LAUREN

 

 

Tyler looked as though he had barely slept. Like me, he was still dressed in the clothes from the night before. Dark marks bruised the skin beneath his eyes, his hair was dishevelled and messy, but he still looked like heaven.

The relief that crossed his face when his eyes lighted on me was visible. He pulled himself straight. “Come home,” he said. His voice had a roughness to it, but whether it was from lack of sleep or worry, I wasn’t sure.

I twisted my hands together, aware that they were trembling. He said come home. Those words ripped through my chest, leaving it open and vulnerable and tears threatening. I wanted to run to him. I wanted to wrap my arms around his neck and bury my face in his chest, inhaling his scent, kissing his skin.

I wanted to, but I didn’t.

“Tyler,” I said and nodded at him.

“Lauren.” It was more of a question than a greeting. His gaze held steadily onto mine. Stepping past Shrek, he walked until we stood face to face, eyes pleading with me. “I’m sorry.” He didn’t say any more, just those two words, but they were enough. His steel-grey eyes searched mine, begging for the forgiveness his words didn’t. “Will you come home with me?”

Shrek stood with the jar of baby food in his hand, eyes darting between us as he dipped the spoon in and lifted it to his mouth. Henry cried out from his high chair. “Shh,” Shrek scolded. “Daddy’s watching a real life soap opera.”

Tyler threw a withering glance his way and held out his hand. Sparks flew when our skin touched, but neither of us said a word. I gathered my things, thanking Shrek over and over again, even as he told me I was more than welcome to stay, and followed Tyler back to the car. Tyler held the door open and waited until I was safely inside before shaking Shrek’s hand and thanking him for giving me somewhere to stay.

“She’s welcome anytime,” Shrek replied. “She knows that. She will always have a place to come if she needs it.” There was a threat behind Shrek’s words that didn’t go unnoticed by Tyler. He nodded and shook Shrek’s hand again before climbing into the driver’s seat.

The first hour of the trip was spent in silence. There were so many things to say, but I didn’t know where to start. Tyler’s expression was cold. His teeth were clenched together and his fingers were wrapped tightly around the steering wheel. When he turned the music on and let it fill the space, I knew he wasn’t ready to talk. I wasn’t either. I didn’t know what to say and even if I had, I didn’t know how to say it. I hated that I had hurt him. I hated that he spoke to me the way he did. I hated what he said. I hated that he couldn’t be in the same room as Gabe without something breaking out between them. Between us.

But more than anything, I hated that there was this tension between us. I hated that he hadn’t kissed me. He’d barely touched me. My skin was burning for him. I needed reassurance that he wasn’t giving.

Six hours seemed like an eternity. I don’t know when it flipped over to be an unspoken competition, but I felt like neither of us wanted to be the one to break the silence.

* * *

The groan of the elevator was loud as we rose to the loft and the metal door clanged as Tyler slid it across the rollers. Smudge was there to greet us, an odd occurrence since moving to the city as he spent most of his time catching mice on the lower levels, or lounging in the sun. He smooched against Tyler’s legs, more happy to see him than me. Traitor.

We stood in the middle of the room, staring at each other, both hoping the other would be the one to relent and speak first. But words weren’t the form of communication Tyler chose. He walked over to stand in front of me and dropped his gaze, reaching out to take the tips of my fingers in his. His fingers toyed with mine, threading them together almost apologetically. His eyes were slow to meet mine and when they did, instead of an apology, they held desire. My heart fluttered in my chest as he lifted the tender underside of my wrist to his mouth and pressed a kiss there. My skin burned under his touch as he trailed kisses up my arm, looking up at me for permission each time he touched my skin, moving further and further up my arm until there was only a breath between our mouths. His lips were soft at first, pushing against mine hesitantly, searching for permission and forgiveness, at the same time as letting me feel the pain and hurt in his touch.

“Tyler,” I breathed into his mouth.

At the sound of his name on my lips, he let out a groan that spoke of his turmoil and he crushed his mouth to mine, his hands clasping the side of my face, drawing me further into him until they wound through my hair and tugged at the angle of my mouth on his. Then he lifted me to his waist, my legs locking around him, and walked into the bedroom. He set me down and turned so he could release the back of my dress, letting it fall in an emerald puddle at my feet. Unclasping the hooks of my bra, his fingers brushed over my shoulder as he removed the straps, then tossed it to the floor. Next, he knelt and peeled my underwear over my hips, running his hands over the length of my legs as he guided them to the floor and I stepped out. My shoes were next. Still kneeling, Tyler lifted my feet and removed one then the other.

He was gentle when he led me to the bed and lay me down. Standing for a moment, he just stared before undressing slowly, his eyes never leaving mine as first his shoes, then his shirt and jeans were removed, and finally his boxers. As he stood before me, my heart beat erratically and my eyes traced the lines of his body hungrily. Lust pulsed through my veins.

Climbing over me, Tyler pressed the length of his body along mine as if he couldn’t stand for any part of us not to be touching. With lips pressed to my shoulder, he guided himself and slid into me, my breath hitching as his hardness filled me. He pushed his body upwards, causing the base of him to rub over my clit and then he just rocked back and forth so slowly it was torture. With my hands gripping the flesh of his back, my head rolled back and my chest arched upwards, pressing further into him, needing to be as close as possible.

Grabbing my chin between his finger and thumb, he roughly jerked my head down, forcing me to look into his eyes as he continued his slow torture. I whimpered, needing to move, to writhe under him, but he let his weight press my body into the mattress and held my head in place with the grip of his fingers, demanding that I look at him, demanding that my body stay still under his.

He rocked back and forth, watching as the pleasure trembled over my body until it erupted and I came, panting and crying out his name. Only then did he release me. He let go of the grip on my chin, lifted the weight of his body and withdrew to sit on the edge of the bed, his hard cock protruding proudly between his legs, hands left trailing over my stomach.

“Tyler?” I said, sitting up and moving beside him. I reached between his legs and wrapped my hands around his hardness but he took my wrist and pulled my hand away.

“You should have told me,” he said finally.

“I know.” I dropped my gaze to the floor as Tyler lay back. “You shouldn’t have said what you did.”

“I know,” he replied. “I’m sorry.”

“How are we going to move past this? Gabe is always going to be part of your life, more so now with his involvement in the company, and there will always be that knowledge of me being with him.”

Tyler didn’t reply. The muscles of his jaw worked back and forth as he stared at the ceiling.

“Tell me about your past. Surely you’ve got some baggage that you could share, even the load a little. It’s not fair that I’ve got an ex-fiancé and, well, and Gabe.”

Tyler shook his head. “There isn’t anyone really.”

“So you had no one before me? I find that hard to believe.” I lay back on the bed, mimicking Tyler’s position, and stared at the ceiling lined with dark rafters.

“I suppose there was this one girl.”

“Just the one?”

Tyler turned to his side, propping his head on his hand with his elbow digging into the mattress. “I didn’t really have anyone before you. There were women, women like Molly and Amanda, but they were dates to functions. They had no place in the rest of my life.”

“So tell me about this one girl.”

Tyler reached over and traced circles around my belly button with his finger. “It was nothing really. I was sixteen and Jake and I were spending the summer holidays with our mother. She lived in this little town. I didn’t want to go. But I discovered that living with Mum was a lot different than living with Dad. We had freedom. We roamed the streets and attended all the small town parties we could. I got drunk for the first time, and I got stoned for the first time, all under the supervision of good old Gloria. Anyway, I met this girl at one of the parties. She was a few years older than me, and I thought she was gorgeous. She was my first. I was young and naïve and thought I was in love. She was everything exciting and forbidden. Or so I thought.”

“What happened?”

“What do you mean, what happened?”

“How did it end?” I prompted.

Tyler flopped onto his back again. “A few days before I was due to come back home, she changed. I walked over to her house and she refused to let me in. She just stood there, shouting through the closed door for me to go away. I did. And then I went back later on but she still refused to see me. I didn’t know what I had done wrong. And, of course, me being the naïve kid that I was, it never occurred to me that there was more going on in her life than just me. Anyway, after refusing to move from her door on the day I was supposed to leave, she finally let me in and told me what was going on. She was pregnant. It wasn’t mine, but I didn’t know that when the words first came out of her mouth and I literally froze. I was only sixteen. I was in no way ready to be a father. But then I couldn’t stand the thought of not being with her. I was prepared to give up everything to be with her, even if it meant raising some other guy’s kid.” He spoke with a twinkle in his eye, rolling his bottom lip over his teeth almost as if he was daring me to jealousy.

“So what happened to her? Did she go back to the father of the baby?”

Tyler shook his head against the duvet. “Didn’t see her again after that. Mum called Dad to come and pick me up because she was worried I was getting too attached. I snuck out late one night and caught a bus all the way back there but when I arrived, Mum was in a state and the things she said about me, about Claudia…” He sighed heavily. “I’ve barely seen Mum since.”

I moved across the bed and lay my head on his chest. “That’s a rather sad story.”

He shrugged and my head shifted on his chest. “It is what it is.”

“When was the last time you saw your Mum?”

Tyler tensed under me. “Clark’s funeral.”

“And there’ve been no other girls since?” I asked, sensing the need to change the subject away from his mother.

A smile creased Tyler’s face. “Of course there have been women, just none that I’ve felt a connection to. Not that there weren’t plenty who tried.”

“Oh really?” I teased.

“Really.” He laughed and it rumbled around his chest. “At one stage I was thinking of hiring security just to keep them away.”

I rolled my eyes and shoved him playfully. “So with all these women chasing you, what made you want me?” I shifted the tilt of my chin so I could look up at him.

“That’s easy,” he said and pressed a kiss to my head. “You’re smart, you’re talented, and you make me laugh as well as drive me insane. And, you’re incredibly beautiful. No matter how much I get to know you, I always want to know more.”

Tyler silenced any further questions with his mouth, his hands gripping each side of my face. He kissed me until I forgot what we had been talking about, until I forgot the argument we had had, until I forgot we had spent the night apart. He kissed me until everything else melted away and there was nothing but him and me. Nothing else existed.

Suddenly he pulled away and grinned. “Another reason I like you.” He pulled his lip between his teeth, trying to smother a smirk.

“Yes?” I prompted.

“You fuck incredibly well.”

He kissed me again and I mumbled against his mouth, “Do I now?”

“Yes,” he said and his hands slid between us until they found the wetness between my legs. “I like the way you fuck very, very much.”