Chapter Eighteen

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Pimlico

 

 

SITTING IN A submarine ought to have been the highlight of my day—no my life.

Having Elder sit beside me in a matching bucket seat with his dragon chest on display ought to have been something I imprinted for eternity. Watching him pull levers and press buttons to glide us backward out of the Phantom ought to have filled me with giddy excitement at the thought of sinking into the depths on an intrepid excursion.

Just him and me and a vastness of water that honestly terrified me a little.

Feeling the small submarine, with its pretty lights and large bubble, leaving the shallowness of its pool and revealing a blue-black void below us ought to turn me squirming with impatience to chase the dolphins.

But I wasn’t.

Because nothing, absolutely nothing—no matter how stupendous or extraordinary—could overshadow the words ringing in my head.

‘You stole my heart…’

He said it woundedly. Bruised and damaged and wary.

But he’d said it.

And, God, the overwhelming love in my chest…I couldn’t contain it.

Who cared about the crystal clarity of the water world below us? Who cared how the sea slowly crept higher up the bubble the more buttons he pressed to descend us?

The moment he’d told me I’d stolen his heart, he’d ruined me.

He’d turned me useless and legless as he’d scooped me up, folded me reverently into the submarine, then climbed in after me. He didn’t say another word as he sealed the portal, buckled me in, then cracked a pained smile as his long legs and big bulk struggled to find a comfortable position in the pilot seat.

Had that moment truly happened?

Did he truly kiss me that softly? Whisper that ardently?

Was that all it took to make him fall for me? To share a few inconsequential titbits of my past? Did I hold the magic all along to make him weak-kneed and besotted just by telling him I didn’t like traditional breakfast foods?

For the hundredth time, I shook my head in a mixture of awe and obsession. How stupid was I to think I loved this man? How naïve to believe someone could fall with barely any information. If Elder kept revealing different sides of himself, showing the chivalry behind the warrior and compassion behind the thief, I was utterly destroyed.

I would trade my life for his.

I would never again think of suicide no matter how bad things got because ultimately, I no longer lived for me...

I lived for him.

The bucket seat’s moulded plastic stuck to my naked skin uncomfortably. Why had he made us wear swimming gear in this dry machine? Had he planned ahead in case it leaked? Would we drown in here?

My thoughts finally left romanticism and focused on the new world we entered.

The sky vanished, the garage door sealing back into position as down and down we floated.

Elder grabbed the radio. “This is Viperfish clear from the Phantom. Door is closed. Resume engines at slow speed.”

“Right you are.” The crackled response filled the pressurised cabin.

I didn’t speak as Elder fiddled with levers and switches, activating different whirring sounds and propulsion. Once we sank low enough to make me feel crushed by the amount of liquid, he shot me a smile. “Look up.”

I gasped as the entire length of the Phantom floated above us.

Slowly, as the captain resumed speed, the rudders and propellers woke from their nap and turned into ginormous sickles, slicing the ocean into pieces, pushing the majestic floating home toward a new destination without us.

Elder kept his eyes pinned on his yacht’s belly, his face in shadow from the ship blocking what little sunrays managed to make it this far. “It’s hard to believe we sleep and eat and go about our lives believing the Phantom is so sturdy and strong, yet from here, it looks so fragile.”

My brain heard him but my heart still heard ‘you stole my heart.’ I never wanted to forget the power and shock that small sentence delivered.

‘You stole my heart.’

But you, Elder Prest…you stole my everything.

Everywhere I looked, crystal blue water cushioned us. From our vantage point, the ocean had no bottom—just a deeper blue that stretched eternally downward. Large schools of fish swam too far away to distinguish.

It wasn’t like any snorkelling I’d done. There were no coral or anemones; no clown fish or angelfish. Just us…suspended in aqua.

I jolted as his hand touched mine, sending fiery need straight to my core. I’d told him I would be his friend, sailing partner, and cello confidant. And I would be all those things. I’d tell him anything he wanted to know; I’d go wherever he set course. I’d even suffer through classical music and terrible memories—all for him.

But if I believed I could keep my promise that I didn’t need him touching me, kissing me, loving me, or if I thought I could survive without having sex with this man again, I would end up combusting in utter agony.

Pushing down such desires, I curled my fingers around his only for him to pull away. “Dolphins?”

I nodded slowly. “Dolphins.” The one thing I’d been beyond excited to see had now paled in the repetition of ‘you stole my heart.’

His brow dropped over heated eyes resembling burnings pieces of coal. He heard everything I’d tried to keep hidden. Biting his lower lip, he fed some speed to the sub. “Dolphins and then we’ll talk. Deal?”

I let out a huge sigh—I didn’t know if it was relief, frustration, or gratefulness. “Talk?” How could I tell him talking would only make me fall harder and falling for him meant my awakened sexuality became harder to deny?

The answer was, I couldn’t. I already made his life a living hell.

He nodded gently. “Talk. Like two people. A date.”

I blushed. “You want to go on a date with me?”

It was his turn to sigh heavily. “More than anything.”

What untainted air remained in the sub quickly switched to lust-drenched fog. We might as well have been trapped in a bubble of sexual thirst. The small cab throbbed with it, threatening to burst the waterproof seals and let gallons of cool seawater gush in to put out the fire.

Doing my best to change the subject so I didn’t throw myself into his lap, I laughed quietly. “So far, this is the best date I’ve ever been on.”

Recognising my smile for what it was—a gateway out of this intensely dangerous, unknown territory—he returned my light-heartedness—or as much as he could for such a serious thief. “I aim to please.”

“And you do please.”

His eyes turned from charcoal to blazing black flames. Tearing his gaze away, he focused on the controls. A small buzzing filled the bulbous cabin, sending us forward. I sat taller, my attention fighting to remain on Elder but finally succumbing to the incredible view outside.

We climbed upward, chasing the Phantom as it speared through the sea, causing white froth to spill behind it.

And there, at the front of the missile-shaped yacht, were the dolphins.

Leaping and lolling, swimming and sojourning. Having a great old time riding the Phantom’s wake. Their grey, streamline bodies effortless and quick.

“They’re still here,” I said.

“If they’re having fun, it’s hard to get them to leave.” He added a touch of speed. “They’re like dogs…just wanting to play.”

“We should teach them to fetch.”

He chuckled.

The closer we got to the pod, the more my heart burst with joy. This day. Oh, my God, this day was the best day I’d ever had, and it wasn’t even afternoon yet.

“There are so many of them.” I tried to count, but they moved too fast and in a flipper-cloud. One twist of their powerful bodies and a flash of dorsal fins later, they appeared twenty feet from where they’d been two seconds ago.

“Twenty? Thirty?” Elder squinted at the twining, threading creatures. “Not the biggest pod.”

“How many have you seen?” Curiosity rose along with a mild case of jealousy that Elder had sailed the seas with dolphins without me.

My jealousy made no sense. Our lives had been separate just like any other couple before they met. Maybe it was because while he was free, I’d been locked up. Or maybe it was because I’d begun hoarding every moment with him and was jealous of time itself. Of not being able to go back and claim those minutes and hours when we didn’t know each other.

I’m being ridiculous.

If this was what love did to people, I didn’t know how they functioned normally. No wonder people needed psychologists—everyone turned crazy when they fell.

“Probably the biggest was off the coast of Australia. Easily in the hundreds, maybe more.”

“That must’ve been amazing.”

“It was.” His eyes glazed, remembering. “It was lacking, though.”

“Lacking how? I can’t imagine something as extraordinary as—”

He pinned me with a brutal stare that told me to stop playing games. “You weren’t there.”

“Oh.”

“Everything in my past suddenly feels lacklustre without you.”

I had no other reply but the truth. “Me too.”

Once again, tension built. How much longer could we dance around this third wheel? How much more could we take?

“We’ll get closer.” As he guided us from spectator to participant, the juveniles of the pack spotted a new toy and came to investigate.

One moment we were the audience, the next we were enveloped by grey blubber, perfect flukes, and intelligent glossy eyes peering into our bubble.

I swore one looked directly into me—right through me. He didn’t care what’d been done to me or where I’d come from. All he cared about was I was alive. He was alive. And that was something to celebrate.

I was warmer, happier, wiser than I’d ever been.

Reaching up, I placed my hand against the cool Perspex. The dolphin who’d striped me bare pressed his long nose to nudge against me as if saying ‘I see you. I accept you. Now come and play.’

Another wash of goosebumps scuttled down my spine.

Could this day get any better?

The prickle of Elder’s gaze whipped my head to face him. I quickly removed my hand from the dolphin’s snout. I didn’t know why but guilt filled my chest along with self-consciousness. “Sorry.”

His expression switched from awed besottment to a nasty scowl. “Why are you apologising?”

Why was I apologising?

I shrugged. “For being silly? For saying hello to a dolphin?”

His perfect lips tugged into half a smile. “Never apologise for that.” He didn’t elaborate, but his features darkened and lightened all at once. “I confess, you’re not wearing that bikini purely for me to stare at you.”

My skin heated as his eyes dropped to the green triangles hiding me from view. I had the insane urge to pull aside the material and show him just what his stare did to my nipples. How hard they’d become. How achy every inch of me was.

“Do you want to do more than just say hello?”

“What do you mean?” I looked at the dolphins looping around us.

“I mean…let’s go swimming.”

My heart nodded in glee already dressed in flippers and a snorkel. “Are—are you sure it’s safe?”

“Is anything truly safe?”

He has a point.

“If we stayed in here until they vanished or we returned to the Phantom, would you regret not swimming with them or be relieved you hadn’t been so reckless?” He raised an eyebrow.

Regret. The answer was immediate. There was no other reply I could give. “Let’s go swimming.”

“I thought you’d say that.” With a grin, Elder called the Phantom to tell them to cut engines and hold position. Once the yacht slowed and the whitewash diminished, he pressed yet another button and propelled us upward.

Up and up, brighter and brighter as turquoise gloom gave way to glittering sun.

My stomach flipped a little as we popped like a corkscrew and came crashing down on the surface. Considering the submarine was shaped like an egg, we didn’t roll out of balance or sink back down. The constant hum of engines and ballast kept us the right way up.

I unbuckled my seatbelt, flinching a little as a dorsal fin swam past, imagining for a moment it was a shark and not the friendly dolphins we’d seen beneath.

Elder copied me, tugging off his harness and twisting uncomfortably to undo another portal above our heads. “We have to go out the top. The side is still underwater.” He pushed it wide, making me blink from the brightness, then placed his hands on the top and hoisted himself up effortlessly.

Once again, my mind painted a fantasy of his dragon making him fly. How did such a big man come across so graceful and weightless?

Scrambling to stand, I assessed how to climb out. My bones were useless; my muscles an embarrassment after two years of no exercise and lots of pain. But a hand appeared, followed by Elder’s gorgeous face as he blocked the sun. “Take it.”

My heart transformed into a butterfly as I clutched his forearm and his fingers wrapped tight around me. He yanked me upright, through the porthole, and straight to my feet with one powerful jerk.

I wobbled as my toes landed on the slippery outer shell of the submarine. Back on the Phantom, the vessel had looked silver. Out here, beneath the sun, it glittered with the coolest luminescent blue—so light and reflective it almost became invisible amongst the waves.

The Phantom loomed above us with its gleaming brass rigging and immaculate balconies. Images of me tethering myself to one while the thunder and rain did its best to kill me brought back yet more heart squeezing memories of Elder being there with me. Of Elder protecting me even when I didn’t want to be protected. Of Elder understanding and standing beside me as an equal rather than my saviour.

I wanted all my memories to include him.

I wanted all my experiences to be with him.

“After you.” He bowed, releasing my arm as he turned to face the sea. Dolphins lolled on their backs with flippers out of the water while others swam on their sides, their intelligent eyes tracking us.

Could dolphins turn aggressive? I didn’t know the correct etiquette for swimming with these mammals, but Elder didn’t give me a choice. “Go on. Stop thinking. That ruins all the fun.”

“Worry is what ruins all the fun…not thinking.”

His eyebrow rose as if to say sometimes circumstances wanted worry, but this was not one of them. “Suit yourself.” With a smile, he spread his arms then back-flipped off the submarine.

“El—” I darted to the side; my feet slipped and gravity took hold.

Oh, no!

I made the split-second decision to leap rather than tumble.

My tummy flipped as I shed standing for flight, then held my breath as the smack of cool ocean sucked me into its embrace.

Something alive shot by my foot, followed by a quick nudge of something not quite skin and not quite slimy.

Holy hell.

I kicked for the surface only to have Elder wrap me in his arms and haul me from the deep. Water streamed over my eyes as I hung in his arms, extremely aware of how slippery our bodies were now wet and glued to each other.

Memories of swimming beneath the moon with him made my insides clench. My eyes latched onto his mouth, desperate for a kiss.

I’d gone from normal to frenzied in two seconds flat.

My legs wrapped around his hips, partly for buoyancy, but mostly because of the pounding instinctual need to join. He groaned as his legs continued to kick, keeping us afloat. My fingers threaded through his soaking hair.

I need…

His right arm let me go, circling in the water for balance. His left arm tightened around me, his fingers digging into my waist. “Pimlico…what are you doing?”

My eyes turned heavy. My voice thick. “I-I’m…just, let me…once.”

I kissed him before he could argue.

The surge of affection made me breathless as his cool, salty lips yielded to mine.

He let me kiss him. Before…he didn’t.

In a breath, I went from kissing him to being kissed by him. Spinning me with a powerful kick, he slammed me against the submarine and pressed himself against me skin to skin.

His cock seared my core. Lightning bolts sizzled. I rubbed against him, using his body as a climbing frame.

We went from swimming to attacking all in a fraction of a moment.

I forgot how to do anything—all I knew was if I didn’t have something, I would die. I would combust. I would explode from the pressure.

With a savage bite, his teeth captured my bottom lip as he wedged a thigh between my legs. His fingers latched onto the rivets and small ladder of the submarine, somehow holding us afloat.

His kiss turned violent as his thigh rocked up, deliberately rocking against my clit. Tearing his mouth from mine, he growled in my ear. “You want to play this game, little mouse? Fine.” He reared up, wedging his cock against me as his thigh thrust harder between my legs. “Come.”

Come?

No way could I come. Not with dolphins and oceans and submarines and—

My head fell back as he yanked my wet strands, giving him access to my throat. He bit me, but it didn’t activate bad memories; instead, it made my body gush with heat and liquid, the desperation inside me reached lava levels.

My hips thrust under someone else’s command: Elder’s, some sea god, who knew? But definitely not mine because I didn’t know this person. Why was I suddenly so hungry, so reckless, so selfish to use Elder for my own gain?

I gasped as his voice turned filthy—hot and thick against my ear. “That’s it. You know I can’t fuck you, Pim. But fuck, I want to. I want to stick my cock in you so fucking bad you have no idea. Feeling your heat on my thigh…it’s taking everything I have not to spread you wide and sink inside you. Christ, I want you.”

My heart relocated into my clit, thundering with each visualization. My hips rocked faster, harder, braver.

“That’s it. Use me. Come for me. Imagine I’m fucking you. That you’re not empty, and I’m not insane, and we can do something like fuck like rabbits wherever and whenever we damn well please.” His tongue licked around my ear, pressing a kiss to my hairline. “Come, little mouse. Come. Come. Goddammit, come before I run out of self-control.”

His thigh thrust again, and I rode him.

My brain forgot about right and wrong, and dolphins and depths, and just…let go.

The bikini couldn’t stop it.

Dolphins watching us couldn’t stop it.

I came.

The rippling fantasia was different to what he’d given me in the hotel in Monte Carlo. This was a crackling hair-trigger release. Formed from intensity and released with ferocity.

Fast, wild, and crazy.

The second the last clench left me spinning, his hands landed on the submarine with a wet smack. With a grunt, he pushed himself far away from me. His eyes weren’t that of a man anymore; they were savage and primordial and reached inside me to ravage my heart and make me crave to be filled.

I was so empty, so achy, so wanting.

More…I need more.

“Don’t.” His voice was a murder weapon to my libido.

I shook my head, tears springing to my eyes for hurting him this way. For thinking only of myself while he suffered under epic self-restraint. Rubbing my mouth, fighting to stay afloat, I dropped my eyes submissively. “I’m so sorry, Elder.”

“Don’t ever apologise for showing me who you are, Pim.” He chuckled, raw and torn open. “You’re waking up. You’re finding what you want.”

“What I want is you.” My whisper barely made it across the tide.

“I know.” His voice turned grim. “And I want you. And that’s what makes this so fucking hard.”

I dared look up. “I can’t apologise for wanting you, but I can apologise for kissing you. I-I won’t do that again.”

A dolphin swam behind him, the dorsal fin coming close. He glanced at the swimming missile only for it to parry off at the last minute, leaving him to sigh and rub his face with a dripping wet hand. “This is all screwed up.”

Looking at the sky with a tormented growl, he shook his head. “I don’t want you to stop kissing me. I don’t want to stop kissing you. But back in the garage when you told me pieces of yourself…that gave me something I needed. It gave me peace even while you stress me the hell out.”

He smiled sadly, still treading water out of reaching distance. “My mind was…quiet.” He shrugged as if struggling to verbalize what was different now. “It’s noisy again. I need some distance from you. Please.” The fact he’d tacked on a plea rather than leaving it as a command unravelled me. It wasn’t a simple word. It’d been infused with every matching ache he held.

This sucked.

This hurt.

This was all my fault.

“Consider it done.” Forcing the biggest smile on my face, I made it my life mission to prove I was the master of my desires. That I could control myself around him. That I wouldn’t make this any harder.

It didn’t matter it was all a lie.

It didn’t matter we both knew something would have to break and soon.

All that mattered was spending the day together, swimming with dolphins, believing in magic, and forgetting that love could cause the worst pain of all.