Two weeks later, I had a bounce in my step everywhere that I went. My relationship with Marshall was back on track and going well. We were seeing each other every third day. Sex was significantly less awkward, and Marshall even decided to try letting me be on top. It didn’t work quite as well as with Marshall on top, but it was fun giving it a try.

The Soft Serves kept winning, and I made a lot of progress during the day on my plans for teaching in the fall. At the urging of Ian, I went out to lunch with Blake to talk with him about his position at the school. He was nervous about what the teachers might think about him.

I said, “Blake, you’re a coach without a classroom teaching assignment. I’m not sure you will really see the other teachers that much. I think you will be spending most of your time around the gym and in the athletic department.”

Blake said, “I guess that’s good. I’ll feel fairly comfortable there.” He said, “You know, Jordan, I didn’t do very well in school. I was one of the jocks who just sort of skated through because the coaches knew how important I was to the baseball team.”

I did my best to smile at him. Passing athletes through classes was one of my pet peeves. I did everything that I could to avoid those kind of situations. Now I was confronted with one of those former students who turned into one of the sweetest men I knew. I said, “Those days are over, Blake. They will respect you for your achievements in baseball and for how you work with the students. We don’t sit around discussing our own academic backgrounds.”

Blake grinned at me. He said, “That’s a relief.” He added, “Jordan, I want you to know. If you’re having any problems with one of my players in class, I want you to tell me about it. I don’t want any of them to end up in my situation.”

A look of confusion passed over my face. I said, “Your situation doesn’t sound that bad. You’re a coach. You’ve got an outstanding partner in Ian. You’re leading a winning softball team…”

Blake shook his head and said, “You didn’t know me when I first got hurt and left the minors.”

“You were injured?” I asked.

“I broke my leg. That’s what ended my baseball career, and I didn’t know how to do anything else. I didn’t have any idea what I could do as a real job. Fortunately, I was living next door to Ian, and he took me in. Then Reggie found me the bartender job. I’ve had a really excellent string of good luck with help from the best group of friends a guy could want. I don’t want my luck to end when I start coaching.”

“My gut says you’ll be fine, Blake. You have one of the best hearts of all the men that I know.”

Blake smiled at me across the table and said, “Thanks, Jordan. I needed that.”

---

Later that night, I was sitting on the couch looking at recipes on my laptop computer. My cooking skills were still a little on the rudimentary side, but I wanted to cook something for my date with Marshall the following night. He was coming over to my place, and I wanted something more than just pizza again.

My phone rang just as I spotted a salmon recipe that looked easy. Marshall sounded cheerful, but the good mood was a little forced. He said, “Jordan, how are you?”

I said, “I’m doing fine. I’m just thinking about dinner tomorrow night. How about you?”

He said, “I needed to call because I thought I would get everything done in time, but I’m going to be a little late getting to your house tomorrow.”

“Can I meet you somewhere? Would that help.”

Marshall said, “No, tomorrow is Neil’s birthday.”

I said, “Oh, wow. That’s a big day. Are you feeling okay?”

“Yeah, I think I’m fine. I have a meeting at the university in the afternoon, and then I’m going to take flowers to the cemetery. I do that every year on Neil’s birthday. The meeting was originally going to be earlier in the afternoon, but they moved it to two hours later. I can’t really miss either thing. I’m sorry.”

I quickly ran ideas through my head. I wondered if I could be helpful when I asked, “Would you like me to come with you, Marshall?”

There was a long pause, and then Marshall said, “I didn’t think of that. Would you want to? I mean, cemeteries aren’t exactly fun places for most people.”

I said, “I would be with you. I can’t spend too much time with you, Marshall.”

He said, “Well, if you really want to.”

“I would like to. Neil is an important part of your life, and even as we get closer, he’s never going to go away. Or at least I don’t want him to go away.”

I heard sniffling on the other end. Marshall said, “Thank you, Jordan. That’s so wonderful. I’ll swing by and pick you up after the meeting at the university.”

---

It was a beautiful day when we arrived at Birch Grove Cemetery. The sun was out with only a few high, puffy white clouds in the sky. It was a warm summer day, but the humidity was low. The cemetery was on the edge of the city in an area that was once a separate village but was later absorbed when the city expanded. Marshall explained that multiple generations of Neil’s family lived in the village, and when they requested that he be buried there, Marshall didn’t have any choice in the matter.

Marshall said, “I’m planning to be cremated when I go, so it’s really not important as far as us physically being in a similar place in the afterlife. It’s just that I remember the conflict all over again every time I realize that his family never leaves flowers or anything. I wonder if they ever even visit. I’ve not kept in touch.”

I wrapped my arm around his waist and quietly said, “I think I’ll be cremated, too. Then my ghost can be free to go wherever it wants to and haunt future generations.”

Marshall carried two bunches of flowers as we got out of the car. One was a bunch of red and white artificial flowers and the other a small spray of pink carnations. He explained, “I always bring both. The plastic flowers will stay around a lot longer, and then the real ones match the one time that we each wore a boutonniere pinned to our lapels. We went out to the Pfister on New Year’s Eve, and we got all dressed up. Neil bought pink carnations for us to wear.”

It was about a fifty foot walk from the car to Neil’s stone. I stood and watched while Marshall arranged the plastic flowers in a metal vase that was lying beside the stone, and then he laid the carnations on the ground at the head of the grave. He squatted down beside the flowers and leaned forward to kiss the stone just above the name. I was moved nearly to tears.

Marshall stood and joined me to the side. He wrapped an arm around me and wiped at his eyes with a tissue that he pulled from his pocket. He said, “You asked to come with me, so you’re gonna have to see me cry, Jordan. I’m never able to do this without shedding tears. That’s just the way it is.”

His firm tone in supporting his right to show emotion caused a single tear to roll down my cheek. I said, “It’s okay, Marshall. You’re making me a little choked up, too.” I asked, “Is it okay that I’m here?”

Marshall pulled me tighter and said, “It’s completely okay. I’m really glad you’re willing to be here. Neil was a really good guy. We didn’t have long enough to figure out what it would be like to be a couple for the long term. He got sick so early. We couldn’t get married back then. I had a really hard time even getting to see him in the hospital toward the end. We had a lot of dreams, but we didn’t get to fulfill very many of them.”

I leaned my head on Marshall’s shoulder and said, “I remember my dad talking about the trip we would take to Disney World. We didn’t make it there before he was gone.”

“Did you ever get to go?” asked Marshall.

I smiled and said, “Yeah, my stepfather took us all when I was a junior in high school.”

“Was it the same?”

I said, “No, it wasn’t the same, and I thought about what it would have been like with my father, but I realized there was no real comparison to make. We had a lot of fun with my stepfather, and that’s what I choose to remember about it. It was just a great trip, and I got to ride a lot of rides. I went home with one of the worst sunburns of my life.”

Marshall looked down at the stone and said, “I think I would still like to do some of the things Neil and I were going to do together, but I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about them yet.”

I rubbed Marshall’s back and said, “Oh, of course, that makes sense.” I said, “Marshall, this feels really good. I’m getting good vibes. I hope it feels good to you.”

Marshall turned to me with a slight smile on his face. He said, “I think Neil would approve.”

Marshall drove back to my house mostly in silence. He reached out for my thigh and rubbed it while he drove. When we made the final turn toward my house, I asked, “Would you spend the night, Marshall? I’d love to spend some quality time cuddling on the couch maybe just watching TV.”

He said, “I’d like that. I have one request.”

As he pulled in parallel to the curb, I asked, “What is that?”

He asked, “Can we watch at least one episode of I Love Lucy? Since we’re remembering him on his birthday, that was one of Neil’s favorites. He would laugh for hours watching it.”

I smiled and said, “That sounds perfect. Let’s have a binge watching it. I haven’t seen the chocolate wrapping episode for years.”