Present Day
I WAIT. ONE SECOND. TWO. Five. When I get to ten, I stop waiting.
My large strides take me inside, and a security guard holds his tattooed arms out. “Hey there. Can I help you?”
I flash my badge at him and jog to the stairs, ignoring him as he says something I don’t care to hear. I take the time to appreciate Livvie at least has a security guard in the lobby of her building, but that’s the only second my brain allows it to be distracted from my goal.
Finding her door, I knock immediately. A lock clicks, the knob turns, and then the door opens. “Forget something, Ad-” Livvie stops talking midsentence, snapping her mouth shut so hard her teeth clatter and her skin pales.
God, she’s so beautiful.
“Hi, Butterfly.”
She becomes paralyzed. I watch as her body stiffens. Her lips barely part, and with one hand on the knob, she doesn’t even blink.
Nothing.
“Livvie, baby, you’re safe now. It’s finally over.” I take a step, close enough to get a whiff of coconuts, and it takes me back. It brings it all back. “It’s time for you to come home.”
Her eyes roll back in her head as her knees give way.
“Shit.” I reach in and grab her. Pulling her to me, I lift her into my arms, holding her close.
She’s real. This, right now, is real. I have her back in my arms.
I kick the door shut and then carry her over to her couch. She doesn’t stir, but when I sit and begin stroking her short hair, her eyes flutter.
“Livvie, baby. Wake up, sweetie.”
“Jay.” She whispers my name and tries to sit up.
“Don’t try to get up yet. Just breathe.”
Her eyes are closed, but a tear falls out, racing down the side of her face faster than my eye can track it. I lift her upper body closer while I lower mine. Probably tighter than I should, I just hold her. Burying my face in her neck, I slowly rock her back and forth and take a full breath for the first time in three years.
All the movies I’ve suffered through with Mel and Livvie, the chick flicks where the girls talk about getting butterflies, I always thought that shit was such crap. Even with Livvie, my stomach never got this funny feeling in it. My chest would get tight, and my heart would explode, but flutters… no. I’ve never felt anything like that. Until this very moment. Because my stomach is filled with the little damn things flying around.
The laxness of her body becomes tighter as she wakes up, and her arms tighten around me. The quiet tears that were but a minute ago are now raging, streaming out as she sobs against my shoulder.
Her body shakes, and I try to be strong for her. Be the man I’ve always been. The one who takes care of the women in his life. Does anything and everything to make them safe and see them smile. And I’ve been that and more the past three years for Livvie.
I can’t anymore.
At least, I can’t right now.
So for a few minutes, I drop every guard. I feel the relief. I cry with her.
“I missed you. I missed you,” I whisper against her ear. “God, I fuckin’ missed you.”
She sits up and kisses me. Her mouth on mine, and her hands on my face. The dreams I’ve had of this don’t do it any justice.
Her teeth nip at my lips, and I groan into her mouth, unable to control the desire I feel in my bones. I lift her up, and her legs wrap around me. “Can’t wait.”
“Yes.” She pants the words and kisses down my face to my neck. She sucks and nibbles my skin, every single inch on fire for her.
Walking into her bedroom, I don’t take the time to look around and toss her on the bed. She tears her clothes off, and I do the same to mine. When I crawl up the bed, she spreads her legs. Fuck, yeah. Her sweetness is glistening, and I duck my head to taste her again.
As soon as her flavor hits my tongue, I can’t control the growl that tears through me. She tastes like home. Frantically, I kiss up her body, stopping to push her breasts together and suck on them for a moment.
“Wrap your legs around me, Livvie.” I don’t have to ask twice, and as soon as the tip of my dick nudges her center, I push inside. “Fuckin’ A. You’re so tight. I shoulda’ gotten you ready, but I couldn’t wait to be inside you again. To be where I belong.”
She whimpers beneath me, and I love that she’s still adjusting to my size. Means nobody else has been in here and that makes me even harder.
“Relax, baby. Just relax and take it.”
“Jesus.” She uncrosses her legs and spreads wider. “Did you get bigger?”
In any other circumstance, I’d laugh, but right now, I can’t hold back. Nothing about the urgency I feel is funny. “Please tell me you’re good now?”
She takes a breath and puts her legs back where they were. “I’m good, Jay.”
“Thank God.” Then I fuck her. I slam into her so hard the headboard puts a dent in the wall. Fuck her so deep I feel like she’s gonna taste my cum in her throat when I fill up her pussy.
It’s better than it’s ever been. Being with her again right now is so damn good I feel like I’m the one about to pass out. This is everything. This is how we’re supposed to be.
I feel her getting tighter around me and I can’t take it anymore. She pants my name, and I howl hers as both of our releases take us over the edge at the same time. The power of it suffocates me, and I struggle to suck in any air. But as the intensity slowly fades, so does the pressure on my chest and I relish the feeling of being able to take a full breath.
I don’t let her go as I memorize how she feels again. I can’t let any part of her go as I explore her once again. Her new body and her shorter hair. I run my fingers through the soft strands. Trail my knuckles down her cheek and wipe a stray tear away with my thumb.
With her eyes on mine, I slowly slide out. Her mouth falls open, and I squeeze my eyes shut as sensations overwhelm me. I lay next to her and pull her close then kiss her shoulder. My fingers slide across her belly, and she giggles, throwing her arm across mine to push it away.
Damn… I missed that sound. I repeat the motion and her laughter makes my eyes burn with unshed tears.
Needing to hear it again, I continue to gently glide my fingers over her sensitive skin. And it’s then that the sheer ecstasy I just experienced vanishes like a ghost in the wind. “Oh, sweetie, no. How long?”
She jumps up from the bed like a cat and runs down the hall then slams a door, avoiding my question. I pull on my jeans and go to the closed door, laughing when the knob doesn’t budge. “Open it or I’ll break it down,” I warn. “One. Two. Th—”
The door swings open, and she tries to distract me by running out of it, but I grab her by her wrist. She swings at me and the shock of her fist coming at me almost allows her to get a shot in. Reflex makes me duck of the way. “Stop.” A firm tug on her other hand and she’s in front of me. I walk her backward until she’s against the wall then hold her hands above her head. She avoids looking at me which pisses me off almost as much as what I saw.
This is definitely not what I expected. There were so many other ways I thought this was going to go. I’d prepared myself for a plethora of possibilities. I even imagined pinning her to the wall just like this. But the reason for doing so could not have been further from why we’re currently in this position.
The images of what I could do to her like this fight for control, but I push them aside and focus on the fact that my woman has scars all over her arms. New scars. And I know what caused them.
I drag my eyes up from her face to her wrists. A shudder of anger makes my jaw twitch. “How. Long?”