Alec,” I breathe. It’s a confession. But it’s a perverse confession. It’s twisted and wrong, because I’m finally coming clean about a sin I didn’t commit. I’m finally clearing the air and clearing my own name. And I don’t care if she’s the only one who knows the truth. She deserves it. She needs to know.

“But…” She shakes her head back and forth quickly, trying to make sense of what I’ve told her. “What? What the hell?”

“Alec committed the robbery. I was with him, though.” My words bring me back to that night. The headlights flashing and cutting off, the beams of light from the streetlamps, the way I pulled my ride against the curb and made it so we wouldn’t be seen.

Adrenaline courses through my veins and I feel my jaw clench and go hard, bringing me back to that night. “I didn’t do anything to stop him. I was complicit.”

Daisy flies to her feet and stands in front of me, her shoulders tensed. But there are no tears coming from her eyes anymore. Now all I see between us is red. It’s anger.

“You were thinking of what was best for him?” she hisses. “You were thinking of what he had to lose?”

I try to put my hands on her shoulders, but she shrugs them away.

“Did you think about me for even a second?” Her voice comes out so calmly. She sounds so rational. She doesn’t sound angry at all. And that fucking terrifies me.

“Of course I thought of you,” I respond slowly. “I thought of all the bad things I’ve done in my life and how I’d never be worthy of you. Ever.”

“Then why the hell did you propose to me, Travis? Why? Why?” She throws her fists against my chest and pounds against me. I can feel her anger. Her rage. I did this to her.

I did this to myself.

This is my fault.

I take her wrists in my hands and pull her close to me. She can’t strike me. She can’t move. I feel her energy wane as she looks up at me and softens in my hands.

“Why?” she glowers.

“Because I love you. Because I want you.”

“How did you think leaving me and going to prison for a year would show that to me?” She blinks as the clouds in the sky drift past the moon, illuminating us again, casting a cool white light over everything.

My heart thrums in my chest as I consider her question. She’s looking at me like I’m crazy. Maybe I fucking am.

“I thought I had to pay for what I did. Make up for it.”

“Travis, you’re a good man. I don’t know what my father said to you or made you believe, but I love you for who you are.”

“It’s not his fault. Don’t blame him. It’s my fault. It’s my fault, and mine alone.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

I break free from her and thrust my hands down at my sides.

“My parents. I should have done more for my mom. I should never have let my father hurt her.”

I’ve never talked about this to anyone. Ever. I’ve kept this so fucking bottled up, and it was liable to explode at any moment. I thought I’d squashed it when I went away. I thought I’d finally put an end to it. But I didn’t. Pushing it down only make the poison more potent. It only made the sickness inside me swell, and now it’s spilling over. Contaminating me. Fucking me up.

“Travis.” Daisy’s voice is gentle and small. She’s trying to comfort me. She’s trying to take away my pain. Her hand comes down on my hand, and she slips her fingers through mine. “There was nothing you could have done. You were, what, fifteen when your dad left?”

“Yeah,” I say, rubbing my forehead. “Fifteen.”

“You were just a kid. It wasn’t your fault.” Her voice aches for me. Her words ache for what I’ve done, for the mistakes I’ve made.

I feel myself grow hard on the inside. I’ve tried to tell her about this before. I’ve tried to talk to Alec about it, fuck, even my own mom. But now there’s one less person for me to talk to about it. Two, if you count Alec, because even though he’s my friend, I can never talk about this with him. Not now. Not since I took the fall for him. The scales between us are even now, and confiding in him about this will only put a burden on his shoulders.

That’s why I never wanted to tell Daisy about this. I thought I could deal with it on my own. I don’t need anyone feeling sorry for me. I don’t need her feeling my grief.

But I’ve caused her grief through my actions.

I’ve really fucked this up.

“I felt like it was my fault.” I breathe heavily in the night air. “I felt like I could have done something to stop him. You know, the night he left, he said that I was the man of the house now, and to take good care of Mom. And that fucking tore through me. Because he treated her like shit, and there was nothing I could do to stop him. It was like that fucker was mocking me. He was trying to get inside my fucking head. And I played that shit over and over in my head. I never stopped.”

I close my eyes and feel Daisy sit down on the rock next to me. Her soothing touch on my back makes me breathe a little easier. It’s only a little bit, but it matters. Every little second with her, even touch, every glance, it fucking means something.

“You did everything you could,” she says. Her fingers curl up and she presses her nails along my back. “You did everything for her.”

“I didn’t, though,” I say. “I couldn’t always be there for her. When the cancer took her, I wasn’t there. I was out. I was working.”

“You were doing the right thing,” Daisy says. “You had to work. You had to keep the house. It was for her.”

“It wasn’t enough.”

I feel my words rumble through me.

“Sometimes everything you do isn’t enough,” she reassures me, “and that’s okay.”

“It’s not okay,” I say, my voice heating. “I thought going away would make me fucking worthy enough for you. If your father thinks I’m some piece of shit, then I did my time, I did my penance. Is that enough for him?”

Daisy sighs deeply, her breath coming out in raggedly.

“Travis, you didn’t have to do that. I never judged you. I took the ring you gave me. I loved you too.”

“Loved me?” I ask. I turn to her and her lips pull up at the corners. This time, the smile reaches her eyes.

“I did love you, yes,” she replies. “I still do. There’s a reason I didn’t give you the ring back before you left.”

“Then why did you give it back to me when I got out?”

She lets out a small laugh and looks up at me.

Her bright blue eyes are like gemstones. But the pain is still there.

“I was angry. I was confused. While you were in there, I went over that night a million times in my head. I started to question my own memory, my own idea of what happened. I thought I could save you, and I started to blame myself for not standing up for you. I should have gone to my father and told him you were covering for someone. I should have told him you were incapable of what you said you did.”

“Baby.” I pull her close to me and put my arms around her, her tear-stained cheek pressing against my shoulder. Kissing her hair, I pull her onto my lap. Her body falls against me and I cradle her and rock her. “I wasn’t ready before. Now I am.”

I move her hips and put her down on my lap, straddling me. Her body heats against mine and our lips crush together in an explosive kiss that ignites me from the inside. My cock steels inside my pants and I feel her grind against me, her body begging me to give it to her.

“I’m ready too,” she breathes. “I’m ready for everything. For anything. Just...just don’t hurt me again.”

My heart clenches as I struggle for a moment. Can I swear to her that I’ll never hurt her again? Can I swear to her that I’ll always be the man she can lean on? Rely on? Trust to be there forever?

I broke her trust once before. But I was fucking stupid. I thought it would make me worthy enough for her. I thought it would balance out the fucking scales of the universe and make me clean. But it doesn’t work like that. It doesn’t fucking work like that.

“I won’t hurt you again, Daisy.” I pull her close to me and guide us down to sit on a rock, crushing my mouth into hers like it’s the first time again. And it feels like the first time. Every kiss, every glance, it always feels like the first time with her. But it’s familiar, too. It’s like we’ve always been part of each other. Tied together. Intertwined, forever. Not just by an accident of birth. I could have been born next door to any girl.

But any other girl wouldn’t be Daisy.

My blooming flower, my delicate love. I can’t hurt her again. I won’t.

“I know,” she breathes. “And I won’t let you let me down again. I should have fought for us harder too, Travis.”

I guide her into my lap and she slowly wraps her legs around my waist. I’m so hard for her already, and I take her lips with mine. Her arms come up in an embrace, wrapping tight around my back.

“It wasn’t your fault, Daisy.”

My fingers go to the zipper on her hoodie, and I slowly begin to pull it down. A shadow falls over the perfect skin on her gorgeous neck, and when I pull the zipper down farther, a small moan comes from her perfect lips. She isn’t wearing a bra - all that’s underneath is a thin tank top. I push the hoodie off her shoulders and kiss her collarbone, bringing her body closer to me.

“That feels so good,” she moans.

“I dreamed of this every fucking night,” I growl. “You’re perfect.”

She grinds against me in my lap, straddling me, the friction between our bodies heating up. I slip my finger under one of the straps on her tank top, pulling it down over her flawless skin as my mouth moves lower.

“Wait,” she whispers. My cock is so hard, so ready for her. I want to tear her clothes off her. Daisy puts her fingers at the edge of her tank top and pulls it up over her head, letting her perfect breasts come free. “That’s better.”

“Fuck,” I groan into her ear. She moves in my lap, pushing herself against me. She gazes up at me, breathing heavily. I know what she wants; I know what drives her fucking crazy. It makes me crazy too, to see her like this.

I move my mouth down to her neck and kiss her gently, letting my fingers press against the skin of her chest, taking one of her tiny pink nipples between my thumb and forefinger, rolling it against my rough skin. Her breath hitches deep inside her throat and she trembles, her chest falling against me.

“I just want to make you feel good,” I whisper in her ear. “I can’t take away the pain I’ve caused you. Not all at once. But I can make you feel good day by day.”

I put my lips on her neck, making a trail of kisses to the soft spot behind her ear. She exhales shakily, her body melting into me. My fingers find a lock of hair and I tug at it gently, and she giggles, but the sound turns into something else as I push my other hand down her stomach.

“Do you want it?” I stop, waiting for her answer. I know what she’s feeling. Now that we’ve talked, though, I want her to tell me that she still wants me to make her feel the way I’ve always been able. I want her to tell me she needs my touch. And no one else’s.

“Yes, Travis,” she says, her eyes trailing up to mine. “I want it.”

I push my fingers down into her jeans. I can’t fucking take it. I find her wet clit and trace my finger against it. My cock is on fire and I need to bury myself deep inside her, but I want to make her beg for it first. I want her to know how serious I am about her tonight. I can’t make her trust me again all at once, but I can make her beg for my cock. I can take this one step at a time, one night at a time, until she’ll wear my ring again.

Her teeth come down on her bottom lip and her eyes grow larger, her brows knitting together in a silent plea to take her. To take her here and now, under the moonlight, where no one will find us.

I trace two fingers slowly along her clit, pressing them onto either side of it, circling against her. I’ve never felt her wetter or hotter or more ready for me.

“You do want it, don’t you?” I whisper into her ear. There’s no one around, but I want to make sure she’s the only one who can hear. Everyone will know she’s mine again soon enough, but right now, she’s the only one who I want to know. My words are for her, and only for her.

“Yes,” she whimpers. “I want it.”

“Tell me how bad you want it.” My hand comes around to the back of her neck and I tilt her head back slightly, kissing the pure, exposed flesh on her neck. “Tell me.”

“I want you inside me,” she pleads. “I missed you. I was angry, but I missed you.”

“Tell me what you thought about,” I say. It fucking hurts. I should never have been away from her. I should never have made her fantasize about me. I should have taken her body every single night and never let her go.

“I thought about you coming over to my house like you used to,” she says. “I thought about you coming into my room in the dark. How we used to not turn the lights on. I thought about how it was before we fucked. When we just kissed. How it was a secret between us.”

I press my fingers against her clit as she grinds against me softly, then push my fingers into her, past her tight folds, into her velvet, perfect flesh.

“It’s not going to be a secret anymore, baby. Not anymore.” I pull her mouth to mine, kissing her lips with the pent-up desire of the last year. Every kiss I’ve given her since getting out has been nothing compared to this. Each kiss I’ve shared with her has been incredible, but without her love, there was something missing. It was there all along, and I knew it. I just needed to hear her say it.

She makes my cock hard, and she makes my heart so fucking soft - ready and open to take her love. All of it.

I finally feel good enough for her. I finally feel that I can take her all the way.

“Show me,” she glowers up at me. “Show me what I’ve been missing. Bring it out into the light. I don’t want it to be a secret anymore.”

She stands up, her lusciously curvy hips tempting me toward her. I bring my mouth to her belly and kiss her flesh, bringing her jeans down slowly over her ass, running my hands over her curves.

“Sit down, baby,” I say as her shorts hit the ground. I quickly undo my belt and let the zipper on my jeans fall, taking my cock out for her. “Let me show you what you’ve been missing.”

Her eyes trail down from mine and reach my cock as she steps forward. Her chest rises and falls, and I reach out to take her hips in my hands, guiding her into my lap. She presses herself onto my cock, slowly coming down as I spear into her.

“I love you,” I whisper into her ear as she comes down onto me.

I grind into her, regretting the past year, but thankful for it. It was a mistake, but I had to do it. My confusion begins to melt away, though, as I take her in my arms and we move together.

This is where I belong. This is where I’ll stay.

Her breathing becomes heavier as I slam myself into her over and over. Her moans fill the night air, and I don’t try to stop her.

“Travis,” she moans. That’s what I need; that’s what I want. My chest grows hot with my growing desire for her, my cock full and heavy inside her. I want my name painted on her lips, her body satisfied but wanting more and craving me every single day.

“You’re mine, baby,” I whisper into her ear. She mewls onto my lips as her face turns to mine, our lips moving together as our bodies heat.

I feel her begin to cum, her thighs pressed up around my body, her pussy tight with my fullness inside her.

I wrap her hair up in my fingers, my fist drawing up her long, luscious brown hair at the nape of her neck. She’s naked except for my hand on the back of her neck, pulling at her hair gently, making her crazy as she cums.

She pulls away from me, putting her mouth on my neck, moaning into my skin. Her pussy squeezes up on my full length and I cum hard, shooting myself deep into her.

This is what I’ve wanted. This is what I’ve been waiting for.

“Daisy,” I say as her head falls against her chest. I loosen my grip on her long hair and press my palm to the back of her neck. “I’m yours.”