“THIS IS PRETTY INCREDIBLE. YOU know that, right?” Adrian asks me.
We’re sitting on my couch looking at all the gifts from Jay. After he left yesterday, I sat on the floor and opened each one of the tokens of love he gave me. There was jewelry for our anniversary, a t-shirt that said World’s Prettiest Auntie, candles with my favorite coconut scent, and when my favorite singer released a new album, he bought that CD and had a note on it that said just because.
A little figurine of a woman wearing a headset, balancing a wedding cake on her hand and holding a clipboard in the other is labeled Wedding Planner. Even though I’m not officially one, it’s still my dream, and the fact that he saw it and thought of me is just so damn thoughtful. But that’s Jay. Always was that way.
It shouldn’t surprise me.
“I know it’s incredible. He’s incredible.”
“Then what’s the problem? Why didn’t you meet him this morning and go ride off into the sunset with him?”
“After the way he left, I figured he wouldn’t really want to be with me right away. I don’t deserve him right now anyway. I’ll just fly back on my own.”
“What?” Adrian takes another drink of his wine and raises a brow above the rim. “Seriously, what did you just say?”
“I upset him. Disappointed him. And I hate myself for it, but I can’t change it. Here he is, being perfect and loyal and amazing, and I’m being an irrational whore.”
“Stop being dramatic. You’re not a whore, and you know it. How’d you disappoint him?”
“I told him about Paxton and, in not so many words, accused him and my sister of… having something.”
He chokes on his wine, and I give him a second. “What did he say?”
“Well, with Paxton, it was like he knew before I even said the words. Probably because of him coming here in the first place. I mean, I told you how he accused Paxton of wanting to get into my pants right to his face. So, when I told him… he was, of course, pissed the hell off that another man touched me.”
Ad laughs. “Wish I could have seen your man shut Paxton up. I always thought he was such a pig.”
“Anyway, Jay essentially forgave me, or at least, he said he did. I don’t know. I mean he knows I love him, but I also know I hurt him. I knew it before the moment it happened. I didn’t even want it to happen in the first place, but… I just regret my reaction to it so much, and I’m so mad at myself for being so weak. And then he heard me accusing my sister of being… overly concerned for Jay.”
Adrian turns sideways on the couch. “Girlie. Listen to me. Up until seven hours ago, I thought your name was Kay Summers. But you’ve enlightened me, and through two bottles of wine, I’ve listened to you tell me your entire life story. But out of all the things you’ve said, you know what’s the one thing that stood out the most?”
“No, what?”
“That whenever you say his name, your face lights up.”
I smile and can feel my cheeks warm. “I know.”
“I know you know. And I know you love him. If he forgave you, you’ve gotta forgive yourself, Olive. God, that sounds weird, like I’m sitting in my therapist’s office.”
We both chuckle.
“You’ve been through the wringer. And I know that you had a moment with Pax, but what happened between you two doesn’t make you a whore. And honey, it’s not like you had sex with him. You didn’t even touch him.”
I didn’t. Couldn’t bring myself to touch him, and I subconsciously wonder if that’s why I didn’t push him away. Because I just didn’t want my hands on him at all. Not then and not ever.
“Give yourself a break.”
“Easier said than do—”
A pounding on the door makes us both jump. I giggle and get up to answer the door. We ordered Chinese since I declared that we would not be leaving this apartment today until every last thing I owned was packed and ready to go.
When I open the door, I smile at the deliveryman.
“Hi. I just need you to sign the receipt since you paid over the phone.” He hands me the paper to sign, and I scribble my name on it after leaving a tip then exchange that for the bag of food.
“Thank you.”
“Thank you. Have a good night.”
After setting the bag on the kitchen table, I open it and immediately realize they forgot my egg roll. “Dammit. Every time!”
“They forget your egg roll?” Adrian asks.
“Yes. Ugh.” I rush to the door, hoping I can catch him. When I yank it open, I run into a wall. But as soon as a set of arms wrap around me and I’m lifted off the ground, I realize it’s not a wall. Nope. Not even close. Jay lifts me by my butt and simultaneously grabs my hair in the back. I catch a glimpse of his face before his mouth slants over mine.
The moment he touches his tongue to mine, he tightens his grip and growls low in his throat. In the distance, I hear a door slammed a second before I’m pressed against it. He pins me there with his hips and cradles my face, angling my head to get deeper access to my mouth.
For as rough as he’s dominating me, his touch is gentle. His fingers graze along my jawline and gently skate down my neck, igniting everything inside me. God, this is perfect. This is what it’s like when we’re together.
I hold on to him harder. Afraid that if I let go, he’s going to disappear. I don’t want him to leave me again.
He pulls his head back and stares at me. Soul-to-soul, heart-to-heart.
“You’re coming home with me.”
I smile at him.
“I got to the state line and turned around. You know why?”
“Why?”
“Because I can’t live without you. And I can’t go back home without you. I’ve barely survived the past three years, and I’m not letting anything stand in my fuckin’ way of getting you back. That includes you and whatever unjustified reason you’ve concocted in that brain of yours that led you to believe you shouldn’t come back with me. You’re what makes me better, Livvie. You’re the only one who makes me want to get up and seize the fucking day because I know at the end of it I get to have you.” He lowers his forehead to mine. “I don’t care about anything else, baby. Just come home with me. Please.”
“If you guys would just scoot, I’ll be out of your hair,” Adrian says with amusement.
The room practically vibrates with the fury pouring off Jay. His features harden, his eyes darken, and he slowly lowers me to the ground before he turns around. “Jay, this is Adrian. Adrian, this is Jay.”
Jay doesn’t offer his hand to shake or even acknowledge the other man, and I quickly explain, “He was here helping me pack.”
I watch as Jay blinks then focuses around the apartment a bit more. His hand over mine relaxes a tiny bit, and he again doesn’t say anything. But this time it’s because he’s speechless as he takes in the packed boxes.
“He came over this morning to check on me because he overheard me telling Paxton that I wasn’t coming back after last night. Adrian is the manager at Savor. We talked, I gave him a brief rundown, and then he came this morning with boxes and packing tape.”
“You’re packed already,” Jay states without looking at me.
“Yeah. I am. I needed to arrange a moving truck and a flight. I wasn’t…” I pause, not sure how to word it. “I just…”
“She just thought that she didn’t deserve you, since ya know, she thought you were sweet on her sister or something. Even though she knows that the only reason she came up with the harebrained idea was because she could use that as a shield.” Adrian stops talking when I widen my eyes at him and give him the universal sign to shut the hell up.
“She does like to build some pretty solid shields,” Jay agrees.
“Right. And we both know that she loves you somethin’ fierce. Every time she said your name, her eyes smiled. I didn’t even know eyes could do that, but they did.”
Jay looks down at me with a soft expression that brings tears to my smiling eyes.
“So we talked, and I told her how stupid she was for letting you get away, and she agreed because I’m always right anyway.”
Jay smirks, and I giggle a little bit.
“I think you can understand how hard this is for her and how rough she’s had it the past few years. I knew she was hiding something, and no matter how happy she was, there was always a hint of underlying sadness to her. And now that I know why, I can’t imagine how scary that must have been for her to be plopped in another state across the country from everything she’s ever known with a murderer threatening her and a boyfriend who didn’t give her a chance to say goodbye to her family.”
He looks over his shoulder at Adrian and hangs his head. “Yeah.” Then lifts it and looks back at me.
“So, I think that you get how she’s feeling.”
“I do get how she’s feeling,” Jay says to me in answer to Adrian. “I hate that for her. I hate that we were apart at all, and I hate that there’s doubt about how much I want her when I want absolutely nothing more in the world than to just take her home with me so we can start our life like we were supposed to. I want her in my bed so she’s the first thing I see and the last thing I look at before I fall asleep.”
“I think she wants that too.”
I have to clear my throat before I speak, “Yes. She wants that.”
“Then it’s settled.” Adrian claps. “Glad we worked that out.” He holds his arms out, and I reluctantly pull back from Jay to hug Adrian.
“Thank you,” I say into his chest as I hug him.
“You’re welcome. Don’t lose my number, okay?” He gives me a final squeeze before pulling away.
“Never.” I wipe my face with the sleeve of my hoodie.
He and Jay shake hands before Adrian walks out. Before I know it, I’m pulled into another set of stronger arms that squeeze me tight. “Tell me about him.”
I walk us back over to the couch and settle in next to him, snuggled against his chest. “I met him the first time I went into Savor; that’s the restaurant. It was about a month or so after I’d gotten here when I finally left the house.”
“You didn’t leave for a month?”
“Not really. But I didn’t go back there until about a year ago to interview for a job as a hostess there.”
“Where did you work before?”
My shoulders rise and fall dramatically. “Everywhere. I think I had seven different jobs in two years. I couldn’t hold anything down. I’d miss shifts because I couldn’t get out of bed or I would start crying while I was supposed to be working. Crap like that.”
His fingers make a pattern on my back. “I’m so sorry you struggled so much. God, I can’t believe it took three years.”
“Why did it take so long?”
“Finish your story first then I’ll tell you.”
“Well, I interviewed, and Paxton remembered me from when I was there the first time.”
A disbelieving huff accentuates Jay’s exhale.
“Adrian didn’t, but he and I became friends. I’ve only known him really for about a year, but honestly, I feel like it’s been my whole life.”
“He gay?”
I laugh. “Says he’s bi, but I don’t believe that for a second. He doesn’t even look at women. I think he just says that to satisfy his family’s unacceptance of him being gay.”
Jay nods, his thoughts a mile away. “Marco built his empire over decades. He’d gotten away with murder, literally, for years because of who was in his pocket. You would be surprised how many people will turn a blind eye for some cash… and the threat of Marco and his cronies. Charges would get dropped. Cases dismissed. Witnesses would disappear.” He emphasizes the last part with a hard edge to his voice.
The disdain is unrecognizable almost. “I saw him holding this woman… Ty’s woman, her pregnant belly exposed through her ripped shirt. And God, Livvie. Her face. She was beat up and dirty. There were tracks of tears going down her cheeks.” He shakes his head. “I’ve seen the result of his… trademark. The dead girls, the drugged ones who are barely alive when they’re found, but I’ve never actually seen his interaction with them.
“Ty has, though. Marco had a hand in Ty’s mother’s death. He’s witnessed the pure evil he instills, and I just… to actually see the devil in him while he’s threatening her life and after he… I took too much pleasure in killing him, Olive. I shouldn’t be happy about ending a life, no matter what, but I smiled when his head hit the ground and split open. Sorry.” He clears his throat. “You don’t need to hear this shit.”
“It’s fine.” I want to be here for him. It’s been too long since I’ve been able to let him lean on me when he needs it. I always could tell when he’d had a rough shift by how he’d hold me when he saw me at the end of the day. “I’m here.”
He kisses the top of my head. “Jessa is her name. Ty’s girl. And she was so brave and so strong, and even though everything turned out okay, and she’s safe now… if that were you. If I’d have had to see him with a fuckin’ gun to your head or his filthy hands on you. If he’d have touched you… I honestly don’t know if I could live with myself for letting that happen.”
“You can’t protect me from the world, Jay. Bad things can happen still.”
“I know.” He grunts. “Fuck, do I know. But I can try; I can do anything and everything to make sure it doesn’t.”
Having him back and saying those things makes me feel so safe. Just him being near makes the entire world cease to exist, so it’s only us.
I turn in his arms and stand between his legs. I remove my hoodie then my shirt. My pants follow, and I reach over to take his shirt off. My hands go for his fly, and I loosen it enough to pull his jeans to his knees then reach beneath his boxers to stroke him.
He rests the back of his head on the couch as I lower myself to the ground. I use my thumb to rub the bit of precum around the head of his cock then lean over and flick it with my tongue.
“Christ,” he groans.
I don’t tease him but dive right in, sucking him and stroking where my mouth can’t reach. He fists my short hair and uses it as an anchor. “Livvie,” he groans. I let out a screech when he reaches beneath my arms and yanks me up.
“What are you doing?”
He doesn’t answer but boosts me up higher until I can feel his breath between my legs. “Take these off.” His teeth tug on the thin fabric, and I push up on my right leg and pull my thong down.
As soon as the material floats on the thigh of one leg, Jay pulls me to him and sucks my pussy into his mouth. My upper body is falling over the back of the couch, and I dig my toes in the cushions when his tongue spears me. “Oh, my God.”
His hands palm my ass as he urges me to ride his face.
I love it.
I love him, and I missed him.
He works me as only he can. Brings me to the edge and back down then up again. “Come for me, Livvie.” He nips at my clit, and I scream. “Get there. Come all over my face.” I can’t keep track of everything he’s doing… It’s sensory overload, and I chant his name as I climax.
He pulls me down and centers me over him before thrusting up as the lingering tremors from my orgasm flutter around him.
“Fuuuck.”
I ride him hard, chasing the fading pleasure. He bucks up so hard I lose his cock, but he stands and pushes me down, my face in the cushions. My legs are in the air behind me, and he opens them wide then impales me before he fucks me into the couch.
I’m balancing on my shoulder and the side of my head as he makes me see stars every time his balls swing up and hit my super-sensitive clit. “Get there, baby.” He growls the words, and his grip on my legs gets tighter.
“I’m close.”
“Not close enough.” He drops my legs and lifts me up before they can hit the ground. With him still inside me, reverse straddling him, he carries me to the bedroom and drops me on the bed.
I cry out when he slips out of me then gasp when he grabs my ankles and flips me over to my back. My knees fall open as he centers himself over me, and when he slides in, I wrap my legs around his back. He leans down so his chest is on top of mine and pulls me tight then skims his lips over mine. “Still not close enough.”
My tongue peeks out, and he flicks the tip with his own then closes the millimeters between our mouths. He growls; I moan. Our limbs intertwine, and when my back arches up, he grunts my name over and over as we both spiral into ecstasy together.