Chapter Twenty-One

~Text exchange. Grade Eleven science class, Heart Falls High School~

Ginny: Tiffany said Marisa told her Brant said Tyson told Mike he liked me

Dare: well, that was a waste of words

Ginny: why?

Dare: d’uh. You can tell Tyson likes you because he’s always watching you

Ginny: omg, really?

Dare: you’re as observant as a brick wall

Ginny: shut up. Go back to where you said he likes me and tell me more…

 

 

Dare had made a shocking discovery, and she wasn’t quite sure what to do with it.

During the wonderful chaos that was time with the invading horde of Colemans, she’d slowly come to a few conclusions.

She liked these people. Jesse had returned to being the stand-up guy she’d known in Heart Falls. Quick to laugh or make a joke except when—

Well, Dare wasn’t blind. It was clear the only time he morphed back into awkwardness or being inconsiderate was when Vicki was there. He’d drift around the room, talking with his parents, joking with his brothers, all comfortable and steady until he turned and came face to face with her.

It was also clear that while Vicki wasn’t one hundred percent comfortable with him, her unease was a whole different type. More like secondhand discomfort. She felt awkward because of the way he acted.

Any fool could see that Vicki and Joel were wildly, totally and completely in love. There was no faking their level of connection. The little glances, the touches. They probably weren’t even aware of them most of the time, until they were. Joel pressed a hand over Vicki’s hip, and she looked up and offered a smile that made Joel’s eyes flash—Dare had to look away, it was too private a moment to intrude upon.

Which is why she found herself pondering the things that she knew, and dropping them into a logical order.

A) Jesse had left his family suddenly last February

B) he got the black eye from Rafe regarding some issue with “a woman”

and C) the only woman Jesse was mixed up and confused around was Vicki.

The logical conclusion was he had left to avoid being around her.

Only Dare also knew that Jesse wasn’t faking it when it came to enjoying the time he spent with her. The sweet kisses and caring gestures were real. She had no illusions that he was in love, but he did care for her and Buckaroo.

Ergo…

Jesse had been in love with Vicki when he left last winter.

Maybe she was taking a bit of a leap, but it made sense, and it put her on a strange teeter-totter. After Jesse had admitted that he’d taken off without a word, she’d understood better Blake’s reaction—if one of her brothers had up and left on a whim without warning, when he came back for a visit Caleb would’ve tied the offender behind a tractor and used them to dig furrows.

But if Jesse had left so he didn’t come between his brother and Vicki—

Back to Dare’s dilemma. What did she do with this suspicion?

If they were returning to Heart Falls in a day or two, it would be different. But that afternoon she’d got an email from Ginny that had sent her thoughts spiraling.

 

Hey Dare,

Wanted to talk to you about this when we stopped in, but Caleb never gave us two seconds alone.

It sounds as if Buckaroo and you are going to be fine. I’ve got all my fingers and toes crossed for one hundred percent positive news soon. That said—have you thought about moving to Rocky?

I know, weird comment, and I’m not coveting your cottage or anything. Thing is, I’ve got a line on a really great opportunity. Yes, this is the secret I never got to tell you about. There’s a CSA association that does worldwide apprenticeships. One year of travelling to organic community gardens in France, Germany—heck there’s one in Thailand and a couple in South America. I didn’t say anything when I applied because I figured it was a long shot, but I got word the other day that I’ve made the short list. I am so freaking excited.

Only trouble is, Caleb needs someone around to help with the girls. He’s gotten pretty used to having you and me, but it’s time for him to get a full-time nanny. I thought maybe if he realizes you won’t be back permanently that might light a fire under his ass and he’ll stop defaulting to us. I haven’t told him yet about me going away because I wanted to tell you first.

You can work anywhere—you’ve said that a million times. You said Jesse’s got work with the Colemans again. Just wanted to put the thought out there. I’ll support you whatever you decide.

I should know within the next couple weeks if I got one of the positions. If I do, I’m on the road as of September 1. And…I’ve already decided if I don’t get the position I’m going to travel anyway. Which means whether you’re here or you’re there, I’m going to miss you like hell, but it’s time for me to do the next thing.

This is all probably a bit of a shock, and I’m sorry. I hope you know I love you with everything in me, and I don’t want you to feel as if I’ve abandoned you. But you’ve got someone who cares about you. You’ve got a baby on the way. Between Jesse and Buckaroo, our world is going to change shortly, anyway.

I don’t know, maybe this is me taking my step out into the big world in the hopes that I can find someone to be with and raise a family with. And yes, have a great big adventure in the meantime.

Still love me?

Ginny

 

The world was changing. Dare was excited for Ginny to have a neat opportunity, but should she stay in Rocky? It wasn’t something she could decide in an instant, not with the flow of humanity through her hospital room.

Jesse stopped beside the bed, stretching an arm across the mattress to put himself directly in front of her. “That’s a pretty neat trick. You look too damn serene for the level of chaos in here.”

She examined his face, trying to read him. “The ability to daydream anywhere is both a gift and a curse.”

He brushed his knuckles over her cheek then stepped back, barely covering a yawn.

“It’s nearly eight. Why don’t you head out with the rest of your family?” Dare suggested. “I’ll probably hit the sack early. You can catch a couple of hours’ sleep before you go back to work.”

He nodded. “I might do that.”

She glanced over and saw Marion examining them, face folded into a frown before she marched over to Blake and spoke firmly.

Jesse chuckled, and she turned her attention back to him. “What?”

“Sometimes your face is very expressive. Yes, my mother scares the living daylights out of me as well.”

“She can be very intense,” Dare agreed with a whisper. “I like her, don’t get me wrong, but I wouldn’t like to get on her bad side.”

“You’re carrying one of her grandbabies. You could commit murder and she’d go to bat for you.”

Dare offered him an evil grin. “Good to know. Now, make sure you don’t do anything that makes me want to murder you.”

He snorted. “Too late. I seem to have that effect on just about everyone eventually.”

Across the room what was a low conversation grew in volume, and Jesse and Dare’s attention fell on Marion who had pulled Mike into the argument.

“But it’s not right,” Marion insisted. “Mike, you tell him.”

Mr. Coleman shifted his feet, but he looked serious as he shook his head. “This isn’t up to me, Marion. I gave control of the schedule to Blake, and I stand by his decision. I trust him, and you need to do the same.”

“But Jesse is a part of this family too.” Her volume rose again, indignation in her tone.

“Jesus Christ,” Jesse muttered under his breath, squeezing Dare’s hand before giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. “I need to do some damage control. I’ll see you in the morning?”

“I’ll be here.”

“I never thought I’d see the day when one of my sons would—”

“Is there a problem?” Jesse interrupted as he slid into position next to his mother.

Marion put an arm around him. “I just heard that Blake has you working all sorts of terrible shifts. He can’t do that. I want him to treat you better.”

“Ma, it’s fine. Blake has been more than generous in giving me some work while Dare and I have been stopped here in Rocky.”

“He doesn’t have to be generous. You’re his brother,” she protested.

“And he’s in charge of making smart business decisions, and I stand by him completely,” Jesse offered, a little more sharply than before. “You know damn well I haven’t been an angel, but this isn’t Blake punishing me. I’m thankful for what he’s done, and I don’t want any more of this in here. You want to complain, you can give me hell for being stupid later, but this conversation is over. I don’t want Dare upset. It’s time to go.”

Marion whirled, hand rising to her mouth, worry in her eyes. “Oh my word, I’m sorry, Dare. I didn’t mean to worry you.”

Dare wanted to kick Jesse’s butt for giving his mom hell, but at the same time, he was right. Marion had gone too far. “It’s fine. I’m great, and honestly, you’ve all been wonderful. I know Jesse’s been pleased he could help out.”

“But now it’s time to call it a night,” Jesse said bluntly. “Come on, Ma. I’ll walk you and Dad to the truck.”

Marion insisted on stopping by the bed and offering another apology before they left, Jesse watching over her shoulder to ensure Dare was okay.

Jaxi lingered, motioning for Blake to go ahead. “I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

Blake nodded, then examined Dare’s face before speaking in his deep, rich voice, so much like Jesse’s and yet enough different to have his own unique timbre. A little slower, a little more measured. “You’re a strong one. I think you’ve been good for Jesse.”

“He’s been pretty good for me too,” she admitted with complete honesty.

Blake dipped his chin then headed out, leaving them alone in the room. Well, alone except for the baby in Jaxi’s arms who was snuggled against her chest, his body moving with every breath.

“That was a little bit awkward,” Jaxi said.

Dare shrugged. “She’s a mama bear, right? If she thought somebody had done Blake wrong, she’d do the same for him. But to be clear, I don’t think Blake did anything wrong.”

Not anymore. Strange how quickly her opinion had changed.

“Yeah, Marion is like that. And family is like that. I wanted you to know that even when we disagree, or things go sideways, we are family. It felt like for a while Jesse forgot that, but I hope he’s remembering. We’re family, and we care about each other through thick or thin.”

Something went pop inside Dare’s heart. As if a seal had broken and now there was no way to hold back the emotions slipping out.

No matter what, Dare decided, she was keeping the Colemans. Whatever she and Jesse were was still to be decided, but the Colemans? They were people she wanted to be with. They were people she wanted Buckaroo to grow up around.

“Dare, I hope tomorrow we get news that you’re all clear to get out of here. I was wondering what you’re planning.”

That made two of them. Dare offered a smile. “We were supposed to head home on Tuesday.”

Jaxi settled into the chair beside the bed, adjusting the baby so he lay with his little face turned to the side. “You haven’t had a chance to look around much,” she started, before rolling her eyes and making a face. “Jeez, what’s wrong with me? I never beat around the bush like this. I must be suffering from wishy-washy pregnancy hormones.”

“Oh goody,” Dare said. “I have more things to look forward to?”

A small laugh escaped the woman. “You have so many things to look forward to, wishy-washy hormones are at the bottom of your list. Listen, what I want to say is, straight up, Blake and I and the rest of the family would be thrilled if you guys decided you wanted to move to Rocky Mountain House.”

Wow, this was moving forward at lightning speed. “Like next year? Or after Buckaroo arrives?”

“Next week? Heck, we can send the crew down and bring up your stuff, and you could be moved in—” Jaxi made a face. “Okay, that part will take a little longer until we can juggle you into a house, but yes, as soon as possible. I mean, whenever it works for you guys.”

It was an incredible offer. If she hadn’t had Ginny’s letter that afternoon to push her brain in this direction, Dare would’ve been floored. As it was, she wasn’t as shocked as she might otherwise have been.

Considering all sorts of other issues, the proposition wasn’t something she was going to give any kind of answer to until she and Jesse had a long talk.

“That is an amazing offer, and I’m glad you feel comfortable welcoming me into your family. Thank you.”

Jaxi gave her a considered look. “We love him. You know that, right?”

Dare nodded. That was the strange thing. She had zero doubts how the Colemans felt. She just didn’t know what was best for Jesse’s heart and soul.

“Is that enough reason to move here?”

Jaxi’s eyes widened in shock. “What—? Of course it is.”

“It’s a good enough reason to visit, and keep in touch, but we don’t have to live in the same place to be family.” Dare fidgeted with a quilt square that had been left on the tray beside the bed. She smoothed it under her fingertips, thinking hard. “Isn’t the biggest thing we want is for everyone to be happy? If that’s here—”

“It is,” Jaxi insisted.

The woman was so full of enthusiasm she might overwhelm others, but Dare had years of experience dealing with the hyper energy that was her best friend Ginny. She responded firmly. “Maybe you’re right, but I don’t think we get to decide that for others.”

Jaxi settled back into the chair, an expression of sheepishness spreading. “I was pushing.”

“You were,” Dare agreed, “but I know it’s because you love him, and your in-laws, and the rest of the bunch. But this has to be up to Jesse.”

“And you.” Jaxi raised a brow. “Hey, if you’re going to rightly give me hell for trying to push my agenda, don’t let anyone push you around either, not even my rather tenacious brother-in-law. You deserve to be happy too. In a relationship there are times you have to compromise, not cave.”

“Bend, not break?” Dare smiled now. “You really care about the whole family.”

“I really do.”

“Does that mean what you’re doing with your life is what you really want?” The question came out more judgmental than she’d expected.

Jaxi’s lips twisted. “You mean the fact we’re the same age and I’m a mom five times over?”

Justin’s arms flailed for a second before he curled up tight again. Dare couldn’t look away. “I’m not saying it’s wrong, I was just wondering if it’s really what you signed up for.”

Jaxi laughed, and pure delight filled the room like thousands of butterflies taking flight.

“Getting to be with the man I love more than I love my next breath? Getting to see him play shining knight to our children as he gives them rides and shows them what hands-on love looks like every day? Did I sign up to be surrounded by a family who’d lay down their lives for me? People who guard and love my little ones now, and would in the future if anything ever happened and I couldn’t be there for them?”

Jaxi rose to her feet, adjusting Justin so she could come to the bedside and curl her hand around Dare’s fingers. Jaxi leaned in until their heads nearly touched, and the truth shone in her eyes as she spoke firmly. “I have no idea why I’ve been so blessed, but I wouldn’t change a thing about my life. It’s perfect for me. It’s my dream come true.”

It felt as if the bed was surrounded by tangible joy. Dare nodded again. “I’m glad to know that.”

Jaxi squeezed her hand then backed up half a step before her smile changed. “Now you need to figure out what would make your life perfect. So we can make it happen.”

What would make Dare’s life perfect? It was too big of an idea to wrap her brain around yet. But at least she knew where to start.

A talk with Jesse.

 

 

Jesse’s mom had been surprisingly quiet during the trip to the parking lot. She gave him a fierce hug though before he helped her into the passenger side of his dad’s truck.

He closed the door and turned to go bury his frustrations in a night’s hard labour when his dad stepped in front of him. Jesse expected some kind of comment, but all Mike did was offer a slow nod of approval before walking away.

It was quiet in the barns. Jesse moved through his tasks meticulously, falling into a routine that was familiar and comforting. He debated giving Blake a call to assure his brother of his full agreement, but he figured the point had been made, and if his brother wanted to see him, Blake knew where he was.

By the time morning rolled around Jesse was back to a mostly Zen-like state. Today was when they’d find out if it was safe for Dare to leave the hospital, and at that point they could make some decisions.

He used the bunkhouse showers so he wouldn’t disturb Joel and Vicki. He’d put spare clothes in the truck so it meant he was at the hospital right smack on time to join Dare for breakfast.

He pulled out a second Egg McMuffin from the bag and made a second attempt at bribery. “Are you sure I can’t convince you to trade?”

Dare paused in the middle of another one of those damn sex noises she insisted on making while eating. “Nothing doing, buster. You keep your grubby paws off my oatmeal.”

Then she upended the small side serving of raisins over the surface and stirred them in quickly.

Jesse groaned. “Well, forget it now. You’ve gone and contaminated it.”

She licked her spoon, and his entire body tightened in response.

Tamara poked her head in the door. “I have news.”

Dare stiffened, and Jesse dropped his breakfast back on the tray so he could grab her fingers.

“Relax,” Tamara said, walking into the room. “This isn’t any big shiny news yet. That’s got to come from the doctor, and he should be here by about ten o’clock. By that time the lab in Calgary will have reported in, and I ran this morning’s tests down to the lab myself. So if everything is good, you could be breaking out of here sometime after lunch.”

Which was great, awesome and a complete relief…if everything was good.

Strangely Dare didn’t look as excited as he thought she would. “Thanks for that, Tamara.”

His cousin gave a quick wave and left the room at her usual rapid pace.

He let out a long slow breath. “Okay. Ten o’clock it is.”

“No one’s planning on stopping in this morning, are they?” Dare asked.

He shook his head. “It’s Monday, and since I worked all night I told Blake I was going to sit with you. I figured the doctor would be in. Depending on what happens, we’ll take it from there.”

She swooped her spoon through her oatmeal in distracted circles. “If I do have to stay in the hospital for longer, I don’t need nonstop visitors. I don’t mean that in a negative way, because your family has been awesome.”

“I get it, and I agree. But let’s wait to see what the doctor says.”

“Agreed.”

She finished her breakfast quietly. Jesse tried to distract her with descriptions of the time he’d spent the previous night taking care of the family’s horses. Like old friends, the character of each animal was tied up in his mind with different adventures, and they finished the meal peacefully.

But when the dishes were cleaned up, she patted the mattress beside her hip. “Come here. We need to talk about something.”

He pushed aside the tray and hopped up. “You’re not upset about last night, are you? Honest, things are better than I expected with Blake. Mom was out of line.”

“I wasn’t upset at the time,” she insisted. “I understand why she said something, but you’re right, you screwed up. I would think less of Blake if he didn’t make you toe the line for a while.”

A soft snort escaped before he could stop it. “Oh yeah, I screwed up royally. It’s what I do.”

His comment didn’t go over well. She leaned in so she could glare into his face. “Don’t be a jackass and put yourself down like that. I think you’ve done a lot of good things just during the time I’ve known you.”

Somehow she always managed to make him feel better about himself. “Okay, I can sort of agree with you. You’re a good thing, and I’ve done you.”

Dare didn’t roll her eyes, but he could tell she was tempted. Then she took a deep breath and shoved him off the cliff.

“I’m going to go on the premise that everything is fine and I’ll be set loose today. Which means we pretty much get to go forward and do the next thing. I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, and I wanted to know what you think of us moving to Rocky Mountain House.”

Everything inside him froze. “When? Next year? Or after Buckaroo arrives?”

For some strange reason that made her laugh.

“Maybe sooner than that.” He sat back a little and she hurried on. “I’m not even saying for sure this is what I want to do, but I’m putting it forward as an idea. I don’t need to be in Heart Falls, and there might be good reasons for me to not be there.”

Okay, this was a conversation he had not expected to have right now. He fought to keep his emotions from showing, but it was probably a lost cause considering the hell yes and the oh my God, no battling inside him. He wasn’t sure what his face looked like.

Then his confident, always-together woman began rambling.

“Dr. Martins is leaving. So it’s not as if I even get to have her around to deliver Buckaroo. There’s no hospital in Heart Falls, just the clinic, which means I have to go to Black Diamond when it’s time. I like Dr. Kincaid, and obviously Jaxi and Blake like him, and your multitude of cousins. You said you could walk to the maternity ward with your eyes closed—I hope you don’t have to, but that’s kind of reassuring, all things considered.”

Now her reasoning made more sense, even though he was still confused. “So…you want to live here until Buckaroo is born?”

She was fidgeting with the edge of the blanket now. “I know Caleb offered you a job, and you would do awesome working at Silver Stone, and if that’s what you want then that’s what we should do, but…” Dare met his gaze again. “If you can work here with your family again, it seems like that’s what you should be doing. Not starting all over somewhere else. Not unless it’s what you absolutely need.”

“I don’t know that either job is better than the other. If we move here that means you’d be leaving your family. What about Ginny? What about the girls?”

Dare wrinkled her nose. “Okay, this is Ginny’s secret not mine, but she’s not planning on being around after September. Yes, I’ll miss the girls, but I also don’t want to be their mom. I’m afraid right now Caleb might take advantage of the fact that I would be home with the baby.”

“Oh, like hell would he take advantage of you. It’s one thing to help with the rug rats at times, it’s another for him to expect it of you.” There. Something he actually had a solid opinion on. Maybe he hadn’t lost his mind completely.

She shook her head. “I don’t think Caleb does it to take advantage of us. He’s a really good daddy, actually, but he is kind of oblivious to how much we do to help him out. You’re right, if we go back, I’ll have a talk with him. It’s another thing that makes coming here work, though. But if the idea is too hard to consider right now, I understand completely, and I’m just as happy to go back to Heart Falls. We’ll figure out the stuff with Buckaroo.”

Confusion returned. “You’re not making any sense. Which is it, Dare? Do you want to move to Rocky, or do you want to go back to Heart Falls?”

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly before looking him in the eye again. “I think I would like to move to Rocky, but if that is too difficult for you, I have no objections to making Heart Falls work.”

Better, but it was still not quite there. “Why in the hell do you think it would be so hard for me to move to Rocky? I told you everything was looking great with Blake and the family.”

She broke eye contact. “I know why you left.”