Three
The next week, I saw Lacey a lot. But it wasn’t enough. The more she was around, the more I wanted her around. Somehow she’d impressed Jen and Sal with her presentation, and had commenced work on her profile. She’d taken action shots of Jen assembling sandwiches, interviewed them both, and had also done an interview with Daisy, since Violet Hill was what helped her reconnect with Molly. It was all very sappy and cute. I teased Daisy about it mercilessly, but she just had a dreamy look in her eyes ninety percent of the time, so I was pretty sure my teasing went in one ear and out the other.
“You’re so in love with her, it’s gross,” I said to Daisy as she squealed and launched herself at Molly when she came to pick her up from work. It was like they hadn’t seen each other for years instead of just a few hours. I didn’t know what that was like. And then Lacey walked in and my heart jumped and started beating super-fast.
“Hey,” I said walking over to her. “Dirty chai?” I’d gotten to know what she liked and didn’t like. It made me feel like a creeper, but also exciting that I knew things about her.
“Yeah, sure. And maybe a BLTA?” she asked. It was basically a BLT with avocado instead of mayo. We also had a version with veggie bacon for all the vegetarians/vegans that we served. What was it with queers and being vegetarians/vegans? It was such a cliché, but it was so true.
“You got it,” I said, stumbling a little bit on my way to put in her order.
“You totally love her,” Daisy said in sing-song as I passed the half-wall that separated the bakery from the rest of the kitchen.
“Huh?” I said, looking back at Lacey, who was busy with her phone.
“You’ve got the biggest fucking heart-eyes right now,” Daisy said as she took off her apron. Molly nodded in agreement.
“I do not,” I said, and actually rubbed my eyes.
“Do too,” Molly said with a little giggle. I rolled my eyes.
“Whatever,” I said under my breath and turned toward the kitchen. I could still feel them watching me.
“Stop it,” I said before I went back to taking care of my tables.
“Never,” Daisy called after me as she headed out the door.
****
“So,” Lacey said on her way out. “I’d love to do an interview with you, if you have the time? I’m only here for another week, and then I’m off to my next project.” My heart actually sank down to my feet. I mean, I should have known that she was going to be on her merry way, but to hear the words from her lips made them real. This sucked. I had just met her, but imagining her leaving felt like a horrible wound opening in my chest. What was wrong with me?
She was still waiting for an answer from me. Oops.
“Oh, yeah, sure. When did you want to do it?” I cringed at how that sounded. I couldn't keep my mind off dirty things when she was around.
“Whenever you have time. I’m pretty much open.” Yeah, I definitely needed to get my mind out of the gutter, but I wasn’t sure if that was ever going to happen. At least not around Lacey. She made my mind go to dirty places with just her presence.
“Oh, yeah. I have some work to do tonight, but maybe I could bring my laptop and I could multitask?” It would help me be more professional if I could get myself into work mode when I was with her. That would be much better.
“Sounds good. I have some editing to do in the studio, so that would be great. How about around eight?” I nodded and she gave me another one of her smiles. I still hadn’t gotten used to my reaction when she smiled. Like the sun was coming out from behind the clouds and I was completely drunk at the same time. It was a strange feeling.
“Great!” I said, squeaking a little. I couldn’t seem to keep my cool around her. It was a real problem. Maybe it was good she was leaving in a week. Then I could get my feet back under me.
*^*^*
I showed up at the studio with my laptop and my professional face on. And then Lacey opened the door with Murder (the cat) in her arms and everything fell away.
“Hey,” I said, feeling the awful urge to giggle.
“Hey, come on in. I was just getting a few cuddles with this monster,” she said, setting the cat down. He immediately wound his way round my legs and purred so hard I thought he was going to hurt himself.
“Little monster,” Lacey said fondly.
“How does he do with all the traveling?” I asked as we headed over to the little office area to sit down. She already had some photos up on the huge desktop and was in the middle of editing.
“He loves it. I swear, he’s like a dog. He sits in the front seat and just purrs away. As long as I don’t take him on a plane, he’s fine. So my car has a lot of miles on it.” Huh, I hadn’t thought of that. A mobile lifestyle. Still couldn’t imagine it.
“That’s good,” I said, sitting down and pulling my laptop out of my bag. “What are you working on?”
She clicked a few things and brought up a seriously sexy picture of a woman wearing black lacy lingerie and laying on a bed, with light streaming through the window. In fact, that very bed was in the room over in a corner. I recognized other areas of the studio too.
“Amazing,” I said. The woman was totally gorgeous. All smoky eyes and red lips and a smile on her face as if she’d just gotten herself off.
“I think so,” she said, and clicked through a few more of the pictures. There were people of all shapes and sizes, femme and butch and everything in between. Lacey had the knack of bringing out the beauty in everyone and each shoot was completely unique and worked for that person.
“You’re really good at this,” I said, looking from the picture to her.
“I really appreciate that. It’s my life’s work to help people feel good about themselves.” Well, I’d say she was succeeding.
“I’ve always wanted to do something like that, but I didn’t have a reason. You know, most people get them taken for someone.” Like a husband or girlfriend or someone for Valentine’s Day. I didn’t have anyone like that in my life and hadn’t for a long time. I missed things like that.
“Why not do it for you?” she asked and I didn’t have a good answer.
“I guess I’m only going to be this young once.” Someday, I’d look back on this body and wish for it when I was old and saggy and sad.
“I mean, if you wanted to. I could take some for you.” I blushed so red that I had to look away from her. I couldn’t imagine being that vulnerable in front of Lacey, since I’d been developing a serious crush on her. She was going to be gone so soon, so letting that crush further crush me wasn’t the best idea.
“That’s okay,” I said, wishing my cheeks weren’t blazing. I looked down and coughed and Lacey closed the window on the computer.
“So, should we get to work?” she asked. I nodded and put my attention back on my laptop. Work. Right. The thing I was supposed to be doing right now.
I blinked a few times and pulled up Photoshop. I was working on a Facebook banner for a client for her upcoming release.
Lacey went back to her computer and we got down to business for a few minutes, with the only sounds being the clicking of laptop keys.
It was awkward. For me, at least. I couldn’t focus on what I was doing. I was too busy watching her. This was a ridiculous idea. There was no way I could concentrate on pixels when she was sitting so near me, her light brown brows furrowed in concentration. She rested her chin on one hand and I admired the graceful arch of her spine. Everything she did was so careful. So elegant. I felt like a total klutz in comparison. Bumbling and awkward.
“You’re staring at me,” she said, and I almost died right there.
“Sorry,” I said. She swiveled in her chair and stared right back.
“It’s okay,” she said.
“Is it?” I asked, licking my lips. They were extremely dry for some reason.
“Yeah. You can look at me all you want.”
“Do you want me to look at you?” I needed some clarity, but I was terrified of getting it. So far, things seemed to be going in a good direction. But I’d been wrong before. Many times. I had a habit of misreading situations and getting myself into trouble.
Lacey started laughing.
“I feel like I’m too old to be coy. I like you. And I am getting the feeling that you like me?” she asked. I nodded.
“You’re into me?” I asked, my voice squeaking. I was really failing at this. She was probably going to second-guess everything now that I’d started talking.
“Yeah, little bit. Is that okay?” Was she serious?
“You’re asking me if it’s okay that a ridiculously sexy woman is somehow into me? Uh, yeah. It’s pretty much okay.” I laughed a little hysterically. I really was blowing it.
“Ridiculously sexy? Oh, I like that,” she said, getting up from her chair and coming toward me.
“You are. Ridiculously sexy.” She leaned down and took my laptop off my knees and set it on the floor.
“Well, I think you’re ridiculously sexy,” she said, leaning forward and then pausing with her face a breath away from mine. “Do you think I could kiss you?” My answer was to push forward and meet her lips with mine.
Oh. Wow. It was a sweet kiss. A brief kiss. But it was perfect. Her mouth curved into a smile.
“I’ve been wanting to do that since the moment I met you,” she said. We were so close I could count her eyelashes.
“Really?” I asked, breathless. I’d forgotten that I needed to keep breathing. The kiss had knocked me completely off my axis. Just one little kiss.
“Yeah. But I wasn’t sure if you were into me, or available or . . . anyway.” I almost burst out laughing because this was somehow happening.
“I am. Into you and available.” She licked her bottom lip.
“Good.” She leaned in for another kiss. My fingers curled against the back of her neck and pulled her closer. We were at an awkward angle, but it didn’t matter. Lacey was a damn good kisser.
Damn good.
Something brushed against my leg and I jumped, but it was just Murder. I laughed and Lacey picked him up.
“Little brat. You always get mad when the attention is not on you.” She nuzzled him and he purred like a tank. Way to clam-jam, Murder.
Lacey growled at Murder and set him down.
“Sorry about that,” she said, her cheeks just a little pink.
“It’s okay,” I said, wondering when we’d be going back to kissing. Or something more. There was a bed in here and a lock on the door.
“There’s just one little thing I think we should talk about before we go further,” she said. Dammit. Of course there was a catch. There was always a catch.
“And what’s that?” I asked, not really wanting to know the answer.
“The fact that I’m leaving in a few days.” Oh, that. I’d completely forgotten about that because of the kissing.
“Right,” I said. “I mean, that sucks, but can’t we still have fun for a few days?” I wasn’t really looking for anything long-term anyway. My feelings for Lacey were strong, but I’d had strong feelings before. I guess I was fickle. I fell hard and fast, but then I somehow moved on to the next shiny person. It would be nice to have something for a little while.
“You’re okay with something quick?” she asked.
“I mean, if you are. I am. You’re hot and I’m into you and you’re a great kisser and you’re smart and interesting and I would like to spend some time with you. Whatever that means.” It wasn’t exactly the best sales pitch, but it was the best I could do.
Lacey laughed a little.
“You’re so cute. So fucking cute.”
“Thank you,” I said, blushing a little.
“And you’re okay with the whole trans thing? I haven’t asked, because I wasn’t sure,” she said. I’d dated a trans guy before. I’d been totally in love with him and then he’d shattered my heart. But that didn’t have anything to do with him being trans. We just weren’t a good fit. Different places in our lives and all that.
“Of course. One of my boyfriends was a trans dude. And I’ve dated people without genders and with genders that changed while we were together and every kind of person in between. I like who I like.” She seemed to visibly relax. Shit. I probably should have said something sooner.
“You know that I don’t care, right? That it’s not a problem, at all?”
She let out a shaky breath. “I mean, I figured, but you really never know with people. I’ve only been out for a few years, so I’m still working on the whole coming out part. I’ve known I was bi since I was eleven, so that hasn’t really been an issue. But the trans part is . . .” she trailed off.
“Yeah, I know. And thank you for telling me and trusting me.” I stood and rose up a few inches to kiss her.
“You’re so sexy, Lacey,” I said. “So fucking sexy.” I put my arms around her neck and pressed closer to her.
“Mmm, so are you. I’m a sucker for a girl with purple hair.”
I giggled. “Is that so?”
“It is.”
We kissed again and it set my blood on fire. I got closer and closer until I was pushing her back and then we crashed into her chair.
“Oops,” I said and she smiled.
“No worries.”
I stuck my tongue back in her mouth and she made a little moaning sound. It turned me on so fucking much I thought I was going to die. Now that I had her, I just wanted more, more, more. I wanted her naked and spread out for me to enjoy. But I knew that she might not be as comfortable with that. So I was going to take her lead and see where she wanted us to go.
Her fingers started to move up my shirt and I was hoping we were on the way to getting naked, but then she stopped.
“I’m sorry,” she said, her face going red. It was the first time I’d seen her less-than confident.
“It’s okay,” I said, taking her hands and kissing the backs of them.
“Is it?” she asked. “I just . . . I’m a little self-conscious when I’m with someone new.” I kissed her softly.
“It’s okay. We can go at whatever speed you want to. Would you . . .” I trailed off, trying to think of what we could do in a small town at this late hour. Everything was closed.
“How about we just sit and talk?” she suggested. That was good enough for me.
“Sure,” I said. I looked around the studio and there were chairs and the bed, but no couch or anything.
“I’m staying down the street at the Violet Hill Inn, if you maybe wanted to go there? I have a couch in my room. No pressure, or anything.” That actually sounded nice. The Violet Hill Inn was an adorable little place, perfect for tourists. It was the off-season now, so I bet she was getting one of the best rooms at a low rate. I’d worked there a few summers in high school as a housekeeper and I still remembered the layout and which rugs were the hardest to clean.
“Sure, sounds good.” It was within walking distance, as were most things around here. Didn’t look like we were going to get much done tonight.
“We could also do the interview there, if you want. Or maybe not. I don’t want to push you about doing it if you feel weird about it.” I shook my head.
“I don’t feel weird. I think we should still do it.” Plus, it might keep my mind off thinking about kissing her.
“Only if you’re sure,” she said, saving her work and then shutting down her computer.
“I am.”