Chapter Eleven
Chad
It’s been three days since we went to the pediatrician’s office to have Austin circumcised, and his little penis still looks red and angry. I feel terrible every time I have to get him cleaned up, but after hearing AJ’s story, we all agreed it was the best decision. The doctor assured us AJ’s situation probably wasn’t something that would run in the family, but since both AJ and I were cut, I figured it would be less of a conversation piece when he grew up, regardless of who he was living with.
Every time I think about AJ getting custody, my stomach gets all tied up in knots. Not because I don’t think he’d be a good father to both Harper and Austin, but because I know it means they’ll be all the way in Utah, where I’ll probably never see them again. I’m sure Sawyer thinks I’m crazy for fighting so hard to keep them when they have a blood relative able and willing to keep them. But I just can’t walk away without trying. In the short time we’ve been together, my life has been turned upside down, completely revolving around their needs and well-being, and I like it.
I finally have a purpose beyond my job.
I finally have a family.
I don’t want to separate AJ from his sister’s children, but I also don’t want him to take them away from me.
It’s just after two, and both kids are asleep when I get a text from AJ. Can I come over?
I’m about to respond when Sawyer calls. “Hey, Sawyer. What’s up?”
“Hey, Chad. Sorry to bother you. I know we aren’t scheduled to come over until later this evening, but can AJ and I stop by now? There’s something we need to talk about.”
I can tell by the hesitance in his voice that it’s not good news. “Sure, come on by. The kids are asleep, so just let yourselves in.”
“We’ll be there in ten.”
As soon as I hang up with Sawyer, I thumb out a response to AJ. Yeah. Just talked to Sawyer. I’ll see you in a few.
Instead of picking up the mess of books and stuffed animals all over the floor, I change into a fresh shirt and run some gel through my hair. There was a time when I’d spend thirty minutes getting my hair perfect every day. Now, I don’t think I’ve even looked in the mirror since having broccoli with dinner two nights ago.
I barely get to reapply the deodorant I’m pretty sure I put on this morning before I hear the front door open and Sawyer’s sweet voice whispering from down the hall. “Chad, it’s me.”
“Be right out.” Taking one last glance in the mirror to make sure I don’t have any poppy seeds in my teeth from breakfast, I head out to the family room to meet Sawyer.
AJ is just pushing open the slightly ajar front door when I walk out, and the dread I forgot to feel when Sawyer first called settles into the pit of my stomach. “What’s going on?”
Sawyer drops into the armchair and motions for me to have a seat on the sofa. AJ silently settles in next to me. I’m not sure if I sat down in the middle of the sofa or if he just wasn’t paying attention, but his whole thigh is pressed up against mine. I’ve never been this close to him for an extended period, and my body isn’t sure how to react.
Part of me knows I should discreetly scoot over so we have some more space, but the other part wants to pull him onto my lap and reassure him that whatever he’s so worried about will be okay. Thankfully, the sane part of me wins out. I turn my body slightly so only our knees are touching, and I’m fully facing Sawyer. “Well, what is it?”
“I’m so sorry, Chad.” AJ drops his head into his hands and stares at the floor. “This is all my fault. I should have just left them with you as soon as I found out what a great guy you are.”
What? What the hell is he talking about? Instead of speaking, I place my hand on his back and rub small circles over his tight muscles. “Hey, relax, AJ. Whatever is going on, I’m sure we can figure it out.”
AJ shakes his head, leaving me in the dark. After a pointed stare at Sawyer, he breaks out of his trance and looks me in the eye. “AJ’s parents have decided they want custody of the children. They’ve hired one of the best family law attorneys in the state to represent them.”
“What!” I push myself off the couch and tower over Sawyer, not meaning to intimidate him but needing an explanation. “When did this happen? I thought they didn’t have any interest in them.”
Sawyer’s eyes are like saucers as he stares up at me, cowering against the chair cushion like he’s trying to melt into it. “They don’t. I-I…uh, I mean, they didn’t. Today is the first I’ve heard from them.”
“It’s my fault.” AJ looks up with pain and regret radiating from those bright blue eyes. With the sheen of moisture, they look almost teal and are absolutely gorgeous.
Taking a deep breath, I force myself to calm down. I don’t want either of these men to be afraid of me…and right now, I’m scaring myself. Every muscle in my body is tense and ready to spring into action against the nearest threat. I just have to remember that neither of them are threats to me or the children. “Tell me what you know, AJ.”
AJ explains the conversation he had with his mother a few days ago and her threat to sic an attorney on him. “But why?” I sit on the edge of the coffee table, each of my knees pointed toward the men that can help me make sense of what is going on. “Why would she care if you have custody? And furthermore, why would she want custody just to keep you from getting them?”
AJ shakes his head, and one tear slides down his cheek. “I don’t know. She’s a vindictive bitch, but she isn’t a masochist. She wouldn’t want these kids unless there was something in it for her. She only does things that benefit her or her position among her friends. Having illegitimate grandchildren goes against everything she believes in.”
“What about the money?” Sawyer’s whispered question is so soft that I almost don’t hear it. When I look at him for clarification, he flinches, as if worried he’s spoken out of turn.
Fuck, I never want him to look at me that way.
Placing one hand on his knee, I hold his gaze for a long moment, trying to convey my sincerity with just my eyes. “I’m sorry for snapping at you, Sawyer. I know this isn’t your fault, and I was out of line. Please don’t be afraid of me.”
He nods without breaking eye contact. The only audible cue that he believes me is the deep sigh he releases before placing his hand over mine.
His hand feels so nice against mine. It’s soft and delicate, but not in a feminine way. No, Sawyer isn’t feminine at all. Despite being slim and a few inches shorter than both AJ and me, he has a sexiness about him that makes my breath hitch during these affectionate touches he’s so generous with.
With a smile and a squeeze to his thigh, I turn back to AJ. “He’s right. Maybe it’s about Britney’s trust fund. Who gets the money now that she’s gone?”
AJ furrows his brows and looks up to the ceiling. “I don’t know. I guess it would either go to my parents or her kids. I haven’t thought about it.”
Sawyer scoots to the edge of his chair so he’s closer in our little triangle, and I can’t stop myself from winking at him. When his cheeks pink up, I briefly wonder if I’ve gone too far. But that concern dies quickly. Whether I have or haven’t, I trust Sawyer to keep my best interests and those of the children in mind.
“Actually.” Sawyer has to clear his voice a few times to bring it up a few octaves. “She was insistent on getting a copy of Britney’s death certificate. She left several messages at the office. I assumed it was for funeral arrangements or an obituary, but it doesn’t sound like she’d be planning any elaborate memorials for her daughter.”
I glance at AJ for his take on his mother’s actions. “Why would she need a death certificate?”
AJ shrugs then turns back to Sawyer. “Do you think it was so they could claim her trust fund? Maybe if she’s dead and there aren’t records of children, the money goes to my parents.”
I think about that for a few moments. “But there are records of Harper’s birth, right? Wasn’t she born in a regular hospital?”
“Yeah, she was.” AJ seems deflated that his idea might not be correct. “Then I have no clue why she’d care. She wrote off Britney and Harper a long time ago. And her lifestyle doesn’t include taking care of a toddler, much less a newborn.”
I reach for my phone, remembering I have an attorney available to me. I might need to sell a few stocks from my retirement account to pay his fee, but it’ll be worth it to fulfill Britney’s dying wish. Even if they end up with AJ, I’d be happy knowing they were in a safe and loving home. And I know they would be with him. “I’ve got to call Jonathan and let him know what’s going on.”