Ava
When I wake, I can barely move. My eyes feel heavy, my body broken. Slowly, I blink, that dim light still hovering above me. I just want to keep lying where I am, and pretend I don’t exist, but there’s a pressure on my bladder. A pressure I can’t ignore.
I cry out when I roll over to the edge of the mattress, then manage to stand. I keep my eyes down, trying to ignore the dark, grey world around me. In the bathroom, I avoid the mirror and collapse on the toilet. That’s when I remember there’s no door in here, and I remember the cameras too. I close my eyes and try not to think about where they might be. Instead, I hear his words. ‘Shower and clean up good, so you’re ready for next time.’ Then I remember the other thing he made me say. ‘Shave.’
The tears are falling when I flush and stand, then turn on the shower. My eyes graze over sienna tiles and a stone floor, over chrome fixtures and a pretty vanity, things he couldn’t really change. It’s all lost on me though. All I see is darkness.
A new kind of pain strikes me in the shower when the water runs over my nipples, then my brand, which still hasn’t fully healed. I cry out, sobbing by the time the pain begins to settle. But the sobs don’t stop. Because it’s the pain on the inside I can’t get past. My mind feels like it’s falling into nothing, knowing what’s ahead of me, but then I think of Gavin. His green eyes. His smile. His touch. And while those memories make the pain on the inside grow even deeper, the strength inside grows with it too.
For him.
Everything I do in here will be for him. And that’s what has me reaching for the razor. That’s what has me shaving and getting cleaned up good like I was told. It’s Gavin that has me brushing my teeth and drying my hair while I try not to look at my bruised face and weary eyes.
When I walk back into the room, I zero in on the closet, because there’s nowhere else to escape it all. The light above me has no switch, something I figure he wants kept on so the cameras can see me.
I head to the closet and curl up in the far dark corner, like I did last time. I’ve only been there a few minutes, when I hear the click and start to tremble. The door opens and I see him walk in. I wonder how he knew I was ready for him, but then I remember the cameras.
He moves past the closet, a face I barely recognize, except for the black hair, raked back, like always. He’s dressed in all black again, only this time wearing a shirt. and carrying things I can’t make out.
He disappears for a minute, and I hear things being set up, then I flinch when I hear his voice.
“Come,” he orders.
For him. Do it all for him.
I get myself up this time, and walk into the room with eyes down, but off to the side, I see what he was carrying—a folding chair he’s set up at the end of the bed, with a tray table next to it.
When I get close to the beast, he points to the floor. “Hands and knees.”
I do as he says, and stare at the cement while my hair hangs down around me.
“This is how I want you,” he says, “every time I come in here. As soon as you hear that lock turn, you get your ass over here and wait, just the way you are now. You should be in place before I get to this spot. Understand?”
I nod.
He takes in a breath and crouches down near my head. “I’ll accept that, Ava,” he says. “Consider that a show of mercy, and be grateful for it, but if I ask you a question that requires more than a yes or no answer, you’ll speak up. Got it?”
I nod again.
He stands and begins pacing back and forth in front of me, moving slowly. “I’m going to give you some rules,” he starts, “so you know what’s expected of you.” He sounds so strange, so off, like he’s nothing more than a strict teacher talking to a pupil on the first day of school. “I’ve come up with a handful for now,” he goes on, “and I know more will come up as we go along, but this will get us started. You already know not to look at me. I think I made that point clear. You’re also not to speak unless spoken to, and you’re not to call me by my name. Ever.
“Next, I noticed you didn’t eat anything earlier. I know bread’s not exactly fine dining, but you’ll eat between our times together. And I expect you to finish the loaf of bread I give you every week, and to drink water. I also expect you to keep everything clean, including the bathroom, all the equipment out here, and anything I use on you. I’ll leave some supplies for you under the sink and will keep everything stocked in there, but if you start to run out of something, you bring it out here and put it next to you so I can see it.”
He crouches down next to me and pets me again in that soft way that has me trembling harder. “Got all that?” he asks.
I nod.
“Good girl.”
He stays there, his touch moving to my arm, where he caresses me gently. “I know you’re scared, Ava,” he says, “as you should be, but I hope you know I’m trying right now. I’m trying so hard to keep myself calm. I won’t always be able to, I know that, so enjoy it when you have it.” He strokes my arm a little longer, then stands and steps back. “Alright. I want you on the bed,” he orders. “On your back, and facing away from the wall.”
I’m up now, thinking of Gavin when I take those steps that lead me to the bed, and lie down as instructed. I close my eyes and think of green eyes, while the beast shifts me so my head is hanging off the edge of the mattress, then binds me at all four corners, and blindfolds me.
He’s at The Cage now, I can hear it, and the fear over what he’s getting has my mind seeking deeper shelter. So I search for a memory, something I can use to strengthen me inside. That’s when I find myself in the pool, on the edge of the world, wrapped in strong arms while I laugh uncontrollably. I’m still thinking about that when I feel the bed shift with his weight and feel the brush of his pants against my legs, then brace for what’s coming. But instead of his flesh, something cool and smooth like metal, slides up and lodges inside me. The memory starts to slip when he secures straps around my thighs and places things on my body, sticking to me, that feel like they have something attached to them.
He's off the bed now, and I hear him setting something up, over by where the tray table is. Then I hear the rustle of clothes, and know what that means.
The pool disappears completely when I feel his touch, moving around my breasts, and I know he’s inspecting his work from last time. Then I hear his voice.
“Alright, Ava,” he says, running his fingers across my lips now. “I’ve taken you every place but here. I don’t have to tell you, that if you bite down on me, the deal’s off and you’ll be sure to see a side of me you’ve never seen before. But you’ll be good for me, won’t you?”
I nod.
“That’s what I thought.”
Two fingers slip inside my mouth and over my tongue, then push back into my throat and move back and forth. I try so hard not to gag. So hard.
“Tell me,” he says, “did you suck his cock?”
I shrink when I hear the sullen rage in his voice, but I manage to shake my head. He’s silent for a moment, as he keeps working his fingers deeper, and I think maybe he’s trying to tell if I’m lying or not, but when I hear him say, “Glad to hear that,” I know he believes me.
He shoves his fingers down my throat and this time I do gag.
His fingers leave my mouth and slide over my exposed neck. “Keep this relaxed, here,” he says.
Something brushes against my head, then his flesh is on my face. I feel the velvet skin, smell the musky scent. He rubs the swollen tip back and forth over my lips, smearing something slippery on me. “Stick out your tongue,” he says, his voice growing deeper, huskier. “Taste that? That’s precum. And feel that? Feel that part of me, along the tip, where the scar is? That’s a tender spot that feels extra good, so flick your tongue there sometimes, and keep that in mind whenever you’re sucking on me. Now, open your mouth.”
I do as he says and he slips inside me.
“Now close your lips around me,” he orders. “And no teeth.”
He begins pumping into me, my neck straining from the backward angle.
“Don’t forget to use your tongue,” he says, his breath growing faster. “That’s it. Now relax your throat muscles, like I told you.”
I try to do what he says, but as soon as he ventures into my throat, I can’t help but gag and thrash below him. He pulls out of me, and I gasp for air as he drags his wet flesh across my face. He sighs and I hear the creak of the chair that’s next to my head, and know he’s sitting down now.
I flinch when a soft kiss falls on my cheek, then his lips are at my ear and he whispers, “Brace yourself, Ava.”
I don’t understand, until my body explodes with a surge of electricity that has me arched over the bed, straining against my bonds. It feels like a bolt of lightning is striking me between my legs and blasting through every part of me. I’m shaking, shaking, shaking, clenching my teeth until the surge finally dies out, and I collapse back onto the bed, panting, and begin to cry.
“Alright,” he says gently, wiping at my tears. “Shall we try again?”