6
Nolan was an idiot.
That was the only explanation for the conversation he’d had with Gavin before he’d come here.
When Gavin asked him how his date went in that smug, patronizing tone, he’d panicked. And he’d wanted, for once in his life, to come out ahead.
But when the words it was great and I’m seeing him again tonight had escaped him, Nolan knew instantly that he’d made a mistake.
Gavin didn’t just drop things. That wasn’t how their relationship had ever worked.
He’d demanded proof.
Great! You can bring him to the company Halloween party.
Which was next week, because that got it out of the way, or something. Who had a Halloween party in mid-October? Who had a company Halloween party?
Every other year, Nolan had avoided it by scheduling a full server update that had kept him cooped up alone in the server room, which was much better than having to go and socialize with people.
This year, Gavin had managed to catch him off-guard.
And now he’d have to find a way to excuse Finn’s absence without giving away that he’d lied in the first place. Gavin would make his life miserable if he ever found out.
And even if he didn’t, he’d already managed to ruin the joy of volunteering at the sanctuary for him, because now he’d be uncomfortable around Finn.
What had he ever done to Gavin to deserve this?
Seeing Finn waving at him from the porch as he pulled his car up only served to make Nolan feel worse. Finn had been nothing but kind to him.
Was it too much to ask to want to make a friend?
Probably, considering Nolan’s life so far.
“Ready to learn the ropes?” Finn asked, beaming broadly.
“Ready as I’ll ever be.” Nolan forced himself to smile back, tugging on the hem of his t-shirt as he stood in front of Finn on the porch. He was wearing the same too-small one again, since Rita hadn’t given him any other advice and his wardrobe was limited if nerdy t-shirts were a no-go.
“Most of this is just boring common sense stuff we have to do for insurance purposes, and I need you to sign a waiver to say that if, like, Buttercup does eat you, you won’t sue. But nothing worse than a bite or a scratch has ever happened to anyone here, and I’m pretty good with antiseptic and bandaids.”
“Since you’re practically a doctor,” Nolan said, relaxing the tiniest fraction.
This place was good for him. He didn’t want to lose that because Gavin was an asshole.
“Well, in the event of an apocalypse I guess I’m better than nothing.” Finn shrugged. “So if the zombies come, you definitely wanna stick close.”
Nolan rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help smiling at that.
Which, as he followed Finn inside to sign papers that said he wouldn’t hold the sanctuary responsible if he got eaten or otherwise injured, made it all the worse. He liked Finn. Finn was the kind of person he could have been friends with.
If Gavin hadn’t totally sabotaged him from the first minute. And if he wasn’t an idiot who lied about dating the guy to save face.
There was no way in a million years Finn would actually be interested in him—even if he did somehow convince him that he was cooler than he was, eventually, Finn would see through it. And then he wouldn’t be interested anymore. He’d probably be mad.
Nolan wasn’t sure how his whole life had ended up full of lies in the space of a week, but he suspected it was mostly his fault.
All he’d wanted was a little happiness.
Clearly, that really was too much to ask.
Papers signed, he followed Finn on the same tour he’d gotten last Friday, but with more in-depth explanations of what everything was for and which things he should avoid touching. Half of his brain listened while the other half tried to come up with a way to convince Gavin that he really was dating Finn, but he genuinely couldn’t make it.
Without sounding like a high schooler claiming that they really did have a boyfriend, but he went to a different school. Which was difficult, because that was almost exactly what he’d done.
“You might wanna consider investing in steel-toed boots if you’re gonna come by a lot,” Finn said.
Nolan hummed in response, still only half-listening.
“Dude, I know this is boring, but I don’t think you’ve listened to a word I’ve been saying.” Finn stopped in front of him so suddenly that Nolan nearly ran straight into his chest.
Dammit.
Now Finn thought he was ignoring him. He looked hurt.
This day was doomed to just keep getting worse.
“I’m sorry. I’m not ignoring you because I’m bored,” Nolan said, his stomach tied up in knots over the thought that he’d hurt Finn. “I’m just not here.”
“Work stress?” Finn asked, sympathetic.
Nolan snorted, not surprised that Finn’s impression of him was that he was a jittery workaholic. “For once in my life, no. No, I…”
He should admit to what he’d done. At least then, Finn would know.
Maybe he’d even agree to tell Gavin they really had been on a date if they ever ran into each other again. It was the best he could hope for.
On the other hand, what if he was mad? Nolan wasn’t sure he could handle that.
I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend didn’t seem like the kind of thing that’d go down well.
“I’m listening,” Finn said, his voice soft and warm and gentle, like he was soothing an injured animal. Which, come to think, he was probably good at.
“This is so stupid.” Nolan sighed, leaning back against a table in the reptile shed. “Gavin was giving me crap about you, asking how our date went, and whether I was gonna see you again, and I… please don’t be mad?”
“I’m not gonna be mad,” Finn promised.
“I told him it went great and I was seeing you again,” Nolan said. “And then he gave me this smug little smirk and said great, then you can bring him to the Halloween party and firstly, who has a Halloween party almost a full week before Halloween, and secondly, he was just saying it to catch me out and now I’m gonna look like an idiot. And you’re gonna hate me for lying about it.”
To Nolan’s surprise, Finn chuckled.
He wasn’t yelling, or telling him off, or looking at him in disgust. Just laughing quietly.
“Well, I’m flattered,” Finn said. “No one’s ever pretended to date me before.”
“You’re not mad?” Nolan asked, despite the fact that Finn had just said he wasn’t. He’d been worrying about it on the whole drive over. A little more reassurance was necessary.
“Clearly not. So when’s this Halloween party?” he asked.
“The Friday before—wait, why?” Nolan looked up at him.
Finn shrugged. “Gotta know when I need a costume by. This is a costume thing, right?”
Nolan blinked at him.
Was Finn offering to go with him?
No. No, there was no way he’d gotten that lucky. Why the hell would Finn want…?
“Okay, here’s the thing—your cousin is an asshole, and I don’t like him. He dragged me into trying to humiliate you at that auction. As much as I’d love not to be petty about it, I am petty, so… the chance to see the look on his face when we do show up together? I’d do a lot for that.”
“Oh.” Nolan swallowed, hoping he didn’t seem too disappointed by Finn’s reasons.
It wasn’t as though he really expected Finn to want to go with him. At best, he’d expected to be forgiven for lying about it and allowed to keep coming back to the sanctuary.
“Sorry.” Finn shrugged. “I’m not gonna pretend to like the guy. I know he’s your cousin.”
“No, uh… my relationship with Gavin is, umm, complicated.”
Complicated was understating it a little, but it was the best description Nolan could come up with short of telling Finn his entire life story.
“I kinda figured.” Finn nodded. “And I’m not gonna tell you how to run your life, obviously. But if you’re okay with me tagging along… I mean, how bad can it be?”
“Well, there’s an open bar.” Nolan shrugged. “I don’t really drink, so I’m not sure how much of an enticement that is.”
“I don’t really drink either,” Finn said. “But I will have one hard apple cider on your cousin’s dime. If you’re cool with that.”
How could he say no? Finn was giving him the opportunity to turn the tables on Gavin for once in his life.
That was too good an offer to pass up.
“We wouldn’t have to stay long,” he said. “Just long enough for him to see you there.”
“Hey, I already said I’d go,” Finn responded kindly. “You don’t need to sell me on this. It was my idea.”
“I know, I just… you’re doing it to save me being humiliated all over again and I really appreciate that. You don’t owe me anything.”
“I don’t have to owe you anything to want to help out a friend in need,” Finn said.
“Friend?” Nolan asked hopefully.
“Yeah. I mean, assuming you wanna be friends.” Finn shrugged again, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.
Was he nervous? About Nolan potentially not wanting to be his friend?
Wow.
Fear of rejection obviously wasn’t limited to people who were used to being rejected. Nolan couldn’t imagine anyone saying no to Finn. A smile and a wink would have gotten him anything.
“I’d like to call you a friend,” Nolan said after a moment, realizing that Finn was expecting an answer.
“Good. Back to the safety briefing?”
The multiple knots in Nolan’s stomach all seemed to unravel at once. Things were okay.
Finn was smiling at him.
Gavin was going to be pissed.
And he’d made a new friend.
The relief was enough to leave him lightheaded. He blinked up at Finn for a moment, and then managed to nod.
“I’ll even listen this time,” he promised.
“Yeah, well, it’s your ass on the line if you don’t,” Finn joked. “You already signed the paperwork.”
“I’m sure Buttercup won’t eat me. We’re friends.”
“You are. Look at her looking over at you.” Finn nodded to her tank, where she was pointed in Nolan’s general direction.
“Do snakes see like that? Can she recognize me?”
“Uh, no and yes,” Finn said. “Snakes have pretty terrible eyesight in human terms. What she’s seeing is a you-shaped warm patch. If she recognizes you, it’s kind of… by taste? Or smell, I guess. They’re pretty closely connected in snakes. I think. I’m not an expert or anything.”
“Taste?” Nolan raised an eyebrow.
“They taste the air. Or so I’ve read. Between you and me? Not a huge snake fan. I’m used to her now, but…”
“Really?” Nolan asked, surprised. It was hard to imagine Finn being afraid of anything.
“Really,” Finn said. “You want fearless, you’ll have to get to know Oscar. I like small mammals. Small mammals are nice and easy to handle. Everything else is… harder.”
“What about birds?” Nolan was curious now. He’d assumed that Finn just… loved all creatures great and small.
“Basically lizards with wings. But Ezra won me over. He’ll be here next time you come around, assuming we’re skipping next week’s session in favor of going to this party.”
“Right, yeah.” Nolan nodded. He’d calmed down so much after Finn said he’d go with him that he’d almost forgotten he still actually had to go.
“I was thinking of taking half-days on Fridays, actually, so I can come here and make myself useful. I’ve earned it. I work a ton of unpaid overtime as it is.”
“Coming in on Fridays would take a load of pressure off us,” Finn said. “I don’t normally do weekends. Oscar and Ryan are here, but… it shouldn’t fall to them to handle everything I couldn’t get done. You’d be a huge help.”
Nolan beamed, thrilled that he’d stumbled on a way to be useful. And that the way Finn was talking, he’d mostly be helping him out.
“Perfect,” Nolan said. “Then I’m finishing up before my lunch break and I should be here around two-thirty on Fridays.”
Finn grinned at him. “Glad I haven’t scared you off by telling you about how dangerous this could all potentially be. Even if you only heard half of it.”
Nolan shrugged. “I like to live on the edge.”
Which wasn’t even remotely true, but he would have liked it to be true. He would have liked more chances to do bigger and better things.
“My kinda guy,” Finn said.
Another one of those swarms of butterflies erupted in the pit of Nolan’s stomach.
“So do you think a couples’ costume would be too much?” Finn continued, stepping back and walking ahead, presumably to start up the safety briefing again.
“Maybe a little? We’ve only known each other a week. And I’m not much of a costume guy. I was planning on taking the laziest possible route.”
“Yeah, me neither. I’m just thinking about how to squeeze the most revenge out of this.”
Nolan chuckled. Finn’s idea of revenge was harmless, and he couldn’t help but think some part of it was on his behalf. That Finn had been upset about being involved in Gavin’s attempt to embarrass him, but that he was also upset that Nolan had been embarrassed.
He seemed like the kind of caring, empathetic man who’d feel like that. Maybe.
Maybe Nolan was just giving him all kinds of good qualities in his head because he was hot and being nice to him. Wouldn’t have been the first time.
Finn seemed different, though. There was something wholesome and genuine about him.
“I’m willing to entertain any costume suggestions you have, but I reserve the right to veto them.”
“Obviously,” Finn said. “I’m trying to make Gavin uncomfortable, not you. We’re friends now. No take-backs.”
Nolan laughed at Finn’s phrasing, but something in his chest clenched at the thought. Finn wanted to be his friend. He hadn’t been made to feel like an obligation or a hanger-on at all.
Before now, Nolan couldn’t remember ever feeling like someone actually wanted to spend time with him. He’d always just been tagging along.
This Halloween party might end up being fun after all.