chapter twenty-Six
Make it Right
Monique
I release a breath I didn’t know I was holding when Misha embraces LaSalle. LaSalle still looks pissed, but he accepts the hug. I rub my temples, wincing when my side burns.
LaSalle makes eye contact with me and his eyes turn darker with the rage swirling around him. He pulls away from Misha, heading in my direction. I stumble back from the ring and crane my neck as he moves fluidly from the ropes.
LaSalle stops in front of me and reaches for my waist, tugging my sweaty body to him. I look up into his eyes, trying to determine what he’s thinking. The energy coming off him is so potent. I feel like I can’t breathe.
“I told you to get your things, why are you here?” He says huskily. His right hand is absently, gently stroking my left side.
He smells so good. His cologne, mixed with the sweat from the exertion of kicking Misha’s ass, are intoxicating. My lashes flutter as I try to call on my good sense.
That flies out the window when LaSalle tips my head back. “You didn’t run far enough, Cara mia,” LaSalle says with a heavy Italian accent I’ve only heard him use twice before. He had an accent the first time I saw him the night he saved my life. The other time I have buried and locked away. “I don’t think I want to let you go now. Il mio amore per la vita. Do you understand?”
I lick my dry lips and nod. “Yes,” I whisper in a husky voice I don’t know for my own. “My love for life.”
I started learning Italian in college after learning more about LaSalle and his family. It was my secret thing. I happen to be quite fluent. Something tells me LaSalle already knew this.
I’ve learned that he knows a lot about me, that I’ve never told him. He has surprised me a number of times when Misha tried to test his knowledge of me. Then again, LaSalle is thorough.
“Si, Bella. I need you to think about what I’m saying to you. There is no Sam. He has not come for you. He will not come for you,” he pauses for a second and something dark flashes in his eyes. “I leave for Italy in three days. I will announce our engagement with my official promotion while I’m there. It’s time to decide if this is what you want.”
With that, he crushes my lips with his. My arms mindlessly go around his neck. I have never been so thoroughly devoured. While there is still some reluctance in his embrace, I can feel him giving into his desires.
He breaks the kiss and places his forehead to mine. “Let’s go. I need to get ice on your side,” he says, not waiting for my reply.
LaSalle lifts me in his arms, startling me. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold on. I look around to see everyone trying to look like they’re minding their own business.
I catch Val’s eye and she winks at me. I never thought I’d see the day she would give me a smile for taking on Misha. It just shows how much we are all growing in our relationships.
****
I wake to a dark room and remember LaSalle bringing me back to his home. He gave me two aspirin and sat with me until I fell asleep. We didn’t say a word to each other, though clearly there is much that needs to be said.
I think it’s time I be honest with myself. It’s obvious that others are well aware of the truth I’m hiding. I’ve yet to be in a room with Michael Donati and not feel like at any moment, he will spill my secrets and call me on the fake I am.
Misha saw right through me from the time he first met me. He may have trained me to shoot and fight, but the killer was already in me. I’ve always been capable of taking a life.
Czar has called me on my crap over and over. It’s why he stays away. He knows I want to live the lie rather than face my truth.
Ellen hit it on the head with her letter. I am Tasha. Monique is the girl my family sent to the best schools for the best education. Monique is the prim and proper girl that I forced myself to be when I met Carlton.
I had convinced myself that Monique was who I wanted to be. She was safe, she had it all planned out. She knew how to stay out of trouble and out of Czar’s business.
Monique knows how to stay away from LaSalle Locatelli. Moment of truth, Monique started dating Carlton to keep from visiting Czar in New York, in the first place. I had planned to go there and causally run into LaSalle that same summer I met Carlton.
That is until I called Czar one weekend. He answered and rushed into the phone that he would call me back. Only, Czar didn’t cut the line. I could hear roaring in the background. As Czar moved closer and closer, the voice became louder. The voice was muffled, but my heart knew who it was. It was him.
I was glued to the phone, I couldn’t pull my ear away. He yelled in half English, half Italian. It was the one other time I’d ever heard him have an accent. The power and command I heard in his voice was such a turn on.
Then his words started to sink in. I was listening to him beat someone that had stolen from his family. I sat entranced by him and his words. I knew I should’ve hung up, but I couldn’t.
Then it happened. The moment I knew something was wrong with me. I heard his voice growl out. “Fuck this, you’re better off dead.” His snarl was followed by a loud gunshot.
A normal person would have screamed. A normal person would have hung up and thought about calling the cops. Not me, I sat and listened for his voice.
“Clean this shit up,” he growled. “Czar, we’re done here. Let’s go. I’m starving.”
I smiled, I fucking smiled. My first thought was, he’s safe and the guy that took from him got what he deserved. My second thought was, what the hell, Mo. I was so sick with myself.
When Czar did call me back, I cancelled my plans to visit him in New York. I avoided Czar’s calls after that for a full two weeks, until he came home to check on me.
“What’s going on, Mo?” Czar asked.
“Do you ever feel wrong about some of the things we’ve done?” I asked him, unable to look him in the eyes.
Czar chuckled. “I feel wrong for having you with me when I did some of that shit,” he shakes his head.
“What about now, Czar? Are you living with who you are?”
Czar puts his fingers under my chin to lift my head. “Where is this coming from? You haven’t been running with the wrong crowd have you,” he narrowed his eyes at me.
“No, I stay out of trouble when you’re not around,” I teased and gave a little smirk.
“Then what’s up? Talk to me,” he said with concern in his eyes.
I shrugged, trying to think my way out of the conversation. “I don’t know. We see daddy for who he is. We see his real associates that the world doesn’t know about. I don’t think I want that.
“I want a normal life. Not to have to look over my shoulder like daddy always does,” I tried.
Czar gave me side eye at first. Then his eyes softened. He bumps me with his shoulder.
“Good luck with that one. You’re more comfortable with a gun in your hand than a book. You’re a bad girl if I’ve ever knew one. There’s only one chick that scares me as much as you,” Czar’s eyes went distant for a minute.
He shrugged away whatever he was thinking of. “There’s a reason you attracted Misha. It’s in your essence to be a bad girl. If you want to try to run from it, try, but I can tell you now…when she’s ready to come out, she’s going to come out like a volcano. You won’t be able to stop her. God help anyone in her way,” Czar shrugged.
“That’s not true, Cee.”
“Yeah, baby girl, it is,” my brother said and kissed my forehead.
So, you see. When Carlton’s fine, confident, supposed to be safe, ass walked up to me, I let Monique take over. I was never supposed to see LaSalle in that club two years later. I wouldn’t have let it happen, because deep down inside I know Tasha is living and breathing and waiting. She is like a moth to a flame where LaSalle is concerned.
I lied to Misha, I didn’t break Tasha, she is breaking me. From the inside out. She is clawing at me to get to him, LaSalle. I’m tired. I’m tired of fighting her.
~B~
Sam
I’m pacing like a bear in my office. Monique has been sleeping since I iced her side and gave her some aspirin. We haven’t talked yet.
The ride here was quiet. Neither of us saying a word. Thankfully, my parents are keeping the kids and Misha hasn’t shown up yet. I know what I said to Mo earlier. I know what I want, but I need to know what she wants.
I still have yet to understand why she never took the normal life I handed to her. If my gut is right, then I will move forward with my plan. Seeing her in the ring fighting Misha did something to me.
I was stunned at first. She’s so tiny compared to Misha and yet she stood in that ring like she belonged. I was proud of the ass whipping she was giving him at first, but when I watched him hit her, and connecting with her ribs I saw nothing but red.
I was angry with myself for not stopping it sooner. I started to when we walked in, but Thomas had held me back, which only means one thing. Thomas sees something in Mo, something he felt I too needed to see.
I saw alright and I don’t like it. So, I need answers. I need to know if what I’m about to do is right. I don’t want another wife that’s not herself with me.
I hear music coming from the living room and pause. I close my eyes. This woman and the music. She has no idea. I think of the last time we let ourselves get carried away in a song.
This time as I step out of my study, my ears are greeted by Que Sera, Sera, performed by Sly and The Family Stone. My heart squeezes in my chest when Mo comes into view. She has on one of my dress shirts.
The top few buttons are open, revealing a hint of a silver colored bra. The shirt is oversized on her, rolled to her elbows and stopping just pass her mid-thigh. She has silver strappy sandals on her feet.
I grow hard at the sight of her. She’s gorgeous. No make-up, except for a lip gloss. Her hair is like a crown around her head and she has a silver scarf tied around it.
So, young and innocent, I think looking at her face. Then, a smirk hits her lips, making the thought a lie. Those brown eyes tell a different story.
She tilts her head to the side, the motion calling my feet forward. I don’t stop until I have her in my arms. I pull her close and once again we are swaying in our bubble.
“I’ve belonged to you from the first time I heard your voice. I was just a girl, but the sound tugged my heart. It woke something in me and told me to wait for it,” she says as she looks up in my eyes.
I listen to her words and let them sink in. The night I saved her life in her family home. Before I’d ever set eyes on her.
“I shouldn’t want you,” I say closing my eyes and pressing my forehead to hers. “This is wrong.”
We dance in a circle, and I open my eyes to stare into the depths of her soul. I hold nothing back from my own eyes. I let her see me. I let her look into the eyes of the man I am. She doesn’t flinch away or shrivel.
Dare I say, it is more like she blooms in my hold and my gaze. I feel a piece of me float into place as her eyes speak back to me. I ask without words if this is what she wants and she answers me aloud.
“Says who? You asked why I did nothing with the normal life you gave me. I did nothing because that was not my life. My life, my heart is with you. If I couldn’t be with you I had no home. I know who you are, I know what I’m getting. I was built for you. I can handle you, I am your other half, because you’re mine.
“I won’t try to hide from this anymore. Whatever will be will be,” She shrugs.
I see in her eyes what I know in my heart. Her words are our truth. Nothing else needs to be said.
I cup her face and kiss her hard. Her fingers lock in my hair and I snap. I need her like I need air. I bend, reaching for her thighs and lift her to my waist. Her legs wrap around me, the seat of her hot pussy burns right through my jeans, scorching my hard cock.
I don’t break the kiss as I carry her up the hall to the bedroom we have only shared as friends. When the door shuts behind us I feel like the past is shut out with it.
My other life hasn’t entered this room with us. It’s just me and my woman. The woman my soul has wept for, while I refused to listen. The woman I hadn’t known I loved like this until I allowed my truth to be set free.
I am LaSalle.
I break the kiss and look into her eyes. “We don’t have to make love tonight. I can please you in so many ways without taking you,” I rasp.
She gives me a sly smile. “Don’t you think I’ve waited for you long enough, LaSalle,” she breathes.
I nearly roar. Hearing my name on her lips. It sounds right, finally it’s right. It’s who I’ve always been to her. I can hear it in the way she says it.
She unlocks her legs from around me and slides down my body. She moans as my shaft pokes her in the belly, unyielding. I lift a brow when she starts to push me back.
I look behind me when my legs hit the chair I hadn’t noticed as we entered the room. I look back at Mo and the fire burning in her eyes ignites me. I follow her lead for now, sitting in the chair.
I’m curious as to where she thinks this is going to go. She backs away to the side panel on the nightstand. Music fills the room. I smirk, Fall For You, by Leela James plays. I’ve heard Mo singing this song to herself in the bathtub.
I tilt my head wondering where my innocent Mo has gone. She moves to me slowly, releasing the buttons to my dress shirt she’s wearing. She’s a foot outside of my reach, when she allows the shirt to fall to the floor.
She bends at the waist, releasing the clasp on one sandal then the other. She steps out of one shoe, then the other. I smirk at how adorable she is at her natural height.
I see the first sign of nerves as she stares at me with those big brown eyes. My eyes roam all that chocolate skin. Every curve is a new journey I want to take. Her nipples are straining against the thin silver bra. Her satin and lace panties look damp in the front.
I lick my lips and lift my eyes to her face again. There isn’t a single flaw about her. She’s perfect in ways I’ve never thought anyone could be.
She lifts her chin. “Are you sure,” she says. “I will only ever give myself to you. If you’re not ready.”
“Come here,” I command. She hesitates for a moment. “Come, Tasha.”
Her eyes sharpen on mine. I smirk in understanding. This is who we are. Sam and Monique are two different people. They don’t belong here. LaSalle and Tasha have been having silent conversations for forever.
Just as we’re getting ready to. Without a word, she comes to me. I reach for the hem of my t-shirt and start to pull it over my head. Tasha helps to pull it over my head, tossing it to the floor. Her small hands caress my shoulders, as I unbuckle my belt and unzip my jeans.
Her hands slide down my chest, covering my hands when I push my pants down. I watch her face as I spring free from my boxers and pants. Her lips part, her eyes snap to mine. I reach for the back of her neck and pull her to me.
I take her lips and kiss her breathless. Tasha straddles my legs, trapping my twitching cock between us. I’m throbbing against my stomach for her. I groan as she wiggles in my lap. I palm her globes to still her.
My need to control this becomes unbearable. At once, I know where all my anger comes from. I’ve been castrated all my life. I never chose my life, it was all chosen for me. The one choice I did make was Ellen, and she snatched that choice from me.
When I break the kiss, and look into Tasha’s eyes, I see she understands this has to be my choice. I need to guide us. I kick my pants off the rest of the way.
Reaching behind her, I release her bra. Her firm breasts bounce free. I run the backs of my fingers from her collarbone over her mounds. I ghost my thumb over her hardened peak. Her chocolate nipples have my mouth watering. My lighter skin gliding across her flawless skin is the most gorgeous sight I’ve ever seen.
Goosebumps cover her skin. When I look up into her eyes, I see so much trust and love, it consumes me. I cup her breasts and lean in to capture her lips. The kiss is tender, yet passionate. It says the words we don’t have to.
Tasha and I have an understanding of our own. Her hands glide up my sides as she holds onto me. I drag my lips from hers down to her chin. Her head falls back as I continue to kiss, nip, and drag my lips down her throat to her collarbone.
I let my hands travel from her breasts, down her sides, around to her full globes, slipping into her thin panties. My long fingers connect with her wet core from behind. She shivers against me and I smirk.
I dip my head to capture one of her peaks in my mouth. My eyes flicker up to see her mouth fall open soundlessly. I slip my fingers into her wet center, stroking her from behind.
Tasha starts to ride my fingers. Neither of us rush. I want to be inside her, but I want her pleasure more. I stroke her until I feel her gush on my fingers. She’s so responsive to my touch. It’s just not enough, I take my time bringing her to the edge again and again with just my touch.
The look in her eyes is one of desire and awe. I draw my hand from her panties and caress her skin. I can’t stop touching her. I don’t want this to end.
~B~
Tasha
I never thought I’d be here. Not with this man. I always thought I wanted to wait for marriage, but I’ve just been waiting for this man.
This feels right, and the fact that we haven’t said a word, but have expressed so much between us says it all. His grey eyes hold mine as he tears my panties from my body. I blink in surprise, but smile at him.
I cup his face and caress his stubble covered cheeks with my thumbs. His hands caress my thighs, causing goosebumps to rise, once again. He leans in and nips my bottom lip.
I open my mouth and his tongue slides in. The kiss intensifies as he squeezes my thighs. I try not to take over and wiggle in his lap. I know he needs to control this.
Which he does, his lips travel to my shoulder as his hands take a firm hold of my ass. I know this is it. As he flicks his tongue against my skin. He lifts me over his erect shaft. When he bites down on my shoulder and pulls me down onto him, my back bows.
My head falls back, as I take my man for the first time. LaSalle doesn’t move and he doesn’t move me. When I lower my head to look him in the eyes, he searches my face.
Tears are leaking from my eyes, not just from the pain, but from the love I have for him. He kisses my tears away, before placing sweet kisses to my lips. When his eyes lock with mine again, he starts to guide my hips gently.
His eyes remain on mine. Speaking, but not speaking. I place my hands on his shoulders. My legs are dangling over his powerful thighs. I have no choice but to follow his every lead, as the pain is replaced with nothing but pleasure.
My juices are easing his way into my body. I’m so full, he’s not just long, but he’s stretching me to the brink. I shudder as he drags through my folds slowly.
His breath fans my face and his breathing increases. His hold on my cheeks tightens. My eyes roll. I’m going to come again and this time is going to be so much harder than any other.
I bite my lip and my head rolls back. Again, LaSalle wants none of that. His hand shoots into my hair and he brings my eyes back to his. His hips thrust up into mine. I rewrap my legs around his waist and the back of the chair as best as I can as I come staring right at him.
LaSalle abruptly lifts from the chair, with me locked in his arms. I wrap my legs around him, as he carries me to the bed. He is gentle, as he remains inside me, crawling onto the bed. He places me in the center.
His eyes search mine, once again saying so many things neither of us will dare to say in this moment. I grab the sheets when he starts to rock into me. His strong thigh shifts to wedge beneath me, as he thrusts deeper into my body. I know better than to break eye contact this time.
LaSalle pries my left hand free from the sheets, lacing our fingers together. His other hand goes to my waist. His strokes are different at this angle. More intense, if possible. I felt him deep inside my belly before, but this is different.
I lace my legs around his waist, locking them at the ankles. For the first time, sound passes between us. He groans and I whimper. His pace starts to quicken, but only slightly. His hand on my waist moves to grab the sheets by my head.
His lips are on mine in a flash. The way he sips from my mouth, you’d think he was trying to take my breath away. I give to him because he is giving to me.
I’m close again when he pulls from my heat and starts to slowly kiss his way down the center of my breast. He looks up through his lashes as he plants wet, sensual kisses against my belly. My belly quivers as his tongue peeks out and dips into my belly button.
I start to panic when he moves lower. I’m not sure I want him down there. I go to sit up, but he grasps my thighs, wrapping his strong hands around them and his mouth is on me.
My mouth opens in ecstasy. I bite my lip, trying for control as he devours me. His eyes remain locked on mine. I’m clenching the sheets again. My hips start to rock with the motion he is creating as he guides me. His tight hold on my thighs rocking me to him.
My hand flies to his hair when I soar towards my peak. I haven’t even stopped coming apart as he crawls back up my body to take my lips. I’m startled at the move. Not sure what to expect when I taste myself on his mouth.
LaSalle wraps an arm around me and slides back into me. He places sweet kisses to my temple as he drives into me with powerful thrusts. I plant my feet into the mattress and curl my toes.
It feels so good, unlike anything I’ve ever imagined. It’s only getting better with each stroke. I want to lift into him, but I don’t want to take away his control. He takes my lips again, kissing me deeply, almost as if I’ll disappear.
LaSalle breaks the kiss and puts his forehead to mine. I feel the shift in him, I know when something is wrong. I cup his face with my free hand.
“What is it,” I whisper, afraid of breaking the silent connection we’ve built.
“You’re holding back,” he shakes his head. “Never hold back from me.”
He looks down at me and I get it. I understand what he’s asking of me. He needs my trust as much as he wants to give me his. I nod my head.
~B~
Sam
I need us to be a team. Yes, I need control, but not like this. I can feel her holding back. That’s not what I want. When she nods her understanding, I roll on my back, bringing her with me.
Tasha sits up, her breasts swaying in my face. I reach for her waist. She tilts her head to the side, as she rides me to the rhythm we set together. She’s so fucking tight. I have no idea how I’ve lasted this long.
I grit my teeth, willing myself to hold on longer. I’ll never get enough of her, but the awe I feel watching her bloom in my arms is something I won’t be cheated of. I want to watch it for as long as I can hold on. Tasha starts to roll her body, as I thrust up into her and I’m so far gone.
I growl and sit up, wrapping my arms around her. I bury my face in her neck. I feel the tears trapped between her skin and mine, before I register them in my brain.
Her fingers lock in my hair and I tighten my hold as the dam breaks. When she goes to stop, I glide my hands to her ass and guide her on my shaft. My tears are not for her to stop.
My tears are because I love this woman so much. I wasted so much time running from who I am. In running from me, I’ve run from her. I hurt so many people by not owning up to the truth.
I would never say I regret my marriage. I loved Ellen, she gave me three beautiful children that I adore. She became what I needed as I tried to figure myself out.
However, now that I know who I am. I know that this is who I’ve always wanted. The woman that stole a piece of me I never thought I’d get back.
I groan into her neck. I feel her walls sucking at me. I know she’s coming again. I’m not going to last through this one. I lift my face to lock eyes with her. I want our eyes connected when I come inside her.
Her eyes tell me she knows how I feel. Her soft fingers wipe at the tears on my cheeks. I turn to pull her fingers into my mouth and suck. I taste her along with the salt of my tears in my mouth.
Her body begins to quake around mine. I lift my hips harder and faster, planting my feet into the mattress. There’s no more holding back, we’re both going over together.
I roar out my release as I pump deep inside her. It is the most intense orgasm of my life. I cup her face in both my hands.
I run my thumb across her lips as I catch my breath. I kiss her forehead. Falling back onto the bed, bringing her with me.
I wrap her in my arms and hold on tight. Tasha snuggles her face into my chest. I force my hands not to roam her body. I’ll only ignite the fire all over again.
“Tasha,” I say after I can breathe again, enough to get my words out.
“Yes,” she whispers.
“I love you.”
I smile as I feel her body sag further into mine. She will know every day how much I love her. I will make sure there is never, ever a question about that.
“I love you, too, LaSalle.”