chapter Thirty-THREE
Prodigy
Tasha
I’m pacing the jet as we head to Italy. All of the children, along with Minnie are in the cabins sleeping. The girls are looking at me, but I’m too in shock to sit and talk to them. I can feel Val’s gaze the most, so it’s no surprise that she is the first to bark at me.
“If you don’t stop that damn pacing and talk to us. What the hell is wrong with you?” she hisses at me.
I look at Marcus and lick my lips. I don’t even believe what I’m about to say. I just keep playing the shit over and over in my head.
“Marcus, you remember when I mentioned I thought Sammy might be gifted like his mom?”
“Yeah,” Marcus says with wrinkled brows.
“Well, I’m pretty damn sure about it now,” I say, and laugh out a breath.
“Wait, but I thought it ran in the women only,” Paige says in confusion.
“It does, but Ellen did mention once that she had one uncle that it was passed to. Everyone just thought he was out of his mind,” Camille says.
“Holy shit,” I breathe. “I still can’t wrap my mind around what I saw. He knew. I think he knew they were upstairs. He wouldn’t get out of the car at first. Then when he did,” I shake my head. “He pushed me out of the way in time to throw a knife in one guy’s throat.
“Wait, what the fuck has been going on around here? When did Sammy learn to throw knives?” I look over to Marcus, who blushes and looks away.
“Spill it, Mairettie,” Val narrows her eyes.
“Misha and Michael have been helping Sammy channel his energy into knife throwing and weapons handling,” Marcus mutters.
“The fuck you say? That baby is three years old. Oh, my God. Does LaSalle know about this? I’m going to kill that fucking Russian,” I spit.
“My brother knows. He okayed it. You said Sammy responds to weight and pressure. Misha started with putting his gun holster on Sammy. It was amazing. Sammy remained focused the whole time,” Marcus says in awe.
“Michael had the jacket made with the blades inside. Sammy is very proficient,” Sim says out of nowhere.
“You knew about this,” I spin on her.
“It helps the child. I don’t see what’s so wrong,” Sim says.
“You people are all un-freaking-believable,” I snarl and ball my fists.
“So, wait. Sammy throws knives,” Val says with a smirk. “And how do you know he can see shit like his mom?”
“It was crazy. He told me how many guys were coming and from which direction. When I turned, no one was there. Oh, shit, I’m not sure, but I think he can see out about five seconds ahead or something. I don’t know. He…he’s just amazing,” I shake my head.
“Oh, the things I can teach that kid. Why wasn’t I told we were training him?” Val pouts.
Marcus points to me. “Because Sam was afraid of that. He knows Mo is going to ream his ass.”
“We aren’t doing anything, Donati,” Marco speaks up groggily. He was stitched up and given some meds before we took off. “My cousin will not involve women in men’s business.”
Val and I snort. She is right beside me in a flash as we glare at Marco. We both plant our hands on our hips. I look at Val, incredulously.
“You believe this shit. I just saved his ass,” I snap, waving a hand at Marco.
“You may want to watch what you say, Locatelli. Your name doesn’t rock bells with me. I could give two. My gun goes off without discrimination,” Val hisses.
Marco throws his head back and laughs, but winces. “You do not intimidate me either, Morte Nera,” Marco says. “I don’t speak to insult you. It is just not how LaSalle was raised. He will not involve you.”
“Too late,” I mutter.
“Sì, I think so,” Marco says almost to himself.
~B~
Sam
I am barefoot, pacing the cool marble floors, in the foyer of my families’ Italy home. I’m in sweats and a t-shirt because I’ve spent the last six hours in the gym trying to calm the fuck down. It has worked only marginally.
I’m not going to be happy until I have my kids and Tasha in my arms. I wasn’t there. Once again, I wasn’t there. The level of incompetence around me is just not going to do.
This isn’t Marco’s fault. I’ve already figured out that he was called away as a distraction. Let’s just say that there are some people that will no longer be breathing soon. Loyalty is paramount to me. Knowing that someone in my organization has dared to be disloyal has my blood boiling.
I know there are those that don’t like what I’m doing, especially now that I’m Don. Things are coming to a head, but you don’t go after my family and you don’t open the door for anyone else to. Tasha’s voice, accompanied by gunshots are ringing in my head on repeat. Mixed with the images of Ellen and Tasha laying on the ground covered in blood.
I’ve just gotten to the point where I can sleep through the night without reliving that day. Now I’m wide awake, watching my wife lose her life in my head. To think, the woman I had just been planning to marry has just been under attack.
I don’t know what to do with this rage. All I can do is pace. It is going to kill me, maybe even literally, but I have to let her go. I can’t bring her into this life. The thought of more children being subject to my sins, now makes me sick.
My little Sammy was involved in this. I don’t think I will sleep tonight or any other night from here on out. Not until I make my presence known. This shit is not allowed. Not with the Alliance in place. When I get to the bottom of this, I’m going to destroy every single person involved.
“Daddy,” I hear my girls squeal, and turn to face the front door.
I squat and open my arms for them both to run to me. I hold them so tightly, kissing the tops of their little heads. I’ve never missed my family so much.
I look up to see Sammy and Tasha lingering. Sammy is clinging to her side, as Tasha watches me closely. I can see apprehension and fire in her eyes. Not the fire I hoped for yesterday, when I couldn’t wait to have my woman and family join me for a little vacation.
No, the fire I see now is anger and hurt. I release the girls and stand. There are many others entering the house, but my eyes remain locked on Tasha.
“Minnie, thank God,” my father’s voice booms through foyer as he comes out of the study. He pulls my mom into an embrace. “Let’s get you and the children settled in. I believe our son would like a moment.”
“I would like to go to the room I’ll be staying in. I’m exhausted,” Tasha says, not looking away from my eyes.
I tilt my head at her. “Why were you not in the house, where you would be safe? Did I not tell you that things were about to change? Why the hell would you put yourself in danger? Do you think I have all these men around for fun?” I snarl, not able to hold it in a moment longer.
“Who the hell are you talking to?” Tasha hisses back.
“Oh, Dear…Sam, Honey. It’s been a long flight and Monique has been through enough,” my mother tries.
“I’m talking to you. You had to have made an effort to dodge your security to get away without them knowing. Marco was gone, but you disregarded your entire team,” I growl.
Tasha storms in and stops right in front of me. “I couldn’t sleep in that house alone. I wanted the comfort of my own bed. I don’t need babysitters to watch me sleep,” she snaps back at me.
“Yes. You. Do!” I bellow. “You don’t get that they were there for you. That Marco intercepted men that knew you left my property, my protection. I can’t protect you if you’re going to blatantly ignore your safety.”
“Sam,” Bobby tries. “Let it go until the morning.”
“I’ve let enough go around here,” I snarl.
“Sam,” my mother tries again.
“No! She allowed herself and my son to be placed in harm’s way,” I swallow hard and cup Tasha’s face. “You put everything I love on the line for…for what? Because you didn’t want to be alone in the house. You were not alone. You know you’re never alone. Someone is always around. Always there to watch you and keep you safe.
“You should have called me. You should have let me know what you needed. You should have trusted me to take care of it, of you!”
“Like you trusted me when you decided to allow them to teach that baby to throw knives? You’ve been hiding that from me, why? You know what, it’s none of my business. You have no right to embarrass me like this,” Tasha says harshly and pries my fingers from her face. “I’m tired. I want to lie down.”
I bite back all the shit I want to say. I know if I say another word, things are going to get much uglier than they already are. I run a hand through my hair and nod.
In all honesty, I didn’t want to tell her about Sammy. I spoke to Marco when they arrived at Brooklyn’s warehouse. He told me everything. I’m so proud of Sammy.
We’d given him the knives for the weighted factor at first. Sim and Michael had made the suggestion. When Misha, Michael, and Sim started Sammy throwing them and small stars, we were all impressed.
“Our room is upstairs,” I say with a calm I don’t feel.
“Our room?” she scoffs. “I think it’s better if you have your room and I have mine. Misha is not around for us to have to pretend. I would hate to confuse you any further on our relationship. I think we have blurred the lines on what’s real and what’s not.”
I narrow my eyes and close the small distance between us. I dip my head so we are nose to nose. I respect the fuck out of Tasha even more, when she doesn’t so much as flinch. I can feel I’m unleashing a side of me she, nor many others in this foyer have never seen.
“Only one confused around here, at this point is you, Baby. We stopped pretending a long time ago,” I lower my voice for her ears only. “Only thing that’s going to be blurry tonight is your vision, as I remind you of who I am.
“I didn’t tell you about Sammy because I’m still processing all this shit. Those letters are messing with my head in ways you can’t even imagine. But if you want to know everything I know. Have at it, Tasha. I won’t keep another thing from you.
“But know this. Your life is more important to me than anything. I’ll do whatever I have to do to make sure you’re safe, even if it kills me,” I say.
My last words are the only words Tasha responds to. It is the first time she so much as flinches. I watch as anger disappears from her eyes and alarm fills them. She searches my face and I see the moment she gets my point. I’ll let her go before I see her harmed.
She nods when she finds what she’s looking for. “You don’t get to play with my heart, Sam,” my head snaps back at the use of that name. It sounds so wrong on her lips. “Lie to yourself, go back and forth with your own feelings, your own heart. Not mine.
“You either want me or you don’t. But I’m not going to lie in your bed and pretend I’m okay with what you are planning in your head,” she shakes her head at me. “I want my own room. You won’t be reminding me of shit. I’m not the one that needs a reminder.”
Her words hit home. I open my mouth to breathe fire and destroy the fragile thread of our relationship, but my mother and brother step in. Bobby places a hand on my shoulder and my mom wraps an arm around Tasha’s waist to lead her away from me.
Shannon, Pam, and Marie all follow in silence, with a bunch of sleepy children in tow. It dawns on me how many people just watched that whole exchange. I turn to look around me and close my eyes after taking in the faces staring back at me.
I’ve never felt like a bigger asshole. I feel my insides implode as I watch her walk away from me. Isn’t that what I want? So why do I feel like someone is tearing my soul from my chest.
Tasha stops and turns back towards me, delivering the final blow, without so much as knowing. “I’ve always known what I wanted. If you want me, then you need to figure that out. I won’t love a man that’s afraid to love me. I love myself more than that. Now it’s time for you to decide,” she says, then turns back to follow my mother’s lead.
What Tasha doesn’t know, what all the eyes and ears watching and listening don’t know, is that in the last letter I read from Ellen she warned me. Hearing those exact words from Tasha’s lips would be a sign that my time has come.
My time for what? Ellen never says. It’s left with an open end, but watching Tasha walk away from me tells me that it has everything to do with losing the woman that brings my soul peace.
I’ve tried to tell myself to stop reading those letters, but I can’t. After the one I opened a few months back that still has my head spinning, I don’t believe I should.
“You’re losing her,” Val says from beside me. “You placed her in the middle of your life and allowed her to be dependent upon that. Now you are snatching that from her. Women like us fight battles we know we can win.”
“No woman wants to fight a man with two heads,” Paige adds on.
“She’s right,” Uri adds, causing me to lift a brow. “You either love her or you let her go. I know why you are angry with her and the situation, but if you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking. You’re about to make a mistake my friend.”
“She will never be safe with me,” I say brokenly to them all.
“And that’s something she has accepted,” Uri shrugs.
“Fuck all of this,” Logan growls. “This is not you. You’ve never been pussy. So what things are about to get hot around here. It’s what we do. I need you to find your balls.”
“Fuck you,” I snap.
“He’s right,” Nate chimes in. “And from what I understand, you can’t let her go now if you wanted. So why ruin everything you have?”
“Exactly,” Bobby bites out. “You have announced your engagement. You cannot go back on that now.”
I bite back my retort because they’re right. I know this in the back of my mind. But if I could somehow set her free, I would.
“I can see what you are thinking,” Luca snorts. “She wouldn’t have any type of life if you try that shit. You’re more than the head of your family. Your declaration went out across the globe. Not only is she now yours, she has a target on her back regardless.
“You have to honor this. You don’t have a place in the world you could hide her. I’m just going to say it. What happened with Ellen was fucked up.
“I feel for you, but you still have a whole lot of shit you need to face in this life. Somehow, Mo has gotten caught up in that web. You built this all on your word, you can’t go back on it,” Luca finishes.
“Bottom line,” Logan says. “Get your shit together. You’re marrying her whether you like it or not. It’s clear you care about her. Fix your shit, Lad.”
~B~
Tasha
I was pissed at LaSalle when I arrived. I was mad that he hung up on me and I was upset about him not mentioning Sammy learning to throw knives. However, none of that can compare to how pissed off I am now.
I gave myself to him. I told him he would be the only one for me. Yet, I saw it in his eyes. He’s willing to let me go. I don’t think my heart has ever ached this much.
To go from missing the man you love, to wanting to stab him with one of his son’s knives, within just hours. I have gotten in way over my head. LaSalle asked for my trust, but I don’t have his. That hurts. If he trusted me, he would know I would never intentionally do anything to hurt these children or him.
A tap at the door grabs my attention. It’s been a few hours since we arrived, but I haven’t been able to fall asleep. I slip from sitting on the bed and tiptoe to the door. I listen for a few moments, I can hear shifting on the other side of the door.
I move back a little, as something is pushed underneath the door. I look down to see those all too familiar envelopes. I bend to retrieve them and look them over. There all addressed to Sam.
I move back over to the bed and start with the one that was placed on the top. I get the feeling they were placed in the order I’m meant to read them. I unfold the letter and take a deep breath.
Dear Sam,
Sammy will be turning three soon. It is time you know some things about our son. He is going to be very special. He has a special gift. One that will surpass mine and my grandmother’s.
It is so rare for males in my family to have it and many times they lose their mind from it. That will not be the case with our son. I don’t know why or how, maybe it is because of his autism, but Sammy will handle his gift with a grace and wisdom beyond us all.
You will see him become tighter with his siblings. It’s because Jessica will anchor his gift in some way. It’s so frustrating. I can’t really see much about the girls and whether they will be gifted. I get these tiny glimpses of our girls that are not enough to make out much.
However, I can tell you this. Sammy will need an outlet. Our friends will come to you with an idea that won’t sit well with you. It will be to help Sammy. It won’t make sense at first. It’s something you as a father would never want to do.
Don’t ignore their suggestion. It is a part of who Sammy is. It will help him in ways you can’t even imagine. It will also help you. I can’t see exactly what it is. All I can see now is metal. Metal is always around him. It will make sense to you when the time comes.
Don’t hesitate when the time arrives, because it is imperative that he does this. I, God, none of this is making sense to me, but I see the Donati’s, with a heavy hand in our son’s future. Even in his adult life.
I once thought I understood why, but this is more. Something else happens way before that other vision will come to fruition. Oh, Sam, our son will have such a fulfilling life. His Mo-mo will make sure of it.
-Love,
Ellen
I sit stunned. I don’t know how to react, or how to feel. I lose some of my ire. I’m trying my best to see this from LaSalle’s side. Like I said, he doesn’t owe me anything when it comes to his children.
Reading this one letter, I can see how he must live in torment. It’s like he can’t move on without his past having a hand in it all. That must be hard on him.
Exhaustion sets in hard. I sit the rest of the letters on the nightstand. I don’t think I can handle reading another tonight. Sleep, I need sleep and then I can see things clearly.