Chapter Twenty-Nine

Blog post: Plant a Seed

One of the things I admire the most about people is when I discover they’ve done something that has far-reaching consequences they may never get to enjoy.

The simplest example of this is people who plant a tree. You’ve seen it, driving through a new area of town where there’s nothing but infrastructure in place. Roads, maybe, and the skeletons of houses rising in the middle of barren land. Once the houses are there, people put in lawns and plant trees, and in some ways it looks a little ridiculous because the trees are about the size of a pencil, but future-thinking people don’t look and see what’s there at that moment. They’re imagining what it will look like tomorrow.

Then we drive across town to a community that’s been there for years. The trees rise above the rooflines, green growing things everywhere.

In the country, we plant windrows. At the edge of a field we put in a line of trees that are nothing but hope and anticipation. Five or ten years down the road, they’ll become a solid line of protection that keeps the soil in place and the crops from damage.

Sometimes we don’t know what a difference we’ll make in the future. Sometimes we do—a deliberate choice.

Either way, it’s an interesting concept to consider that while we live in the present we’re impacting the future.

 

Jesse knew exactly what he wanted, but getting to that point was proving to be far more difficult than he expected.

He’d been blessed far more than he’d deserved, and had a fair share of miracles, but the good things had come down to fate a lot of the time.

He and Dare had met by chance. He’d only tracked her down because of the meme. Even his first proposal had been spur of the moment, but now that he was no longer being stupid, and both he and Dare knew they were in love, he wanted to do it up right.

He wanted this proposal to be very deliberate. Something that she could look back on and know that he’d put thought and energy into it because she was worth it. A memorable experience for the rest of their lifetime. He was so ready to do this.

Dare was not cooperating.

Not that he expected her to willingly follow his lead when he wouldn’t tell her what was going on, but fate was making it impossible to sneak her away without anyone else coming along. And by anyone, he meant Vicki.

Thick as thieves, the two of them. The fact it didn’t make his mind hurt was another miracle he’d just accept.

That morning he’d made sure to find out when Vicki was busy at work. Then he’d rearranged his work schedule so he could sneak away to have an afternoon coffee with Dare, and finally put into play what he’d been setting up for a while.

Only when he drove into the yard, Vicki’s truck was there.

Fine, he wasn’t going to even try to be sneaky anymore.

Jesse took the stairs two at a time and pushed into the living room to discover them pouring over something on the computer screen. “Ladies.”

Vicki straightened up, grabbed their empty glasses and headed to the kitchen. “Hey, Jesse. I’ll be right back, Dare.”

Dare attempted to rise to her feet and failed. She rolled her eyes and held out a hand. “Help the pregnant lady. I’m stuck.”

He chuckled as he stepped forward and lifted her to her feet. “Hey, did the Buckaroo bump drop about a foot since this morning?”

“You’re so observant.” She patted him on the cheek a couple of times a little sharper than necessary before offering a real smile. “What are you doing home so early?”

He opened his mouth to tell her he was stealing her away when the sound of tires burning out in the parking area drew their attention to the front window.

Tamara was getting out of her old beater of a truck, marching toward the door as if she had an agenda.

So much for his and Dare’s quiet get-together.

The front door opened, and both Jesse’s and Dare’s phones went off. By the time Tamara was through the door, Vicki’s phone was ringing as well, vibrating on the table hard enough it wiggled toward the edge.

Tamara slipped off her boots and left them on the mat. “Twenty bucks says those are from Jaxi or Blake.”

Jesse glanced at his phone. “Blake. He wants to know if I’ve seen you.”

His cousin slipped across the room to give Dare a quick hug. “Now you have. Ignore them for a minute. They’re probably going ballistic over there trying to figure out what’s true and what’s rumour.”

This didn’t sound good. “Tamara, what’s up?”

She let out an enormous sigh. “I got fired.”

“Oh my God, why?” Dare caught Tamara by the arm as Vicki returned to the room to add her voice to the question.

Tamara opened her mouth and then closed it quickly. “Okay, this is a lot more awkward than I thought it was going to be. I have been accused of violating the patient/doctor confidentiality agreement. Because of that they can fine me, and or fire me, or both.”

“Are you going to get a lawyer?” Vicki asked. “Someone to fight the charges?”

Tamara made a face then pushed her glasses firmly into position. “No. Because it’s true.”

Jesus. Jesse stepped forward. “Tamara, what the hell?”

“Look, it happened a long time ago. I knew what I was doing. I still believe I made the right decision, but they have every right to do this.”

“Why did it come out now?” Dare had settled back in the chair, and the rest of them joined her so she didn’t have to crane her neck.

“Yeah, that’s the part that sucks. Dr. Tom didn’t like me, and I’m guessing this is his final fuck you gesture, but that doesn’t change the truth.”

“Then why did you do it, if you knew this could happen?” Vicki asked.

“What happens now?” Jesse added.

Tamara paused before answering.

“Chances are once the rumour mill gets hold of this, and with everyone speculating exactly who I talked about, I’m about to become the town pariah.” She shrugged. “Actions have consequences. I’m not about to go and tell everybody why I did it. If people don’t know me well enough to assume it was for a good reason, then I don’t care about their opinion. Yes, I could’ve been wrong, I’m not invincible, but I feel as if what I did was better than not doing it.”

“So now you’re unemployed, but your ego is intact?” Jesse asked.

“My soul—which is more important,” she retorted, before making a face. “I need to leave, though.”

“What?” All three of them.

“There’s no way I can stay. I’m not too proud to get a job at a store in town, but I don’t think I can hold my tongue and provide customer service to people who assume the worst.”

“Can you get a nursing job somewhere else?” Dare asked.

Tamara hesitated again. “Terms of the agreement. The criminal charges would be dropped if I agreed to give up my license.”

“Jesus, Tamara. Criminal charges?” This was more serious than a slap on the wrist.

“I know. I’d do it again in a heartbeat—what I did was legally wrong, but it was morally right.” She turned to Dare. “The reason I’m here is to ask a favour. You think your brother would hire me as a nanny?”

Dare’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”

Tamara nodded. “I can’t actively nurse, and I don’t want to go back to working on the ranch because that means I’d still be living here. But you were telling me about Emma and her speech issues, and maybe I could help in an unofficial capacity. I like kids, and I’m pretty easy to get along with.”

“You’d be working for Caleb. Will that be a problem?”

She shook her head. “If he’s not still pissed off at me for getting the jump on him in the hospital.”

Vicki leaned forward, curiosity written all over her. “Wait. How come I didn’t hear this story before?”

All three of them waved her off.

Dare didn’t hesitate. “You’d be perfect. Ginny is already gone, and since I can’t be with the girls, I would love to have you there. Caleb is not going to have a problem with it, because I will tell him he can stick his ego up his ass.”

Like the air going out of a balloon, tension drained out of Tamara. She collapsed back in the chair, pulling off her glasses to wipe at her eyes before replacing them. “Okay. Now I can breathe again.”

Dare was punching in a message on her phone. “How soon do you want to start?”

“I need a couple of days to pack, that’s it.”

She nodded, hitting send then looking up. “We’ll have to wait to hear back from him to make it official, but thank you.”

“God. I’m the one who needs to thank you. You’re saving my life here,” Tamara said.

Jesse hurried forward to help as Dare worked to get to her feet. “Hey, you’re a mutual-admiration society.”

Dare rested her hands on Tamara’s shoulders. “You trusted us enough to come right away. That means a lot.”

“You’re family.” It was all Tamara needed to say.

It was all it took to have tears forming in Dare’s eyes. He slipped his arm around her shoulders and squeezed tight, waiting as her phone went off again.

“Message from Caleb?” he asked

She nodded, reading aloud. “If you think it’s a good idea, I trust you. I guess.”

Tamara snorted. “It’s not the most enthusiastic hiring I’ve ever had, but I’ll take it.” She stepped forward and offered Dare a hug. “I’m so glad you’re part of this family, and not just because you saved my bacon right now.”

Jesse and Vicki both gave Tamara a hug. She took off, leaving a whirl of energy in the room.

Before they got distracted with anything else, Jesse figured it was his chance to nail down Dare.

“There’s something I want to show you,” he said. “Can you get away for half an hour?”

“Sure.” She finished texting Caleb back before offering a smile. “Let me hit the washroom so I don’t have to find one wherever you’re taking me.”

He watched her walk away, his hand slipping into his pocket to reassure himself he still had everything he needed.

He was finally going to do this.

The silence stretched, and he suddenly became aware it was just them in the room—him and Vicki.

They were alone, and he wasn’t being overwhelmed with guilt or frustration, and the realization was pretty spectacular.

They spoke at the same time.

“I wanted to—”

“There’s something—”

They both stalled out.

Jesse gestured. “Go ahead.”

Vicki nodded and rushed onward. “I’ve wanted to say something for a long time, but kept chickening out. I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry we had a hard time in the beginning, and I’m honestly glad you’re back.”

He examined her face, but she was staring at him seriously with just the faintest hint of a smile. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Vicki shook her head. “Yes, and no. I needed to grow up a little. I was so skittish when Joel and I started dating that I set us up for disaster with the things I imagined might happen. If I’d been more trusting maybe I could have avoided driving a wedge between you and Joel. So I’m sorry. I really do want what’s best for you. And for Dare, and the baby.”

Jesse’s throat was tight, but he nodded briskly, fighting to swallow so he could speak semi-normally.

Dare had called it. It was time for him to take her advice on the other parts of this situation.

“We’re good,” he insisted, “if you can forgive me for being a jealous asshole and not treating you right. I’m glad I didn’t mess things up between you and Joel—you guys are great together.”

She nodded, head bobbing rapidly. “I love him to pieces. And yes, we’re good.”

Jesse glanced down the hall, but there was no sign of Dare yet. “I never got a chance to mention this before. I appreciate you making Dare feel so welcome right from the start. You didn’t have to, especially considering she was with me. I figured if anything you’d have been warning her off.”

“What makes you think I didn’t?”

Jesse’s head snapped back to find Vicki covering her mouth as she fought back laughter. “Did you just tease me?”

“Hard to believe, huh?”

It was impossible to describe the emotions swelling inside him. “I liked it. It’s feels pretty normal—like family.”

Vicki nodded. “Exactly like family.”

They grinned at each other like fools, which is how Dare found them as she came to his side and took him by the hand.

He led her out to the truck, ready to make a memory.

 

 

The now-familiar scenery drifted by, and a deep sense of contentment drifted in. “Your mom invited us over for supper tomorrow night. Think that will work?”

“Sure.”

Dare tangled her fingers in his. “I think Tamara will be good for the girls. Emma will like her.”

Jesse snickered. “Sasha will let us know.”

Was it wrong to ask the question? She went for it anyway. “I didn’t want to ask because I’m just curious, like Tamara said, I don’t need to know the details. I trust her, but…”

“Do I know what she did?” Jesse hesitated. “She said it happened a while ago.”

“Couple of years.”

He shook his head. “I’m not sure. A few years ago I wasn’t paying a lot of attention to the world around me.”

Dare stroked his fingers. “I trust her, though.”

“Me too. She’ll be great for the girls. That Dr. Tom is an asshole,” Jesse snarled. “The only reason he’s dragging this up is because his ego got hurt.”

“Sounds as if his ego is bigger than anything else.”

A laugh burst from Jesse before he grew serious again. “Yeah. Still sucks for Tamara. Having to leave Rocky.”

She knew what he was saying, but then, there was another side to consider as well. “I’ve left Heart Falls and Silver Stone, and it’s turned out okay so far. Maybe this is the first step on Tamara’s journey to a new home.”

He nodded, then turned off the highway and took them down a dirt road that led into the depths of Six Pack land.

Dare looked around with interest as he pointed in different directions and named the landmarks. West toward Angel and Whiskey Creek land. Southwest to Moonshine, and beyond that to the mysterious Uncle Mark’s section.

When he stopped beside a lone tree on the hilltop, she waited in the truck for him to come to her door.

“I’m a little pregnant for a hike in the snow,” she warned as he helped her to the ground and took her by the arm.

“It’s all melted,” he promised. “Just need you to come round the corner here.”

He led her to the base of the old tree. The thing was a behemoth, with gnarled branches and a sturdy base. A weatherworn heart was carved in the trunk, with Vicki’s and Joel’s names in it, and she had to smile. She traced a finger around the edges. “That’s sweet.”

Jesse looked thoughtful for a moment. “You were right, by the way. About Vicki and Joel. We’re good, once I got my head out of my ass.”

“I do like you un-assholed,” Dare teased.

He arranged her so she could lean comfortably on the trunk before placing one hand on the tree beside her to turn himself into a wind block.

Then he stared at her face. His expression so clear and readable. He was baring himself to her—ready to give her nothing but the truth.

“For a lot of years I struggled with where I fit in. I was never alone, yet I was too damn cocky to admit that I was lonely. Just because I was surrounded by people didn’t mean I was connected to them.” He stroked her cheek. “I know a lot of that had to do with how I was acting. I shouldn’t have expected people to want to cuddle up with a hedgehog.”

She didn’t speak but she nodded.

“I don’t feel alone anymore,” he declared.

“I’m glad that you’re back with your family. That you and Joel are good friends again.” It was easy to be happy for him. A little as if she’d been waiting for the rain to stop falling, and their patience had been rewarded when a beautiful rainbow appeared.

He cupped her chin in his fingers. “It’s not just them. I mean, I love them, and I’m glad to be back and accepted, and I’m never going to be so foolish to throw all that away again, but it’s not enough.”

She didn’t understand. “How can it not be enough?”

Jesse took a deep breath “I can’t do this without you.”

“Do what?”

“Anything. I’m nothing without you, Dare. Even with all of my family’s love and support, you made the biggest difference. You’re the one who, in spite of everything I did wrong, kept seeing the good in me. The good things I could do if I stopped doubting and stopped thinking about myself, and started putting myself out for others.”

Her throat grew tight at the emotion in his eyes, and the seriousness of what he was sharing.

“I wouldn’t have seen it if it wasn’t there,” she insisted.

“Maybe.” He leaned in and brushed his lips over hers. “Or maybe it’s there, because like a seed with the potential, you’re the one who helped it grow.”

She was about to reassure him that he was a good man when he went down on one knee in front of her, and her heart leapt into her throat.

His grin was back. That one-hundred-percent cocky-bastard, sexy as sin, flirtatious, irritating and addictive Jesse who’d won her heart from the first moment he’d walked into the bar.

He caught her hand in his. “Darilyn Hayes, soon to become Buckaroo’s mom. As much as I love that you’re carrying my baby, that’s not why I want to marry you. I want to marry you because you own my fucking heart. I want you in my life because I love you until I’m stupid with it, and I need you to say yes so that no matter where we are, I’ll always be home.”

Every part of her from her toes to the top of her head was ready to shout. “You love Buckaroo?”

He leaned in close, talking to her stomach. “She’s talking about you, kid. I think she’s avoiding the question, but to get this straight, yes. I love you. Boy or girl, I don’t give a damn. I’m going to count your toes and fingers, and kiss every one of them, and tell you every day that I love you, even when you’re driving me around the bend.”

Dare fought back the tears that threatened to fall.

Jesse wasn’t finished. He rubbed his hand over her in a gentle caress. “You just be quiet for a bit, though. Your mama is ignoring a very important question, and I need to give her my full attention.”

As if in answer, Buckaroo shifted position, the motion rolling the surface of her belly.

Jesse laughed, kissing her bump before looking up at her with laughter in his eyes.

She dragged in a shaky breath. “If I wasn’t already in love with you, that would have sent me over the edge.”

“Kissing your belly?”

“Talking to our baby like he understands every word you’re saying.”

“Buckaroo’s smart. Like you said, our baby.” Jesse rose to his feet and curled a hand behind her neck. “I mean it, Dare. I swear as long as I’ve got breath in my body, I’ll be there for you. I’d wrestle death to keep you safe.”

She was going to be a blubbering mess if he kept this up. “Jesse…”

He kissed her, lips so soft and tender against hers before pulling back just far enough to give her a saucy wink. “I didn’t hear a yes yet from those sweet lips of yours. You gonna marry me for all the right reasons?”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Dare teased.

Bright laughter rumbled up from deep in his chest. “You’re trouble today.”

“Today and every day, isn’t that how you like me?”

He leaned closer. “Say yes.”

“But I want to marry you for the sex.”

Jesse laughed out loud then touched their foreheads together. “Tell me yes, woman.”

Dare cupped his face in her hands. She spoke from the depths of her heart, and the only words she had to say, pretty much said it all. “I love you.”

“I know.” He winked at her indelicate snort. “Dare.”

No more holding back. No more teasing, because the truth poured out of her heart and very soul. “Yes. Yes, I’ll marry you. Not because Buckaroo needs a daddy, and not because your family is so damn awesome. Not because marrying you means I get to be around Vicki and Joel, who fit into my world and my heart very nicely, thank you.”

He waited, love written all over his face.

She reached up on her tiptoes and whispered against his lips. “Yes, because you’re home to me too.”