Alicia watched Justin checking his texts, trying Sophie’s mobile for the thousandth time that morning, pressing his fingers hard to his temples when he got no reply. Dragging in a long breath, he went back to staring out of the lounge window, undoubtedly seeing nothing but the same petrifying images she was.

Where was she? Why weren’t the police doing anything? Why had they classed her as a low-risk case when, if she was out there on the streets, she was clearly at risk. It was her fault. All of it. She was the reason Sophie had left, the reason her husband couldn’t look at her. Could hardly bring himself to speak to her. How could she ever have risked her child’s future, her life, been naive enough to imagine that if she closed her eyes to it, it would all go away? She’d made bad decision after decision. She’d been so stupid and weak.

Justin would have no life without his children.

She glanced towards him from where she sat uselessly on the edge of the sofa. He hadn’t slept, not a wink. Neither of them had even considered going to bed, watching the clock instead, endlessly pacing and hoping and praying. Jumping, physically, whenever a phone rang. When a floorboard had creaked overhead in the night, it was as a ghost had trodden lightly over their graves.

‘Justin…’ Tentatively, Alicia got to her feet and walked towards him. ‘I’m sorry,’ she murmured – a short, useless word that couldn’t possibly convey the deep remorse that she felt.

Justin tensed, his broad shoulders stiffening. ‘Don’t, Alicia,’ he said, after a second, his voice hoarse. ‘Please don’t. I can’t deal with this right now. I just can’t.’

‘Please, talk to me,’ she begged him. Tell me to go if you want me to. She couldn’t bear the thought that she might be torturing him even further by being anywhere near him.

‘About what?’ Justin shrugged, his back still to her. ‘What is there to say, Alicia? Luke’s gone. Sophie’s missing. Out there somewhere because of some fucking…’ He stopped, breathing hard.

‘Because of me. I know.’ Alicia sobbed. ‘I’d undo it if I could. I didn’t mean for—’

‘But you can’t!’ Justin turned towards her, his eyes smouldering with raw anger. ‘You can’t undo any of it! There’s nothing to talk about, don’t you get it? We have no past that I can contemplate even thinking about, let alone talking about. No future. There is nothing you can say that will make any of this—’

The ringing of his mobile cutting him short, Justin immediately answered it.

Alicia felt as if her heart might turn inside out as she watched him, praying it was news of Sophie.

Justin glanced at her. His disappointed expression told her it wasn’t. ‘Yes, thanks for calling back,’ he said into his phone. ‘I need to take some extended leave for personal reasons. Do you think you could organise someone to cover as clinical lead?… I’m not sure. Dr Paton, possibly?’

He waited, squeezing the bridge of his nose hard between his thumb and forefinger. ‘Okay, thanks. Tell her to call me if she gets stuck on anything.’ His frustration tangible as he ended the call, he glanced up at the ceiling.

‘Justin, please believe that I never meant to hurt you,’ Alicia tried cautiously, knowing how ludicrous it sounded even as she said it. Still, she had to try.

‘Right.’ Emitting a guttural laugh, Justin dropped his gaze. ‘I need to go,’ he said gruffly, turning suddenly to the hall.

‘But where?’ Panic gripping her afresh, Alicia followed him.

‘To look for her,’ Justin said, grabbing his jacket from the banister and heading for the front door. ‘I can’t just stand around here doing nothing, for Christ’s sake.’

‘Wait,’ Alicia said, as he yanked open the front door. ‘I’ll come with you. Let me get my mobile and—’

‘No,’ Justin said adamantly. ‘Not because…’ He stopped, sighing heavily as he turned to her. ‘It would probably be better if we split up,’ he suggested, his eyes flicking briefly to hers. ‘I’m going to be walking the streets, in the town centre, anywhere I can think of. You might do better to concentrate on local areas, places she might be known – café’s, clubs she might have been to. And you could speak to her schoolfriends.’

Alicia glanced uncertainly away.

‘It would look less suspect than a man hanging around the school. The police may have covered it, but…’ Again, he stopped, making proper eye contact with her at last, albeit guardedly.

But they might not have. Alicia understood. And Sophie’s schoolfriends might be more likely to talk to her mother than the police, particularly if they frequented the same clubs she and Justin both guessed Sophie snuck into. It made sense. She was sure he wouldn’t want to be in her company, but he wasn’t making a point. His thoughts were on Sophie’s welfare. As she had known they would be.

Swallowing hard, Alicia nodded. ‘Be careful,’ she said, holding his gaze, wishing he could see inside her heart to understand how truly sorry she was.