Chapter 7
Gabby was trying her best to hold on to her temper. “And what if things didn’t go well? Huh? You could have died and we never would have known.”
“Yes, you would have. And you would have been taken care of. I’d made sure of that. Even before I went to Chicago, I updated my will to make you and Taylor my sole beneficiaries. The life insurance would have—”
She stood abruptly. “Do you think I care about that? That somehow money would have made it better if we had lost you?” Tears were streaming down her face again and there was nothing she could do to stop them.
“I didn’t mean—”
“Of course you didn’t. You didn’t mean anything.”
Jax eased himself into a standing position, almost as if he were afraid if he moved too fast he would spook her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. That was the opposite of what I wanted. But I thought a little hurt now would save you from a bigger hurt later. I see now that I was wrong.” Stepping forward, he placed his hands on her forearms and waited until she looked at him. “If I could go back and do it over, I would do things differently, but I can’t. All I can do is say I’m sorry and try to make it up to you if I can.”
“How?” She sniffed, hating that she was such an emotional mess. “How are you going to make it up to us?”
“I want to be a good dad to Taylor. To be there for her when she needs me. To see her grow up, and even to help chase the boys away when she’s old enough to start dating.”
Gabby couldn’t help but chuckle at that.
He slid his hands up her arms and cupped her face between his palms. “I promise I won’t take off again.”
“I don’t know if I can trust you.” She whispered the words because that was all she could manage at the moment. The pull she always felt toward him was there, even though seconds ago she was ready to throttle him.
A small step forward closed the gap between them until their chests were touching. “Give me time. I’ll prove it to you.”
She closed her eyes, trying to steady herself—an almost impossible task when he was standing so close to her. “I don’t know . . .”
“Please, Gabby. Give me one more chance. I promise you won’t regret it.”
His mouth was a breath away from hers. It would be so easy to give in—to let her hormones take control again. But she’d done that before. Twice. And it had gotten them nowhere.
Before she could talk herself out of it, Gabby pulled away.
He didn’t reach for her again, letting his arms fall to his sides.
She took a deep breath, trying to clear her head. Every time he was near her entire body went into hyperdrive. “I need some time to think.”
Jax looked disappointed but nodded anyway. “I understand.”
They stood there for several minutes, the air between them becoming charged again. She knew they needed to get out of her bedroom. “Have you checked the weather this morning?”
“Not much change from last night. They’re asking people to stay off the streets so the plows can salt the roads.”
Gabby moved to her dresser. “I’m going to shower and then see if I can get some writing done.”
“I’ll try to stay out of your way.” With that, he turned and walked out of the room, leaving her alone.
Grabbing a clean pair of underwear, bra, and a change of clothes, Gabby headed for the bathroom. Once the door was closed behind her, she felt as if she could breathe again. Or at least, better. Knowing they were both stuck there for the time being wasn’t helping. She didn’t like feeling trapped in general, but with all the emotions flooding through her she felt as if she’d been thrown into the deep end of a pool without knowing how to swim to the other side.
Warm steam filled the room as she removed her pajamas and threw them into the hamper that was almost overflowing. She’d need to do laundry today. It would give her something to do to take her mind off Jax. As much as she wanted to write, she wasn’t sure she would be able to focus. She’d written the big fight scene the night before and all that was left was the final reunion of the two main characters. Given the intensity of the story’s climax, and its tone, it needed to be both sweet and sexy and Gabby wasn’t feeling either of those at the moment.
Okay, she was feeling somewhat sexy. It was impossible not to when Jax looked at her the way he did—like he wanted to rip her clothes off right then and there.
Gabby groaned when she realized the direction her thoughts were taking. It was always like this. All she had to do was think about him and she began remembering all the things he could do to her body.
Grabbing her shower gel, Gabby added a large dollop to her loofah. She kneaded the gel into the fibers with a little water until it was covered in suds and ran it over her skin. Even though her loofah felt nothing like Jax’s hands, the sensation lit up the nerve endings in her arms, stomach, and breasts. She was a hot ball of arousal by the time she rinsed herself off.
There was only a moment’s hesitation before she reached for the removable showerhead. She’d invested in one not long after Jax left. With a baby in the house, the shower was one of the few times she had to herself and she’d made the most of it.
She turned the dial on the showerhead from the gentle spray she used to wash to something with a little more pressure behind it. Then she rested her back against the side of the shower and spread her legs. The moment the water hit her already sensitive clit, she had to bite her lip to keep from moaning.
Closing her eyes, she let her mind go where it wanted. She could feel his hands ghosting over her body, coaxing her closer and closer to orgasm.
Her body heated at memories of him between her legs, running his tongue over her sex, circling her clit. It had been so long since she’d felt his mouth on her like that.
Gabby gasped as her grip on the showerhead slipped a little and the water hit a new spot. She blindly searched for something to hold on to as she climbed higher toward her goal. Oh.
Every muscle in her body clenched and she yelled out as she reached her climax. All of the want and need she’d been feeling finally found release. She lowered the showerhead and sagged against the wall as her breathing slowly returned to normal.
Once her head began to clear, Gabby knew she was in trouble. As much as she feared being hurt again, she wasn’t sure if she could resist Jax. Not for long anyway. Every cell in her being responded to him.
She finished washing up and took her time getting dressed. Giving in would be so easy. But was that what was best for her and Taylor? He said he wouldn’t leave again, but could she trust that? Would she ever be able to trust him?
The problem was she didn’t know the answer to any of those questions. She wanted him, yes. That didn’t mean, however, that opening her heart to him was a good idea.
But what was the alternative? Continue how they’d been? He was right about the way they’d been tiptoeing around each other. At the moment Taylor was too young to pick up on it, but sooner or later she’d be able to figure out something wasn’t right between her parents. What then?
She ran a brush through her hair as she blew it dry with the hair dryer. It was a mindless task, which was good. She needed all her mental energy to figure out what she was going to do about Jax.
The more she thought about it, the more she realized there was only one thing she could do. She was going to have to give him the chance he’d asked for. It scared her more than anything had in her life except giving birth to her daughter. That had turned out to be one of the best things to ever happen to her. She could only hope this thing with Jax turned out the same.
Her hair mostly dry, she put everything away and opened the door. She halted when she saw Jax a few feet away, leaning against the opposite wall.
Gabby opened her mouth to ask him what he was doing standing there when she got a look at his eyes. His stance might have been casual, but his eyes told a different story. She lowered her gaze to his crotch and sure enough she could see the bulge of his erection.
Before she could find her words, he spoke, his voice husky and full of lust. “I heard you scream and thought you needed help.”
Her eyes went wide and her heart rate skyrocketed. She knew she was in trouble. Big, big trouble.
***
Jax watched the range of emotions fly across Gabby’s face. She sucked in a lungful of air, causing her breasts to rise and fall. The sweater she was wearing did little to lessen the impact to his libido. He knew what was underneath the thick fabric.
Her lips parted and her tongue darted out to run along her bottom lip before disappearing back inside her mouth. He swallowed, trying to hold on to his resolve to give her the space she’d asked for. It wasn’t easy, but he held his ground.
That was until she launched herself at him. She took hold of his face, pulling it down until her lips covered his. It took him a moment to catch up to the change, but when he did he held nothing back. He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her against him as he devoured her mouth.
Gabby pressed against him, pushing his weight into the wall. There was an almost frantic feeling to her kiss . . . a desperation. As much as he loved her enthusiasm, he didn’t want her to end up regretting it like she had last night.
He ripped his mouth free for a second. “Gabby.”
She kissed him again, dipping her tongue into his mouth. It would be so easy to forget his worries and go with it, but he didn’t just want to lose himself in her body. She was more important to him than a moment of pleasure.
“I don’t,” he said between kisses. “Want. You. To. Regret.”
Gabby stopped and met his gaze. He could see the hunger in her eyes, the want. But that had never been the problem. For either of them. He’d wanted her from the first moment he saw her and it had been the same for her. He doubted that would ever change. “I won’t regret it.”
“You said that last time and—”
She placed two fingers over his lips. “I promise I won’t go hide in the bathroom after.” Her gaze went to his lips. “I promise we’ll talk. Later.” She looked up at him again. “Right now I need you. There is only so much a showerhead can do.”
His cock pulsed at the image she’d presented, the sound of her scream still fresh in his mind. He cupped her ass with the palm of his left hand and her breast with the other.
Gabby arched her back, thrusting her breast farther into his hand.
He couldn’t resist such a temptation. Lowering his mouth, he moaned as their lips connected once more. She stood on her tiptoes and lifted her leg to wrap around his hip, seeking the friction she desired.
They kissed until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He needed to touch her bare skin, to feel her warmth without her clothes blocking his access.
“What do you want?” he asked.
Never one to shy away from expressing her feelings, Gabby answered him. “I want you to use your mouth to make me come.” Then she said something that was sure to make what little room he had in his jeans disappear. “That’s what I was thinking about in the shower. You between my legs. The way your tongue—”
She yelped as he kissed her hard, cutting her off, and then picked her up and carried her into her bedroom. He laid her down on the bed and immediately reached for the button on her pants.
Gabby giggled as he lowered her zipper and worked the jeans down her legs. He dropped them on the floor and went to work on ridding her of the panties. It was then she seemed to decide to help speed up the process. She reached for the hem of her sweater and shimmied it up her torso and over her head.
Spreading her legs, Jax settled himself between them and let her scent fill his lungs. He met her gaze and held it as he ran his tongue along her pussy. “You’re so beautiful like this. All spread out for me.” He took another long lick, savoring her flavor.
As he continued to feast on her, she closed her eyes and tilted her head back. Gabby arched her back and placed her hand on top of his head, encouraging him. She didn’t have to worry. He had no desire to stop.
The last time he’d been in that position was shortly before she’d given birth to Taylor. Her contractions had started, but they weren’t close enough together to warrant going to the hospital yet. He remembered feeling helpless and needing to do something to help her. It had started out with him massaging her back and belly. Then she’d mentioned reading something about sex helping move labor along. He’d been hesitant, but as time passed and her contractions continued, he thought of a compromise that ended up being exactly what they’d both needed.
“Please.” She dug her fingernails into his scalp, urging him on.
“Are you getting close, baby?”
“Uh-huh.” Jax thought he saw her nod, but he couldn’t be sure. He was too focused on what he was doing.
A few more circles around her clit and she was teetering on the edge. Her breathing was labored and he could feel a slight tremor in her legs.
“That’s it. Let go. Come for me, Gabby. I want to hear you. Don’t hold back.” He flattened his tongue over her clit, took a long lick, and then sucked it into his mouth.
She inhaled a lungful of air and pushed his head toward her body, begging him not to let up on his assault.
Jax couldn’t help but smile. He thrust two fingers inside her, putting pressure right where she liked it. The low moan coming from her throat let him know he’d hit the correct spot.
“Jax?”
He sucked harder. Added a little more pressure.
“Jax!”
The walls of her pussy pulsed around his fingers as they coated him with moisture. He eased up on her clit, softly bringing her down from her high.
Jax removed his fingers and placed them into his mouth. She tasted amazing and she looked amazing lying there, her skin flushed a lovely pink color as she worked to slow her breathing.
Her gaze followed his movements, watching him lick the evidence of her orgasm. “Watching you do that is such a turn-on.”
He chuckled and eased himself on top of her, bringing his face level with hers. “You like that, do you?”
She circled her arms around his neck, pulling his mouth down for a kiss. “Yes.”
Since meeting Gabby, he’d learned that she didn’t hold back once she decided to go after something. It didn’t matter if it was in life or in the bedroom. She probed his mouth, exploring and tasting herself on his tongue. He deepened the kiss, encouraging her to continue her search.
“You’re wearing too many clothes,” she murmured against his lips. Snaking her hands between them, she began pulling at the hem of his sweater.
Jax sat up and removed the offending piece of material. “So are you.”
“I’m naked except for my bra.”
“Exactly.”
Gabby rolled her eyes but turned to one side so he could unhook her bra. She tossed it aside, leaving her without a stitch of clothing. “Satisfied?”
A wicked look crossed his face. “Not yet.”
It took some maneuvering, but he kicked his shoes, socks, and pants off before returning to hover over her. “Please tell me you have condoms somewhere. I used the only one I had last night.”
She turned her head to look at her nightstand and lifted her chin. “Top drawer.”
When he opened the drawer, he found a small box of condoms. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw they’d never been opened.
Gabby helped him push his boxers down his legs and out of the way. Before he was able to get the condom out of the wrapper, she took hold of his cock and began moving her hand from base to tip. He grabbed the back of her neck and kissed her hard, pumping his hips into her hand.
The head of his erection bumped her opening and Jax knew he needed to get the condom on before they both ended up losing their heads. As much as he would love to have another child someday, he doubted Gabby was ready for that. He wasn’t even sure they were a couple at this point and he didn’t want to add to their issues. They had enough obstacles to overcome as it was.
He nudged her hand away and rolled the condom over his erection. Once it was in place, he wasted no time. He lined himself up with her entrance and let his cock sink into her warmth.
“Kiss me,” Gabby demanded as his cock was swallowed up by her pussy.
Thrusting his hips forward, he lowered himself down, covering her body with his as he brought their lips together. They moved, connected like that. It was so much more than finding pleasure in each other. There had always been so much more with Gabby.
His feelings for her overwhelmed him until he couldn’t contain them anymore. “I love you. I always have. I never stopped.”
She cupped the side of his face, staring into his eyes. “I love you, too. I never stopped.”
There was a charge in the air around them that went beyond the physical and neither one seemed to be able to look away. They continued to move the lower halves of their bodies, their rhythm increasing as the sensations built within them.
When he could tell she was getting close, he lowered his right hand and placed it on her hip. He found her clit with his thumb and began to massage it in time with their thrusts.
A few minutes later she was falling apart in his arms, and he followed her soon after.