T here was a crick in my neck. The first thought I had as I started to climb my way towards wakefulness didn't make any sense. Why did my neck hurt? Then I realized I was slumped over. My back bent and my head down, like I'd fallen asleep sitting up. Why would I have done that ?

Even as I thought the question, everything came back in one excruciating rush. Cade telling me he loved me. Waking up with a note saying he'd be back. The hours of worrying. Arriving at the loft. Seeing the torn pictures. Then Cade on the bed with a man next to him. Realizing Cade wasn't breathing. Performing CPR. The ride to the hospital .

I was in the hospital, sitting next to a bed. I must've fallen asleep at some point while I'd been waiting for Cade to wake up .

Then I felt fingers tighten around mine and my heart stuttered. Cade .

I opened my eyes and looked up to find a pair of dark gray ones staring at me. Relief rushed through me so sharply that tears formed in my eyes. I grasped his hand tightly .

“Hey there, Sleeping Beauty.” His voice was weak, but it was there and that's what was important .

I threw myself at him, heedless of the wires and tubes connecting him to monitors and bags of whatever. I didn't care about any of that. I just had to have my arms around him, feeling him breathing, his heart beating. I pressed my face against his chest .

“I'm okay,” he whispered as he stroked my hair .

I didn't cry. Not really. A couple tears escaped, but that was all. I'd spent everything last night. Now, I was just exhausted. The little sleep I'd gotten was only enough to keep me from passing out, and this weariness wasn't just physical. Between everything that had happened the night before and then today, my emotions had taken me on a roller coaster ride like nothing I'd ever experienced before .

“Don't ever scare me like that again.” My voice was muffled against his chest .

“I won't,” Cade said. “Believe me .”

I let myself relax against him for a few more minutes, not wanting to break the silence with the questions I was trying to avoid. No need to create more drama. We'd had enough to last quite a while. I just wanted to listen to the steady beating of his heart, echoed by the beeping from the monitor. I couldn't even find the sound annoying. Not when it was reassuring me that he was okay .

“There are some things I need to tell you,” he said softly .

I sighed. Apparently my questions were going to be answered whether I wanted them to be or not. I could only hope that I could survive what he told me. I sat up and then back in my chair. Until I knew how this was going to go, I didn't trust myself to be touching him .

“But first I need to know what happened. How I got here .”

“Didn't the doctors tell you?” I asked .

He shook his head. “I haven't seen any. I woke up about ten minutes before you did .”

“And you didn't call anyone in here ?”

“I didn't want to wake you .”

I managed a weak smile that I knew didn't reach my eyes. I gave him the short version of what had happened, starting with me being worried when he didn't answer my calls. My voice hitched when I got to the part where I'd realized he wasn't breathing, and he reached for my hand. I let him take it, needing the comfort more than I needed the distance .

“I'm so sorry, Aubree.” He pressed his lips against the back of my hand .

“What happened, Cade?” I couldn't stop myself from asking the question. “Who was...” My voice trailed off .

“The man you found with me is named Samuel Lehane. Sammy .”

The familiarity in the way Cade said the name made my stomach turn to ice. I forced myself to keep my hand in his. I'd trusted him this far. I would hear him out before I acted .

“I told you before about how a woman I'd worked for propositioned me and that was how I got started as an escort,” he said .

I nodded. I remembered. A flare of anger went through me at the thought of the people who had taken advantage of a hurting young man .

“That was true...to an extent.” His fingers tightened around mine. “There was a time between me running away and ending up in that woman's bed .”

I could see the struggle on his face. He didn't want to share this, and it wasn't because he wanted to hide things from me. He was in pain. “It's okay,” I said. “You don't have to tell me .”

“Yes,” he countered. “I do. You deserve to know .”

Maybe that was true, but I wasn't sure I wanted to know .

“I was on the streets for weeks after I ran, trying to find ways to eat, to survive, and I was losing. And then I met Sammy. He was the first friend I had. When he realized that I was working odd jobs for barely enough money to keep me alive, he told me I should do what he did. Turn tricks. I kept telling him no, but he persisted and, finally, when I was hungry enough, I agreed .”

His fingers twitched and suddenly, I was holding his hand and not the other way around .

“He took me to meet his pimp who told me I was perfect, that I'd been made to fuck .”

My lips flattened into a thin line but I didn't speak. I knew how hard it was to re-start a painful story once stopped. I wasn't going to interrupt .

“He told me that he had the perfect client for me to start with and gave me an address. That simple. All I had to do, he said, was do what I was told and I'd get sixty bucks and get to keep half .”

Thirty dollars. I really didn't want to know what he'd had to do for that money .

“When I got to the address, it was a warehouse and the client was a man .”

My eyes widened .

“I tried to leave, told him I wasn't gay, but he grabbed me. Hit me.” Cade's hands were cold. “I'd barely eaten for weeks. I wasn't strong enough to fight back .”

I felt like I was going to be sick. I didn't want to hear what happened next, but if he could tell it, the least I could do was listen .

“He tied me up, took my clothes.” Cade's voice was flat, emotionless, but his eyes told a different story. “He touched me, told me how I was only good for one thing, told me what he was going to do to me. I knew he was going to rape me and leave me for others to do the same. And I hoped that in the end, I would die .”

Oh, my Cade. I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from saying it out loud .

“Before he could...” He paused, and then continued. “Sammy showed up. He hit the guy with a brick. Killed him .”

The man I'd found with Cade had saved his life. I didn't understand .

“I went to the hospital. The man went to the morgue and Sammy went to jail. I tried telling the cops what had happened, but all they could see were two hooking street kids who'd killed a respected schoolteacher. Sammy pled out on a self defense charge and got out last week. He showed up at the loft after you left the other night...” His voice trailed off and I knew he was remembering the fight .

“It's okay.” I put his hand on my cheek. “I'm here .”

He nodded. “The night I was almost...the night Sammy saved me, it was one of the worst nights of my life. And he rescued me from it being something even more horrible. I owed him my life .”

The image from when I'd first seen Cade and Sammy popped into my head. I couldn't help but wonder if Sammy's reasons for saving Cade that night hadn't been just because they were friends or Sammy was a good guy. The way the other man's arm had been draped over Cade had looked an awful lot like a romantic embrace .

“So when he asked me if he could stay with me, I said okay.” Cade rubbed his thumb over my knuckles. “We were fine the last couple days. We talked. I tried to help him find a straight job. I know some people who owe me favors so I told Sammy I could get him work.” He looked at me. “And I told him about you .”

I suddenly remembered the note that I'd found slipped under my door. I had a sneaking suspicion that Sammy had been the author of that note. The one that had told me to stay away from Cade. The pieces fit together. I wasn't about to tell Cade any of that though. Not when he clearly wasn't done with whatever he had to say .

“He was fine at first, listened to me when I talked. I thought he was being a friend.” He sighed and ran his free hand through his hair. “But then, before I went to the club last night, I got your photographs developed. They made me realize how much I needed you. I told Sammy that I was going out so I could clear my head. Then I got back this morning and saw that he'd torn up all of the pictures .”

That at least explained the mess I'd found .

“When I confronted him about it, he told me that he was in love with me .”

I was more surprised about the fact that he seemed surprised. I'd suspected that much after hearing only part of his story and couldn't figure out how he hadn't at least had some idea .

“Sammy said that he'd protected me because he'd loved me back then too, that he thought I had to have known how he felt.” Cade looked at me with wide eyes. “But I didn't know. Not until he said it .”

I nodded and squeezed his hand. I had a feeling we were getting into what had happened in the time before I arrived at the loft .

“I told him that we were friends, that I appreciated what he'd done, but that I was in love with you. And that we'd made up. That I was going to quit hooking because I wanted to be with you. He told me that it was an infatuation, that I'd just fallen for the first trick who didn't treat me like trash. He said it was common, that it happened to everyone like us.” His expression was earnest when he looked at me. “But it's not .”

“I know it's not.” I felt a strong urge to wrap my arms around him, to protect him from things that had already happened to him. “I know you love me.” And I did. Even when I'd initially freaked out seeing Sammy with his arm around Cade, deep down, I'd known that there had to be an explanation. And I was also certain now that Sammy had been the one to threaten me .

Relief passed over Cade's face and then he continued his story. “Sammy started getting worked up, so I told him to sit down, that we should have a drink together. I poured us both a drink and then went to the bathroom. When I came back out, he was calmer and I thought things were better .”

I looked down at my hand. The glass I'd cut my hand on, it had been from a broken glass, something with liquid in it. I had a bad feeling that I knew where this was going .

“We drank together and then Sammy leaned over. He tried to kiss me. I told him 'no,' but it came out garbled. He said it was okay, that it didn't matter anymore. That we'd be together forever soon enough. Things got really hazy after that. I remember sitting down on the bed. Feeling Sammy sitting behind me. Then...nothing until I woke up here and saw you sleeping .”

I stood, considered it for a moment, then climbed onto the bed. The nurses would probably have a fit when they came in shortly, but I didn't care. Cade wrapped his arms around me as I curled against him. I rested my head on his chest as my fingers traced patterns over his flat stomach .

“I am so sorry I put you through that,” he said. He kissed the top of my head .

“Promise me that you'll never scare me like that again.” I squeezed him .

“I promise.” He ran his fingers through my hair. “There is one upside to all of this .”

I looked up at him, confused. What the hell kind of good could come out of all this shit? We hadn't needed this to confess our feelings for each other .

He smiled at me and traced my lips with the tip of his finger. “Since Sammy destroyed all of those pictures, I get to convince you to pose for me again .”

I started to roll my eyes, but his mouth came down on mine and I forgot about everything but kissing him .

Until the nurses came in .