Phoebe felt numb as she stepped inside the large suite. Three days had passed since almost losing Jesse, but they’d flown by in a blur of preparation and travel. Even as Ten had driven through the streets of Dubai, she still couldn’t quite believe she was here. Now she was led into the king of Loa Mali’s suite at the Burj Al Arab Jumeirah, one of the world’s top luxury hotels. Everywhere she looked there was something sumptuous and beautiful, and all she could think about was hearing that gunfire and knowing that she would find Jesse bleeding and dying.

She couldn’t do it again. She just couldn’t.

“You okay?” Ten looked down at her. He still had cuts on his face and hands where the explosion had gotten him, but he swore he was fine.

Jesse was dead. Oh, he was standing at the big bay window with Simon, looking out over the spectacular view of the Persian Gulf. He smiled that crazy-sexy smile that made her catch her breath and he pointed to something in the distance. She’d watched the news report his death and now his golden hair was a muted brown and he wore aviators when they were in public. She didn’t like it.

“I’m fine.” She watched him, but her mind kept going back to those newscasts. Jesse Murdoch, former soldier, killed in an accidental explosion at the club he worked at. It had dredged up all the former nasty allegations, and some of the news agencies were even speculating that Murdoch had been the bomber.

They would have a mess to deal with after this, but Ten swore he would make it right. It was one more crappy thing she’d brought into Jesse’s life.

Taggart had worked quickly, covering up everything with the full cooperation of the Agency and the DPD. No one it seemed wanted to publically acknowledge the war that was happening right in the streets of the US.

Ace Monroe had been killed in the explosion as well. He was scheduled to be buried with full honors at Arlington National Cemetery later that week. “He should have been exposed.”

Ten sighed. “You know Jesse was the one who wanted it this way. If we’d opened up that can of worms, we might have sent the Caliph back underground. It was a necessary evil.”

But Jesse hadn’t seen it as evil at all. He’d explained that he didn’t want Ace’s parents to know what had become of their son. Ace Monroe, Jesse had explained, died in Iraq. His body had simply survived his soul. Everything that made up the soldier had been destroyed by the Caliph, and it did no one a lick of good to ruin a dead man’s reputation.

He was too good for her. Just looking at him made her heart ache.

She couldn’t do it again. No way. She was going to leave when this op was over.

Jesse strode up to her and took her hand. “Come over here. You’ve got to see this view.”

He pulled her over to the window, his hands winding around her waist and his head settling next to hers. They’d been separated for days. Jesse had been in hiding and Phoebe had been working with Ten to prep for their trip. It had almost been a relief to be apart from him. She’d dived into work, studying all the power players and writing up reports on each. She’d found a proper distance.

Now her body heated up and she could feel her willpower draining away. The minute his hands were on her, she was reminded that he was alive and she couldn’t resist him. It was dangerous.

“Do you know what I’m going to do to you tonight?” Jesse whispered in her ear. “I owe you some discipline. Don’t think I’ve forgotten how you disobeyed my very direct orders back at Sanctum.”

“I’m tired,” she managed.

“Won’t save you. Besides, you managed to sleep on the plane.”

Only because he’d dragged her into his lap the minute it was safe to do so. He’d pulled her out of her chair and petted her over and over while he and Simon and Ten talked. At first she’d been uncomfortable with her brother there, but Jesse had been patient. In the end, she’d been draped across his body, sleeping in his arms.

Tonight she would do more than sleep in his arms. Tonight she would let him spank her, make love to her. She would fall more helplessly in love with a man she couldn’t have. Shouldn’t even want.

“God, you two get a room,” Erin said irritably as she walked in followed by Theo Taggart.

Jesse just grinned. “We’re working on it. Any word on where our contact is?”

“He’s on his way. Apparently he has a massive entourage, so we’re going to try to blend in,” Theo explained. “I also just talked to Case. He’s deeply enjoying his bonding time with big brother.”

Case had broken his femur when he jumped from the moving truck. Just being reminded of it made Phoebe a little queasy. If Case hadn’t been tailing Ace and the bomb had gone off where it should have, they would all have been gone. Her brother, Taggart…Jesse. She’d dreamed about it the night before. She’d dreamed she was the sole survivor walking through their bodies.

“What did he really say?” Ten asked.

“He told me that Ian’s a fucking maniac and I better come back to the States and get him out of there. He wants to know why he couldn’t have gone out to the Circle M, or pretty much anywhere else.”

Ten shrugged. “I owe Tag. Also, Charlotte was very insistent. I do not argue with pregnant women, especially not one as good with firearms as Charlotte is.”

“I’m thrilled he’s getting to spend a little time with the old guy.” Theo frowned. “Could we forget I called him the old guy?”

“I’m texting him now,” Erin replied, her phone in hand.

Simon stepped away from the window. “How about you two stop bickering and we get to the reason for our very long flight. Did you read through the files on the plane or just insult each other?”

“She’s the one who’s in the perpetual bad mood,” Theo shot back.

“That’s because my real partner got replaced with a little boy,” Erin complained. She had not been thrilled when Tag had pulled Li from the op. With Dean in the hospital and Alex on paternity leave, Li had stayed behind to do much of the day-to-day operations. Ten had stepped up to lead because Ian wouldn’t leave Charlotte, and Theo had replaced Liam on their team.

Theo towered over Erin. “I’ll show you just how much of a man I can be, sweetheart.”

“Stop it both of you,” Simon ordered. It was obvious Simon was the senior McKay-Taggart operative.

Erin turned to face Simon, her body at attention. You could take the woman out of the Army, but in Erin’s case, it looked like the Army wasn’t out of the woman. “Yes, sir. I did read the files. I think it could be any one of those pompous assholes. I’d just shoot them all to be completely sure. But that’s just my opinion, sir. Isn’t Murdoch supposed to know him by sight?”

“I was pretty much either high or brutally beaten most of the time I actually spent with him,” Jesse explained. “I’ve got three suspects. Until I’m in the same room, it’s hard to tell. Those men are the right age and they’re close to what I remember.”

“Two of those men are members of the al Fareed family,” Simon said grimly.

Phoebe whistled because that was not good news. Every man here was powerful and wealthy and had more clout than anyone else on the planet, but now they were talking about almost royalty. “Damn. If that’s true, we’ve got real trouble. They’re one of the wealthiest families in Saudi. And they’re moderates.”

“They say they are,” Ten murmured.

“Just because one member is a radical doesn’t mean the whole family is in on it,” Simon replied.

“But if they know what he’s doing and they’ve given him any aid, it could seriously damage US/Saudi relations.” She didn’t even want to think about what it could do to the price of oil or the destabilizing effect it could have on the world economy.

The doors opened and a gorgeous man burst through. Six foot four, with dark hair that brushed his shoulders and sun-kissed caramel skin, the king of Loa Mali had been blessed with more than money and power. Even Erin’s eyes widened as he strode in with a charming smile on his face. “My friends.”

About a dozen people followed him, men in suits, and one or two carrying laptops. Three women immediately found the luxurious couches or chairs and dropped into them, posing artfully, as though the king required fashion models around him at all times.

Ten stepped up and shook Kash Kamdar’s hand. “Thank you so much for the work, Your Highness. McKay-Taggart considers you a valued client and you should know we’re here to help with your every security need.”

It had been agreed on that the rest of Kamdar’s team wouldn’t know the Agency was involved, so Ten was playing the corporate lead.

“I’m always happy to have my friends with me. Please tell Mr. Taggart I missed seeing him and his lovely wife. Such a smart woman. I owe her a yacht, you know. My beautiful boat was almost blown up, but the lovely Charlotte saved it.” His head turned and Phoebe was almost blinded by his smile. “Although you seem to have brought me another beauty. Hello, pretty girl. What’s your job? I think you should be my personal guard. You can take good care of me.”

Simon stepped up. “Your Highness, do you remember when I told you about my friend? I explained that he sometimes loses a bit of control when he’s angry?”

“Yes, you describe this man like the Hulk. He smashes things. I like the Hulk.”

“You’re touching his girl,” Simon said with a smooth smile. “He also bites, from what I understand.”

Kamdar slowly backed away. “I was only looking. Did I touch? This was a misunderstanding, my friend.”

Ten shook his head, but Jesse moved in, threading their fingers together.

“I don’t blame you for looking, Your Highness. She’s a gorgeous woman. She’s also quite good at her job, so I think I’ll let her handle you.” Jesse winked down at her. He’d taken off the sunglasses and she could see the amusement in his eyes.

Without losing a beat, Kamdar turned to Erin. “And you. Hello, lovely lady.”

Erin went a little red and stared for a moment like she’d never seen a man before. “Hi.”

“She’s working,” Theo said, stepping in front of her. “You can stop drooling now.”

Erin slapped him across the shoulder. “You are not the boss of me. And I wasn’t drooling.”

They continued bickering, but Kamdar turned back to his team. He waved his hand. “You may go. Chapal, please stay so we may talk to our friends. The rest of you, find your rooms and try to stay out of trouble.” He pointed to the three women who sullenly got up. “Except for you three. I expect much trouble from you. Go out and flirt and bring me back information I can use. A new wardrobe to the girl who brings me the best dirt.”

That seemed to make them move a little faster. Their stilettos picked up and clattered as they moved across the marbled floors. Finally, the doors closed.

Kamdar frowned. “Are we being listened to?”

Ten shook his head. “Theo did an early walk-through. We’re clean for now, but we’ll do a check twice a day from here on out.”

Kamdar stepped up and held out a massive hand toward Jesse. “You, my friend, are a very brave man. It is my honor to aid you in this operation.”

Jesse nodded and shook the royal’s hand. “I thank you for making this possible. It would have been hard for us to get into this place without an insider taking us with him. I know this was supposed to be a security detail. We’ll make sure you’re protected, but I appreciate the chance to get this job done.”

“The United States government thanks you as well,” Ten said.

Kamdar bowed his head as humbly as a man who owned a country could. “Excellent. I put through the changes as you requested. No one will question my detail. Your security badges and conference packages are in your bedrooms. I decided to bring Mr. Murdoch and Ms. Grant in as my marketing and finance leads. I fear if I left them on the security team, they would be on the sidelines for many of these meetings.”

“We thought it was a perfect idea,” Simon replied. “Ms. Grant has a business degree and Jesse and I have gone over enough that he should be able to make it work. He’s going to be the shy, quiet type.”

“Damn straight,” Jesse added. He groaned a little. “Wait. Does this mean I have to wear a suit?”

Simon slapped him on the shoulders. “I picked it out myself.”

“Damn it.”

“My cousin has some questions. His name is Chapal Kamdar.” Kamdar gestured the thin young man with the laptop forward. “He is the suspicious type. Always questioning things. I would fire him, but his mother and my mother talk, and dear god, the hell I would get if he has to work for a living.”

Dark eyes rolled. “As if you could go two days without my help, you overgrown bag of hormones. Who managed to get your last sex tape off the Internet?”

Kamdar shrugged. “I performed beautifully on that tape and with three women. All of them were well serviced. I didn’t see the issue.”

“One of them was married to a member of a European royal family, you walking penis. You could have started a war.”

“She was a lovely girl and so very polite.” Kamdar sighed. “Anyway, apparently there is a Washington politician who is a last-minute entry to our little conference.”

Little conference? It was only a place where the world’s wealthiest men met to collude and set the prices of the energy the rest of the world ran on. Just a little conference, though.

“Who is it?” Ten asked with a frown. “I should have been apprised of any VIPs going to this thing. The Agency likes to know where our country’s politicians are.”

“He’s not on the list. I wouldn’t have known about him attending if I hadn’t picked up some chatter about the conference. I like to keep my ear to the ground, so to speak,” Chapal explained. “He is a senator from Texas. Hank McDonald.”

“The head of the subcommittee on Energy. I guess that makes sense, though if he were here in an official capacity I would think I should have been informed.” Ten pulled out his cell. “I’ll make some calls, but he really is in charge of a committee that oversees energy and new forms of energy in the US.”

“He also travels to the Middle East often,” Chapal said.

“Again, he would likely do so for his job, but I’ll put my people on it,” Ten promised.

Chapal shrugged. “I will continue to look into it myself. I have a radar for these things. Something is off about this. If I find anything, I will share with you.”

“I appreciate that.” Ten started for the door. “I’m going to find my room and make some calls. We have the opening dinner tonight. Everyone get some rest so we’ll be ready this evening.”

Kamdar pointed around the room. “There are three suites off this living area. I have the whole floor, but this is your wing. If you go to the suite down the hall, I have a bar staff on call twenty-four hours a day.”

Chapal shook his head as he followed his cousin back out into the hallway. “Perhaps I will go and work for intelligence in the US. Then where will you be, cousin?”

“You have to have some intelligence to work for them. Besides, Auntie will barely allow you to leave the country. You should kiss my feet. Without me, you would spend your life playing silly games and having online relationships with women who turn out to be hairy American men.”

“There was only the one. Why do you always have to bring that up?”

Thankfully, the door closed behind them.

“We’ve got three hours. Phoebe and Jesse, take the private suite to the left. Ten is taking a room in the center closer to Kamdar. He’ll share with Hutch when he gets here. Theo and I will share the larger of the two rooms left, and Erin can have a private room,” Simon explained. “The luggage has already been delivered so you should have everything you need. Since Hutch is still in the air, I need to call my wife and get her started on a profile of the senator. I’ll have Adam look into him, too. I don’t care what Ten says. US senators don’t routinely travel to the Middle East.”

“Come on,” Jesse said with a slow smile. “We have time for a shower.”

“I don’t think Erin should be left alone,” Theo complained. “That dude was looking at her.”

“And what’s wrong with that?” Erin’s eyes narrowed. “Are you saying it’s so weird that a man as hot as Kamdar might find me attractive?”

“No, I’m saying he’s a king…” Theo began.

“And I can’t possibly be a queen? You know Grace Kelly wasn’t royal to begin with.”

Theo turned a nice shade of red. “I wasn’t saying that. I was just trying to watch out for you.”

“Watch this, asshole.” She turned and stalked off to her room.

Theo watched her, his eyes right on her ass. “I really would feel better if she wasn’t alone here. Phoebe?”

It would be the perfect excuse. If she was bunking with Erin, Jesse would have less of a chance to get her in bed.

“No,” Jesse said in that tone that let her know he wouldn’t be swayed. “You watch out for your chick and I’ll do the same for mine.”

“She’s not…damn it.” Theo disappeared, following Erin into the west wing of the massive suite.

And she was left alone with Jesse.

Days. She only had days left with him. It would be the right thing to break it off now. She wasn’t even sure she should hold his hand, but she couldn’t seem to stop.

“Come here.” He pulled her close and his head dipped down, covering her mouth with slow, drugging kisses. “Let me take care of you. Come on. I’ll show you how I treat my queen.”

So sweet. He was so perfect and she’d caused him nothing but pain. Still, when he pulled her along, she didn’t stop, but went willingly with him.

Just a few days of paradise. That was all she had left.

* * * *

Jesse checked the temperature of the shower. Perfect. It was nice and steamy. Just what he wanted. He grabbed the items he’d prepped for this private scene and placed them on the handy shower ledge. It was time to start preparing his princess for what he wanted.

Which would run completely counter to what she thought she wanted. He stepped back out into the lavish suite they would share while they were here. He wasn’t a complete idiot. He knew what was going on in her head. She thought she would be free to walk away as soon as this operation was over, but he intended to make that impossible.

He stopped. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, her hands in her lap, her eyes on the wall in front of her, obviously lost in thought. He took a second to study her. She really was an interesting mix of the woman he’d first met and the contemplative, distant woman she’d become. The real Phoebe was under all that guilt and he intended to bring her out. She was a sensual, affectionate, passionate thing who loved with her whole heart.

He was going to make her love him. He wanted it more than he’d ever wanted anything, more than he’d even wanted out of the prison he’d been in. That had been about surviving. It was a primitive thing, an instinct any animal had. Loving Phoebe was about living, and he was sure at this point that he was the only man walking the face of the earth who could properly love her. Only Jesse.

He knew damn well there was only Phoebe for him.

“Come here, baby.”

She turned, looking over at him. “Jesse, maybe we should get some sleep.”

Coward. Luckily, he’d figured out how to work her. “Take your clothes off and come here, Phoebe. We’re going to get this over with and then we’ll take a nice nap. I promise to have you ready for work, but this is my time.”

She stood and her hands went to the buttons on her blouse. “This wouldn’t work all the time, you know.”

But it was working now. She shed her blouse and pants as she followed him into the bathroom.

“Why can’t it work?” It felt so right to be alone with her. All the faking-his-own-death shit had kept them apart for days. He’d been worried the time would push her further from him, but he’d brazened through and before she’d known what was happening, he’d had her on his lap.

The key, he’d discovered, was simply overwhelming her with what she needed so desperately—love and affection.

And no small amount of dominance.

She frowned even as she worked her bra free. “Because real life would come into play and you can’t just order me around all day.”

Her breasts were really lovely. She was beautiful and feminine, and damn but he was already hard. “I don’t intend on ordering you around every day. I intend on being your partner. You’re smart. I’ll listen to everything you have to say and when you know more than I do, I’ll happily follow your lead. Off with those panties. They offend me.”

“They’re perfectly nice panties.” She shoved them off her hips. “They match the bra and everything.”

“But your pussy matches your breasts even better. God, you’re beautiful, Phoebe.” He shoved out of his jeans and boxers. He wanted to spend as much time naked with her as he could. A certain peace fell over him the minute he touched her, as though something fell blissfully into place and he was finally complete.

Her eyes went right to his cock. Even though he knew she wanted to deny him, she wasn’t going to. There was something deep inside Phoebe that couldn’t refuse his claim. “You’re a pervert.”

She could try to fight it all she liked, but she belonged to him now. “I’m your pervert. Come here.”

She hesitated for a moment but walked into his arms.

He guided her into the shower. “Relax and let me take care of you.”

She leaned back against him, letting the water caress her breasts while he picked up the soap and made long, slow circles with his hands. He soaped her breasts slowly, not wanting to miss an inch. His thumbs flicked over her hard nipples. She couldn’t hide her response to him.

But they had things to talk about. “I know you’re scared.”

She was silent, only the slight tension in her shoulders proof that his words bothered her.

He wasn’t going to shy away. She didn’t need him to respect some distance that served neither one of them. She needed his strength. “What happened at Sanctum scared you.”

“I’m fine, Jesse,” she murmured. “I’m a fully trained operative. I’ve been in bad situations before.”

She was going to fight him every inch of the way. “You weren’t scared for yourself. You were scared for me, baby.”

The tension in her body was no longer slight. She went totally stiff and started to move away from him. “I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Then just listen.” He knew she wasn’t ready to admit anything and that was all right. “I didn’t die. I’m not going to. I’m here and alive, and I’m going to take care of you. I know you don’t believe me, but I’ll prove it.”

She shook her head. “When this is over, I’m leaving. I have a life to get back to.”

“Your life is with me now. If you still want to walk away in a week, then I’ll accept it.” He was pretty sure that was a lie, but it was one she needed right now. “But for now, I won’t pretend I’m not planning a life with you at the center of it. You’re the sun in my sky.”

“I can’t be.”

“You already are. There’s nothing for you to do.” He pushed her hair to the side and let his lips find the soft skin of her neck. This was where he’d wanted to be for days. He’d needed to be here with her, even if she was crying and afraid. She would be that without him. She would be that way for the rest of her life if he didn’t fight for her. He couldn’t stand the thought of her being alone.

Oddly, he could be alone because he would think of her. He would allow himself to dream about her, to share her with the man she’d loved. But if he didn’t break through, she would utterly pine away.

“Reach over and lean on the bench in front of you.” She only cried the once and then during discipline. She needed to cry and he could give that to her.

Her immediate obedience was proof to him that he was doing the right thing. It was the first move she’d made that was eager. Her ass was in the air almost before he finished the command. She wanted this. Needed this.

“You disobeyed me in a dangerous situation.”

“I also helped you.” Her ass wiggled a little, an invitation to play.

He thought about how fast Ace had moved, his gun in hand. He’d turned toward her, ready to shoot, and Jesse had known he could lose her.

Maybe she wasn’t the only one who had bad dreams about that day. “He could have killed you. My number one job in life is protecting you. You made me fail and I demand satisfaction. It’s a count of thirty.”

She groaned and he watched as she straightened her spine, preparing for his hand.

He gave her a moment, a moment where warm water caressed her and the possibility of what was to come hung over her. One moment where she held her breath to see if he could handle her. A Dom’s job wasn’t simply about punishment. It was about making that punishment a moment of bliss.

His hand arced, making contact with her soft flesh and crashing through the shower with an audible smack.

Her whole body shook, but she held her position. He gave her four more slaps in rapid-fire succession. “That’s five. You stay still or it will be more.”

“I thought I had thirty,” she complained.

He smacked her again, loving how she groaned. “You’ll get them all, but when and how I say. Now stay still.”

He grabbed the lube and was deeply grateful they weren’t doing this in his tiny shower. He’d never spent much money on his place. It was small, clean, and in a good part of town, but Phoebe would need more. She would need a house and a yard and a place to call a home.

A real home. One where he belonged, where he was wanted. One where she was.

And it would have to have a nice-sized shower because he liked how her skin turned a pretty pink between the hot water and the smacks. He definitely liked how her ass looked.

Her legs were spread perfectly, her back flat so he could see her asshole. It was a pretty pink, too. He dribbled lube right on it, watching as a shiver went up her spine. “What are you doing, Jesse?”

“What I’ve wanted to do for a really long time. I told you I would get inside you any way I could.” He rimmed her petite hole, already thinking about just how tight and hot she would be when he finally shoved his cock up her ass.

She clenched the minute his fingers touched her there.

He wasn’t about to have that. Five more quick smacks. “That’s what I’m saving them for. Don’t try to keep me out. It belongs to me.”

“Couldn’t you pick another part of my body to own?”

“Oh, I own the whole damn thing. Every sweet pink part and ripe little morsel is mine. I claim every inch of you, Phoebe.”

“When we’re playing.” She said the words in a hesitant whisper, as though she was just trying to remind herself of her version of the truth.

“If that makes you feel better, you can say it.” He wasn’t going to push her into forever. He couldn’t or he might lose her. “But for now, there’s no question that this belongs to me.”

She groaned as he pressed his fingers to her asshole. He didn’t need to ask the question if she’d done this before. It was obvious. She’d had one lover and they’d been very young. They’d thought sex was sacred and it was, but they obviously hadn’t learned that it could be dirty and nasty and fun, too. Phoebe needed to see that.

Play. He bet there hadn’t been much of it in Phoebe’s life. She was so serious and always in control. He was going to strip that control away from her and show her it was safe to play with him.

He slowly worked his finger inside, rolling over and over her flesh, teasing and playing until he finally slipped inside.

And that was when he used his free hand to continue the punishment.

SMACK. SMACK. SMACK. SMACK. SMACK.

She squealed beautifully and her asshole clenched hard around his finger. “Oh my, god.”

“Tell me how it feels.” If she hated it, he would stop. He didn’t need to take her there if she couldn’t enjoy it.

She whimpered a little and then seemed to relax. “Pressure. There’s pressure, but it doesn’t hurt. I don’t know how I feel.”

He rimmed her and her pelvis moved, not to get away, but to keep him inside.

At least her body knew what she wanted. He rimmed her again, opening her wider before giving her another five smacks that cracked through the shower.

She shivered. “Is that all you have, Sir?”

Oh, she was so getting more. He grabbed the prepped plug and replaced his finger with something much closer to his own size. She whimpered and wriggled as he lubed her again and then pressed the plastic against her flesh. She moved her hips, aiding in the insertion. The tip slipped inside, and Jesse watched the way she moved against it. He fucked her gently with the plug, giving her more and more with every pass. Every time he fucked, she opened a little more, accepting another inch until she was finally moving against the toy actively.

Jesse’s cock was fully erect and damn straight jealous of that stupid plug.

He pressed the plug in, seating it. He stepped away and grabbed the condom he’d placed on the bench before he’d escorted her to the shower. He watched her as he rolled the condom on. He adored every curve of her and the way her hair hung around her, making her look like the sweetest, sexiest drenched kitty he’d ever seen. And a naughty one since she hadn’t fulfilled her punishment yet. His cock would have to wait.

“Hold on to that plug. If you don’t keep it, I’ll make you wear it to dinner, and you won’t like the way I lube it up. You’ll squirm all night because your little asshole burns.”

Her breath hitched. “Burns?”

“Because I’ll put ginger lube on the plug and then make you wear it all night. And when it starts to feel all right again, I’ll find a private place and I’ll switch the plugs so you won’t have a minute’s relief. You’ll be squirming all night and everyone will be watching you. They won’t know why, but they’ll see the way your skin flushes and how you can’t quite sit still and they’ll know. They’ll know you need something, but they won’t be able to give it to you. Who can give you relief?”

“Only you. I’ll be good. I’ll keep it.”

He loved how husky her voice got when she was really aroused. He washed his hands off before paying attention to her backside again. He spanked her with purpose, ready to move on. He kept the count, speaking each number aloud before bringing his hand down again. He spread out the discipline, giving every inch of her ass attention until it was finally through and he was able to run his fingers over her pussy, to feel just how wet she’d gotten.

Perfection. Her pussy was pure perfection. It was wet and soft and waiting for a cock. “Tell me you want me.”

“I want you.”

“Say my name, Phoebe.” He had to know she was thinking about him. He could share her in a lot of ways. He wouldn’t demand that she pretend her husband hadn’t existed or that she’d never cared about anyone but Jesse, but he had a sudden need to know she was thinking of him when he fucked her. “Say my name.”

“Jesse.”

He cupped the curves of her hips from behind, his cock touching her pussy. “Tell me you want me, you want this.”

There was only a tiny moment’s hesitation. “I do want this. I want you, Jesse.”

That was all he needed. He lined his cock up and sank in, his vision shrinking down to only her. She was all he could see or feel or think of. His world focused in on how soft she was, the way she moaned and how she clenched around his dick.

He forced his cock in as far as he could, holding himself hard against her. “I want you, too, Phoebe. I’ve never wanted anything the way I want you.”

He let his right hand move around her waist, skimming down to find the pearl of her clit. He wasn’t going to last. He had to make it good for her. She was too tight, too hot and wet, and he could feel that plug dragging on his cock with every hard thrust.

“Oh, Jesse, it feels so good.” She moved back against him. She fought to keep his cock and then slammed against him when he thrust back in. They found a perfect rhythm, his cock thrusting hard and his finger pressing down in time.

She shuddered and her pussy clamped down around him. She called out his name as he rode the mini wave of her orgasm. He kept up the pace until he couldn’t do it one second more because his cock exploded inside her, giving her everything he had and lighting his body up like a firecracker splitting the night air.

He ground against her, milking every second he could before he caught her in his arms and brought her up against his body.

He wouldn’t make the mistake of leaving her alone for a second. Though his body was humming with satisfaction, his hands roamed all over her skin. He held her close, his front to her back. He kissed her neck and cupped her breasts and let her sag into him.

“Are you all right?” He had zero intentions of ignoring what had happened the time before. He was going to face it, get her through it.

Her head fell back against his shoulder. “I think so. I don’t know.”

It was better than listening to her cry through a closed door. He would have to thank Kai and Tag for giving him the kick in the ass he needed.

He turned her toward the showerhead and grabbed the soap. She was quiet, but he wasn’t going to force her to talk. She just needed to know that she could and that he wouldn’t leave her alone. They were silent as he started to soap her body and finally washed her hair, his fingers moving over her scalp.

He turned her around to help wash the shampoo from her hair and saw the tears in her eyes. Damn, but they kicked him in the gut.

“It’s not about him,” she said quietly.

He wasn’t sure she was being honest, but he simply brushed them away and kissed her softly. “It doesn’t matter, Phoebe. I don’t want to push him out. I just want a place in your life.”

“You won’t.”

“Because of this horrible thing you have to tell me?”

“Because sometimes we make mistakes in the past that cost us our futures,” she explained.

He kissed her nose. “All right, princess. Well, if I’m going to be so deeply disturbed, we should enjoy the time we have.”

“Jesse, this isn’t a joke.”

“I’m not treating it like one. I just know something you don’t.”

“No, you don’t and that’s the problem.”

“I wasn’t talking about your little secret.” He moved her under the water, gently tilting her head back. She seemed determined to be dramatic so he had to be the sensible one. He was all right with the role. “I was talking about the fact that I happen to know there’s nothing you can say that will make me turn away from you.”

“You’re wrong.” Her head was back, the water sliding down her body. When she opened her eyes, her hands came up, cupping his face. “Promise me you won’t hate me. I can’t live with you hating me.”

“Never.” He found it hard to hate anyone. He couldn’t imagine hating the woman he loved.

“I’ll hold you to those words, Murdoch.” She went on her toes and kissed him before hugging her body to his. Her head went to his chest and he could have sworn she was listening to his heartbeat. He let his hands find her head and held her there, warmth surrounding him.

They stayed that way for the longest time.