Elizabeth
Every night, when I tried to sleep, the sound of Marie crying haunted my thoughts. My sister cried constantly. She moaned from hurt, from pain, from rejection. Still, the last times she’d shed tears it was from rage, pure rage for feeling crazy and tormented for wanting to be near her mate, for wanting him to touch her, even if it was to hurt her. It was a strange obsession and reaction. How could she want to feel pain? Was Alaric's deranged behavior reflecting on my sister?
Something else changed with time. Marie didn’t let me touch her. Not since Alaric raped me while she watched. It was not my fault; I was the one that was hurt, abused, and humiliated. I tried to make her understand that, but she seemed deaf and insensible to my begging, to my tears, and pain. I also needed comfort and for her to tell me that everything would be okay. Instead, she looked at me like it was my fault.
That monster often came to repeat the insane torture, to make me scream, until I didn't scream anymore, until I wouldn't react any longer, and became emotionless. Each time, my sister would try to free herself from the silver handcuffs, he used to restrain her, and she would beg him not to touch me. Each time, I wished for death and that he would dare to kill me permanently. In turn, Alaric would dare me to kill him, but I knew that Marie would die too. There were days that I would consider killing him and ending my sister's misery in the process because the things that were happening to us were not normal. I wouldn't call our life living. We merely existed. Maybe we were both better off dead. Perhaps if I didn't love her more than my own life, I could do that to her. Besides, she would beg me not to, not to kill that sick bastard that enjoyed killing people, raping women, and tormenting his soul-mate. She believed that they belonged, and he would eventually change his behavior and love her. That was a deranged thought. I knew Marie was nothing like him, she hadn't a bone of evilness in her before meeting him. So, how could she be his?
Alaric didn't feel the same as she did, because he would starve us to near death and then he would make us feed from the source. He was cruel beyond my worst nightmares. He would bring humans, mostly scared young girls, to be sucked and drained by us. We couldn't control our urges. We tried, but we would normally end up killing them. And the guilt was terrible. Their memories, their fear of dying, their fear of us monsters would haunt me and torment my days and nights.
We were taught not to feed from the source so we would live longer and healthier, to not end up mad. Madness was the main cause of vampires' deaths. We could live forever or at least for a long time, but it was not a coincidence that millenary vampires didn’t exist. They would eventually kill themselves from madness or boredom. Eternity was not everybody's cup of tea.
I never hated being a vampire until then.
I woke up startled, remembering the last time I killed a human because I was starving. There was only one word in the whole world that began to work better to calm me down than a prayer: “Eric! Eric!”
“I'm here, honey,” he said leaning near me. He was seated on the armchair next to my bed. It had become so typical to see him there that it was strange when he wasn't.
“How long did I sleep this time?”
“Twelve hours.”
I grinned painfully. I was a pureblood. I should not be taking so long to heal. It had been one week since he took me to that room to heal. But my soul was damaged, and it affected my ability to heal physically. I had to want to improve, but depression was winning.
“You look better today,” he praised.
I looked at the almost empty bag of blood, which was being poured inside my veins. I had used a lot of blood, more than I should need. My attention was drawn to the happy laughing sounds that came from outside. I looked out the window. It was a sunny, warm day, a happy day with people enjoying themselves.
“My family is outside at the pool with some friends,” Eric said, following my wandering eyes. “We can join them if you feel strong enough to go outside. It would make you feel better.”
I stared at him. I made him miserable. He could be outside having fun and being happy instead of being inside a bedroom with a worthless dying mate. “You should go. You don't need to be here all the time.”
“My place is beside you. We’ve already been apart for far too long.”
“I do not want … to make you miserable.”
“Then. come with me outside.”
I nibbled on my lower, probably pale-dry lip. He had a way of reasoning that made me want to make him happy, but also of making me feel guilty.
“I don't feel strong enough,” I said, after pondering for a long while. It was a good reason. I didn't feel like walking. I didn't even know if I could walk, and I was too tired to try.
“I brought you a wheelchair,” he informed, pointing at it folded near the wall. “I would gladly take you in my arms, but I know you don't like me to touch you … much.”
He looked away as if ashamed of saying that. I knew it was painful for him not to be able to touch me. He was patient and respectful. I had to admire his control. Even if I was reluctant about the physical contact, I had to confess I didn't feel disgusted by it. It felt good, but I needed to take baby steps.
I always took too long to reply to his questions or to talk to him. He was patient and waited for me to take my time. Eric never insisted I talk if I wasn’t in the mood.
“I don't know if I want to see other people.”
“We can give it a try. You don't need to talk to anyone if you don't want to. I'll bring you back here the moment you want to leave.”
Eric had a hopeful face, and he was actually smiling while talking. My mate had a beautiful grin. Alaric didn't smile. Not nicely. He smirked wickedly and chuckled with evilness.
“Come on, Beth,” Eric asked tenderly, calling me by my nickname. The one my sister always used.
I sighed. It sounded romantic on his lips. It sounded like poetry.
“Is Anna downstairs?” I asked, considering the possibilities. I had to meet his family. Why not now?
“Yes, she’s there. My parents are arriving and some of our wolf friends are here too.”
“It sounds terrifying,” I confessed.
“I'll be next to you. It will be okay.”
“Fine.” I surrendered, pulling the needle from my arm, which was pumping blood in me, and sitting on the bed.
Eric lit up. He went for the chair and gave me his hands to help me out of bed and sit on the chair.
I looked at my sleeping gown. I was not dressed for an afternoon near the pool. “I look terrible!”
“No, you don't.” He was being indulgent again. “But you can't go outside in a nightgown. I’ll call a maid to help you clean up and get dressed. Anna brought you new clothes, and my mom also has tons of stuff she can loan you. She loves to shop! You'll need to do some shopping too. Once you feel better.”
Tears prickled my eyes. “You’re so lucky.”
“Why, honey?”
“You have a mom and dad. Mine were killed a century ago.”
“You have new parents now. A new family,” he said.
His words warmed my heart. I hadn't thought about that. I was punishing myself so much that I had forgotten that finding my mate meant that I would have a whole new family, too. The happiness was short lived when I thought that Marie was my family and that she was no longer with me to share the new family I had. The same family that could be hers if her mate wasn't unwelcome and wasn't a psycho.
“Who is Anna's dad if you are her uncle?” I asked.
“Anna is the daughter of one of my older brothers.”
“Where is he?”
“He’s dead. But we have to get you ready to go downstairs and not to talk about sad things. I still want to show you the garden. You’ll see how beautiful it is.” He changed the subject as he pushed my chair out of the bedroom.
“Did you call?” Anna asked, appearing in the corridor with a huge smile.
His niece was beautiful. She had the same friendly and warm smile as Eric. And even if Anna's hair was dark as coal, she had eyes that looked like Eric's. I liked her, she had been incredibly kind to me.
“I was going to call you,” Eric said. “Beth needs a bath and to put on new clothes to join us downstairs. Could you help her with that?”
“Sure. It will be my pleasure to take care of her if you can let her go for a few minutes,” she said with a grin that made Eric furrow his brows. “She’ll be safe with me. I promise.”
Eric nodded and placed his hand on my shoulder. “I'll wait for Beth in your bedroom, Anna.”
“Outside uncle, a girl needs her privacy,” Anna said, pulling my chair inside another room and closing the door on Eric's nose.
It was priceless. Too bad I knew precisely what he was feeling. I didn't want to be away from him, but I didn’t want him to see me naked either.