Lectured

 

“Don’t be nervous. You’ll be fine,” Knox said from the driver’s seat.

I grimaced. “Great, is it that obvious?”

He gave me a reassuring smile. “No, but you’re playing with your hair more than usual, so it was a good guess.”

Untangling my fingers from my hair, I sighed. “I feel ridiculous for being so nervous, but this is literally my first day of school. At eighteen. What if the professor asks me a question?” I was about to have a panic attack just thinking about it.

We had left work a few minutes before, which meant I had less than an hour until Knox dropped me off on campus and I’d have to face my fears. Although I was genuinely excited about taking the class, my stomach was in knots from contemplating all of the unknowns.

“Most likely, the professor will take roll and go over the syllabus, then give a lecture. It’s usually best to pick a seat somewhere in the middle of the room—not in the very back or front.”

“Okay, thanks.”

“You can do this.”

“I can do this,” I repeated.

“I heard you playing your guitar the other night when you thought no one was home,” Knox said, clearly trying to distract me from my first-day jitters. “You’re really good, especially considering you’ve never had a lesson.”

“You weren’t supposed to hear that, but thank you.”

“If I’m not mistaken, you even played a Willie Nelson song,” he said with a grin.

“I did. Chase loaned me a bunch of sheet music, so I was trying out a few new songs.” Thinking about how happy I was to be playing again, I said, “I still can’t believe that you guys gave me such an amazing gift. And with Theo redecorating my room, it all feels like too much.”

“Yeah, well, just be glad that Jax reined Liam in; otherwise, you might have ended up with diamonds or a matching Audi.”

“What?” I gasped. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

Knox gave me a pointed look. “We are talking about Liam, so you never know. Speaking of cars, do you want to go driving this weekend? I know your dad taught you, but I thought you might feel more comfortable borrowing our cars if you had a city-driving refresher.”

“Cars?” I asked, emphasizing the s. “Does that mean you’re going to let me borrow the Mustang?”

“The Mustang? You don’t want to drive that old thing,” Knox said with fake disdain. “The air conditioning barely works and the brakes tend to stick. I’m sure you’d find the Subaru much more enjoyable.”

“Riiight. Because air conditioning is quite the necessity in January,” I teased.

Knox laughed. “You got me there. Seriously, though, what’s mine is yours, and that includes the Mustang. After I verify your driving skills, of course.”

“Of course.”

I was a little stunned that Knox was so flippantly offering me his and Theo’s vehicles. Not because I didn’t believe they would share—they were both incredibly generous. I just didn’t expect Knox to hand me the keys to my “freedom” in the form of a car. Although I’d been striking out on my own more often, it was usually to bike to the grocery store or library. Driving would exponentially expand the radius of where I could go on my own.

“What about my ID? On the off-chance I get pulled over, would the police figure out that it’s fake?”

“Nope. It will show up in their system as legitimate. Make sure you memorize the date of birth and address on the ID.”

“I did that when you first gave it to me, just in case.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about, but you really should try not to speed,” he said, smiling.

“I’ll do my best.”

Still anxious about my upcoming class, I stared out the window at the passing scenery. Unconsciously, my thoughts turned to Chase, a topic that did nothing to ease my nerves. Ever since our kiss two weeks ago, I’d barely seen or heard from him. I knew that he had a lot going on between work and school, but I was beginning to wonder if he was avoiding me.

I pulled my phone out of my bag and tapped out a group text to Chase and Theo.

Me: I have my first astronomy class tonight. Do you want to meet on campus for dinner in thirty minutes?

Theo: I’m stuck in class, unfortunately. Text me when you’re done with class and I’ll give you a ride home. Good luck and enjoy yourself!

Me: Thanks!

Although Theo responded immediately, after a few minutes, there was still no text from Chase, and my heart sank. Am I overreacting? When my phone finally vibrated, I took a deep breath before opening the message.

Chase: I can’t tonight, sorry.

Disappointed, I returned my phone to my bag. I was determined to not obsess over the situation with Chase. I didn’t even know if there was a situation at this point. He very well may have been busy this evening, and I refused to assume the worst.

“Something wrong?” Knox asked, tearing me from my ponderings.

“No,” I said with forced cheer. “I texted Theo and Chase about dinner, but they’re both busy. I’ll just grab something at the student union before class.”

“Or we could stop on the way. A quick first-day-of-class celebration dinner?”

“Okay, thanks.”

Knox’s expression changed, and I could tell he was about to say something I wouldn’t like. “I don’t want to scare you, but please be careful on campus, especially since it’s dark. It would be best if you go straight to your building and stay there until you know Theo is waiting right outside.”

“Don’t you think that’s a bit drastic? I’m sure there are plenty of other students on campus at night, as well as security.”

“True, but UCSC isn’t a typical campus. It’s spread out and is basically in the middle of the woods. I just want to make sure you’re safe.” Apparently deciding I still wasn’t taking him seriously, he continued, “Remember that student who went missing and then was found dead in October?” I nodded. “Well, more happened with that than you know about, so please be aware of your surroundings at all times. Please.”

“How do you know? About what happened to that girl?”

Knox stared at the road and ran a hand through his hair. “It was a Zenith assignment, searching for her after she went missing; Chase and Theo were specifically involved since they’re students. I can’t tell you any more—shouldn’t have even revealed that much—but I want you to really hear me when I say to be careful.”

“Oh my god.” My mind wandered for a few moments before it started putting the pieces together. “That’s why Chase was so upset during our first Taco Tuesday and then for weeks after,” I said, remembering my attempts to cheer him up when I stayed at his apartment.

“Yeah, Chase took it pretty hard. He didn’t know the girl well, but he’d been in a study group with her the year before.”

“That’s awful.”

“Now will you promise to be extra cautious on campus?”

“I promise.”

“Whew,” Knox said, finally smiling again. “You don’t ever make it easy on me.” He pulled into a parking spot at a café we both liked. “Let’s eat.”

Almost an hour later, Knox dropped me off on campus. Lampposts dotted the walking path, lighting the way to the Interdisciplinary Sciences Building. Having checked my course roster and the clock on my phone several times already, I knew I had enough time to make it to the classroom. I passed a few students carrying their backpacks, but the campus was noticeably quieter in the evening since most classes met during the day.

This is it, I thought as I pulled the door open and walked inside. I climbed the stairs to the second floor and entered the classroom to the sound of chattering. I can do this. I scanned the room for empty seats and selected one mid-classroom next to several girls focused on their phones. One looked up and smiled, but most paid me no attention.

I removed a notebook and pens from my backpack just as the professor arrived, taking her place at the lectern. She fired up the computer and connected it to the large screen at the front of the room. Many students continued talking, despite the professor’s presence, until she called out, “Good evening, and welcome to Astro Four: The Stars. I’m Professor Stein.”

The chatter died down, but an unsettled energy remained as the syllabus circulated and a few stragglers trickled into the classroom. I was surprised by the number of students with laptops propped open on their desks and soon realized that many of them weren’t shy about surfing the web. The professor launched into a general description of the class, practically reading the syllabus verbatim. Apart from the coursework, which sounded exciting, the most notable item was the optional field trip to Lick Observatory on Mount Hamilton.

After the basic course description, Professor Stein asked if there were any questions before she began the lecture for the day. I had been somewhat skeptical as she droned on about the syllabus materials, but once she got to the actual subject matter of the class, she was passionate, enthusiastic, and adorably nerdy. I found myself easily lost in the lecture, and when she concluded, I was disappointed that class was already over.

I stayed behind while the other students packed up their supplies and filed toward the exit, eager to leave. I felt elated by my experience and couldn’t wait to share my excitement with someone. Ever since Christmas, Ethan and I had been texting more, back to our easygoing banter, and I knew he would be interested in my class. I pulled out my phone and texted him one of the more interesting things I had learned. His response arrived within seconds.

Ethan: I take it you had your first astronomy class tonight. Have fun?

Me: Yes!

Ethan: Good. I’ve been meaning to ask if you’ve watched Way of the Dragon yet.

I cringed.

Me: If I say no, will you still speak to me?

Ethan: Hmmm . . . it’s debatable.

Before I had a chance to respond, another text arrived.

Ethan: Actually, it’s playing in a few weeks at a theater that serves a full menu during the movie. Interested?

Is Ethan asking me to go as a friend or on a date? I sensed it was as a friend.

Me: Cool! That sounds fun.

Theo pulled up in front of the building, and I slid my phone in my pocket before heading out to the car.

“So . . . how was class?”

“Great. I love my professor, and I think it’s going to be really interesting.”

“Excellent.”

After describing the whole experience in more detail, we pulled into the garage and Theo switched off the car. “Did Jessica’s semester start yet?”

“Not until the nineteenth.”

My phone vibrated with an incoming text.

Jackson: Would you be interested in watching Penny next week?

A huge grin spread across my face.

“What’s got you so happy?” Theo asked as we walked through the door.

“Jackson asked if I wanted to watch Penny for him next week. Can I bring her to the loft?”

“Of course. We love having Penny around, Knox especially.”

I typed a quick response to Jackson.

Me: Absolutely!!!

Jackson: Thank you, I appreciate it. How was your class?

Me: Fantastic. Great professor and I love the material.

Jackson: Wonderful. Glad to hear you enjoyed it.

I was about to walk into my room when Theo excitedly called out from the front hall, “Haley, your new bedding arrived! Will you wait in the living room for a few minutes? Pretty please? Then we can have the big reveal.”

Laughing at Theo’s exuberance, I hollered, “Okay.” I wasn’t sure what could be left to reveal other than the bedding, since the room was already pretty much complete. We had replaced the landscape photos with constellation artwork, removed the decorative trunk that served as a side table to the leather armchair, and added a small metal-framed bookshelf for books and decorative items.

“Just trust me, it will be worth it.”

Ten minutes later, Theo bounded into the living room and grabbed my hand. “You ready?”

I nodded and let him lead me toward the room. When we reached my closed door, Theo stopped. “Okay, close your eyes.”

I did as he requested, knowing there was no arguing with Theo when he was so excited. I heard the door open and then he gently pushed me forward a few steps. With his hands on my shoulders, he whispered, his breath feathering over my skin, “You can open your eyes now, butterfly.”

Although I was initially opposed to the room redo, I had to admit that I seriously loved the result. I scanned the room, feeling Theo’s eyes watching me expectantly the entire time. He had made the bed with my new pintucked sapphire comforter, topped with a throw pillow in an inky fabric in dark blues and purples with silver stars scattered throughout. There was a fresh vase of beautiful white peonies on my bookshelves as well as a new photograph. I walked over to the bookshelf and picked up the silver frame, smiling softly to myself at the picture of Ethan, Chase, Theo, Knox, Jackson, Liam, and me.

“Thank you, Theo. I love it.”

He smiled and wrapped me into a big hug, spinning me around. “You make me so happy.” When we came to a stop, he held me closer and spoke, his voice barely audible. “I’m going to miss you more than you’ll know.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked as I stepped back. “You’re not kicking me out now that we made over my room, are you? Getting a new tenant? You know, maybe one that pays rent,” I said teasingly.

“Don’t even joke about moving out,” he said seriously, his facial expression almost stormy. “When Knox first asked me if you could live with us, I hoped I’d like you and that we could make it work temporarily.” He smiled, his hazel-green eyes warm with emotion. “Never, in a million years, did I imagine you’d be so amazing or that I’d want to keep you forever.”

My heart melted a little at his speech. “You know I love living here too. And I feel like it would be impossible for me to ever fully show my gratitude. But what’s this about missing me; are you going somewhere?”

“Chase and I just found out that we’ve been selected to work an assignment at UCLA. Logan from Team Falcon is going with us, and it will last through March.”

“What?” I practically shrieked. “But that means you’ll be gone for several months.”

“I know,” he said, his voice forlorn, “but it’s my job and they specifically asked me and Chase.”

“Will you come home for weekends?”

“Perhaps, but I doubt it.”

“When are you leaving?”

“Tomorrow.”

My mind was spinning with the realization that I wouldn’t see either Chase or Theo for several months. They had been such a constant presence in my life that I was already dreading their absence. Not only that, but things with Chase were very much in limbo. I had assumed that we would at least discuss what the kiss meant, but now it sounded like we wouldn’t have a chance—at least anytime soon.