Chapter 19

Quinn

Tyler had left the hospital before I did. He left me sitting in that chair, my feet stretched out and my heart bursting in my chest, unable to comprehend what I’d done. I’d put a little girl in danger. I’d fallen in love with someone who couldn’t possibly love me back. I’d come to Raleigh to start over, but I was banging my skull against some sort of impenetrable wall. I could feel the cracks in my bones.

I drove with the radio off, listening to my staggered inhales and exhales, counting all the memories I had with Rachel. The science experiments we’d begun together. The names she’d chosen for her plants, Artemis and Othello. How she’d told me she ‘didn’t really need friends,’ reminding me so much of myself at her age. Would I ever be allowed to see her again or to spend time with her? Or would Marnie wield her ugly weapon—her motherhood—and prevent it for good?

For Rachel’s sake, I prayed Tyler would find a way to move her out west. She deserved the intrigue of another school, to mold her brain over a better curriculum. At 23 years old, I already felt decrepit, old, as if I’d seen enough and done enough in my life, and I needed to let others live in my place.

That included love. I’d had it, once. And I felt it now, with Tyler. But that didn’t necessarily mean I was allowed to have it. That was what being an adult was, perhaps. Accepting your feelings and then dismissing them.

When I pulled into my driveway, my stomach sank into a pit. I’d forgotten about Chris. His drunken ass sleeping in my bed, probably drooling on my pillow. Giving a heavy sigh, I eased from the driver’s seat and began to walk up the porch steps. The night was pitch-dark, already, and the air simmered with smoke from the fire. Glancing to the right, I eyed Tyler’s truck out front. What did he think of the damage? He must be pissed.

“There you are.”

His words sent a chill down my spine. Blinking into the darkness, I realized that Chris was on the front porch, sitting perfectly still on the swing. He held a beer in his left hand, gripping it tightly, and his face looked serene as if he’d been on a Buddhist journey and seen the light.

“Chris. What are you doing awake? And why are you still drinking?” I asked with a sigh. I remained on the porch steps, growing accustomed to his gaze and he looked at me with all the love he’d had before. As if he’d never slept with Emery.

“I was worried about you,” he said.

I felt nothing. I’d expected to—even waited for my heart to begin its familiar pitter-patter. But my face remained cold, hardened after the night of constant stress.

“Listen, if you think you can drive, you should head back to Asheville,” I said.

“What if I don’t want that?” He tilted his head, his eyes glinting in the sudden moonlight. The clouds had blustered across it, revealing it like magicians with the final surprise.

“I don’t think it matters what you want anymore,” I affirmed, drawing my keys from my pocket.

“Bitch,” Chris blurted out, his voice loud and articulate. He rose from the porch swing, trying to puff out his chest in an attempt to frighten me.

“Excuse me?” I whispered, knowing he wasn’t a violent guy.

“You don’t deserve me back,” Chris spat, his voice domineering. “But I’m accepting all our differences, from before. You know, you’re such a fucking nerd, nobody else is going to fall for you the way I did. You need me to love you, Quinn. Or, you’re going to be alone. Forever.”

Chris voiced the fear I didn’t know existed in my gut. My stomach tightened, making me throw myself against the door, eager to get out of his presence. But Chris wrapped his hand around my arm, clinging to me tightly.

I screamed at him, my stress levels higher than ever before. “Let go of me! Now!”

The front door slammed next door. Tyler’s six-foot-four figure, gruff and muscled, with those firm, broad shoulders, marched across the lawn. He stood, his hands on either side of his waist, gazing at Chris and I. His jaw was set, coated in a five o’ clock shadow, and he looked four times the man that Chris did, with his scrawny arms, trying to take advantage of me.

“I know you’re not trying to hurt that girl,” Tyler said. His voice echoed through time and space, making my heart burst against my ribcage. He took another step toward us and as he grew closer, Chris’ grip on my arm loosened.

“Who the fuck is this guy?” Chris asked, his voice lined with fear.

Tyler was now standing at the bottom of the porch steps. Beneath his black t-shirt, his muscles gleamed in the soft light. He smirked at Chris as if he knew precisely what was going on. As if Tyler was the teacher, and he’d just caught the school bully.

“I’ll say it again,” Tyler said, his voice as low as a growl. “I know you’re not trying to hurt my friend Quinn. So you better get back in your shitty car and go back where you came from.”

“Oh really. What are you going to do about it?” Chris asked, his voice high-pitched and raspy.

“I’m really not a descriptive man,” Tyler said. “Just know that if you don’t back away from her and get into your car in ten seconds, you’ll be ten feet under.”

“I think you’ll regret threatening me,” Chris tried, sounding like a child.

“I disagree,” Tyler said, shrugging. “Try me.”

Tyler began to count down, then. With each count, I felt the tension rise. My heart hammered, causing me to quiver, still caught in Chris’ now-weak grasp. I could have shoved him off if I needed to, but I wanted to fade away into the background, and not cause more anger.

When Tyler reached number four, Chris sputtered, “Fine. Have it your way.” He released me, almost spitting. “Let me know when you wise up. I’m the best fucking thing you’ll ever get. You’re making a huge mistake.”

He burst past Tyler, stomping through the grass, and then flung himself into the front seat of his car. I looked away, staring at Tyler. The soft purr of the Prius met my ears, and a grin stretched between my cheeks.

Tyler’s steps vibrated across the porch floorboards. Standing, shocked, I couldn’t fully prepare myself. Mere inches from my mouth, he whispered, “I don’t know what either of us was thinking. I can’t live through this night without you.”

“Neither can I,” I whispered back. “If that wasn’t already obvious.” Large tears descended down my cheeks as he knelt down and kissed me, first slowly, passionately, with his tongue gliding across the softness of my lips. And then, with more hunger. He bit my bottom lip, pressing me against the side of my house. I felt the thickness of his cock growing against my leg, his desire and his anger forming into a kind of tornado.

Reaching up, he ripped at my dress—actually tore it from my torso, revealing the lace of my black bra beneath. His lips drew a line across my gleaming skin before he wrapped his arms around the back and unhooked my bra. There we were, on my front porch, with his mouth around my hardening nipples. A moan escaped me, a moan that allowed the tension from the past day’s events to fall from my shoulders. I could have sobbed as the release of all the stress left my body, but instead, I focused on Tyler and his lips, his hands, everything about him. It was just us, now. Nothing else mattered.

Moving down my chest, kissing at the tight line of my belly, he then reached my pussy. He grazed the tip of my clit with two fingers, watching the way my face gave way to the language of pleasure. My eyelashes fluttered. My legs parted for him. I waited, anticipating, as he moved toward me, lifting his tongue into the soft wetness between.

God, it was heaven. It was as if my brain was a firework, exploding at his touch. My legs spread further, allowing him to dive deeper inside me, to draw his tongue between my lips and then circle my clit. In front of the house, all the other houses were dark. No one was on the road. The stars had begun to twinkle overhead, giving everything a magical, unreal feeling.

My stomach clenched with sudden pleasure. Almost certain I would cum, my head fell back on my shoulders, pressing against the brick wall of my house, allowing my fingers to drag through his dark hair. But moments before my release crested, he paused. His dark eyes gazed up at mine.

And with a wry smile, I knew what he wanted.

Tyler brought his fingers to the button of his pants quickly, thrusting them to the ground, along with his boxers. His cock sprung free between us, eager and thick, with veins throbbing on either side. A small tip of cum trickled down it, a reminder that he’d been waiting, dormant, while he’d given me all the pleasure in the world.

I lowered to my knees and gazed at the thickness of his cock, as he entered my mouth. I sucked and licked as he moaned gruffly. I brought my tongue around his shaft in circles—memorizing its every line. I wanted to know every detail of him.

“Faster,” he commanded through gritted teeth.

And I delivered. Opening my mouth even wider, I took him further inside, deep-throating his cock and thrusting the tip of it against the softness of the back of my mouth. He cried out, but I was already back to the tip, creating a kind of rollercoaster of endless sensations, sweeping him up in the ecstasy of being worshipped by my mouth.

After a few minutes had passed, he was gasping and near exploding in my mouth. As I pulled back, I watched as sweat dripped down his throat, his chest, seeping in through his black t-shirt. Standing and reaching up, I drew the shirt up over his head, revealing us both to the moonlight. I pressed my breasts against the muscle of his chest, stroking his coarse hairs.

“Take me inside and fuck me on the floor,” I whispered into his ear.

He didn’t wait for me to ask again. Lifting me into him, he carried me to the living room, where he draped me across the rug near the fireplace. Randy was asleep in my bedroom, graciously leaving us alone. Tyler’s eyes seemed to wash over me, running from my firm breasts, down my waist, toward my pussy. Knowing he was watching me, I eased my legs apart and then wrapped them around his torso.

He thrust forward, pushing his cock past my slick, wet entrance, gliding deep within me. With his cock buried so deep, dipping into the spot that made me feel like I was coming unglued, I wrapped my legs around him tighter. With a grunt, he began to fuck me from above, gazing into my eyes with sincerity, a passion that was unmatched. I had never experienced anything like this before, and it made it all the more sensuous. As he fucked me, sweat dripped down his forehead as he kissed me. We were a flurry of arms, of gasps, of sweat—and I no longer understood where I ended, and he began.

Pushing at his chest, I rolled us over, bringing myself over his cock. I rode him quickly, allowing my tits to bounce up and down. He reached up and grabbed my nipples, squeezing them till they reddened. My brain splintered with the pleasure and the pain. Poised on top of him, I watched as his face gave way to orgasm—bright, blank eyes, his lips parted. As his cock began to throttle within me, he shoved it as far into me as he could, grasping my hips and grinding me down onto him. This caused me to cum again, falling into waves and waves of pleasure as my body pulsed around him, milking every last drop from him. I clung to his shoulders, riding out these moments before we found ourselves blinking at one another.

Easing myself off of him, I gripped his shoulders and stared up at the ceiling. He did the same. We clung to one another, our bodies spent, and our brains finding solace after such a treacherous day. It seemed that despite the facts of our lives, our reasons for not being together, our bodies couldn’t resist it.

It was biological. Cells divided. And Tyler and I were meant to fuck and be together, for as long as we could.