21
“You okay?” Alex squeezes Claire's hand. A nurse finishes attaching the IV drip and smiles at them.
“First time fathers are always so sweet,” she says with a shake of her head. “Always so worried about their wives and the baby.”
“Actually, he’s my brother-in-law, I’m having his baby,” Claire says. The nurse’s smile disappears and she shuts her mouth with a snap. Alex sighs.
“Really? You’re as bad as Ben,” he says.
“Well,” Claire gives the nurse a pointed look, “people shouldn’t make assumptions.”
Alex shakes his head and asks if she’d like him to get Matt.
“No, I’d like you to get me a double cheese and bacon burger and fries, I’m starving. I haven’t eaten since yesterday. Do you have any idea of the torture I’m putting myself through for you and Ben?” The nurse’s eyes widen and before Alex can say anything, Claire continues. “Yes, I’m having a baby for my brother-in-law and his husband. Get over it.”
The nurse hurries away and Alex shakes his head.
“On a scale of one to ten, with one being ‘not at all’ and ten being ‘how badly can I scar the nursing staff’, how scared are you right now?” he asks.
“Of never eating again? About a fifteen. That something might go wrong, about a seven. Of the procedure itself, about a three.”
“Well that’s precise.” Alex chuckles. “Relax, everything’s going to be fine. They’re going to put your epidural in so if I check on everyone else before they come to gown me up, are you going to be okay? Can I trust you to not eat the nurse?”
“Go, go,” Claire flaps her hand at him. “Bring back food.”
He kisses her cheek and goes through the swinging doors and out to the waiting room where Polly, Ben, and Matt are sitting in a row of chairs against the wall drinking coffee.
◆◆◆
“What’s wrong?” Ben asks when he sees Alex.
“Nothing, I just came to see how you guys are,” Alex says, rolling his yes. “You and Claire make a matching pair. Maybe you should go back in there, instead of me.”
Ben shakes his head, muttering about needles and blood and some unidentified things that Alex decides he doesn’t need elaborated. Matt offers him a cup of coffee and he accepts gratefully.
“She doesn’t do so well when she’s hungry,” Matt says.
“Thanks for the heads up. I thought she was going to rip the head off one of the student nurses.” Alex puts his arm around Ben’s waist and accepts a kiss on the side of his head. The beard is gone and Alex is glad. He leans back so he can look in Ben’s eyes. “How about you – are you okay?”
“Be better when she’s here,” Ben admits.
“Not long now.” Polly pats his hand.
“They’ll come and gown you up soon, you going to be okay with that?”
“I won’t, you know, have to see anything, will I?”
Before Alex can answer, the nurse puts her head around the door, reddens when she sees Alex with his arms around Ben, and clears her throat.
“We’re uh ready for you Mr uh Davis,” she says.
He beckons her over and reads her name tag, then introduces her to Ben.
“Gayle? This is my husband, Ben. Do you want to gown him up now or do you want to wait?” He presses a kiss to Ben’s temple before continuing. “He’s a bit squeamish so we want to try and avoid any dramas.”
“Oh, okay,” she gives Ben a nervous smile, “I can come and get you in about ten minutes if that’s okay?”
Alex hands Ben his coffee, pecks his cheek and follows her back through the doors.
“Thank you,” he says. “I’m sorry we’ve made you uncomfortable. Everyone’s just nervous. I’m Alex, I’m an APRN over at the rehab unit.”
This time Gayle’s smile is genuine.
“Oh, I did a couple of shifts over there at the end of July,” she says. “Are you the guy who was away on bereavement leave?”
Alex nods.
“Yes, Ben’s mother died in July.”
“I’m so sorry.” They’ve arrived in front of the sinks and Alex begins scrubbing his hands out of simple habit as he thanks her for her concern.
“I didn’t mean to be clumsy before,” she holds a gown out for him, “Your sister-in-law is right, I shouldn’t have assumed.”
“Don’t worry about it, I’ve seen and heard worse,” Alex says. “You a second year or third year?”
“Third,” she finishes tying the gown at the back for him. “Ready to meet your baby?”
Alex’s stomach does a lazy roll and he breathes in through his nose for a moment before nodding.
“Yeah, let’s do this.”
◆◆◆
Claire is being wheeled in, followed by the anesthesiologist when Alex arrives. A nurse places a screen over her table to create a barrier between Claire and Doctor Harmon, but tells her she can watch in the overhead mirror if she likes.
“I’ll pass thanks,” Claire says and the nurse tilts the mirror so she can’t see. Claire turns to Alex. “How’s Ben doing?”
“Put it this way,” Alex smirks, “I’m probably not going to get any grief about spiders for quite a while.”
“That bad, huh?”
“Mmmmhmmm.”
“Well, let’s hope he doesn’t faint at the important moment,” she says with a giggle. “Oh look I think we’re on,”
Doctor Harmon has arrived and smiles at Claire and Alex.
“Ben not coming in?” he asks. When Claire snorts and Alex explains that Ben will join them when the … hard stuff … is over with, he laughs.
“Oh this is the easy bit, the hard stuff starts when you get home.” He rubs his hands together. “Right then, we all good to rock and roll?”
“Yes,” Claire says. “Come on, get on with it, starving lady here.”
Alex holds her hand and teases her about the eggs Benedict he’d made for breakfast. They talk about the restaurant and the Matt's plans for the next year.
“Alex,” Doctor Harmon interrupts “would you like to come back here?”
Alex looks up and Doctor Harmon nods. He releases Claire’s hand and moves down the bed. As he does so, Doctor Harmon raises his hands and Alex catches his breath. She’s covered in blood and amniotic fluid, eyes still closed, umbilical cord trailing down to the opening in Claire’s belly.
“Do you want to cut the cord?”
The nurse who has placed clips on the cord, hands Alex a pair of scissors; he gives it a brisk snip and it falls away. From the corner of his eye he sees Gayle leave the room to get Ben, as the attending nurse swaddles the baby and takes her to Claire. As agreed Claire holds her against her skin for a moment, allowing the tiny form one last contact with the body that has incubated it for so long. Claire strokes one hand over her back, then looks up at Alex, tears in her eyes.
“Congratulations, daddy. Don’t you think it’s time you held your daughter?”
Holding his breath, Alex picks her up and holds her to his chest, unaware he’s crying; her tiny body fits in his hands. Gayle appears with a soft blanket and places it over the baby and smiles.
“Ben’s just through the doors,” she says.
◆◆◆
Ben is shaking. Tries to think when he was last this worried about doing the wrong thing and the closest he can come is when he decided to kiss Alex for the first time. Through the windows on one set of doors he can see Matt talking to Polly; she’s laughing and tucking her electric colored hair behind one ear.
Behind him he hears a door open and he freezes.
“Ben?” Alex's voice is different, he's never heard it sound so soft or full of wonder.
He takes a deep breath and turns around as Alex lowers his arms and he sees her. She’s still sticky and smeared with blood but to his surprise it doesn’t bother him. A little tuft of hair sticks out from the center of her head and when he approaches she opens the biggest eyes he’s ever seen.
“Oh, my God,” he breathes and looks up at Alex. Presses his mouth to his, then looks back down again. Alex holds her out and for a moment he panics, then Alex nods.
“It’s okay, sweetheart,” he says and Ben takes her into his arms. Looks from Alex down into his daughter's eyes.
“Hello, baby girl."
◆◆◆