2
“You cannot go on a date like that,” Rita said, staring in obvious disgust at Nolan’s outfit.
“He said t-shirt and jeans,” Nolan complained.
“Do you wanna get laid by the beautiful blond marble statue of a man with the kind eyes you just described to me, or not?” she asked.
Nolan shrugged. “Not really? He’s being paid to be there. I don’t wanna deal with Gavin’s smug satisfaction when he figures out that I do actually like the guy. And it’s not that kind of date.”
Rita sighed. “You can’t go on a date with another adult in a Pokémon t-shirt. You just can’t.”
“Why not?” Nolan asked. “What’s so wrong with me that being myself makes me completely unlikeable?”
For a handful of seconds, Rita was silent. “Dammit,” she said. “I’m doing exactly what Gavin does, aren’t I?”
“Maybe a little?” Nolan winced at having to admit it. Rita was his sister, and she meant well, but…
Everyone seemed to want Nolan to be different than he was. To be cooler, or to do things differently, or… any one of a million things.
They meant well. They all meant well, he was fairly sure. It was just that Nolan couldn’t see why he should have to change to be loved. Surely if someone was going to love him, they’d love him for who he was?
Otherwise they’d eventually figure out that they’d fallen for a lie. And Nolan wasn’t a good enough liar to manage that in the first place. He’d always be a huge dork who liked stupid things, and he’d just have to find someone who was into that.
And gay.
And available.
Which shouldn’t have been literally impossible. Should it?
“I’m sorry. You’re right, there’s nothing wrong with you,” Rita said.
“Well. The evidence kinda suggests there is, so…”
Rita made a soft, sympathetic noise. “You’ll find someone. It might take a while, but you will. There’s someone out there for everyone.”
“Maybe you’re right about the shirt,” Nolan said, tugging at the hem. It probably wouldn’t help his first impression with Finn, and while he wasn’t expecting this to go anywhere at all, it’d still be good practice for actual dates further along the line.
A little like dressing for the job you wanted.
He sighed, pulling it off and picking out a plain black one he usually used as a layer under his sweaters in the winter, or to sleep in. It’d shrunk in the wash.
“Much better,” Rita said. “While you’re changing, those jeans…”
“What’s wrong with the jeans?”
“You don’t have a pair a little more… fitted?” she asked.
“I dunno?” Nolan shrugged. “You seem to know my wardrobe better than me.”
Rita stood from where she’d been perched on the edge of the bed, pulling open drawers and rifling through them until she found what she was looking for. It was just as well Nolan didn’t keep anything embarrassing in his room.
Well, not in his drawers, anyway. The old shoebox stashed under the bed was a different story, but Rita didn’t know about that.
No one knew about that.
“These,” Rita said, holding out a pair of jeans Nolan had forgotten he even had.
“They’re too small. That’s why they’re hiding in the back of a drawer,” he said. They were an online purchase he’d never gotten around to returning.
Which was because they weren’t really too small, but they were too tight for his confidence levels. He wasn’t the kind of person who wore jeans that looked like they’d been sprayed on.
“Try them,” Rita said. “I’ll be in the living room.”
She left the jeans on the bed and ducked out of the room, leaving Nolan alone to contemplate them.
It was already three-thirty. If he left this any longer, he’d be late, and he didn’t want to be late. Finn would probably care a lot more about that than what he was wearing.
On the other hand, maybe Rita was right. She had men hanging off her all the time. Maybe it was okay to just, for once, not be himself, and see where it got him.
Besides, it wasn’t like this was a real date. Even if it went horribly wrong or he hated it, he was never going to see Finn again anyway.
There was no risk here.
So he might as well try something different, right? Since what he was doing now really wasn’t working for him.
Decision made, Nolan kicked off the jeans he was wearing and, with only a little difficulty, shimmied into the ones Rita had picked out for him.
In the mirror, he didn’t look anything like himself.
Good. He could be someone else for the afternoon. Someone who went on dates with gorgeous veterinarians with exciting lives and pretty smiles.
Someone who wasn’t him.
“Much better,” Rita said as he walked out of the bedroom, heading for the well-worn sneakers he left by the door. Those, Rita hadn’t objected to. Maybe they were cool enough.
“Yeah?” Nolan asked, still a little unsure. He wasn’t used to dressing to impress anyone.
Some part of him would have liked to impress Finn, though. Finn had been nice. And handsome.
Nice, handsome men didn’t normally want to hang out with Nolan at all. And while he knew that Finn had been nice at least partly because he was getting a donation out of this, he also wanted to believe Finn was just nice. Maybe even nice to him, because he wasn’t completely repulsive all the time.
“Definitely. You’re gonna have him wrapped around your little finger, just you wait,” she said, which was encouraging.
Nolan wasn’t sure it was true, but it was still nice to hear.
“So do I have your permission to go? Because at this rate I’m gonna be late.”
“Go,” Rita said. “Have a great time. Make the most of this.”
“Because it’s never gonna happen again?” Nolan asked wryly.
He would have been mad that everyone was convinced he couldn’t get a date if not for the fact that all available evidence suggested that he really couldn’t. Not that he’d been trying all that hard. Work was way easier than romance, and he hadn’t been comfortable being out to the world until after college, and he’d just… never quite found the time.
Which meant now he had no idea what he was doing. The longer he’d put it off, the scarier it seemed.
Maybe Gavin was actually doing him a favor, here. Not on purpose. Nolan knew he’d done this to embarrass him, but it didn’t have to be that way. This could be a nice afternoon with an attractive man. It could be fun.
“Don’t say that.” Rita reached out to brush some fluff off Nolan’s shoulder. “You just need a little confidence boost. Maybe this can be that.”
“Maybe,” Nolan agreed. He wasn’t entirely convinced, but he would have liked to think this was the start of finally putting himself out there. “Wish me luck?”
“You don’t need it,” Rita said. “You’re a catch. Now go. You don’t wanna keep your hot vet waiting.”