Samantha
"I feel like we’re forgetting something..." Keeland mutters as he sinks behind the wheel of our family SUV.
I glance at our two kids in the back seat. "Well, we've got the little humans so I'd say we'd better go. We're going to be late."
That’s probably the biggest thing I’ve learned since becoming a mother. You will always be forgetting something, you will always be late in getting somewhere. But as long as the little humans are still in your custody and they’re still breathing, then you must be doing something right.
We give Hannah and Melody hugs and kisses as we drop them off at Lily’s farm and they promise to play nice with the boys even though they indisputably have the cooties. Just as we’re driving up the bumpy lane back toward the main road, Keeland stops in the middle of the road.
“What are you doing?” I ask, glancing over at him across the cabin.
He grins wickedly. “This is the first time I’ve had you alone in weeks. What do you think I’m doing?”
Oh my god. I know that we’re in a car in a semi-public place right now, but I really like the way he thinks.
“Take me now!” I pronounce dramatically as I whip off my seatbelt and climb into his lap.
We kiss frantically. I reach blindly for his zipper as he pushes up the hem of my taffeta skirt. I swear, every time we have sex, it’s like there’s a big clock hanging above us, counting down to the inevitable interruption that will pop up before we get to the peak.
Just as I’m about to position myself over my husband’s rock hard cock, a pair of blinding headlights turn onto the dirt lane. An impatient horn sounds out.
Keeland drops his head to my chest, sobbing tearlessly. “Will I ever touch your pussy again?”
I laugh as I climb out of his lap and he moves the car to the side. Jakob’s pickup truck pulls up right beside us and the window comes down. “Hey guys,” Lily’s husband smirks.
“Hey,” we say less than enthused.
I glance over at Jakob and this farmer cleans up well. He's a whole different man in his suit and trimmed beard.
“Just realized that I forgot the damn speech Lily wanted me to read tonight.” He laughs. “She’d kill me if I didn’t come back for it because she reminded me a million times before I left.”
We laugh, too. “See you at the party,” Keeland says as he starts the car again.
“Hey,” Jakob calls out. “Me and Lily would be glad to watch your kids for a weekend because it looks like the two of you need some alone time.”
Keeland looks like he’s about to pounce on the offer but I stop him quickly, clasping my hand over his. “That’s sweet of you but we can’t accept.”
Jakob laughs, seeing right through my ulterior motive. “Don’t worry, Sammie. We won’t ask you to return the favor. Only Aunt Grace and Aunt Faith can actually put up with my six luciferian kids for more than a few hours.”
I breathe out a sigh of relief. Jakob and Lily’s kids are a bit…much. Especially the one with the lisp.
“Well, in that case," I say hastily, "how does next weekend sound?” I love my kids but I’m so ready to jump their dad’s bones.
The farmer clucks at my excitement. “Call me on Thursday,” he says as he rolls his truck down the bumpy lane back toward the farmhouse. "We'll firm up the details then."
Once we get to the venue, I leave Keeland with Maxwell and Faith and make a beeline for the ladies’ room to put myself back together. I’m sure that my lipstick got all smudged in my rather disappointing game of ‘seven seconds in heaven’ with my husband.
Pausing for a moment in the hallway, I admire a large exhibit of photographs of tattoos done by Keeland. Celebrities from far and wide make their way to Reyfield to get inked by Master Kee and here it is on display. I’m so proud of my man.
With a smile on my face, I walk into the washroom and step up to the mirror. There’s a pair of dentures on the counter. I reapply my makeup and pay the dentures no mind until Nancy comes hobbling into the ladies’ room, gripping her walker tightly.
“Hey Nance, how ya doing?” I ask as I give her a hand with the door.
She wears a worried expression on her face. “Have you seen Delores, dear? Edward and I have been looking for her for nearly an hour now. She’s been having fainting spells and I hate letting her out of my sight.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” I say. “I just got here. I haven’t seen her.”
Then her eyes fall on the set of false teeth on the counter. “Any idea who those dentures belong to?”
Just as I’m about to tell her that I don’t know, the door to the handicapped stall swings open and Delores’ blinged-out mobility scooter rolls out.
Followed by the mobility scooter of some old dude I’ve never seen before.
I gasp so hard it hurts my ribs.
“Delores!” Nancy scolds her friend as the man rolls out of the room wearing the widest grin on his face.
With an equal smile, Delores drives up to counter and rinses off the dentures. “Oh those are mine,” she says matter-of-factly. “I had to take them off when my new friend and I were playing earlier.” She winks.
Ugh! Will that woman ever change?
Nancy rolls her eyes. “Delores, I’m going to have to introduce you to Edward’s friend, Roy.”
The scowl on Delores face is blatant. “Ewww Roy? He’s like 100 years old.”
“He is,” Nancy says pointedly. “And, it’s time for you to settle down. You’re too damn old to be trolling the community center for cock.”
“Oh don’t judge me,” Delores groans. “This is who I am. You can’t teach an old bitch new tricks.”
Nancy just glares.
“You’re so boring since you married Edward’s saggy balls,” Delores huffs. “Okay, okay. Introduce me to Roy. But if he has erectile dysfunction, I will not be held accountable for my actions.”
On that traumatic note, it’s time for me to get out of here. “I’ll see you ladies during the ceremony,” I say as I hurry back to the party.