Nick
THE LAST TIME I brought someone flowers, I’d picked them from my backyard.
My mother was sad that day for some reason and I wanted to cheer her up. Instead though, the flowers only made her sadder. She cried as she put them in an old glass milk jug and set it on the kitchen table.
The next day, all the petals from the flowers had fallen to the tabletop and she was gone.
I straighten my tie and then glance down at the bouquet. Tonight I’m going to tell Tess that I love her and ask her to move in with me. I know things are happening fast, but I also know slowing things down isn’t going to change a thing.
She sparkles and shines and lights my world up.
She’s the one I want.
The one I need.
Her building is old and a little run down, so it’s no surprise the elevator is slow. Anxious to see her, I locate the stairwell and climb to the third floor. Once there, I discover I’m on the opposite side of the building than her apartment. I navigate myself up the hall, around the elevator, and just as I turn the corner, I see her, but she’s not alone.
Her Frenchman is with her, and he’s got his hands on her face in a loving way that makes me want to break each of his fingers. When he leans in, I want to run down the hall and punch him the face. After which, I want to throw him out the window. And then I want to fucking kill him.
Unable to believe what is before my eyes, I take a tentative step toward them. I need to confront the situation, talk to Tess, put the asshole in his place. But before I can make my legs move, he drops to one knee and pulls a small velvet box from his pocket. That’s when my world turns upside down.
It’s what happened with my mother all over again.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
This is what I wanted to avoid in my life. The reason I didn’t want to get attached to anyone. No attachments means never getting your heart busted in two.
I blink.
And then blink again.
My vision starts to blur when I see tears streaming down her cheeks. Soft words coming from her mouth. Him looking up at her.
She must be saying yes.
Telling him how much she loves him.
How much she missed him.
There’s no doubt I’m being sucker punched.
I close my eyes. I can’t look anymore.
The flowers in my hand drop to the ground.
Unable to watch him rip her from my life any longer, I turn around and walk the way I came. A feeling of emptiness settles over me. I feel hollow. Alone.
The elevator door opens and I hop inside.
I can’t even think straight.
How is this happening to me?
How the fuck did I let this happen to me?
As I step out into the lobby, I turn back around. I should go back up there and fight for her. Make her choose, but he’s her past. Of course she’ll pick him.
They always do.
This I know from experience.
I might have only been ten, but it was a lesson learned the hard way.
Dazed, I think my legs are moving. I can’t stop the memories from rushing back. The feelings I felt those days, weeks, months, and years after my mother left us for her first husband.
Some kind of scream leaves my throat but there’s no sound. I start to wonder if I’m even breathing.
Just then my cell phone rings. Hoping the call is from Tess, I reach for it. It’s not her. It’s Hayden, and I need the distraction so I hit accept. As soon as I do, I’m so disoriented I’m unable to say a word.
“Nick, you there?” he says.
“Yeah,” I manage.
“You need to get to the airport right now. The Feds are at the realtor’s office we used for the land deal in Miami and have an order to freeze the pending sale.”
Work.
My life.
My entire life.
It’s all I have left. All I ever had.
In a rush, I walk out into the cold of the night. “What the fuck? Why?”
“They’re saying illegal funds were used to secure the land.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“I know. We need to get down there and prove the money is legit. I got us the last flight out tonight.”
I open the door to my Rover and hop in. “Text me the flight details. I’m on my way.”
Once I hang up, I take a moment to contemplate what to do about Tess. I could blow her off altogether, but I can’t seem to do that. I want her to see my name. Remember me. Feel something when she reads my name, even if she is with him now. And so I send her a quick text.
Not going to make it tonight. Something came up. I have to fly to Miami. Don’t know when I’ll be back.
Feeling like my heart has just been ripped from my chest, I start my car. And then as I put the car in drive, I look up at her building. I hadn’t thought much about her six year relationship with Ansel Gaspard since the two of us got together. It didn’t appear that he was ever on her mind. And hence, I never thought of myself as the rebound guy.
I guess I should have.
My bad.