Alec didn’t keep Jensen up until 3:00 a.m. They fell asleep in each other’s arms closer to midnight. It was the best night of sex Jensen had known in the three years since he moved next door to Alec. He quietly cursed himself that he’d not gone next door any earlier, but late was always better than never.

As he nestled his face into Alec’s neck in the moments before sleep, Jensen inhaled deeply. He wanted to take in everything about Alec. He wanted to enjoy it all before it drifted out of reach, and it was too late. Experience told him that even the best and hottest connections were fleeting. Jensen’s personal record was six weeks, and that was back in college when staying in a broken relationship somehow sounded safer than being single again.

Alec fell asleep first. Jensen heard the light snoring and smiled. Five minutes later he slipped into a deep, relaxed sleep, too.

It was such a deep sleep that Jensen thought he’d been dozing only five minutes when he heard a yell. At first he thought Alec’s shout was part of a dream, but the hand on his shoulder pulled him into wakefulness.

Alec sat bolt upright in bed tugging at Jensen’s shoulder. In a loud whisper, he said, “Wake up! Please, fuck, wake up!”

“Alec?” Jensen rubbed his eyes. The night before rushed back into memory as he asked, “Alec, what time is it?”

“I didn’t do it! It wasn’t my fault. You believe me, don’t you? It wasn’t my fault.” Alec lowered his head into his hands.

Jensen pushed himself up to sitting and placed a hand on Alec’s shoulder. He assumed Alec was still suffering from grief over the death of his mother. It was not a surprise. Grief over major life events came in waves, and they were unpredictable. He knew plenty of situations where people falsely blamed themselves for someone else’s death.

Jensen said, “No, it’s a bad dream. You didn’t do anything. It’s not your fault.”

Alec shuddered. His eyes glazed over. He was somewhere else. He said, “They blamed me, but it wasn’t my fault.”

Jensen wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. He started trying to piece together all the training he’d had about dealing with grief while he reached out for Alec and tried pulling him closer.

Alec didn’t resist the firm hug. His body started to shake and suddenly his voice returned to a normal tone. “Fuck, what the hell’s going on?”

“I think you had a bad dream. It sounded like a nightmare. You’re okay now. It happens. The waves come and go, but you’re fine.”

Alec held on tightly. “Shit, that was scary. It’s all drifting away already, but fuck, I couldn’t wake up. I was stuck. It’s like my head was held in a vise or something, and I couldn’t wake up.”

Jensen wrapped his body even tighter. He knew that grief came in waves, and they came at any time. They could be triggered by anything. Maybe even a great night of sex could be a trigger. He asked, “Can you go back to sleep, or do we need to get up for a while?”

Alec shook his head. “No, I can sleep, but you don’t think I’m fucked up, do you? I mean, I know I’m a hellish mess in a lot of ways, but this was just a dream. It happens. Everybody has bad dreams, right?”

“That’s right. Everybody does. It’s not your fault.” Jensen glanced around the room. He saw the posters in dark shadows on the opposite wall. The black shadows of bare trees danced against the window in the light of a street lamp.

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I thought it was over. I guess it’s not completely over. I thought it might be. Every time I go for a long time without thinking about it, I think it’s over. Please don’t get pissed at me. It will go away. I just need a little more time.”

Even in the wee hours of the morning, Jensen felt drawn to Alec’s ability to show his vulnerability. Jensen didn’t feel it pushing him away. He felt it drawing them closer. He kneaded Alec’s shoulder and asked, “Should we lay back down now? It’s just after 3:00.”

“Oh, yeah. Like I said, it’s not the first time I’ve had a bad dream. We all do. Thank God this one wasn’t about my mom. I had a dream that she was lying in a coffin. It was so fucking scary and weird, because we had her cremated. There was no open casket. Nobody wanted to come to a funeral for her anyway. My aunt, uncle, and I took care of it all nice and quiet, but there she was in a dream in a big fucking coffin.”

Jensen felt Alec’s body shudder against him. He was confused. Alec implied the dream wasn’t about his mom. Who was it about? He considered asking that question, but 3:00 a.m. was not the time of day to sort out the details of a nightmare.

Jensen said, “Our mind’s can do some crazy things when we have to sort something out.” He started to slide down into the bed again and gently pulled Alec along.

“Did I say I’m glad you’re here? If you weren’t, I’d climb out of bed and go downstairs to make coffee and spend at least an hour up in the middle of the night, but I think I can go back to sleep if you hold on.”

Jensen reached out for Alec’s chin. “How about a kiss first? That will help me go back to sleep.”

“You might take a piss, too, as long as you’re awake. I’m just sayin’. I think I’ll do that, too.”

It was an opportunity for a new experience. Jensen couldn’t remember ever making out buck naked in the bathroom at 3:30 a.m. They both looked disheveled as hell, but it didn’t matter. Jensen backed Alec up against the lavatory and kissed him hard. One thing led to another and soon they were in the shower together with warm water raining down over their heads.

Jensen explored every inch of Alec’s body with soapy hands. He pushed Alec up against the wall of the shower and gently rubbed his long cock against Alec’s tight, round ass cheeks.

Alec whispered, “If this is what happens when I have bad dreams, maybe I should have one every night.”

Jensen wrapped his arms around Alec’s body and whispered, “Let’s go back to bed.”

It felt like they were barely asleep an hour when Jensen heard the pinball ring of a phone call coming in on his cell phone. Alec groaned, “Who’s calling you at 6:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning?”

Jensen rolled over and grabbed the phone. He wanted to shut the call down, but then he saw it was from Les. He couldn’t think of any reason that Les would call him so early on a Saturday morning other than trouble.

Blinking his eyes, Jensen answered, “Hello? Les?”

The voice from the other end said, “This isn’t Les. This is his sister Abby. I’m calling on his phone. I didn’t want to wake you up so late last night. There’s been an accident. Les is in the hospital.”

“What? Oh, my God? What the fuck? An accident?” Jensen was suddenly wide awake blinking his eyes and trying to comprehend Abby’s words.

“Yes, and they think he’ll pull through, but it’s bad. He spent the last four hours in surgery. I don’t think you’ve ever met me, but we looked at the text messages on his phone. They recovered it at the scene of the accident. It was obvious that you were someone we needed to call.”

“Yeah, he’s my best friend. Thank you.”

Abby shared the details about the hospital where they took Les, and Jensen told her he was on his way. He ended the call saying, “If he wakes up before I get there, tell him that I’m on my way. He’s tough. He has to be okay.”

As Jensen hung up the call, Alec reached out for him, but he was already climbing out of bed. Alec asked, “What the fuck? It sounds like something bad. What’s going on?”

Jensen tugged his jeans on as he said, “My best friend Les. He’s been in an accident. I’ve got to go. I’m sorry. We’ll talk soon. I’ve got to go. I hate doing this. You understand, right?”

Alec stood up and skirted the foot of the bed. “Damn, that sucks.”

Jensen held his hands out. “I’m sorry. I can’t. She said it’s bad. Fuck! I’ve really got to go.”

The last thing Jensen heard from Alec before he clattered his way down the stairs was, “I’m so fuckin’ sorry. The world bites. I can drive you.”

Jensen was too focused on his buddy Les to answer. He slammed the front door behind him. He rummaged in his pocket for his car keys. They were on the same ring as his house keys. He bolted for the car and climbed inside. He knew that tears were close to the surface, but he needed to fight them back so that he could see to drive.

As Jensen drove across the city, the roads were nearly empty so early on a Saturday morning. It started to rain, and Jensen thought it was the perfect metaphor. Les was a good man. He was better than most. Those who knew him well loved him. He’d never hurt anyone else, and now he was in the hospital fighting for his life. It made sense for the heavens to shed tears.

As he pulled into the hospital parking lot, Jensen whispered, “Please, God, if you’re there, I know I never pray. I never give you a second thought, but this once, just this once, be merciful to my friend.”