Jax is quiet on the ride to the mall, but he wound his fingers through mine the moment we jumped in his SUV, and he’s been stroking my palm with his thumb for the last twenty minutes. And it’s driving me damn near insane with lust.

By the time we reach the parking lot, I have half a mind to jump him in his seat, but I don’t want to ruin his plans. He wants to hang out in all the places my mom and I enjoyed, so I’ve brought him to our number one spot. The Old Orchard Mall.

“Are you sure this is what you want to do today?” I ask skeptically as we mill about by the indoor fountain.

“Yup.” He tucks me under his arm and kisses my forehead. “But you need to narrate our trip. Tell me where you two went. What you loved. What made you guys laugh.”

Tears prick my eyes, and I blink them back. I’m not sure if they’re from the sudden rush of emotion I get from remembering my mom or how my heart fills with love for Jax, but I’m overwhelmed nonetheless.

We haven’t had sex since New Year’s Eve a week ago. But it hasn’t fazed him. He’s been nothing but amazing. Cleaning the house. Helping me go through my mom’s stuff. Calling Susan for recipes and attempting to make me dinner. And as hard as it’s been, I haven’t slept with him since. I wanted space. I wanted to give him the opportunity to back away from this if he had just gotten too caught up. Because people make mistakes. And I don’t want to be one of his. Nor him mine.

So each night I’ve slept nestled against him, and we talk until exhaustion overpowers us. And each morning I look into his eyes and wonder if he’ll view at me differently, maybe with regret or indecision. But he wakes with a grin on his face and my name on his lips. With his hands in my hair and his breath on my skin. Like he can’t get enough. Like he misses me even though we’re snuggled together under the covers. Well, like he loves me.

I sniffle, and he turns me in his arms. “Dandelion, I’m sorry. Maybe this is a bad idea.” He wipes an escaping tear as he holds my face. “I wanted to learn about your mom. To learn more about you. I love seeing you in your home so much, I thought if you showed me places you enjoyed growing up, I could—“

“Oh my God. Stop.” I place my lips on his for a soft kiss. More tears fall while I wrap my arms around his neck and rest my head on his chest.

He strokes my hair, and we stand in the middle of the mall as people pass around us. I close my eyes and breathe him in.

“I love you too, Jax.” A part of me feels bad that I haven’t told him yet, but I wanted to make sure that he meant what he said the other night. That it hadn’t just slipped out because we were naked.

But now I know he means it, and I want him to know I’ve never loved another man more.

At first, I don’t think he hears me, but then he laughs, squeezing me tighter before he leans down and brushes his lips against mine. “Thank God.”

I giggle, and he kisses me deeper before some guy barks, “Get a room!”

We pull away from each other and laugh, and I dare say Jax’s cheeks look flushed.

“Are you blushing, Jax Avery?” I ask as I tuck my arm through his.

“Nah. It’s hot in here. I’m wearing layers.” He keeps his eyes trained straight ahead, but his lips curl up.

“Hmm. I’m going to call bullshit. I think you blushed.”

“Men don’t blush, babe.”

“You’ll forgive me if I have to test that theory.” I lead him around a pack of sorority girls who stare at my boyfriend like he’s a steak and they’ve been on a steady diet of twigs and berries. The best part? He never glances their way. Ha! #BiteMeBitches

“Be my guest, Dandelion.”

I grin to myself as I spot the store I need because I’m going to need some good ammunition to make this boy blush. I pull Jax to a stop and turn him toward the mecca of sugary goodness.

“I need to do a little shopping, sweetie pie.” I peck him on the cheek. “So while I make a quick stop, you need to stand in that line over there and get us two caramel Pecanbons, which were my mom’s favorite.”

“Cinnabon, huh? I like this plan.”

“I like you.” I lean up to kiss him.

“No, you love me.” He’s joking, but there’s something in his eyes that completely melts me.

Grinning, I pull away. “I do. And I plan to show you just how much.”

He tries to grab me, but I dart away, laughing. Tonight is going to be epic.

* * *

Peeking around the corner, I see Jax sprawled on the couch, watching a basketball game. The room is dark, illuminated only by the flickering light from the TV.

I know he must be tired. After our trip to the mall, he shoveled the remaining snow out of the driveway and trimmed several branches in the backyard that looked like they might collapse on the porch. Then, right before we sat down for dinner, I found a present on the kitchen counter. All it said was “To Dandelion” in Jax’s blocky handwriting. Beneath the pale pink wrapping paper, I found a new leather journal.

When I glanced up, I found Jax watching me. “I didn’t mean to look in your journal. I’m sorry I had it all this time.”

My heart beat in a crazy rhythm as we stared at each other, but then Susan knocked on the front door, so all I did was give him a quick hug to say thanks.

But now we’re alone. And now I can’t wait to show him his present.

Jax just took a shower, and his damp hair is sitting at crazy angles. I can’t help but think of the one we took together at his apartment. How he let me cry on his shoulder. How he held me and whispered soothing words to calm me down before he sank to his knees and placed his mouth on me.

The memory makes my heart race. As I stare at him, the longing in my chest becomes almost unbearable. I tiptoe farther into the living room, and he looks up. His eyes widen as he takes in the fact that I’m only wearing a t-shirt.

“Jax, do you like lingerie?”

He clears his throat. “Babe, I’m a guy. All guys love that stuff. But you don’t need lingerie. You’re rocking out the t-shirt just fine.”

I frown. “Oh, well, then maybe I didn’t need to get this.” I pull off my shirt, and Jax sucks in a breath.

The lacy black baby doll barely comes to the top of my thighs. The room is cold, and my nipples tighten, and I know he can see the silver hoops beneath the thin fabric. My fingers toy with the hot pink bow between my breasts as I wait for him to say something. When he doesn’t, I chew my bottom lip. The back! He needs to see the back!

I twirl around and then bend over slightly so he can see the frilly panties. Glancing at him over my shoulder, I put on a pout. “So… You’d rather I wear the t-shirt?”

“Get over here.”

Laughing, I shake my head. “I don’t know. As I recall, you’ve kept me waiting a time or two.” I rest my hand on my hip as though I really mean to scold him.

“Right the fuck now, Danielle.”

Before I can come up with a witty reply, he reaches out and yanks me onto his lap so that I’m straddling him. He leans up to kiss me, but I pull away. “Impatient, are we?”

“Babe, you’re asking for it.” A growl escapes his lips. “I’m going to fuck you six ways from Sunday if you’re not careful.”

I had intended to use this moment to prove my theory that guys can blush. Instead, my breath shallows, and my body feels feverish from the way he’s looking at me. I press my hips down and grind against the hardness beneath me. “Promise?”

His devilish grin makes me throb harder. “Boy Scout’s honor.”

I smack his shoulder. “You were never a Boy Scout.”

He laughs and pulls me closer. “Wanna bet?”

Jax dips his head to my chest. Before I can blink, one hand is fisting my hair and the other is plumping my breast into his mouth. But what kills me, what sets me on fire, is how he keeps his eyes trained on mine.

His tongue flicks at the metal hoop through the fabric of my nighty as my hands grip his biceps.

When I can’t take it any longer, I tug on his t-shirt, which he whips off before he reaches for the hem of my top. He flings it off me, and I reach down to unbuckle his jeans. My fingers tremble as they unsnap the button, and I’m surprised when his big hands wrap around my wrists to still me.

“Baby, as much as I want this, we don’t have to. If you want more time, if this is too much, we can wait.” He closes his eyes, and I’m struck by how his whole body is taut, like it’s taking everything in him to stop our momentum. “I shouldn’t have pushed you the other night. I’m sorry. I got carried away, and—“

I answer him with a kiss as I push him down on the couch and press my body along the length of his. “I’m ready.” I run my tongue along the seam of his lips. “I love you. I want this. Just as much as you do.”

“I love you too, babe.” He groans as our mouths fit together, and he fists my hair again. I reach down between us and stroke him over his jeans as I suck his tongue to the same rhythm. And just like that, we’re feverish to get the rest of our clothes off. He tugs down his pants, and I kick off my undies until there’s nothing between us.

Tilting my head, I let my long hair tumble to the side. His name falls from my lips as I widen my thighs and press myself down until he is wedged perfectly against the apex of my thighs. I rub against him slowly. We stare down where our bodies meet, and the sight makes me grind down harder.

His fingers grip my hip to still my motion before he reaches over and pulls a condom from his jeans. Once it’s on, I angle him toward me.

As I sink down, he moans. “Fucking fuck, you feel good.” I’d love to revel in the fact that I’m making him fall apart, but all I can mumble is “mmm.”

I still to get used to his invading size, but after a minute, I want more and sink down as far as I can go, and we both groan at the sensation.

My skin is flushed and damp from sweat as our bodies begin moving against each other. Leaning down, I kiss him, and his hands tangle in my hair.

And it’s at this very moment that my head decides to freak out.

I still have another year of school to go, and Jax is graduating in a few months. Doesn’t that kind of thing screw up relationships, especially since he’s been talking about signing with a professional soccer team?

The words come out of my mouth before I can stop them. “What happens after you graduate? If you sign with a team, you’ll go on the road.”

Jax stills beneath me and reaches up to tuck my hair behind my ear. “You know that answer.” He stares long and hard into my eyes before he pulls my mouth to his for a gentle kiss. “We stay together.” He holds my face with both of his hands. “Because you’re what makes me want everything else.”

Tears fill my eyes and I collapse on top of him and bury my face in his neck. His arms wrap around me, and we lie there entwined.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper as his hand rubs up and down my back. “It’s is a stupid time to talk about this.”

“Sweetheart, being together is the only thing that matters to me. We’ll figure out the rest.”

I turn and kiss him, for minutes or hours, I can’t tell. All I know is I get lost in the way he tastes, in the way our bodies meld together. And then he flexes his hips, and the swelling sensation between my legs has me desperate all over again. Even though I just had this weird emotional break down and I should probably be embarrassed, when I look in Jax’s eyes, all I see is his love for me.

He holds the back of my neck as he shifts so we’re on our sides. His hand wraps around my thigh as he tugs it up over his hip, and he presses deeper into me.

His thigh slips between mine until our legs are scissored together, and my breath catches. I’ve never had sex like this, twisted around another person so intensely that I can’t tell where I end and he begins. Everything—from the way our breaths mingle to how his fingers are twined through mine as he looks into my eyes—tells me this is love.

I’m pinned by his stare, the intensity unraveling the part of me that’s been afraid. All week, I’ve been waiting to be disappointed. Waiting for him to change his mind. But right now I feel anchored to him, like he’s my mooring. Like I’m his. And just like that, my fears melt away. I don’t know what’s going to happen, what the future holds, but I do know I want to take this journey with him.

Jax nips my shoulder as he slowly pushes in and out of me. His arm wraps tightly around my thigh, hugging me to him, and I can’t get close enough. The drag of his skin against mine is so exquisite, the throb between my legs intensifying until everything inside of me tightens and pulses, and I’m falling apart. With a scream, I gasp, and a moment later, he tenses as he comes.

The room is quiet but for the sound of our heaving breaths. Jax runs his hand along my back in a slow drag, pressing the tips of his fingers into my skin. Although exhaustion weighs all of my muscles, I reach up and thread my fingers through his sweaty hair, and he murmurs his approval.

“Jax,” I whisper, “thanks for coming to Chicago to find me.”

I close my eyes as he pulls me closer, and I nestle my head against his chest and listen to his heartbeat.

“Dandelion, I’m starting to think you’re the one who found me.”